Jingthing Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 (edited) This guy has a good point. It's kind of an internalized homophobia, innit? With some misogyny thrown in the mix. When was the last time you heard someone make fun of a top? Never. But bottoms? Wow. How many times have you heard friends say things like, "Oh, he's just a big bottom." Or heard jokes like, "Why did the gay man cross the road? He heard the chicken was a top." Can you imagine somebody saying, "There's nothing but tops in this town?" Exactly. You can't. The most exalted thing you can say about a gay man, the biggest compliment you can pay him, is to call him a "top." And the worst thing you can say about him, the best way to put him down, is to call him a "bottom." Why? Because a lot of people buy into the idea that... Bottoming Makes You A Woman. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/mike-alvear/sex-advice-free-your-mind_b_5493845.html?utm_hp_ref=gay-voices Edited July 3, 2014 by Jingthing Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spoonman Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 if there is no bottoms it would be kinda hard for a gay to pull a root wouldn't it ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jingthing Posted July 3, 2014 Author Share Posted July 3, 2014 (edited) if there is no bottoms it would be kinda hard for a gay to pull a root wouldn't it ? You betcha! The general complaint though is TOO MANY bottoms. Or bottoms falsely claiming they are "versatile" ... There are also the more embellished descriptions, such as pushy bottoms and power bottoms. What are some other embellishments of basic bottoms? Edited July 3, 2014 by Jingthing Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onthemoon Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 You find problems where there aren't any. I know a lot of gay guys who are proud bottoms. As far as the quote "Bottoming Makes You A Woman" is concerned, I know lots of people who think that women are not less than a man. In fact, you are a mysogy... if you think that. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jingthing Posted July 3, 2014 Author Share Posted July 3, 2014 (edited) You find problems where there aren't any. I know a lot of gay guys who are proud bottoms. As far as the quote "Bottoming Makes You A Woman" is concerned, I know lots of people who think that women are not less than a man. In fact, you are a mysogy... if you think that. I posted a link. I found an article. I didn't find a problem. Please stick to the TOPIC and comment on the TOPIC, as opposed to transparent expression of personal dislike of any poster. You could have expressed your OPINION about the TOPIC without getting personal. Is that really SO HARD? My comment on the non-personal attack content of your message is that yes I agree there are many proud bottoms. However, I do agree with the author that there is IN GENERAL a devaluing of bottoms and an irrational overvaluing of tops among mainstream gay culture IN GENERAL. I think we are raised in a heterosexual world and some of the homophobia and misogyny which is an ingrained part of mainstream heterosexual societies can have a way of unconsciously RUBBING OFF on many GAY people as well. Again with the topic, really has anyone heard of a digging joke about gay TOPS? I certainly haven't but if any of you have, please do share! If you wish to respond, again please about the topic. (I am not the topic.) Edited July 3, 2014 by Jingthing Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ToddWeston Posted July 4, 2014 Share Posted July 4, 2014 I know a lot of gay guys who are proud bottoms.Oh no did I miss another parade or holiday ? 5555 btw when is Proud to be a Top day ?Personally I prefer the term train and tunnel. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jingthing Posted July 4, 2014 Author Share Posted July 4, 2014 (edited) I know a lot of gay guys who are proud bottoms.Oh no did I miss another parade or holiday ? 5555 btw when is Proud to be a Top day ?Personally I prefer the term train and tunnel. Actually I don't think the concept of bottoms being "proud" or "not proud" is really on point to this topic. You've posted an amusing response linking the proud aspect to parades. Cute image. Proud in the context of bottoms suggests they are not burdened by SHAME regarding their positional preferences. As well they should not be feeling shame. But whether bottoms feel shame or not, that bears (not that kind of bear, not talking about bear pride here) no impact on the point of the article in the OP ... that bottoms are indeed the butt of jokes and derision WITHIN the gay world while tops ARE NOT, presumably also from fellow bottoms ... that self hate / internalized homophobia thing rears its ugly head (oh my!) yet again. Edited July 4, 2014 by Jingthing Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ToYoungToRetire Posted July 5, 2014 Share Posted July 5, 2014 The submissive in any relationship is always thought of as weaker. As far as bottom jokes they dont make it far enough outside of the gay community for straight people to hear them. I've never heard one. sub·mis·sive səbˈmisiv/ adjective ready to conform to the authority or will of others; meekly obedient or passive. synonyms: compliant, yielding, acquiescent, unassertive, passive, obedient, biddable,dutiful, docile, pliant; More Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jingthing Posted July 5, 2014 Author Share Posted July 5, 2014 (edited) Gay people have subcultures and slang. Fancy that. Pushy bottoms ... not as submissive as you might imagine! Edited July 5, 2014 by Jingthing Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onthemoon Posted July 6, 2014 Share Posted July 6, 2014 Agree. The "submissive" one is often the one in control of the relationship. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David48 Posted July 6, 2014 Share Posted July 6, 2014 Agree. The "submissive" one is often the one in control of the relationship. Would that be topping from the bottom? or Passive Aggresive? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onthemoon Posted July 7, 2014 Share Posted July 7, 2014 Agree. The "submissive" one is often the one in control of the relationship. Would that be topping from the bottom? or Passive Aggresive? I don't understand "topping from the bottom" (certainly not an expression used in the gay world), but it is not "passive aggressive". That would be rather counter-productive in a relationship. You see, gay people are more independent than straight people. We have learned from a young age that we are different, and we resolve to live without support. If support does come, we are surprised and welcome it of course, but if it turns out to be not what we expected, we can more easily throw the person out. Hence the fact (well, at least my impression) that gay relationships (on average) are shorter than straight relationships. But a submissive-dominating relationship can be very stable indeed, if both partners like what they see in the other one. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scott Posted July 8, 2014 Share Posted July 8, 2014 And that is why I buy fancy pillowcases, so my partner likes what he sees. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post onthemoon Posted July 8, 2014 Popular Post Share Posted July 8, 2014 And that is why I buy fancy pillowcases, so my partner likes what he sees. You put them over your head? scnr 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scott Posted July 8, 2014 Share Posted July 8, 2014 I am just not as beautiful as I once was! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onthemoon Posted July 8, 2014 Share Posted July 8, 2014 I am just not as beautiful as I once was! You once were? Send pics! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sustento Posted July 8, 2014 Share Posted July 8, 2014 And that is why I buy fancy pillowcases, so my partner likes what he sees. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ironbark Posted July 14, 2014 Share Posted July 14, 2014 Sometimes it takes a real man to bottom. Sent from my GT-N7100 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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