Chaste Thai women - Versus easy come easy go..

[Donnie Brasco]

Quote "Farang have to have sex, cannot wait.. go see bar girl have sex her, you no love her..I not care.."

She doesn't sound very educated.

Only people who speak impeccable English are educated?

You really need to get over yourself!

That was a very foolish statement to make.

Are you educated?

It's not the English at question, it's the attitude, hardly a rounded education. There was never a claim I was educated so no point.

are you suggesting that NO educated women would not make that suggestion? and he asked you a question nota a claim? no points

I may be wrong about this (and Gawd knows there are scores of TVisa "opinionaters" who would agree with me [that I may, like, actually be wrong about this] but I think he's suggesting that the OP just might be making this up.

His cop to bargirl diction (what was that excuse again ?) . . . . . to accommodate us "kii-nokers"? rings like a cracked dinner bell.

And he has close contact with educated Thai women who can't manipulate the present simple or use the preposition "with" even though a straight transliteration from Thai pretty well dictates that we need a "with" in there somewhere.

But, like I said, I am probably wrong about this.

[Seastallion]

Do you think "flyingsaucersarereal"?

Because I've seen these silly topics before.

Could be.

[Scully]

Quote "Farang have to have sex, cannot wait.. go see bar girl have sex her, you no love her..I not care.."

She doesn't sound very educated.

Only people who speak impeccable English are educated?

You really need to get over yourself!

That was a very foolish statement to make.

Are you educated?

It's not the English at question, it's the attitude, hardly a rounded education. There was never a claim I was educated so no point.

are you suggesting that NO educated women would not make that suggestion? and he asked you a question not a claim? no points

The lady in question is educated, I am not the OP.

If an "educated" lady made a suggestion to me that I "needed" to have sex with a prostitute, then I would question her schooling. In my education I was taught to think outside the box, i.e. not every person from a certain country is the same.

If a poster on TV were to say all Thai women sell their body, I too would doubt a well rounded education.

Anyway I made the first post at beer o'clock, but if you would be happy with an educated lady telling you that you needed sex then good for you.

Good day.

[Donnie Brasco]

Do you think "flyingsaucersarereal"?

Because I've seen these silly topics before.

Could be.

Indeed.

The part that gets me is this: How the fork do the movers and shakers at TV expect to sell all these "fabulous" real estate parcels to guys who t'ink like dis ?

Zzzzzzzzssssssssohkay, there communitarians. Eyemjessfrackinwitchaz.

Fuggedaboudit.

[Baerboxer]

Quote "Farang have to have sex, cannot wait.. go see bar girl have sex her, you no love her..I not care.."

She doesn't sound very educated.

Her English is better than that, but I figured you wouldn't believe it, LOL, hence pidgin English for your expert perusal

I don't think any educated woman contemplating a serious relationship would encourage her potential future partner to freely use the services of prostitutes.

The whole point is that nice Thai ladies like to be sure of your seriousness, that you care, love and will look after them, not just wanting a few shags.

There are of course, very free spirited ladies who enjoy physical relationships but have no attention of getting married and like plenty of partners.

Think how you judged females in your younger days - the nice ones who took time and the dropped'em on the first night ones, great fun but never gonna be the mother of your kids.

[Baerboxer]

Quote "Farang have to have sex, cannot wait.. go see bar girl have sex her, you no love her..I not care.."

She doesn't sound very educated.

Only people who speak impeccable English are educated?

You really need to get over yourself!

That was a very foolish statement to make.

Are you educated?

It's not the English at question, it's the attitude, hardly a rounded education. There was never a claim I was educated so no point.

are you suggesting that NO educated women would not make that suggestion? and he asked you a question not a claim? no points

Yes.

Nothing to do with education, ability to speak any particular language. I don't believe any woman would tell a man she was considering having a serious loving relationship with to go and use the services of prostitutes if he needs sex while courting her. Telling him to go have a "J Arthur" maybe.

On the contrary I know several ladies who booted their boyfriends into touch for dabbling with whores whilst away on work or study trips.

Men may consider "entertainment" to include booze, food and the services of a whore. Very few ladies do, especially ex bar girls. Some turn a blind eye or tolerate this behavior as the man provides nicely for them, providing it's kept discrete, very discrete. But encouraging or giving their blessing - no way.

Edited December 29, 2014 by Baerboxer

[redandyellow]

Part One : Returning to Bangkok in 2007, I met my (future) wife for the first time in person at the Stable Lodge Hotel ( on Soi 8 near Sukhumvit Road ). Born in Phuket, Peung went to Bangkok at age eighteen to get a four year degree in Media Studies and English from Ramkhamhaeng University, then worked mainly at I.T. City.

We did some sightseeing in Bangkok with her girlfriend Noi in tow as her insurance. After knowing Peung for only three days she invited me to stay with her for a month outside Lansaka (reported as having the cleanest air in Thailand), about fifty kilometers from Nakhorn Si Thammarat. Peung had a small house and a large garden.

Being somewhat handy I bought some tools and started gardening and fixing a few things around the house to try to impress her. She was very attractive, trusting and extremely friendly. At this point we barely knew each other - but as a virtual stranger she had trusted me enough for me to stay alone with her!

This was much different than what I was used to in Western culture. Peung told me I would sleep in one bedroom and she would sleep in the other - and there would be no sex unless ( or until ) we got married. Ouch! I'd slept with several Thai women on my other trips (paid and unpaid), found that easy come easy go wasn't for me, and figured she was worth waiting for. Although there was no intercourse, I knew she wasn't frigid by any means, as she had done certain things for me--

For a few guys, waiting for a good Thai woman is well worth it, but that isn't the way for the majority. Many farang wouldn't wait to have sex with a Thai girl. In part, it's because they are partially or largely ignorant of Thai culture.

A lot of foreign men get into trouble with Thai women, and numbers of them end up killed. Getting hooked up with the wrong Thai woman can be lethal!

Like the parasitic Passion fruit vine, the bad Thai women will envelop and engulf their foreign host (the unwitting farang), chew him up, and spit him out..

A month later we went to Phuket to attend the last couple of days (Buddhist funerals in Thailand usually last seven to nine days) of a relative's funeral. I stayed at one sister's house, and she stayed with another of her sisters. Outside of sex everything was going pretty good. The next day someone from a car rental agency drove up in a jeep. Surprisingly, the worker told me the jeep was for me to drive; Peung had ordered it without me knowing. I hadn't planned to drive in Thailand as I'd seen how dangerously Thais drove - they also drove on the opposite side of the road from North America. This was going to be interesting, and very dangerous.

Back in Canada, a work colleague wasn't very impressed when I mentioned my new Thai (albeit platonic) friend. She told me, "If you're going to be with her, you should just move to Thailand. Don't bring her back to Canada, or your friends and relatives will gossip about you and her behind your backs! " She had recently watched a CBC (Canadian Broadcasting Corporation) program called "Bangkok Girl". The program implied that all single males going to Thailand (alone) had only one thing on their mind - sex. Thai bar girls were stereotyped as uneducated, street smart, aggressive, manipulative, malicious con-artists. Each working girl had two or three deluded farang on the hook, sending them money each month, with each foreigner thinking they were the "only one" in her life. Stories like that are a reality for many at-risk foreigners, hence the generalizations in programs like "Bangkok Girl."

No bloody wonder the west is ignorant about a lot of things Thailand, and that extends to some Thai expats, who fail to assimilate into Thai culture at all, thus retaining their inherent western perceptions, whatever they may be, as they sit in beer bars and commiserate with their comrades in arms

[redandyellow]

Part 2 "Sex is the consolation you have when you can't have love." Gabriel Garcia Marquez ( Columbian Author-Journalist, winner of the 1982 Nobel Peace Prize, 1927- 2014 )

Foreign men are often lured to Thailand by the pleasant nature and legendary beauty of Thai women. Foreign men have heard or read that Thai women are family-orientated, hard-working, make excellent wives, and are among the most attentive women in the world to their partners. Thai women work very hard to please a good husband. The majority of foreign men discover that the positive attributes of Thai women have been very accurately portrayed. The woman's liberation movement of the 1960's did not influence Thai women to the same degree as western woman. Most Thai women are "old- fashioned," in ways that many western men appreciate. It doesn't mean that Thai women are passive doormats, but they're usually very different than their western counterparts.

Despite frequent horror stories, most Thai women participating in the sex-trade are decent human beings - simply in search of a better life for themselves and their families. They have a genuine desire to make something out of their lives, and who can blame them? Given the inherent conditions in the sex-trade industry, it's amazing such a small minority of the women turn bad.

However, a small percentage of Thai women become some of the premium rip-off artists in the world, and many of them come from the sex-trade. Bad Thai girls are similar to bad girls the world over. In Thailand however, women of this ilk go to extremes when it comes to exploiting susceptible foreigners for their money.

Back home, these same men understand clearly that prostitutes aren't the preferred group for potential wife material. When foreign men finally discover that normal relationships with sex- trade workers is close to impossible, they rent them and avoid relationships altogether. At this point in the cycle - the foreigner becomes hardened and negative towards all Thai woman.

The following is written by Professor Bruno Mayer, an expert in Thailand's sex industry. The following excerpt illustrates the "Cross- Cultural Complications of Prostitution in Thailand."

"A notable change in attitudes occurs in those expatriates who spend a considerable length of time in Thailand, and who incur long-term exposure to the bars and the prostitutes who live there.

During the initial phase of contact, farang (like Mike) are attracted to the girls, and during the first few months may attempt to form friendships with them. Many farang initially take the view that that the girls are forced into the life of prostitution, and that given the opportunity would prefer to have a regular boyfriend-girlfriend relationship. The girls often give the impression that this is the case, but there is an ambiguity inherent in the nature of the bargirl-customer relationship that the farang often fails to appreciate.

To the Thai bar-girl, love and money are not separate aims. The girl sincerely believes that money is an expression of love, and that love is an emotion bestowed to those who offer support, support being more often than not, financial. The girl sees nothing incongruous about linking money and love, but the farang - observing the relationship from a Western perspective, believes that the two are mutually exclusive. One is loved for one's money, or for one's self.

Newcomers to the bar scene tend to the belief that girls will in fact love them for themselves, and therefore try whenever they can to restrict the amount of money they give to the girl. No matter how much the girl is attracted to the man she will resent the reduction in financial support - seeing it as a lack of commitment.

The girl might not express her disappointment verbally, but her actions will lead the man to realize that she is unhappy. He in turn will believe that she loves him only for his money, in which case he will try to test her by further reducing the amount of money he gives her. Such relationships always fall apart.

After the farang has been through the cycle several times, he will begin to distrust all bar-girls, labeling them as prostitutes who care only about money. They are unable to accept that the girls see nothing wrong in liking, or even loving a man for his financial support - that to the girl such things are inextricably linked.

The farang will stop searching out girls with whom he can build a loving relationship in keeping with his western ideal, but instead makes due with individual sexual encounters, one-night stands if you like, with the sex paid for and no emotional attachment sought.

Such farang begin to see all women in Thailand as prostitutes, and eventually become resentful and scornful of Thais generally. Once they reach this stage, many farang decide to leave the country - never to return."

[Squeegee]

You said you were leaving OP, so why didn't you?

Do you often say things you don't mean? Do you like attention?

[redandyellow]

You said you were leaving OP, so why didn't you?

Do you often say things you don't mean? Do you like attention?

not normally, you'll either forgive me or not, up to you

I like attention about the same amount as you..which is not that much really, but have a nice day

[jspill]

The following is written by Professor Bruno Mayer, an expert in Thailand's sex industry. The following excerpt illustrates the "Cross- Cultural Complications of Prostitution in Thailand."

"A notable change in attitudes occurs in those expatriates who spend a considerable length of time in Thailand, and who incur long-term exposure to the bars and the prostitutes who live there.

During the initial phase of contact, farang (like Mike) are attracted to the girls, and during the first few months may attempt to form friendships with them. Many farang initially take the view that that the girls are forced into the life of prostitution, and that given the opportunity would prefer to have a regular boyfriend-girlfriend relationship. The girls often give the impression that this is the case, but there is an ambiguity inherent in the nature of the bargirl-customer relationship that the farang often fails to appreciate.

To the Thai bar-girl, love and money are not separate aims. The girl sincerely believes that money is an expression of love, and that love is an emotion bestowed to those who offer support, support being more often than not, financial. The girl sees nothing incongruous about linking money and love, but the farang - observing the relationship from a Western perspective, believes that the two are mutually exclusive. One is loved for one's money, or for one's self.

Newcomers to the bar scene tend to the belief that girls will in fact love them for themselves, and therefore try whenever they can to restrict the amount of money they give to the girl. No matter how much the girl is attracted to the man she will resent the reduction in financial support - seeing it as a lack of commitment.

The girl might not express her disappointment verbally, but her actions will lead the man to realize that she is unhappy. He in turn will believe that she loves him only for his money, in which case he will try to test her by further reducing the amount of money he gives her. Such relationships always fall apart.

After the farang has been through the cycle several times, he will begin to distrust all bar-girls, labeling them as prostitutes who care only about money. They are unable to accept that the girls see nothing wrong in liking, or even loving a man for his financial support - that to the girl such things are inextricably linked.

The farang will stop searching out girls with whom he can build a loving relationship in keeping with his western ideal, but instead makes due with individual sexual encounters, one-night stands if you like, with the sex paid for and no emotional attachment sought.

Such farang begin to see all women in Thailand as prostitutes, and eventually become resentful and scornful of Thais generally. Once they reach this stage, many farang decide to leave the country - never to return."

This passage is fictitious, it's a chapter in Private dancer. The author writes from the fictional perspective of a professor.

That's why it's over the top and sensationalized. A small amount of truth for some cases, but everyone's different. Plenty of normal asian girls and prostitutes alike don't see money as inextricably linked to love.

Google the name and you'll find Private dancer on Amazon where the blurb explains how the author 'Stephen Leather takes an interesting approach to the story, telling it alternately from the viewpoints of Pete, Joy, Pete's farang friends and acquaintances (Nigel, Big Ron, Bruce, Jimmy), the private detective Phiraphan, Pete's employer Alistair, and a certain Professor Bruno Mayer, an expert on prostitution in Thailand and cross-cultural relationships between the sex workers and their customers.'

[redandyellow]

"Plenty of normal Asian girls and prostitutes alike don't see money as inextricably linked to love."

1.Thanks for the clarification on Prof. Bruno - I was unsure if he was a real Professor or a made-up character - as he supposedly died in Chiang Mai in a car accident - guess that's all part of the story..

2. Regarding your quote.. I wrote this a while back, it comes from sources and experience..your view?

..Western culture dictates money and love don't mix. While money is associated with business - love is something deep down in a person 's heart. In contrast, Thais show love by offering financial support. The concept of financial support as part of love is difficult for westerners to understand. It makes the westerner feel their independence is threatened, or impinged upon. When westerners are expected to share their wealth, they often balk at the idea. Many male foreigners wrongly assume that all Thai women are only after their money ( although some are for sure ). Outside of a small minority of bad girls, this isn't the case. This type of cultural ignorance dooms many inter-racial relationships from the start. But think about it! In reality- very few western women would marry a man that offered them little or nothing in terms of tangible financial support. Love doesn't put food on the table - and Thai women are quite pragmatic in this regard...

[jspill]

Yeah I would agree in general. But it isn't just a race thing, so 'Thais show love by offering financial support' is a bit too simplistic. There are socioeconomic factors too. Western women have more education and employment opportunities, and need much less financial support. Thai - farang couples on the same financial level can show love in other ways.

[Gonsalviz]

Is there a question somewhere in the OPs post or is this just an observation topic?

Now you wouldnt buy a car without test driving it would you? A new TV without checking out the features?

a Thai woman isn't a car sir, but they both are driven

but you miss my point young grasshopper.... for a man, his car (in my case truck) is something we take very seriously. We wash it, polish it, and treat it as one of the family. It's our space, our last bastion of freedom from the ever enclosing world of cant do this, must do that society - compounded upon getting married. IF we could marry it, shag it we probably would despite their looks.

so in this context, we are very choosy to make sure our vehicle of choice ticks all the right boxes in terms of long term compatibility. Part in parcel of this is the ride. Does it feel good, will it continue to feel good with a few miles on it? I wouldn't buy a vehicle without giving it a good test run....

no need to backtrack, or attempt to be magnanimous now ..in hind site... too late.. the true colors were already seen LOL.. you've seen the last of me, so onto the next victim,LOL all the best though Bye Bye

thought things might have changed ... I wrong again

There are some subject that will not even approach on TV precisely because of what you speak.