Living With Thai Husband In The Countryside

[Nikki321]

Hi, I'm interested to hear from foreign women who live outside the cities with their Thai husbands and how they get on with cultural changes, how it was to adjust at the beginning etc

I have recently moved to a village in the outskirts of chiang rai where I'm living with my new husband in his mum's house (for now but not forever!), it's quite a big adjustment in many ways- some wonderful things and some more challenging. What are other peoples experiences been?

[Carry]

Wow, that must be a big adjustment, I have spend a couple of months in the rural village of my husbands family during low season one year, what helped a lot was that we were busy working every day, I think having a purpose and being able to do something structural is important.

it would be in any situation I guess.

The positive side was I learned speaking Thai quickly because English was not an option.

How do you feel about living there? is it for indefinite [living in the village not with the mom!]

Have you got something to keep you busy? Those are important things imo.

[sbk]

Super hard the first few years but we also lived a very rural lifestyle with difficulties with running water and electricity only at night. Social life is zero, its mainly around family and temple activities but since you are near some kind of town it won't be so difficult as it was for me first living on the island, where everything is a trek.

Learn to speak Thai, and honestly, while learning to speak Bangkok Thai is good, if you plan on staying there, learn the dialect, its better to know what is being said around you. Make friends with people, attend family events, go to the Wat and take an active part in the community life and you will find that you are accepted more quickly and life will be easier.

I guess an example might help, part of living in a small Thai community is that you go to alot of funerals. Help out if its a close relative, wash dishes, or whatever, pitching in to help and work is respected.

[phuturatica]

I went to visit my boyfriend's family for a week in Phatthalung and I found it very difficult. I couldn't speak fluent Thai and I didn't have any work to do, however I found that keeping myself busy helped. I played with my boyfriend's neice and babysat her most of the week I was there and I also taught the local children some basic English and played games with them.

I found a week was long enough though and it was a big cultural shock to me.

[g00dgirl]

I usually visit at least twice per year, October and April/May or the occasional funeral or wedding, but I only stay about a week at once (until my clothes are all dirty and I miss my hot water washing machine to get them really clean again).

The biggest issue for me was always the Internet connectivity, this year is the first year that I got an EDGE signal at the house, before there was not even phone network coverage. CAT CDMA worked a little bit in the previous years but hardly usable.

I could imagine staying there for longer, now that there is at least a very basic and slow internet connection, eventually they will get 3G,

but I would want to build a house if that would be the case, because apart from the Internet, the most problematic issues I am having are lack of mosquito screens on windows, too many ants in the kitchen due to garbage stored to close to the kitchen, lack of hygiene in the permanently wet bathroom and lack of any flat surfaces in the bathroom to put anything on apart from one rail type thingy to hang something on, so my clean towel goes on top of MILs dirty, wet underwear and everything is smelly, dark and wet ...

I can deal with cold water showers and using water from big buckets (that used to contain chemicals like fertilizers) and I take my mossie zapper tennis bat thing every time, I also take my own cotton linens because I can't sleep on the plastic nylon sheets.

So for me its mainly about comforts, bugs and hygiene, I speak enough Thai and I get along well with everybody, love to chat to the relatives and neighbors, and with Internet I would not be that bored.

I would miss exercise opportunities like a gym, the beach, and roads to ride my bicycle, or running without worrying about dogs, but I could do some rubber tapping or collecting in the early morning I suppose if I wasn't so arachnophobic

2 weeks ago when I was there, there was a power outage from midday onwards all through the night, that was not so much fun, without fans mossies were really persistent all night long. Taking a candle to the bathroom, all gadgets with empty batteries, but I ended up thinking how I rather have a power outage than have that planned nuclear reactor built 10 km from home, unfortunately one of the 5 planned locations in Thailand is just around the corner.

[g00dgirl]

More on the cultural side, I admire the women, getting up at 5 and spending 2 or 3 hours in the kitchen, cooking several, warm, nutritious meals with all fresh ingredients for the family to eat in the morning and during the day, doing heaps of dishes, I could not adapt well to this because I don't enjoy cooking and doing dishes I hate.

I like to get up early though.

Here in Phuket I have a maid. I am lazy and spoiled, it probably does not look too good in the village.

I try to use the broom to clean the floors so that I don't just sit around, but I always feel inadequate not helping in the kitchen.

I really love to see what MIL gets up to every day outside the house, there is always something to get from the garden, Betel nuts (cutting and drying them), Durian (making durian paste), Tamarind, Coconuts, Bananas ...

[Nikki321]

At the moment I am working out what I want to do living here, as you say I think having a purpose is very important and if possible I hope to set up a small business in the city so I have something outside the village up go too and make a living. It has been complicated slightly by finding out im pregnant a couple of weeks ago, very early days only 7 weeks so I have been feeling pretty sick :-( we're really happy about the baby but it makes me more keen to get started with finding somewhere else to live (it's fine here but with a new baby I am worried about quite a few hygiene issues) its just a very different way of doing things from what I'm used to and I guess I want to bring up my baby in a way that's more familiar to me. Unfortunately I have gone from loving Thai food to not being able to stand the sight of it at the moment, this is upsetting ppl a lot- no one can understand it!! Had to stock up in the city on things I can eat, lucky we're only 30 mins away ;-)

[Carry]

Congratulations on the pregnancy, try to gt a good support network around you for when the baby arrives. and be prepared for a whole lot of [well ment] interfering from everybody around you when it comes to taking care of the baby.

Make sure you feel comfortable and at ease in the place your living, making your own home might become your priority now.

Good luck!

[jubby]

Hi Nikki321,

look on the brightside, your actually on the edge of a City, Close enough to go everyday if you want, Gym's, Coffee Shops, restaurants etc. etc.

I guess How you get on with your mother-in-law is going to be paramount but you could rent something closeby very cheaply if it becomes a problem. I know rents around our village are about 1-2 thousand baht a month compared to 4-5 k + in the city.

make sure you send out gentle signals that your not the little woman from day one so mother-in-law thinks twice about her position

Don't be too concerned about the hygeine as you put it, If you compare it to the Clinically Clean environment your probably used to in the UK, and all the Kids with Colds, Cough's, and asthma etc.. then look around at all the Kids in your Village playing around in the Chicken Sh&t .............. Building up a decent Immune system and generally being Healthy you'll see what I mean.

Hope your going to Breastfeed

[sunspun]

When I first moved to the village I HATED it! HATED HATED HATED!!! I'd find myself several times a day running into our 'room' to cry out my frustrations. And hubby of course had no idea why. The lack of cleanliness, english, friends, as well as that it's a muslim village, so it's 40 degrees, and I have to wear long pants and a long shirt and a scarf! But now, after several years, it actually feels like home.

I learned Thai pretty quickly, and that's the best thing you can do. Once everyone can talk to you, they don't see you as such a novelty anymore you start to feel more welcome, and get a better understanding of how village life works. I hated sitting around like an oaf not knowing what to do or how to ask for what i needed. I am lucky to have wonderful inlaws, who make me feel every bit a part of the family as anyone else, and also stand up for me when people come over to gawk, or talk about me like i can't hear them. My MIL loves to brag about what a 'good cook her daughter is'! I help out around the house, and in the farm - planting or harvesting fruit, and every morning I harvest the rubber. I also leaned how to make roti and have been selling it on the beach for a few years, so often the sisters will set up a shop in front of the house selling drinks and snacks and whatnot, and the pancake stand is my responsibility.

I'm really close with my neices and nephews, and we have a ton of cats and kittens, which keeps me amused for hours, lol. After years of having to drive 3 towns over for internet, I got a mobile stick and that was a definate lifesaver! I'm also really lucky in that there are about 4 or 5 farang girls married to boys in the village now. It's not often we are there at the same time, but 2 of them live there somewhat regularly, so it's great when we can see each other!

It certainly didn't start off great, but after time, I've grown to like it. I've also just found out we have a wee one coming - I'm about 8 weeks and sick as a dog, so I definately feel for you!!!! I'm in my country right now, and I still can't find anything to eat that I can keep down! Have the old ladies been offering you sour fruits and the like? Perhaps they know some foods/herbal remedies to help? If you find something that works, let me know!!!

ps. Phuturatica- where in Phattalung is your bf from? We live just outside of Pabon!

[somtampet]

Congrats to everyone for coping with less than adequate living,and a good relationship it seems.

My question is where did u meet your hubby/bf,as they seem to have no money,so maybe not a middle class Bangkok poseur,and where do u get your work permits from,as some say they want to set up business or tap rubber trees etc etc

[somtampet]

When I first moved to the village I HATED it! HATED HATED HATED!!! I'd find myself several times a day running into our 'room' to cry out my frustrations. And hubby of course had no idea why. The lack of cleanliness, english, friends, as well as that it's a muslim village, so it's 40 degrees, and I have to wear long pants and a long shirt and a scarf! But now, after several years, it actually feels like home.

I learned Thai pretty quickly, and that's the best thing you can do. Once everyone can talk to you, they don't see you as such a novelty anymore you start to feel more welcome, and get a better understanding of how village life works. I hated sitting around like an oaf not knowing what to do or how to ask for what i needed. I am lucky to have wonderful inlaws, who make me feel every bit a part of the family as anyone else, and also stand up for me when people come over to gawk, or talk about me like i can't hear them. My MIL loves to brag about what a 'good cook her daughter is'! I help out around the house, and in the farm - planting or harvesting fruit, and every morning I harvest the rubber. I also leaned how to make roti and have been selling it on the beach for a few years, so often the sisters will set up a shop in front of the house selling drinks and snacks and whatnot, and the pancake stand is my responsibility.

I'm really close with my neices and nephews, and we have a ton of cats and kittens, which keeps me amused for hours, lol. After years of having to drive 3 towns over for internet, I got a mobile stick and that was a definate lifesaver! I'm also really lucky in that there are about 4 or 5 farang girls married to boys in the village now. It's not often we are there at the same time, but 2 of them live there somewhat regularly, so it's great when we can see each other!

It certainly didn't start off great, but after time, I've grown to like it. I've also just found out we have a wee one coming - I'm about 8 weeks and sick as a dog, so I definately feel for you!!!! I'm in my country right now, and I still can't find anything to eat that I can keep down! Have the old ladies been offering you sour fruits and the like? Perhaps they know some foods/herbal remedies to help? If you find something that works, let me know!!!

ps. Phuturatica- where in Phattalung is your bf from? We live just outside of Pabon!

How did u get a work permit?????

[Carry]

When I first moved to the village I HATED it! HATED HATED HATED!!! I'd find myself several times a day running into our 'room' to cry out my frustrations. And hubby of course had no idea why. The lack of cleanliness, english, friends, as well as that it's a muslim village, so it's 40 degrees, and I have to wear long pants and a long shirt and a scarf! But now, after several years, it actually feels like home.

I learned Thai pretty quickly, and that's the best thing you can do. Once everyone can talk to you, they don't see you as such a novelty anymore you start to feel more welcome, and get a better understanding of how village life works. I hated sitting around like an oaf not knowing what to do or how to ask for what i needed. I am lucky to have wonderful inlaws, who make me feel every bit a part of the family as anyone else, and also stand up for me when people come over to gawk, or talk about me like i can't hear them. My MIL loves to brag about what a 'good cook her daughter is'! I help out around the house, and in the farm - planting or harvesting fruit, and every morning I harvest the rubber. I also leaned how to make roti and have been selling it on the beach for a few years, so often the sisters will set up a shop in front of the house selling drinks and snacks and whatnot, and the pancake stand is my responsibility.

I'm really close with my neices and nephews, and we have a ton of cats and kittens, which keeps me amused for hours, lol. After years of having to drive 3 towns over for internet, I got a mobile stick and that was a definate lifesaver! I'm also really lucky in that there are about 4 or 5 farang girls married to boys in the village now. It's not often we are there at the same time, but 2 of them live there somewhat regularly, so it's great when we can see each other!

It certainly didn't start off great, but after time, I've grown to like it. I've also just found out we have a wee one coming - I'm about 8 weeks and sick as a dog, so I definately feel for you!!!! I'm in my country right now, and I still can't find anything to eat that I can keep down! Have the old ladies been offering you sour fruits and the like? Perhaps they know some foods/herbal remedies to help? If you find something that works, let me know!!!

ps. Phuturatica- where in Phattalung is your bf from? We live just outside of Pabon!

How did u get a work permit?????

You are kidding right Somtampet...?! It's not even the point.

[somtampet]

When I first moved to the village I HATED it! HATED HATED HATED!!! I'd find myself several times a day running into our 'room' to cry out my frustrations. And hubby of course had no idea why. The lack of cleanliness, english, friends, as well as that it's a muslim village, so it's 40 degrees, and I have to wear long pants and a long shirt and a scarf! But now, after several years, it actually feels like home.

I learned Thai pretty quickly, and that's the best thing you can do. Once everyone can talk to you, they don't see you as such a novelty anymore you start to feel more welcome, and get a better understanding of how village life works. I hated sitting around like an oaf not knowing what to do or how to ask for what i needed. I am lucky to have wonderful inlaws, who make me feel every bit a part of the family as anyone else, and also stand up for me when people come over to gawk, or talk about me like i can't hear them. My MIL loves to brag about what a 'good cook her daughter is'! I help out around the house, and in the farm - planting or harvesting fruit, and every morning I harvest the rubber. I also leaned how to make roti and have been selling it on the beach for a few years, so often the sisters will set up a shop in front of the house selling drinks and snacks and whatnot, and the pancake stand is my responsibility.

I'm really close with my neices and nephews, and we have a ton of cats and kittens, which keeps me amused for hours, lol. After years of having to drive 3 towns over for internet, I got a mobile stick and that was a definate lifesaver! I'm also really lucky in that there are about 4 or 5 farang girls married to boys in the village now. It's not often we are there at the same time, but 2 of them live there somewhat regularly, so it's great when we can see each other!

It certainly didn't start off great, but after time, I've grown to like it. I've also just found out we have a wee one coming - I'm about 8 weeks and sick as a dog, so I definately feel for you!!!! I'm in my country right now, and I still can't find anything to eat that I can keep down! Have the old ladies been offering you sour fruits and the like? Perhaps they know some foods/herbal remedies to help? If you find something that works, let me know!!!

ps. Phuturatica- where in Phattalung is your bf from? We live just outside of Pabon!

How did u get a work permit?????

You are kidding right Somtampet...?! It's not even the point.

Why should i be kidding??/.I thought i asked a civil question regarding working in Thailand,Are you saying that living up country is different regarding doing illegal working.Part of the post was that u were working in the area that u live,which i responded to.

[Carry]

When I first moved to the village I HATED it! HATED HATED HATED!!! I'd find myself several times a day running into our 'room' to cry out my frustrations. And hubby of course had no idea why. The lack of cleanliness, english, friends, as well as that it's a muslim village, so it's 40 degrees, and I have to wear long pants and a long shirt and a scarf! But now, after several years, it actually feels like home.

I learned Thai pretty quickly, and that's the best thing you can do. Once everyone can talk to you, they don't see you as such a novelty anymore you start to feel more welcome, and get a better understanding of how village life works. I hated sitting around like an oaf not knowing what to do or how to ask for what i needed. I am lucky to have wonderful inlaws, who make me feel every bit a part of the family as anyone else, and also stand up for me when people come over to gawk, or talk about me like i can't hear them. My MIL loves to brag about what a 'good cook her daughter is'! I help out around the house, and in the farm - planting or harvesting fruit, and every morning I harvest the rubber. I also leaned how to make roti and have been selling it on the beach for a few years, so often the sisters will set up a shop in front of the house selling drinks and snacks and whatnot, and the pancake stand is my responsibility.

I'm really close with my neices and nephews, and we have a ton of cats and kittens, which keeps me amused for hours, lol. After years of having to drive 3 towns over for internet, I got a mobile stick and that was a definate lifesaver! I'm also really lucky in that there are about 4 or 5 farang girls married to boys in the village now. It's not often we are there at the same time, but 2 of them live there somewhat regularly, so it's great when we can see each other!

It certainly didn't start off great, but after time, I've grown to like it. I've also just found out we have a wee one coming - I'm about 8 weeks and sick as a dog, so I definately feel for you!!!! I'm in my country right now, and I still can't find anything to eat that I can keep down! Have the old ladies been offering you sour fruits and the like? Perhaps they know some foods/herbal remedies to help? If you find something that works, let me know!!!

ps. Phuturatica- where in Phattalung is your bf from? We live just outside of Pabon!

How did u get a work permit?????

You are kidding right Somtampet...?! It's not even the point.

Why should i be kidding??/.I thought i asked a civil question regarding working in Thailand,Are you saying that living up country is different regarding doing illegal working.Part of the post was that u were working in the area that u live,which i responded to.

lol you are absolutely right, lets move this thing to the visa section asap! Working as in physical work, as in helping family, as in keeping busy, nobody said a thing about being paid....and volunteering is still legal, you know...

Edited May 18, 2012 by Carry

[sbk]

Actually, I was told, as were several other women I have heard of in various areas of the nation , by both Immigration and the Labor Dept that so long as we are helping the husband in the business and not handling money a work permit is not required. We are simply "little wifey helping her husband". It is the same thinking that requires our husbands to request that we be allowed to stay and apply for us, rather than applying on our own merits.

And that sir, ends that off topic attempt at hijacking this thread with your own agenda. Thanks.

[Raesum]

I am almost in the country and we used to stay at his sisters place whenever we came here on holiday. It was OK but as soon as we built our own place and came to live here things changed for me dramatically.We have a communal area in our garden where everyone meets to chat and after a couple of hours I would get "brain Strain" so it was then easier to sidle off to our house and do a bit of cooking or craftwork and have a bit of quiet to myself.

I highly recommend getting somewhere of your own even if the family are good people. It makes such a difference, To me its a bit like saying "Marriage is only a piece of paper".When I got married I felt like he was mine forever and "till death do us part"(that was 20 years ago by the way)

[teacher17]

Hello!!! I haven't posted very much at all in this forum...so here goes.

sunspun-I'd be interested to know where you live in Pabon? You say you live just outside, yes? In what area. I have been living just outside of Pabon for 10 months now (in Nongthong...which is a mostly Muslim village...) but I actually live in a Buddhist village, just across from a temple. I haven't seen any farang women around here (well except for one...but no idea where she was living or where she was from...for all I know if could have been one of the woman on this forum haha!) It would be nice to be able to talk with other farang women....

I teach English in Phatthalung to a lovely bunch of kids at a great school. It can be hard living in the Thai country side, but I have grown to enjoy it. I can always travel to other places if I want to. Plus, it forces me to improve my Thai, which is helpful...

My BF and I currently live in the grandparents house...which has it's ups and downs. We want to make our own place eventually. Sometimes it can be boring...I'll admit that, but I am so busy with teaching that I don't have much time to be bored. Plus, the waterfalls are a great place to go on a hot day.

Cheers!

[mike123ca]

Actually, I was told, as were several other women I have heard of in various areas of the nation , by both Immigration and the Labor Dept that so long as we are helping the husband in the business and not handling money a work permit is not required. We are simply "little wifey helping her husband". It is the same thinking that requires our husbands to request that we be allowed to stay and apply for us, rather than applying on our own merits.

And that sir, ends that off topic attempt at hijacking this thread with your own agenda. Thanks.

If your just helping out with the family business, that seems to be okay. Many men are working here as farmers, but the business is in the wife name.

The problem sometimes the type of work they are doing. Now if they are teaching English at their home and being paid for it. They better have a work permit. Being the wife of thai isn't sufficient.

[sbk]

Actually, I was told, as were several other women I have heard of in various areas of the nation , by both Immigration and the Labor Dept that so long as we are helping the husband in the business and not handling money a work permit is not required. We are simply "little wifey helping her husband". It is the same thinking that requires our husbands to request that we be allowed to stay and apply for us, rather than applying on our own merits.

And that sir, ends that off topic attempt at hijacking this thread with your own agenda. Thanks.

If your just helping out with the family business, that seems to be okay. Many men are working here as farmers, but the business is in the wife name.

The problem sometimes the type of work they are doing. Now if they are teaching English at their home and being paid for it. They better have a work permit. Being the wife of thai isn't sufficient.

Did you read my post at all? The wife helping her husband in his business and is not allowed to handle money. IE so no, she doesn't get paid because she is just the wife helping her husband, The same does not apply to men since the thinking is that the man is the legal head of the family and so therefor could not be helping his wife.

[phuturatica]

When I first moved to the village I HATED it! HATED HATED HATED!!! I'd find myself several times a day running into our 'room' to cry out my frustrations. And hubby of course had no idea why. The lack of cleanliness, english, friends, as well as that it's a muslim village, so it's 40 degrees, and I have to wear long pants and a long shirt and a scarf! But now, after several years, it actually feels like home.

I learned Thai pretty quickly, and that's the best thing you can do. Once everyone can talk to you, they don't see you as such a novelty anymore you start to feel more welcome, and get a better understanding of how village life works. I hated sitting around like an oaf not knowing what to do or how to ask for what i needed. I am lucky to have wonderful inlaws, who make me feel every bit a part of the family as anyone else, and also stand up for me when people come over to gawk, or talk about me like i can't hear them. My MIL loves to brag about what a 'good cook her daughter is'! I help out around the house, and in the farm - planting or harvesting fruit, and every morning I harvest the rubber. I also leaned how to make roti and have been selling it on the beach for a few years, so often the sisters will set up a shop in front of the house selling drinks and snacks and whatnot, and the pancake stand is my responsibility.

I'm really close with my neices and nephews, and we have a ton of cats and kittens, which keeps me amused for hours, lol. After years of having to drive 3 towns over for internet, I got a mobile stick and that was a definate lifesaver! I'm also really lucky in that there are about 4 or 5 farang girls married to boys in the village now. It's not often we are there at the same time, but 2 of them live there somewhat regularly, so it's great when we can see each other!

It certainly didn't start off great, but after time, I've grown to like it. I've also just found out we have a wee one coming - I'm about 8 weeks and sick as a dog, so I definately feel for you!!!! I'm in my country right now, and I still can't find anything to eat that I can keep down! Have the old ladies been offering you sour fruits and the like? Perhaps they know some foods/herbal remedies to help? If you find something that works, let me know!!!

ps. Phuturatica- where in Phattalung is your bf from? We live just outside of Pabon!

I only just saw the P.S part... I can't remember where in Phatthalung and I would ask him but he's currently snoring next to me. however it was a really small village far away from anything. Completely out in the sticks and about 45 minute drive from the main city area of Phatthalung.

[sunspun]

Hello!!! I haven't posted very much at all in this forum...so here goes.

sunspun-I'd be interested to know where you live in Pabon? You say you live just outside, yes? In what area. I have been living just outside of Pabon for 10 months now (in Nongthong...which is a mostly Muslim village...) but I actually live in a Buddhist village, just across from a temple. I haven't seen any farang women around here (well except for one...but no idea where she was living or where she was from...for all I know if could have been one of the woman on this forum haha!) It would be nice to be able to talk with other farang women....

I teach English in Phatthalung to a lovely bunch of kids at a great school. It can be hard living in the Thai country side, but I have grown to enjoy it. I can always travel to other places if I want to. Plus, it forces me to improve my Thai, which is helpful...

My BF and I currently live in the grandparents house...which has it's ups and downs. We want to make our own place eventually. Sometimes it can be boring...I'll admit that, but I am so busy with teaching that I don't have much time to be bored. Plus, the waterfalls are a great place to go on a hot day.

Cheers!

Teacher17 Check your PM

phuturatica - it could very well be the same place we are 50 km from Phattalung city!

[Jenny Adara]

very inspiring comment SBK - hopefully i can follow your advise when i get married!

[WinnieTheKhwai]

Super hard the first few years but we also lived a very rural lifestyle with difficulties with running water and electricity only at night. Social life is zero, its mainly around family and temple activities but since you are near some kind of town it won't be so difficult as it was for me first living on the island, where everything is a trek.

Learn to speak Thai, and honestly, while learning to speak Bangkok Thai is good, if you plan on staying there, learn the dialect, its better to know what is being said around you. Make friends with people, attend family events, go to the Wat and take an active part in the community life and you will find that you are accepted more quickly and life will be easier.

I guess an example might help, part of living in a small Thai community is that you go to alot of funerals. Help out if its a close relative, wash dishes, or whatever, pitching in to help and work is respected.

Very good advice. And exactly the same as for men going to live up-country.

[MissSorapong]

Hi ladys!

I have recently moved to a village in Nakhon Si Thammarat, outside Thung Song city..

Im also finding it HARD sometimes and Im so happy that I find this forum and can

write with others in the same situation!

At the beginning the hardest part for me was to live with other people, 5 of them.

And to wake up so early every morning and go to bed early as well. Big change

for me! I try to learn how to be more patient and adjust to the familys lifestyle.

But sometimes its not easy and even I lock myself in the bedroom and cry sometimes..

I do have moments when Im thinking "why I do this" etc. but I try to think that Im

here by choice and it will become better and better along with learning more Thai.

Only one problem is that the Southern dialect is new to me and I can barley here

what people say sometimes..

Other downers is that I have no internet out here yet. What internet is good when

you live in a rural village?

I do help to cut rubber some days but I need something more to do I just need to

figure out what?

xx

[Goinghomesoon]

I must say I admire anyone that can live full time in their hubby's village. Having our own beautiful, wonderfully airy, cool house has made it easier to visit but 2-3 weeks is still my limit Hubby is going back soon for 2 months and the rest of us will join him for the last couple of weeks. He will do the hard labour on father-in-law's farm first and then we will spend a week or two working on our own place when I am there. I am originally a farm girl and thought i was tough but living without electricity or running water and cooking over charcoal fires is really really hard, really just like glorified camping. Luckily I really like my father in law and the personal relationships with other family members are good, but I'm not sure they would remain that way if I were there full-time!

[Raesum]

Hi ladys!

I have recently moved to a village in Nakhon Si Thammarat, outside Thung Song city..

Im also finding it HARD sometimes and Im so happy that I find this forum and can

write with others in the same situation!

At the beginning the hardest part for me was to live with other people, 5 of them.

And to wake up so early every morning and go to bed early as well. Big change

for me! I try to learn how to be more patient and adjust to the familys lifestyle.

But sometimes its not easy and even I lock myself in the bedroom and cry sometimes..

I do have moments when Im thinking "why I do this" etc. but I try to think that Im

here by choice and it will become better and better along with learning more Thai.

Only one problem is that the Southern dialect is new to me and I can barley here

what people say sometimes..

Other downers is that I have no internet out here yet. What internet is good when

you live in a rural village?

I do help to cut rubber some days but I need something more to do I just need to

figure out what?

xx

Hi Miss Sorapong.Welcome to the forum and Thai life.Sometimes it will amaze you, sometimes it will dissappoint you, sometimes it will make you shake your head and sometimes it will just make you laugh out loud.But just think-you are experiencing something which most of your friends only dream about.

But back to your query.Are you into any craft work or such?? I would recommend you buy a sewing machine and even if you aren't a wiz have a go at making simple things eg tablecloths(which there seems to be a shortage of in this country), pillowslips, small baby quilts or something similar to put on the floor or, you may find around December the weather gets quite cool for Thai people so maybe even some knitting!!! I know it sounds ridiculous but there always seems to be lots of material around in markets for about 30 baht/metre.Ok so its not the pattern youd like but for that price-make things and give them away!!Wool seems to be plentiful too in shops.

Now-as to the machine-I would guess you are quite young and so may not know what a ttreadle machine is.Thailand has many of these. My sister in law gave me an old Singer sewing(treadle) machine a few years ago. I took it to a local place that does machines up and for 2000 baht they replaced the lid and surrounds and attached a motor.It now goes like a rocket.

Not sure if that has helped you at all but just a suggestion.If you needed some help with anything you can PM me.

One other thing is gathering together those photos you have taken(and got printed) and make up a "scrapbook" to show the folks at home when you go back and visit.

[David006]

Hi ladys!

I have recently moved to a village in Nakhon Si Thammarat, outside Thung Song city..

Im also finding it HARD sometimes and Im so happy that I find this forum and can

write with others in the same situation!

At the beginning the hardest part for me was to live with other people, 5 of them.

And to wake up so early every morning and go to bed early as well. Big change

for me! I try to learn how to be more patient and adjust to the familys lifestyle.

But sometimes its not easy and even I lock myself in the bedroom and cry sometimes..

I do have moments when Im thinking "why I do this" etc. but I try to think that Im

here by choice and it will become better and better along with learning more Thai.

Only one problem is that the Southern dialect is new to me and I can barley here

what people say sometimes..

Other downers is that I have no internet out here yet. What internet is good when

you live in a rural village?

I do help to cut rubber some days but I need something more to do I just need to

figure out what?

xx

goodonya gal ..I am Farang with Thai wife not so far from Thung Sung and sister in law ( wifes twin lives in Ron Pibunn..spell?) .Yes even as an alcoholic ( she says) hubby gets boring even if you are ancient like me....however lots of great places, markets forests,beaches, waterfalls etc to visit down south ..just gotta go with the flow and relax!!! It ain't the west..TIT...PM if ya get really BORED...lol

[teacher17]

Yes...I had a problem with the boredom part as well. But once I got my true vision TV and since I have internet at the school I work at, it's not so bad!! haha! Actually, I am disappointed in myself since many years ago people didn't have tv or internet and they did just fine...but we live in a modern world now...so oh well. But at my boyfriend's home I hang around with his family and play with the kids. Now that we have our own place now it's better....living with the family saved money and was convenient, but I finally just needed my own place.

The lack of falang friends is the hardest for me. I see some falang men around (usually older who have families already), but I'd really love to have a falang girlfriend around! haha! I teach special classes (english) the the kids. Miss Sorapong, have you considered teaching english to the village children? You could also make a bit of money if you feel like it. I also got a bird...and I take care of it everyday...I know that sounds silly...but having a pet of some sort (to me) is enjoyable....

The one thing that bothers me the most about living in the rural area is that Thai people (maybe this is in the cities too) like to throw trash EVERYWHERE. It's like they have never heard of a thing called a TRASH CAN (or bin if you're English haha...) Granted, they don't have garbage trucks that come to get the trash and they do usually burn it....but still. The other thing that drived me crazy when I lived with my boyfriend's grandparents, was the fact that they NEVER cleaned the bathroom. It was a decent bathroom...but they NEVER cleaned it. It was always me or my boyfriend who cleaned it...not even his cousin (who lived with the grandparent's and never lifted a finger to help her grandmother,) didn't clean it. Anyway...end of rant haha! But that's one reason I am very glad to have my own place now.

But overall, I find the people to be very friendly and have good experiences with all of them (well...except my boyfriend's dad who is somewhat of an alcoholic...but that's a whole different story). It IS hard living in the country and kudos to everyone who manages to do it!

[MissSorapong]

Hi again!

Thanks alot everyone for your idéas and advices!

Raesum, Im not that into machine sewing but(maybe

I give it a try) I do like to knit and I do jewelery and stuff!

Great idéa with the scrapbooks tough, that could keep me busy for a while!

Goinghomesoon,

So you build your own house in your hubbys village? Please tell me more!

How long time did it take? etc. Was the rest of the family in on it/liked it?

David006, you made me laugh! Do you have any recomendations

for close nice beaches? Thinking of taking a weekend somewhere to

esacape the village.. Yes the waterfalls I visit every Sunday!

Teacher17, So you did also get/build/rent your own home!? Tell me more please,

Im dreaming of a own home at the moment its nr 1 on my wishlist..

We have 3 birds! But they dont seem to like me that much..

But I would love to have my own dog. I got some offers about teaching

but I dont know if its right when I lack experiance?

Our village are very clean, thank god for that! And the home as well..

there are always someone cleaning.

Yup we got our fair share of alcoholics here too. Some kind

of uncle who comes 2-3 times a week and sit drinking on our veranda

to he usally falls a sleep.. Thaipeople are very polite like that, can sit

for ages with visitors and serve them food, beers, fruit etc. That is

one thing that can make me crazy-all the visitors- constanly comming

and stay for hours and hours..

That makes me think of an other issue I will have if I move to my own house..

What would I serve all this visitors? Sure I can cook some thaifood, currys

and alikes.. but I know that thaipeople are really picky with their food and

they would never be 100% satisfied with a farang womans food! So is

it better to leave it alone and just give fruit and sweets, cause I sure dont

want to give beers so our house end up beeing a drunken club!?

haha.. the problem of the day! xx