Looking for a place t6o crash for a week or so. Near the action Want rto rent a cool car and pick up some chics. Mony no problem, I got lots from my dad. I need to no were too stay, and how to git their. I just got in to Phuket this today and near airport for now.

Any 1 want to hookup for a beer? I by first ronde.

Cheers

CK

　

Please double check that your travel insurance is valid.

Another lamb to the slaughter. :)

Patong, Bangla Road. Filled with ladies just for you.

I recommend any of the soi bars, filled with virginal "chics"

For a twist, try the Paradise section bars. I'm sure you will meet someone just like you.

for you older people this isnt a joke. I have a few members of my family that are 16-19(and therefore know even younger kids themselves) and western kids today are mostly like this. Id say around 70-80% of them

Edited February 23, 201313 yr by bearpolar

Oh boy.. then I guess we'll have to share some real information how to act in Phuket. To ensure that OP will not end up being in Darwin awards.

The new trend here is not have wheels or car as some lame people call it. Real hipsters and young people in general use ponies to pick up the chicks. There are few pony rental shops in Patong, just ask around and someone will eventually let you know where to rent your own one. As you are just visiting Phuket, it's not advisable to purchase one, even if you'll probably will get very good offers.

If you are not familiar with the pony business, it's good to remember that the pony maintenance will require an effort. You'll better take care of this even before you'll rent one. Once again, just ask the advice from people you meet at Bangla road - maybe at the bars as those hard working girls seems to know everything what is happening around.

Happy rides!

Grab a taxi. Head to Bangla. Report results in the morning please.

There are many dangers in Phuket, which you should be aware of.

One of these are the lanterns, you know, the candles flying in to the night sky, which are often released from the beaches.

Once you have got your pony.. and probably got a chick along, you'll might go and have a nice romantic walk along the beach. Pheromones are filling the air and life is good! The chick of your dreams sees an lantern seller and asks if you would like to send one together to the sky. Sounds good when you are in the mood, doesn't it? There is likely a person who will take an picture while you do this together.

This is real an present danger! Sending the lantern together is not just a nice romantic act here, it actually bounds you together for life. Yes, you are officially married to the person who you send the candle of love to the sky! The picture can be used as an evidence in the next day at the provincial headquarters.

Just think of the hundreds of friends who have done this act together and got married. How to explain this to the mother and father back home.. not to mention all the Facebook friends!

Obviously the aim of the young man is to have a bit.. who am I kidding.. a lot of cha cha!

It's good to remember that the chicks who are so good at the customer services might have some STD's. Therefore it's important to get an protection for the great light saber.

To do this all you have to do is to walk to the nearest 7-11 shop and demand with a loud voice XXXL sized condoms, remember to tell everybody that the smaller sized are just too tight for you. Those are the ones which are 56mm forwards in case you come from the country which uses imperial measurements, so that you don't have to try to fit those in public. After all that would be embarrassing, this is an modest country which is something not to forget.

While paying for the 12 rubbers, lick your eyebrow with you tongue for an few times, just like Gene Simmons would do. The chicks get really hot when they see that happen.

The night is still young and so are you. You might not have the patience of the water buffalo, and it does not matter. I'll promise you'll get what you wanted at end of the night. Have you ever heard of the high meter club? Have you really experienced Phuket and seen the best parts of the island? All of these can be done in a single tuk-tuk ride to Phromthep cape!

Grap your chick and take the nearest tuk-tuk. The true adventure of Amazing Asia is waiting to happen.

Tell the driver to take you to see the southernmost part of Phuket, which is also known by all the Thais as that's one of the places which weather information is announced in the national radio. This will blow her mind. You truly know your holiday destination. Think about it, it's the perfect way to really get to know your new partner.

The route goes from Patong to Kata and all the way up to the steep hills. This is the place to make your move. Get closer and get your first base. This is what experienced Thai travelers mean when they talk about high meter club in Phuket. You have already reached it on your first vacation! There will be many people who will envy your success, do send an tweet about it.

Do not go any further as these kind of things are not the same as back in home. Go slowly and master your act. This is an critical moment not to blow the whole thing up.

When you reach to the cape, she is already yours. It's time to head back to the hotel - together, for sure.

At the hotel pay the fee to the tuk-tuk driver. He is a poor villager, so show your power and give him a handsome tip, maybe even double the asked fee. This will show how generous you are. The face value is very important here.

The sun rises again. You wake up with an incoming hangover, but you don't really care. The night was great! You got you cha cha! and the smile comes naturally. Good, good time. She looks great in her night dress. How an earth did managed to prepare to wake up like this in the morning. She must be really smart.

After the alcohol burns out, you might wonder why the fingertips does have a different smell you got used to and why you back hurts. Well, it's time for the breakfast anyway. You are simply too exited to recall the memories of the last night to sleep again. There are few blackouts after hopping to the tuk-tuk, but you'll know she will tell those to you.

She is still sleeping and you'll be happy to organize the breakfast. Dress up and go to the 7-11, which is conveniently just behind the corner of your hotel. Couple of coffees, bums and the pancakes from the seller in the front of the 7-11. Thailand is such an great place and have everything in correct places!

Back in the room she is still snoring. How sweet is that. You'll go to her, lean next to her. You feel so warm and so good. It's like heaven. The little devil in you together with the incoming hangover calls to have some morning fun.

Sliding your fingers underneath her nightdress, there is something weird! She is not exactly she, is she? <deleted> is going on?!!

The first reaction is to yell out loud, demand an explanation and kick her or now he out of the hotel room. Then you remember! You are in Thailand and this is part of the unexpected experience of the east.

You have been told that these kind of things might sometimes happen while traveling and living the life for the fullest. An experience not to be repeated and not to be told to the pinterest friends, ever.

The sun is up again. Shim is gone. Good time to go to the beach and get some tan. In the evening need to find a new pony to start a new adventure. What an life!

The End. Repeat.

Edited February 23, 201313 yr by Guest

Is Wat Up the one at the top going over Patong hill? Or am I missing something here... ?

Oh dear, really?

Is this the best we can do today?

//CLOSED//