Nasty Us Customs Acttitude

[Guest The Judge]

Gather round the fire now, kids.  My anecdotal story was in Hawaii, way back before 911, when the pudgy customs guy, having glossed over my exploded bottle of Astroglide and 50+ left over rubbers, had finally managed to empty my entire suitcase.

Huski you think that's good, you should read his book. Bloody ######.

Come on Minute..give them the address you little tease.

[the gentleman]

So, do you like sandwich? And this is my 70th post...

Love a sandwich LovelyCutie, but I must be assured that, if Im the filling, that both pieces of bread are the same sex as you

[elsie]

I guessed so!

Ok Ok.. sorry everyone. A bit off the subject.

[the gentleman]

although off topic my dear, it goes with out saying - more fun in a sandwich than any customs point in the world!

[elsie]

So, now we are going to discuss.. errm.. a sandwich? It's gonna be looooonger than the Pie thread.

[the gentleman]

So, now we are going to discuss.. errm.. a sandwich? It's gonna be looooonger than the Pie thread.

I see ya point Kin sandwit dee qua - mai uan, chai mai jar?

pom by nung doo tv - mar eek prung nee, na krap - sawadee

[Georgie-Porgie]

Oh, did I mention that I am often mistakenly taken for being an Iraqi, and when I have a meal at the local Iranian restaurants, the waiters try to speak to me in Farsi. That couldn't have anything with the rude treatment I often receive, could it?

Are you really Noam Chomsky?

[elsie]

Have fun na ka.

khui kan eek tee prung nee na ka. sawadee ka.

[MinutePigglet]

_____________________

I never said I wasn't a pig. 

She loves me, na ha!

[elsie]

She loves me, na ha!

Yeah, right. I don't fancy a pig.

[MinutePigglet]

Oh dear, here he goes again. This guy is always good for a laugh, isn't he?

Probably he is actually posting in a clever parady of those dim-witted Europeans who can turn nearly any subject into an angry rant against Americans, or maybe he actually is...nah, this rubbish couldn't be for real.

Two out of the three highest ranking diplomats at the US Embassy are married to Asian women as well as countless lower ranking diplomats. But, come to think of it, maybe it's just some kind of weird manifestitation of their 'racist hate'.......

I have family members living in the USA and have also friends who are holding USA-nationality. This thread is called *nasty US Customs Attitude* and was started obviously by an US citizen, and it should be possible for me to post my opinion there, too.

I am not an overall *American Basher*, but critical about this and that - you can read all about on my own home-pages. Also my posting in this thread is not an angry rant.....

I said, immigration rules are unusual strict for foreign wives, who like to marry an American man - (includes my own daughter)

I said, there are no visas of personal invitations, as we use them to have in Japan and in Europe for people we like to invite. (includes my own daughter and visitors we welcome from other Asian countries here in my home in Japan)

I said, there are feminists and American Asians, who hatefully oppose any immigration of Asian women into the US and who attack any white male, who has an Asian wife. (just read some of my e-mail I am receiving!)

and so on....

I think, these are some reasons why somebody started this thread called *nasty US Customs Attitude*

and as it must result in some unusual checks at the US customs.

Yes, this is my opinion....

http://www2.gol.com/users/johann

http://www2.gol.com/users/johann/g/america.htm

and other linked pages.

To Mr. OldAsiaHand:

I am well accustomed to posters like you. Unlike you however, I do not see any reason to stay in hiding. My identity is no secret and I stay to my opinion.

Always when people like you are showing up, they do their best, to stay in hiding and to avoid any clear discussion about the subject, but accusing the others....

Who are you?

On my own homepages there is a messageboard, a link to a discussion forum of my German friend, and a guest book and a reference to my e-mail.

We can discuss it out there anytime (but not here in this forum, this is not the place for it) but when you show up next time for discussion with me, then please sign with your real name.

Johann

Maybe you should change your name...

Hmm... let me see: Take out the "oha" and thrown in an "aw". Yes, that's it.

YAWN...

I'm sleepy now. You?

GET OVER IT! or shave... one of the two...

"BEARDED CLAM!"

Who said that? Jeez! Sorry. Hey, quiet under there!

Let me put it to you this way...

If you got a visa, you'll get in. Nasty or not. Sure, they might take away your 220 volt electronic butt plug even if you claim that it's an antique; but for the most part. What the heck are you cryin' about?

{looking for more beer}

[Yohan]

YAWN...

I'm sleepy now.  You?  .........

.....

Let me put it to you this way...

If you got a visa, you'll get in.  Nasty or not.........

{looking for more beer}

I agree.

Why to care about that all...............

Time waste......You are right!

Btw, for my short trips I do not need a visa for entering the United States.

There are other interesting subjects to talk about..... sunny beach or bar-girls for example.........

Your advice is a good advice.

Thank you again,

Johann

[the gentleman]

_____________________

I never said I wasn't a pig.  

She loves me, na ha!

you are a quality bloke! Get into him Doc!

[Boon Mee]

All of these types of experiences are anecdotal, but I concur that US customs officials are very capable of being extremely rude to incoming US citizens who have been to countries on their red flag lists. Thailand is definitely high on their list.

I always enter the US in San Francisco, and about half the time it is unpleasant. The questioners are usually very sarcastic in tone when asking for details about the trip. They sometimes want to know the exact destinations in Thailand. Once when asked whether my trip was business or pleasure, and I replied vacation, the official replied "so you were on vacation, were you?" and then sent me for a complete luggage search. In my case, I have almost come to expect semi abusive treatment, so it might be true that the officials can smell the fear, and respond to it.

It is my impression that you are more likely to be hassled in San Francisco if you are ending your trip in San Francisco. Don't know if this applies to other entry points. If they see you have a tight flight connection, I think they are less likely to bother you.

Over the years, however, I have come to these conclusions, and even picked up a few tricks that seem to reduce the chance of rude treatment:

1. Don't dress too conservatively. This is counterintutive, I know. It can look like you are hiding something if you look too straight laced. I have noticed folks dressed like they are still on vacation (tropical shirts, sandals) are usually left alone.

2. If asked for specific destinations, do not say Pattaya or Chiang Mai (associated with trekking and drugs) even if you were there. Phuket and Bangkok are fine. My favorite trick is to mention places they haven't heard of, Hua Hin is a real winner.

3. Take in some processed food item that is legal to bring and then mark YES on the bringing in food item. Durian cake in plastic is excellent for this. This guarantees that you will be questioned, but the focus will be on the food, and they will inspect the processed food, and be distracted by your honesty, and most likely there will be no other questions. However, your bags will be scanned, so if you are looking for the big win (an easy fast walk outta there) this ploy is out.

4. Being a single male traveller is a red flag. Sometimes they will ask if you were travelling alone. They want to hear that you were with another farang. When I am travelling with another farang, they are always on another flight to another city, so saying that can be effective too. If asked, always say you were NOT travelling alone.

5. Complexity is your friend sometimes. These guys need to make spot decisions. Complexity is not something they want to deal with. Recently, I had a very true, very complex story about the details of my trip, and I started to tell the truth of it, the guys eyes glazed over, and he waved me through.

6. It is better to tell the truth if the truth is something they like to hear. Some people are better liars than others, and they are trained to spot nervous liars. However, if the truth is damaging (like you were on a two week hill tribe trek), by all means LIE!

7. If you do feel fear about going through customs and/or sweat easily, try this trick. Think of something you fear MORE than customs officials. An open fanged king cobra is a good bet.

Clearly, there is no sure thing. I totally disagree that smiling is always the answer. There are so many factors that go into these spot judgements, and don't kid yourself that age and ethnicity are not a factor too.

I have a funny experience with the last time I was subject to a complete luggage search. The inspector was most interested in looking at the BOOKS in my luggage. I think they are trained to make assumptions about people based on their reading material. I had two books. One was the Dalai Lama's Art of Happiness. The look on the inspectors face when he saw that book was priceless. He was clearly an unsophisticated sort, and was tripping out on the funny looking monk in robes on the cover. I also had an English language politically oriented novel that was translated from Spanish. The inspector flipped through the pages several times, and then made this comment, in an a semi accusatory tone. "So you speak Spanish?" "No," I replied, the book is an English language book. Real bright folks we have doing these jobs.

Happy travelling!

Thiquila~,

If I had to deal w/all the steps you outlined everytime I went thru US Customs, I KNOW what I'd be doing for a living!

"Comin' into Los Angeles - Bringin' in a Couple of Keys...Don't touch my bags if you please Mr. Customs Man"...

A clear-conscience is a wonderful thing...

Boon Mee