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Posted

Just got this from 'Edd':

A father entered his daughter's bedroom and saw a letter on the bed.

With the worst premonition he read it with trembling hands.

Dear Mum and Dad,

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm telling you that I've eloped

with my new boyfriend. I've found real love and he is so nice, especially

with all his piercings, scars, tattoos, and his big motorcycle. But it is

not only that, I'm pregnant and Ahmed said that we will be very happy in

his trailer in the woods. He wants to have many more children with me and

that is one of my dreams.

I've learned that marijuana doesn't hurt anyone and we'll be growing it

for us and his friends. They're the ones providing us with all the cocaine

and ecstasy we could ever want.

In the meantime, we'll pray for science to find the AIDS cure so Ahmed

gets better. He deserves it.

Don't worry about money, Ahmed has arranged for me

to be in films that his friends Leroy and Jamal make in their basement.

Apparently I can earn $50 a scene and I get a $50 bonus if there are more

than three men in the scene, and an extra $100 if they use a horse.

Don't worry Mum, now I'm 15 years old I know how to take care of myself.

Someday I'll visit you and Dad so that you can meet your grandchildren.

Your loving daughter, Aimee

P.S Dad, it's not true, I'm at a neighbours house. I just wanted to show

you that there are worse things in life than denting the car.

Sorry about your BMW.

Diane x.

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