Thai Girls Feel Threatened By Farang Girls?

[LaraC]

there are good and bad girls from everywhere, dont judge them because you had a bad experience with a few.

just as there are good and bad guys from everywhere too. Yet some guys are judging all male gender as incapable of refraining from cheating, just because they lack the ability or willpower or integrity themselves.

Small mindedness really.

[Yooyung]

Clarification - Many farang men who thought they had a meaningful relationship with a bar girl they met - end up disappointed or broke or both. If you are looking for love, don't try to find it at a bar full of loose women (be they Thai or whatever Nationality) because love ain't present there. If you want to enter into a relationship with a Thai woman, learn their language and their culture. Problem is most farang are too lazy to even try and end up hitting on the easy targets - like those women at the bars who speak a bit of English.

I believe that very few Farangs have had real meaningful relationships with Thai Girls that are NOT Bar girls. Please be more specific about the Thai Girls you are referring to - so as not to cause misunderstanding.

Does that then mean you believe that most Farangs have real meaningful relationships with Thai Bar girls?

That just doesn't seem right

Absolutely right. I'd say the majority of blokes I met over there got shafted because of this very reason. One bloke I know attempted to get married twice, both to rather dubious women. I met them both, they both spoke pigeon english, knew he didnt understand a word of Thai and said "thankyou very much' to the dowry money he gave BEFORE the wedding and then went on their merry ways. When I asked him why he didnt learn Thai to get some idea of what was going on around him his answer was "I dont want to learn the stoopid ***** language". So, he is basically stuck after living in Thailand for well over a decade with the only option of finding women that can speak reasonable english...and let me tell you with this guys attitude to Thai women he aint got a snow flakes chance in hell of hooking up with any self respecting type.

Is it possible to find love with a bar girl? Possibly, but if I were a betting man I wouldnt like the odds....

Anyway, werent we taking about farang women and their hunky, faithful farang boyfriends bobbing up and down in their insulated bubble that is well and truley off limits to Thai women? Yes, thats right...why only the other day I overheard a conversation between two twenty something Thai women. It went something like this:

Falang woman with falang man off limits yeah?

Yeah, off limits. Falang woman have special power over man, some voodoo **** going on there!

Yeah, If she beautiful, and him handsome it make me sad to, and jealous!

Yeah, me too but off limit nah!

Yeah, you want to eat some gai yang?

Yes, I want.

This is not an isolated incident. I hear this type of conversation regularly at the bus stop where I sell exploding cucumbers. I really dont think the OP has anything to worry about. Her beauty and charms cannot be matched. I think it is safe to summise that Thai women are well and truley threatened by falang women, especially when they also have handsome falang boyfriends. I feel much better knowing it and you should to!

[jackr]

Also, i do notice when i go to a club i get a lot of up/down stares from the women..it doesnt feel friendly,

Xenophobia, but also (for many) because you're a fiscal threat.

[2unique]

I know i have not cheated so its a safe bet for me.

Generation has nothing to do with it either, im only 37.

Agree for the most part but could be a contributing factor

Edited February 14, 2013 by 2unique

[TommoPhysicist]

I never had the energy to cheat.

[rene123]

I never had the energy to cheat.

That statement is true in more ways than one, Tommo. If a wife keeps her man satisfied on a continual basis he is less likely to stray. I sometimes wonder if that was my problem with my ex. It's too easy to get occupied with other things and not put it into perspective with your spouse. It's when a man is "cut off" from his natural wants that he is most susceptible to another woman with the morals of an alley cat.

[Morakot]

Might be true.

Edited February 14, 2013 by Morakot

[GrantSmith]

Surely this all has to be situational socioeconomics.

Naturally a 'bar girl' is going to be threatened by a female farang in a bar with a male ferang - you've potentially cost her money by being with him in the bar.

At the other end of the spectrum, you have Thai women who come from "financially stable" families who could not care less about a female farang (pretty or otherwise) let alone feel threatened by one.

Edited February 14, 2013 by GrantSmith

[Berkshire]

If a wife keeps her man satisfied on a continual basis he is less likely to stray.

Unfortunately, that statement isn't true in some cases. Some guys are predisposed to cheating because they simply enjoy being with someone different. And the woman he cheats with doesn't even have to be someone more attractive or desirable--just different. Hugh Grant comes to mind. Accessibility is also a big deterrent--or in the case of Thailand, the opposite.

[Berkshire]

I know i have not cheated so its a safe bet for me.

Generation has nothing to do with it either, im only 37.

I've met quite a few westerners who would insist adamantly that they've never cheated and never will. Then after a few years in Thailand, they stray.

So when someone mentions on an anonymous forum that they've never cheated and never will...I tend to take with a grain of salt.

[Trembly]

I don't understand why people who are clearly not ready to be monogamous insist on 'committing' to long term relationships, in a country / culture where there is such a thing as gik(s).

Edited February 14, 2013 by Trembly

[SteeleJoe]

I never had the energy to cheat.

That statement is true in more ways than one, Tommo. If a wife keeps her man satisfied on a continual basis he is less likely to stray. I sometimes wonder if that was my problem with my ex. It's too easy to get occupied with other things and not put it into perspective with your spouse. It's when a man is "cut off" from his natural wants that he is most susceptible to another woman with the morals of an alley cat.

I'm afraid you're lack of testosterone is not allowing to understand just how low the male species can be. Studies have shown that there isn't as much truth to what you say, as you might like to think. Even a man with a beautiful woman who satisfies his every sexual desire as much as he wants is by no means immune from the temptation (and I speak from past experience of my own and others) because it comes down to a (arguably biologically driven) powerful desire for VARIETY. In Thailand, where such a "need" is so easily satisfied...I'm not making any excuses - nor should you; it's NOT the woman's fault EVER. A man (or woman) has a choice: be in a committed relationship and honor that commitment, be in a committed relationship and not honor it, or not get into/get out of committed relationship.

I'm not speaking from any moral high ground here but it's that simple: everyone is responsible for their own actions and their own failures of character.

Sent from my iPad using ThaiVisa ap

[SteeleJoe]

If a wife keeps her man satisfied on a continual basis he is less likely to stray.

Unfortunately, that statement isn't true in some cases. Some guys are predisposed to cheating because they simply enjoy being with someone different. And the woman he cheats with doesn't even have to be someone more attractive or desirable--just different. Hugh Grant comes to mind. Accessibility is also a big deterrent--or in the case of Thailand, the opposite.

Didn't see this when I wrote mine. Spot on. But I think it's probably most or virtually all that are "predisposed" - just that some of them, for various reasons, don't succumb.

Sent from my iPad using ThaiVisa ap

[muythai2013]

I know i have not cheated so its a safe bet for me.

Generation has nothing to do with it either, im only 37.

I've met quite a few westerners who would insist adamantly that they've never cheated and never will. Then after a few years in Thailand, they stray.

So when someone mentions on an anonymous forum that they've never cheated and never will...I tend to take with a grain of salt.

and i should take your statements with anything more then a grain of salt.

I have been around the country long enough to be lured in and it has not even looked like happening.

I have mentioned it and i dont like to harp on it but i was a model before, I do get quite a bit of attention, please dont think i am bragging but it is highly relevant to the conversation.

I never have been even remotely close to even thinking about cheating.

[Berkshire]

I know i have not cheated so its a safe bet for me.

Generation has nothing to do with it either, im only 37.

I've met quite a few westerners who would insist adamantly that they've never cheated and never will. Then after a few years in Thailand, they stray.

So when someone mentions on an anonymous forum that they've never cheated and never will...I tend to take with a grain of salt.

and i should take your statements with anything more then a grain of salt.

I have been around the country long enough to be lured in and it has not even looked like happening.

I have mentioned it and i dont like to harp on it but i was a model before, I do get quite a bit of attention, please dont think i am bragging but it is highly relevant to the conversation.

I never have been even remotely close to even thinking about cheating.

More power to you, then. The problem with Thailand is the easy access and many men simply succumb. Not all, but many. I try not to be overly judgmental because, in fact, many of these guys are my friends. They're true blue in all other aspects of their lives. But once they've tasted the forbidden fruit...man, in Thailand, they're toast.

[phuturatica]

I'd go as far as to say not all men have cheated as I know members of that whole older generation who would find the idea abhorrent.

Our generation and the next have a lot more sexual freedom but (in my view) a large proportion seem to lack the sexual responsibility and/or sexual maturity to deal with it.

Couple that with what constitutes cheating for our sexually unconstrained up and comers - who would scoff at heavy petting up to a blowjob being considered cheating whereas my grandparents would consider themselves absolute sluts for going to the grocery store with someone else.

If you do something that you have to hide from or couldn't tell your partner, then that's a form of cheating but I would still wager that there are guys out there that haven't cheated and are open and transparent. Then you get into the whole world of swinging, open relationships etc that come with another whole set of rules as to what constitutes cheating...

yup... from a vanilla viewpoint I'd take that bet that not all men have cheated...

I see what you're saying...

Let's hope I'm with one of the rare few who don't have any intention of cheating then.

[forumuser10]

I don't think farang people all look the same to Thai people but they obviously categorize us into the "farangs" which maybe makes you feel like you're being referred to as the same as every other farang... But I don't think we're all the same.

You don´t think we are all the same, but Thais in general think all white people are the same, we are all just farang to them, unfortunately.

And many of us, actually seem to like the idea of grouping ourselves together by calling ourselves farang all the time. I think it is very counterproductive.

We love to call ourselves farang, so I guess we get what we deserve. Personally I think it is a very stupid word, even though I know Thais do not mean anything negative when they call us that,

[forumuser10]

Lol, how do I know you spend your time in bars. Correct, to bargirls looks matter very little. However, regular Thais can easily tell if a farang is good looking or not

No, not at all. You are fooling yourself. To them, you are first and foremost Farang, that is the reason why we are never gonna be a part of Thailand. Because Thais, and we, ourselves, when we are here, make a big point of always make sure we call ourselves Farang.

Edited February 14, 2013 by forumuser10

[chiangmaikelly]

Lol, how do I know you spend your time in bars. Correct, to bargirls looks matter very little. However, regular Thais can easily tell if a farang is good looking or not

No, not at all. You are fooling yourself. To them, you are first and foremost Farang, that is the reason why we are never gonna be a part of Thailand. Because Thais, and we, ourselves, when we are here, make a big point of always make sure we call ourselves Farang.

No one who lives here and has a Thai woman, business and family would believe the above.

[Berkshire]

We love to call ourselves farang, so I guess we get what we deserve. Personally I think it is a very stupid word, even though I know Thais do not mean anything negative when they call us that,

Would you prefer westerner? Caucasian? Of course, my next question would be, what the heck is the difference? You need to pick and choose your battles, and this one was lost a long time ago. Honestly, if I was in polite conversation and happen to mention the word "farang" and some knucklehead was to tell me not to use that word because it's offensive, I might get the urge to slap said knucklehead upside his noggin. Enough already.

[forumuser10]

Well, don't flatter yourself, or your boyfriend too much, about being more good looking than some other white skin people.

To Thais, we all look the same.

They DO NOT view, what we would view as a good looking guy in the west better looking than the average white skinned person. They do VERY SELDOM make any difference.

You're joking ?

No. The first few years I lived here, I was very surprised what the Thai girl would sometimes go for, and I began to look for certain patterns in what kind of looks the thais would prefer. After a while, after seeing NO pattern (not talking about the money aspect here), I realize they don't usually have a specific taste. A white skinned person is just that, a white skinned person.

As long as you are not too dark, or too fat, or too old, we ALL LOOK THE SAME to most Thais.

could it possibly be that different girls have different tastes and some go for personality, charm and/or a good heart?

I mean a random selection of girls liking random types of men = all white men look alike?!?

I am not talking about the girls who likes a guy for his good heart, or if he is rich, I am talking about how Thai perceive us.

To them we are first and foremost, Farang, white skin.

That is the single most dominant factor how they judge us.

Only secondary becomes details such as facial features, and important traits such as personality, and behaviour.

We enhance this focus on our skin color by constantly calling ourselves farang as well.

Yes, all white man look the same, to most thais, after all, we are just Farang

Edited February 14, 2013 by forumuser10

[forumuser10]

Would you prefer westerner? Caucasian?

I would prefer to be called by my name, or at least by my nationality, westerner, or foreigner, those are all more relevant than constantly being called white skin, farang, long nose, etc.

Edited February 14, 2013 by forumuser10

[Trembly]

Here we go again . . .

[Berkshire]

Would you prefer westerner? Caucasian?

I would prefer to be called by my name, or at least by my nationality, westerner, or foreigner, those are all more relevant than constantly being called white skin, farang, long nose, etc.

If I knew your name, I would call you by your name...as would most Thais. Hello Mr. forumuser. How are you Mr. forumuser? That's an interesting accent, Mr. forumuser. And so on. But that's not the point. We use the word "farang" interchangeably in normal conversation and it's never meant in a derogatory way. It just seems to me that some expats try to find a reason to attack the Thais, even for something as innocuous as the use of their own language. Again, pick and choose your battles.

[forumuser10]

Would you prefer westerner? Caucasian?

I would prefer to be called by my name, or at least by my nationality, westerner, or foreigner, those are all more relevant than constantly being called white skin, farang, long nose, etc.

If I knew your name, I would call you by your name...as would most Thais. Hello Mr. forumuser. How are you Mr. forumuser? That's an interesting accent, Mr. forumuser. And so on. But that's not the point. We use the word "farang" interchangeably in normal conversation and it's never meant in a derogatory way. It just seems to me that some expats try to find a reason to attack the Thais, even for something as innocuous as the use of their own language. Again, pick and choose your battles.

As I said in the other post:

"We love to call ourselves farang, so I guess we get what we deserve. Personally I think it is a very stupid word, even though I know Thais do not mean anything negative when they call us that"

I don´t bash Thais, I bash ourselves for being ignorant.

[SteeleJoe]

I don´t bash Thais, I bash ourselves for being ignorant.

Speak for yourself...oh wait, you already have.

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[TommoPhysicist]

If I knew your name, I would call you by your name...as would most Thais. Hello Mr. forumuser. How are you Mr. forumuser? That's an interesting accent, Mr. forumuser. And so on. But that's not the point. We use the word "farang" interchangeably in normal conversation and it's never meant in a derogatory way. It just seems to me that some expats try to find a reason to attack the Thais, even for something as innocuous as the use of their own language. Again, pick and choose your battles.

I have nothing but contempt for racists, no matter the colour of their skin.

[frankold]

The reason is quite simple.

Thai girls stereotype white guys living over here as being here for 1 or 2 reasons. 1 would be an attraction to asian women the other reasons vary I guess. When he says he has a white bird, they take offence to that like he thinks there is something wrong with asian women, this being asia afterall.

Tell ya bf to tell the girls he has a Korean or Japansese gf. See what their reaction is to that. There will likely be a lot of hair flicking, and she will end up asking him if he thinks she is beautiful and start wittering on about how pretty Korean and Japanese women are....

[2unique]

I'd go as far as to say not all men have cheated as I know members of that whole older generation who would find the idea abhorrent.

Our generation and the next have a lot more sexual freedom but (in my view) a large proportion seem to lack the sexual responsibility and/or sexual maturity to deal with it.

Couple that with what constitutes cheating for our sexually unconstrained up and comers - who would scoff at heavy petting up to a blowjob being considered cheating whereas my grandparents would consider themselves absolute sluts for going to the grocery store with someone else.

If you do something that you have to hide from or couldn't tell your partner, then that's a form of cheating but I would still wager that there are guys out there that haven't cheated and are open and transparent. Then you get into the whole world of swinging, open relationships etc that come with another whole set of rules as to what constitutes cheating...

yup... from a vanilla viewpoint I'd take that bet that not all men have cheated...

I see what you're saying...

Let's hope I'm with one of the rare few who don't have any intention of cheating then.

We all hope for that. I feel sorry for those that destroy what they have because they can't accept/believe they might just have a good one.

All one can do is respect your partner, the relationship and above all respect yourself - respect and trust are somewhat intertwined and we all know the love part is easy

[Berkshire]

If I knew your name, I would call you by your name...as would most Thais. Hello Mr. forumuser. How are you Mr. forumuser? That's an interesting accent, Mr. forumuser. And so on. But that's not the point. We use the word "farang" interchangeably in normal conversation and it's never meant in a derogatory way. It just seems to me that some expats try to find a reason to attack the Thais, even for something as innocuous as the use of their own language. Again, pick and choose your battles.

I have nothing but contempt for racists, no matter the colour of their skin.

I share your contempt regarding racists. Now, I hope we haven't started another long, drawn-out pissing contest regarding the definition of what a racist is.