Dearest Redneck Son

[alvino]

Dearest Redneck Son,

I'm writing this slow because I know you can't

read fast.

We don't live where we did when you left home. Your

dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen

within 20 miles of your home, so we moved.

I won't be able to send you the address because the last

West Virginia family that lived here took the house

numbers when they moved so they wouldn't have to

change their address.

This place is really nice. It even has a washing

machine. I'm not sure about it. I put a load of

clothes in and pulled the chain. We haven't seen

them since.

The weather isn't bad here. It only rained twice

last week... the first time for three days and the

second time for four days.

About that coat you wanted me to send... your Uncle

Billy Bob said it would be too heavy to send in the

mail with the buttons on, so we cut them off and put

them in the pockets.

Bubba locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were

really worried because it took him two hours to get

me and your father out.

Your sister had a baby this morning, but I haven't

found out what it is yet so I don't know if you are

an aunt or an uncle. The baby looks just like your

brother.

Uncle Bobby Ray fell into a whiskey vat last week.

Some men tried to pull him out but he fought them

off and drowned. We had him cremated. He burned

for three days.

Three of your friends went off the bridge in a

pickup truck. Butch was driving. He rolled down

the window and swam to safety. Your other two

friends were in the back. They drowned because they

couldn't get the tailgate down.

There isn't much more news at this time. Nothing

much out of the normal has happened.

Your favorite aunt,

Mom

[redrus]

Daaaammm, foool, thats almooohst funny.....! (in a redneck accent )

redrus

[suegha]

We used to tell this joke about an Irish mother writing to her son. It's still funny though...

[Koratbound]

THis is definitely a very old joke. But is still funny.

I can relate to this better than most as I grew up in the southern part of the United States and speak with a bit of southern drawl myself.

KB