Not to be controversial, but with the legends of Thai men (actually I take that back, it should say ALL men) being compulsive cheaters, have you ladies ever tried or think trying to have your man followed by a PI (Private Investigator) ?

If yes what was your experience with the service and did you feel better after finding the truth about your man ? and was it expensive ? any recommendations for a PI service ?

What kind of advice would you give to a woman looking for that kind of service ? Was it really worth it ?

I need to know fast

Edited March 7, 200620 yr by Butterfly

Well, after 17 years of living with a Thai man I can say my husband has never cheated and many of the Thai men I know do not cheat. So, I'd have to say that you are incorrect in stating that ALL Thai men are cheaters. Many, but certainly not all.

Believe it or not, I trust my husband and certainly know the kind of person he is after all these years. I suggest that anyone who feels the need of these kinds of services has either made some foolish choices or has serious trust issues.

As I have never had any need for anyone's services I couldn't even begin to help you with such a request. Where are such services needed and why can't the person interested just contact any PI service?

Use the search forum in the general section and you will find a few contacts, I am sure.

WHAT??

girls can hire private investigators??

I was wondering why my TGF was asking what was the names of the hotels i was staying at when i was in Koh Samui after telling her i was changing hotels every night...hmmmmm

But im the most loyal man on earth. maybe not in my teens but in my 20's i am

Use the search forum in the general section and you will find a few contacts, I am sure.

The Search function on this forum doesn't work when the words are too short or too generic.

I am surprised that no one has tried the PI service. I understand that going that far means there are serious issues in the relationship, but for those who have broke up with Thai men, would the use of such service have made you feel better if you suspected something ? or is finding out the hard way a better option ? I know someone who is thinking of using this service and I am trying to convince her not to (may it be for costs or other reasons)

Investigate isn't too short of a word, is it?

Butterfly, I live on a small island that up until a few years ago was populated entirely by locals. My husband is local, his parents are local, all 4 of his grandparents were local as are all 20 odd so of his aunts and uncles and his 41 first cousins. Anything I want to know about my husband I can certainly find out faster than any PI could ever do.

Drawbacks to hiring someone to follow a Thai man around? Well, if he is the wrong sort of guy to be following I imagine death or maiming could be one major drawback. Even if he isn't that sort of guy it could certainly backfire in a most unpleasant way.

I think if you have to hire a PI in the first place then you already know your relationship is doomed. If there is no trust then, for me at least, thats the whole relationship down the drain, As for having a guy followed after we have broken up, for what? Once I finish with a guy I move on pretty quickly emotionally, so what he is or was doing wouldn't bother me to find out.

If I ever feel the need to start snooping on my husband then I will know he is up to something as he is so predicable & has little interest outside of the home that any change in his normal routine would start alarm bells ringing.

But as I was told by him the other day that I was everything & without me what would be the point for his life (he doesn't say much but when he does it's always great ones like this ) I hopefully don't need to worry quite yet.

Butterfly, I would tell your friend, if she has doubts, confront him on them.

Too many women push their problems about relationships to the back of their minds instead of taking the initiative & getting the issues out in the open. Gut feeling, womens intuition, call it what you like, I always follow mine & if I have a problem with my man confront it head on.

If she can be honest with herself & not make excuses, can she really explain away the things that are making her doubt him. If she can't then the likelyhood is, he's up to something, maybe not cheating but maybe something that needs to be confronted & resolved?

what do these PI wear?? do they have a uniform??

Asif you wouldnt notice some dude following you around with a camera jumping behind bushes everytime you turn around??

Butterfly, I would tell your friend, if she has doubts, confront him on them.

Too many women push their problems about relationships to the back of their minds instead of taking the initiative & getting the issues out in the open. Gut feeling, womens intuition, call it what you like, I always follow mine & if I have a problem with my man confront it head on.

If she can be honest with herself & not make excuses, can she really explain away the things that are making her doubt him. If she can't then the likelyhood is, he's up to something, maybe not cheating but maybe something that needs to be confronted & resolved?

I think that's the heart of the problem. She tried but he won't confront her and complain instead about her being "confrontotionial" or not understanding him. She just want to catch him red handed because she can't find any justification to break up with him. Always hoping he will change. From what she told me, I see all the red flags of him having another girlfriend. It's hopeless. She doesn't want to believe it unless she sees evidence. For me there are plenty of evidence already from what she told but it seems that some women will not be satisfied until they see it with their own eyes. Of course it will make things worse to see the "physical" evidence.

I know a few females who are always paranoid over there man cheating and see all these imaginary signs and stuff.

Leave the man alone.