What does a foreigner expect from marrying a thai ?

[speedtripler]

A Visa.

lol

I sincerely want to know how - literally how - these ancient zombie threads get resuscitated.

Someone please explain to me, as if I'm five years old. . .

you should know ,youve been banned enough times yet you call your self a "newbie' as recently as the day before yesterday ......lol

[wym]

you call your self a "newbie' as recently as the day before yesterday ......lol

I said I was a noob at creating polls, that was my first.

And I sincerely don't know how people find these old threads, just randomly clicking around or searching deep within the site?

Usually is on a totally unimportant topic that's been recycled twenty times since that thread was last alive.

[Robininbkk]

I expect her to be able to cook, clean and bare me healthy children. Ok now that we've gotten the obvious out of the way. OP said "I expected Love, Loyalty and Sincerity''

Many variables, anyway:

Love... She might or not love you for being well, you know, yourself? She might or might not ''love'' you because of your fat bank account. This is truer when the age gap is wide. Don't think that a 20 something marries a 50+ guy for love, it's unnatural.

Loyalty...Yes, if the age gap is not too wide. a 20 something hot girl will getting hit on all the time. A young girl likes to eat something different sometimes you know.

Sincerity...Really? please ''don't Thai me''.... It's not a negative thing, just don't expect her to tell the truth 100% all the time, more like 40%. The rest is to save her face, your face, someone else's face, or just utter bullshitting.

[FiftyTwo]

OP wrote:

"I expected Love, Loyalty and Sincerity.

You ?"

i think i expected about the same.

but what would you expect from a marriage to someone from your own country, anything different?

honestly, i dont understand the point.

I expected that sort of stuff in the UK, didn't get it.

Now I'm older and wiser, I don't expect anything, and I do get that.

[fish fingers]

If you marry an Isaan thai chances are your money will disappear on her family, if you marry an affluent chinese thai its a different story.

[baneko]

To be part of the family but never a full part. This is the same with Thai in laws not only farangs. To be treated well and fed from morning till night. To respect your family if they are older but maybe not wiser. To expect organised chaos at every outing. Also to be very happy and content

[Loles]

Can I reply?

I am Heavy drinker's wife. I am Thai but the thing is not to 'expect' anything. Just have love.

We married in London 22 years ago and our wedding vows were simple. It was to love and respect each other.

22 years on, we still have that love and respect. It is that easy.

Thank you for reading this.

Patsaporn

(She's right) edit by HD. Just love her for who she is. Don't listen to others. 22 years and she is still my world...

Dear Patsaporn,

Do you have any nice small sister, niece or other relative under 30? (I'm 36)

I just got feeling for marriage to read your lines.

My best wishes and congratulation.

loles

Edited February 6, 2014 by Loles

[Loles]

If you marry an Isaan thai chances are your money will disappear on her family, if you marry an affluent chinese thai its a different story.

Yes man, if you marry with Isaan you can forget your money at all, BUT if you marry with Chinese you can forget your personality ALSO.

[i claudius]

What do i expect ? exactly the same as what i had when i was married to my British wife a normal everyday marriage with its ups and downs ,and after 21 years now ,its what i got.

[Soutpeel]

If you marry an Isaan thai chances are your money will disappear on her family, if you marry an affluent chinese thai its a different story.

Yes man, if you marry with Isaan you can forget your money at all, BUT if you marry with Chinese you can forget your personality ALSO.

The vast majority of farangs couldn't afford marrying into an affluent Thai Chinese family so a stupid comparison

[Scarpolo]

If you marry an Isaan thai chances are your money will disappear on her family, if you marry an affluent chinese thai its a different story.

Yes man, if you marry with Isaan you can forget your money at all, BUT if you marry with Chinese you can forget your personality ALSO.

The vast majority of farangs couldn't afford marrying into an affluent Thai Chinese family so a stupid comparison

My girl is partially chinese, which is probably what attracted me,

they aren't well to do, and wouldnt have homes if my girl didnt own them,

I plan to stay far away from her family,

I did that with my last two wives and I have no need to involve myself with this group either

[TheUsualGarbage]

If you marry an Isaan thai chances are your money will disappear on her family, if you marry an affluent chinese thai its a different story.

Yes man, if you marry with Isaan you can forget your money at all, BUT if you marry with Chinese you can forget your personality ALSO.

The vast majority of farangs couldn't afford marrying into an affluent Thai Chinese family so a stupid comparison

Speak for yourself. Has your wife got tattoos?

[godzilla]

Philosophical conversation, independence, initiative taking ... wait, what was the question again?

[umbanda]

I think you need to eliminate country to get an honest answer...what does a man want when they marry a woman, Thai, Chinese, Antartican etc? If you could distill the answer and put it onto a book, it would be a best seller.

on the darker side I think there is the need for perceived control by the man, ( maybe it is an evolutionary reproductive advantage to be this way) which a Thai woman, to the unwary and uninitiated, provides, though it doesn't necessarily always follow that this is true. I think the more uninhibited/ tease/ sometimes coquettish combination style of the sexual exploits of Thai woman

( compared to western counterparts )is a lure too. There is an an apparent femininity exuded by Thai women that western women rarely exhibit openly for fear of letting down their feminist mothers/sisters, especially when it comes to choosing a mate. I think men find Thai women attractive because the provide what men desire without making them feel guilty for such attractiveness, make them feel manly, make them think they are useful ( true or otherwise) give them a sense of worth (which is not my experience with western women), make them feel sexy and sexual, which similarly I have rarely experienced in the west.

There is a iron hand in an ermine glove that makes Thai women irresistible. thai women don't normally nag, or at least they disguise it with charm and wit. Western woman complain Thai women are so obvious in their approach, but subtlety doesn't work on the average man, not the ones I know well anyhow. So I expect my needs to be fulfilled, but I also fell the need to reciprocate for it to work properly. With a Thai Woman I can feel like a King, a provider, a stud, a bastion of support at the same time as allowing myself to be vulnerable and sensitive and not so much in control. Sometimes it's good to hand over the reigns to your Queen, someone who you trust, who will protect your integrity and your emotions unconditionally.

When you find a Woman like her, Thai or otherwise, like I was lucky enough to do, marry her and never look back

WOW!!! Well put! If I had so good English skills than you, I will write EXACTLY the same...Foreigners treating its Thai wives like slaves, were trying to do or did it with its foreigners wives and girlfriends before. They just got better chances to get away with that here. Blame on them!

[FiftyTwo]

I think you need to eliminate country to get an honest answer...what does a man want when they marry a woman, Thai, Chinese, Antartican etc? If you could distill the answer and put it onto a book, it would be a best seller.

on the darker side I think there is the need for perceived control by the man, ( maybe it is an evolutionary reproductive advantage to be this way) which a Thai woman, to the unwary and uninitiated, provides, though it doesn't necessarily always follow that this is true. I think the more uninhibited/ tease/ sometimes coquettish combination style of the sexual exploits of Thai woman

( compared to western counterparts )is a lure too. There is an an apparent femininity exuded by Thai women that western women rarely exhibit openly for fear of letting down their feminist mothers/sisters, especially when it comes to choosing a mate. I think men find Thai women attractive because the provide what men desire without making them feel guilty for such attractiveness, make them feel manly, make them think they are useful ( true or otherwise) give them a sense of worth (which is not my experience with western women), make them feel sexy and sexual, which similarly I have rarely experienced in the west.

There is a iron hand in an ermine glove that makes Thai women irresistible. thai women don't normally nag, or at least they disguise it with charm and wit. Western woman complain Thai women are so obvious in their approach, but subtlety doesn't work on the average man, not the ones I know well anyhow. So I expect my needs to be fulfilled, but I also fell the need to reciprocate for it to work properly. With a Thai Woman I can feel like a King, a provider, a stud, a bastion of support at the same time as allowing myself to be vulnerable and sensitive and not so much in control. Sometimes it's good to hand over the reigns to your Queen, someone who you trust, who will protect your integrity and your emotions unconditionally.

When you find a Woman like her, Thai or otherwise, like I was lucky enough to do, marry her and never look back

WOW!!! Well put! If I had so good English skills than you, I will write EXACTLY the same...Foreigners treating its Thai wives like slaves, were trying to do or did it with its foreigners wives and girlfriends before. They just got better chances to get away with that here. Blame on them!

How can anyone be so completely wrong.

They nag, they manipulate, they shout, and the foreign men usually end up completely in their control.

Same as in the west, the main difference is your wife in the west never worked in the sex trade.

So it wasn't so easy to get a shag from her.

If your wife never worked the sex trade, you won't get a shag from her here either.

Edited February 9, 2014 by FiftyTwo

[TheUsualGarbage]

How can anyone be so completely wrong.

If your wife never worked the sex trade, you won't get a shag from her here either.

Ironic much.

[wym]

Foreigners treating its Thai wives like slaves, were trying to do or did it with its foreigners wives and girlfriends before. They just got better chances to get away with that here. Blame on them!

Very few foreigners with Thai wives even wear the pants the way a Thai thinks they should, never mind being a "master" of a "slave".

Out of those few (1%) that do properly control their girl, believe me 99% are paying dearly - in a purely financial sense - for the privilege, and the girl is consciously and willingly going along with the deal.

If someone is well paid and can choose to leave at any time, they aren't a slave.

Using this kind of terminology belittles the VERY high degree of real slavery that does still exist, not only in this region but all over the world.

In Thailand it's 99.9999999% perpetrated by Thais, and mostly against their neighbor nationalities and mostly in straight industries like fishing, the sexual aspect is relatively small.

Guys that marry girls who aren't motivated by money can very much confirm their Thai wives aren't the meek submissive type at all, their "payments" are in other than financial ways, IMO unacceptably high but whatever floats your boat. . .

[sdanielmcev]

I wasn't looking for a "Thai" wife or, gf when I met Su. After I did meet her, playing an online game, I started reading about Thai culture. I wound up here and over at stickman's site. Expectations weren't high. That's what the OP asked. I'll answer on another thread if anyone wants to know how it worked out.

[Donnie Brasco]

I think you need to eliminate country to get an honest answer...what does a man want when they marry a woman, Thai, Chinese, Antartican etc? If you could distill the answer and put it onto a book, it would be a best seller.

on the darker side I think there is the need for perceived control by the man, ( maybe it is an evolutionary reproductive advantage to be this way) which a Thai woman, to the unwary and uninitiated, provides, though it doesn't necessarily always follow that this is true. I think the more uninhibited/ tease/ sometimes coquettish combination style of the sexual exploits of Thai woman

( compared to western counterparts )is a lure too. There is an an apparent femininity exuded by Thai women that western women rarely exhibit openly for fear of letting down their feminist mothers/sisters, especially when it comes to choosing a mate. I think men find Thai women attractive because the provide what men desire without making them feel guilty for such attractiveness, make them feel manly, make them think they are useful ( true or otherwise) give them a sense of worth (which is not my experience with western women), make them feel sexy and sexual, which similarly I have rarely experienced in the west.

There is a iron hand in an ermine glove that makes Thai women irresistible. thai women don't normally nag, or at least they disguise it with charm and wit. Western woman complain Thai women are so obvious in their approach, but subtlety doesn't work on the average man, not the ones I know well anyhow. So I expect my needs to be fulfilled, but I also fell the need to reciprocate for it to work properly. With a Thai Woman I can feel like a King, a provider, a stud, a bastion of support at the same time as allowing myself to be vulnerable and sensitive and not so much in control. Sometimes it's good to hand over the reigns to your Queen, someone who you trust, who will protect your integrity and your emotions unconditionally.

When you find a Woman like her, Thai or otherwise, like I was lucky enough to do, marry her and never look back

Hey Doc, your off your rocker.

@mrtellyoustraight

Your reply, to Dr. Robert, who addressed a rather complex issue he saw in the OP was rude, dismissive and contributed absolutely nothing to the conversation.

You did, however manage to convey with crystal clarity that you have little or no little or no regard for another man's attempt to address a point of interest to many of us.

And just for the record, the pretension to which, by your name, you lay claim (that you and your six-word snort have anything to do with truth, logic, imagination, intelligence, enlightenment, clarity, cutting to the chase, straight shooting or anything else approaching adult conversation) is utterly "biogassical".

Who do you think you are, mrtellyoustraight . . . . . . . Wilfred (forking) Brimley ?

"Sometimes, 'fuggedabowdit' just means fuggedabowdit."

Edited February 9, 2014 by Donnie Brasco

[NeverSure]

I'll never get married because my expectations are all negative. I actually have no interest in paying sin sot, then losing a house, a car, a scooter, money "loaned" to relatives and that shiny new Kubota that replaced the buffalo.

Rent everything in Thailand except maybe a car and/or scooter in your own name.

[JLCrab]

Foreigners treating its Thai wives like slaves, were trying to do or did it with its foreigners wives and girlfriends before. They just got better chances to get away with that here. Blame on them!

Very few foreigners with Thai wives even wear the pants the way a Thai thinks they should, never mind being a "master" of a "slave".

Out of those few (1%) that do properly control their girl, believe me 99% are paying dearly - in a purely financial sense - for the privilege, and the girl is consciously and willingly going along with the deal.

If someone is well paid and can choose to leave at any time, they aren't a slave.

Using this kind of terminology belittles the VERY high degree of real slavery that does still exist, not only in this region but all over the world.

In Thailand it's 99.9999999% perpetrated by Thais, and mostly against their neighbor nationalities and mostly in straight industries like fishing, the sexual aspect is relatively small.

Guys that marry girls who aren't motivated by money can very much confirm their Thai wives aren't the meek submissive type at all, their "payments" are in other than financial ways, IMO unacceptably high but whatever floats your boat. . .

So 0.01% of farang properly control their girl and are not paying dearly.

[mmh8]

money,

[wym]

So 0.01% of farang properly control their girl and are not paying dearly.

We may disagree on numbers, obviously WAGs.

But my point stands, if the girl isn't motivated by money she's unlikely to play the meek submissive stereotype, much more likely to show her true - STRONG - nature.

Thai society being patriarchal is IMO a myth once you pull back the curtain, within the home and many businesses, it's often the women who are smarter and pulling the strings just like back home. They just give their partner the illusion of control for the sake of face.

And of course many (most?) farang pay for everything AND cede control.

[JLCrab]

Your point never stood.

[wym]

Your point never stood.

Are you trying to say that there are many farang truly "treating its Thai wives like slaves"??

[JLCrab]

Your point never stood.

Are you trying to say that there are many farang truly "treating its Thai wives like slaves"??

no -- only I that I don't see that any point has been made.

Edited February 10, 2014 by JLCrab

[wym]

Thai women generally don't let farang treat them "like slaves" - they're willing to role-play when fairly compensated is all, and often (usually?) end up succeeding in reversing the roles before too long.

Clear enough?

[JLCrab]

Thai women generally don't let farang treat them "like slaves" - they're willing to role-play when fairly compensated is all, and often (usually?) end up succeeding in reversing the roles before too long.

Clear enough?

No -- hopelessly over-generalized muck.

[roadrunerboi]

Ability to buy Resort in Town house at Sukhumvit 24... downtown location, BTS accessible, walk to Emporium and a private pool...

[Donnie Brasco]

"Opinion" and its various guises and "fact" are clearly defined on hundreds of websites. (fact)

Distinguishing between the two and then putting this distinction into practice would save a lot of forum ink. (opinion)

"Forum ink" translates into "hits" (by induction and therefore not conclusive)

"Hits" translates into "sales" (opinion disguised as fact but supported partially by relevant data

"Sales" translates into "policy" (induction again, I'm afraid)

"Policy" likely filters out healthy skeptics from subscriber pools

Again, by induction (although strongly indicated but not conclusively proven) healthily skeptical subscribers" conducting their due diligence are likely unpopular in most sales environments.

OPINION ALERT *subscribers who routinely practice due diligence are more likely to have retirement nest eggs than are subscribers who habitually arrive at major purchasing decision purely on emotion."

(just sayin', is all ;-)))

"Sometimes, 'fuggedabowdit' just means fuggedabowdit."

Edited February 13, 2014 by Donnie Brasco