Neeranam Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 Are there any guys out there with married "loo kroong" daughters? Did you ask for a dowry, and if so how much? If she/they are not married yet - will you ask for a dowry? Does anyone know any farang that asked for a dowry? Could be an important factor in my retirement Who would decide, you or your Thai spouse? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarragona Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 I'm sure my spouse would expect a dowry, but then I'm equally sure she would give it back to the happy couple (which is what I would insist on in any case). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
steveromagnino Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 I know a few.... in most cases (as with almost all my Thai friends) the dowry was paid; a fairly large one in most cases (BKK living, foreign education, high paying jobs, good families) but then given straight back to the couple for their first house. Can only think of one case where the daughter (actually full Thai) the family hated the groom and made him pay a multimillion baht sin sot then didn't return it simply to try to discourage the marriage...didn't work though; so they might have given it back to the daughter by now.... So much the same; would be different if raised overseas as so many overseas raised look krueng aren't really 'Thai' in their outlook and probably would end up following customs of that country. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dr_Pat_Pong Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 I'm sure my spouse would expect a dowry, but then I'm equally sure she would give it back to the happy couple (which is what I would insist on in any case). <{POST_SNAPBACK}> He didn't want so much information. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pnustedt Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 my step daughter got married three weeks ago and a dowry (equiv. Bt 250,000) was paid. Not sure what happened to it tho However, the groom acquires a share in a HK apartment we bought for step daughter (a few mill bt) and gold (about Bt100K). I don't reckon I made on the deal! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sbk Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 Sold? I suspect the girl might object to that characterization since no Thai person considers it "selling" their daughter. I don't know why it is so hard for some people to understand that in traditional normal families this money is returned to the young couple to start their lives with. Consider it more like the showing the ability to care for the girl. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snoophound Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 Well my missus is 10 yrs in aus Her daughter is Thai father deceased and Thai mother. She is 20 The thai boy she is marrying is a student here in Sydney. Hes 21 and a hard worker. His parents are middle class...he even manages to send money back. Our last trip the Boys mum very shyly asked how much sin sod. To her credit the Missus said ...as long as your son looks after my daughter "No Worries" Daughter v attrctive,aus educated and au passport Under all this stuff she was a bargain!!!!!!! Sold? I suspect the girl might object to that characterization since no Thai person considers it "selling" their daughter. I don't know why it is so hard for some people to understand that in traditional normal families this money is returned to the young couple to start their lives with. Consider it more like the showing the ability to care for the girl. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrbojangles Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 I don't know how much she would be worth, but her passport has got to be worth a few pounds/dollars/baht Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snoophound Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 that was our worry for sure. But....what can ya do young love. and he really is a nice boy works 7 days incl school,gives her everything she wants...poor bugger. Mum trained her well. T I don't know how much she would be worth, but her passport has got to be worth a few pounds/dollars/baht <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tom yum goong Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 Are there any guys out there with married "loo kroong" daughters?Did you ask for a dowry, and if so how much? If she/they are not married yet - will you ask for a dowry? Does anyone know any farang that asked for a dowry? <{POST_SNAPBACK}> I'm a "loo kroong" and i have an older sister who is getting married next year. I dont think there would be any circumstance where my parents would ask for a dowry. I guess its possible that if the grooms family offered, they would accept and give it back to the couple. However she's marrying a guy from Hartlepool and i don't think they have dowries up there... I also know a few other luuk kreungs who have gotten married (to farang men) and as far as i know, there was never any dowry involved. So to Neeranam, i guess u either need to find a rich Thai groom for your daughter or rethink your retirement plans. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thetyim Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 My daughter is 17 years old. I have never thought about how much for SinSot, but whatever I decide it will be double for a thai man. Oh YES, sweet, sweet revenge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
britmaveric Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 Sold? I suspect the girl might object to that characterization since no Thai person considers it "selling" their daughter. I don't know why it is so hard for some people to understand that in traditional normal families this money is returned to the young couple to start their lives with. Consider it more like the showing the ability to care for the girl. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> If its anything like the stats Stickman gives - odds of ever seeing the dosh again are minute. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tuky Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 My daughter is 17 years old. Old Scampy had better start saving then, he will be of marriageable age in a few years Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sbk Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 Sold? I suspect the girl might object to that characterization since no Thai person considers it "selling" their daughter. I don't know why it is so hard for some people to understand that in traditional normal families this money is returned to the young couple to start their lives with. Consider it more like the showing the ability to care for the girl. If its anything like the stats Stickman gives - odds of ever seeing the dosh again are minute. I did say a normal traditional family. I have been to literally hundreds of weddings over the years and I would say that over 75% give the money back to the kids. Maybe it is different amongst Thais. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zzap Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 So... 'loo kroong' are the ones to go for, usually English speaking, no sin-sot required because a farang parent is involved, and if you're lucky they'll also have a passport to a country you haven't been to yet! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lingling Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 Post a pic if you want a collective appraisal by TV members and then go for the average amount suggested. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pluto_manibo Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 My daughter is 17 years old.I have never thought about how much for SinSot, but whatever I decide it will be double for a thai man. Oh YES, sweet, sweet revenge. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> LMAO ....Finally dual pricing in our favour! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elsie Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 Sold? I suspect the girl might object to that characterization since no Thai person considers it "selling" their daughter. I don't know why it is so hard for some people to understand that in traditional normal families this money is returned to the young couple to start their lives with. Consider it more like the showing the ability to care for the girl. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> You put the words right out of my mouth, sbk. That's the whole idea about Sin Sod. Lots of dimwits out there, it seems. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kringle Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 Too bad we all can't be like pnustedt and have a money tree that just keeps on growing, no matter how much you pick it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zzap Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 (edited) dbl. post Edited December 6, 2005 by zzap Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zzap Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 (edited) You put the words right out of my mouth, sbk. That's the whole idea about Sin Sod. Lots of dimwits out there, it seems. Well, if "showing the ability to care for the girl" is the concern, why not simply look at his assets (no punn intended) and bank-balance? That's what we "dimwits" do in the West, rather than making the groom take out loans towards his future wages for some status-thing. Edited December 6, 2005 by zzap Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elsie Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 First of all, different coutries, different continents, different traditions. Very difficult to understand eh? Secondly, the keyword is "traditional normal families". In a normal family, the girl's parents wouldn't talk an impossible number so the guy had to take out a loan or something. Never saw that happen in my family. There are a lot of normal families out there. If you manage to find a greedy family, the choice is yours. And last but not least, this is a very good post on the matter... if you haven't read it yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OlRedEyes Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 Hmmm. has nothing to do with face in the community... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sbk Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 Not from what I've seen. Very rarely is the sin sod discussed in real terms outside the immediate family, from my experience. My nephew just got married (big wedding--1500 people) and I wasn't told what the sin sod was, neither did I ask. None of my business. I imagine it was a goodly sum as his parents both have money--that is where the money is supposed to be coming from, has been my impression --not from loans or from the boy's savings, but from the family. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elsie Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 No, not at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zzap Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 First of all, different coutries, different continents, different traditions. Very difficult to understand eh? <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Well, yes, for us dimwits, you know... Secondly, the keyword is "traditional normal families". In a normal family, the girl's parents wouldn't talk an impossible number so the guy had to take out a loan or something.So, 50-200k is an amount the average youngster (in "traditional normal families" they do marry young, don't they) has lying under his pillow? Plus the gold, of course. Not to mention the 1mil asked of the OP, but that's a farang, they'll certainly have it. And last but not least, this is a very good post on the matter... if you haven't read it yet.Oh, thanks for the link, I haven't come across this thread before! Quite a good explanation, actually. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sbk Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 LC, at least here, where I live the appearance of face in the community is expressed more in the size of the wedding than the size of the sin sod. ie the more people you invite the more important you are. But perhaps that is because I live in a fairly small, enclosed community where, as I have said before, everybody knows everybody else. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sbk Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 Secondly, the keyword is "traditional normal families". In a normal family, the girl's parents wouldn't talk an impossible number so the guy had to take out a loan or something.So, 50-200k is an amount the average youngster (in "traditional normal families" they do marry young, don't they) has lying under his pillow? Plus the gold, of course. Not to mention the 1mil asked of the OP, but that's a farang, they'll certainly have it. Guess you missed my post where I said that, from my experience, the money has come from the boy's family? Or is it just easier to quote the parts that fulfill what you want to hear? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zzap Posted December 6, 2005 Share Posted December 6, 2005 Some posts have criss-crossed, no need to snap at me. That makes sense, so the sin-sod is also a way of making sure socio-economical compatibility between the families? Sorry, I am a bit slow.dimwits, you know... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neeranam Posted December 6, 2005 Author Share Posted December 6, 2005 Maybe I shouldn't have said 'sold' - I was being facetious. I was wondering if anyone had asked for a dowry, if they are married to a Thai and living in Thailand. I try to do as the Thais do when living here. I could see the Thai man thinking that it's a farang, so he'd get away without paying one. My wife said it would depend on a lot of factors, including the type of family he came from and how rich he was. I see it as the ability to look after her, to the same standards she is used to. If the guy couldn't get his hands on 1 million baht or so, even if a short term loan - I would start to worry why not! I've known a few Thai guys to get bank loans in order to pay their sin sod. They say it is normal procedure at the bank - borrowing for a few days. I think if she married into a rich family, there would be a loss of face if there weren't any dowry - it's the first thing many people ask. Kind of like all the women in my country looking at the engagement ring and wondering how much it cost. At the weddings I've been to, it is usually the question many folks want to know - especially if it is a wealthy, influential family. One hi-so wedding, Thai 2 Thai, where the prince made a brief appearance - there was a dowry that was estimated at 5 million baht + a ruby ring. Everyone was talking about it. At another one lower down the class system it was 100,000 baht and I overheard some women saying they felt sorry for the girl's parents as it was only 100,000 from a farang. Normal traditional Thai families - I'd agree that it may be around 75% return as someone suggested. I guess that out of 30 or so Thai-farang marriages that I know of, I only know of 5 that got all the cash back. The surprising thing with them is that 4 were Thai Chinese families! maybe there is a long-term business strategy here. I've heard of many more not getting the money back. I'd rather that the guy was decent, regardless of his finances. If he were a prick - I'd ask for a lot, non-returnable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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