Baggage

[marko kok prong]

First hello to all my freinds on TV,i think i have some,anyway maybe i am wrong,but my question to you is ;can you ever ,or can your relationship survive the baggage,in my case a son from a previous falang+ thai, relationship,who is possibly the laziest,dirtiest little s***,i have ever met,throwing rubbish around and tipping his left over food right next to the house,yet too his mother,he is an angel,we have had arguments about him,but as i now look in the grim mirror of reality,i realise he will never change,i have a lot of good friends around my area,and do not want to move,i only ask her to speak to the kid,but she cannot or will not,the latest incident involve him coating the bathroom sink with copius amount of phleghm,he had spat up from his lungs and leaving it to who ever,except him to clean,apart from murder,any ideas?

[Ulysses G.]

Hear, hear!

[tom21]

, all I can say is good luck.

[marko kok prong]

The grammar police have left me; in a worse state than what i was before.....,i what i was.& n' that

[ATF]

In the good old days punk kids used to get a kicking off their father. Now they get an iPad.

[marko kok prong]

Thank's atf,thinking it over,though not my kid,if it was agree,but don't think it would be appropriate.

[ATF]

Thank's atf,thinking it over,though not my kid,if it was agree,but don't think it would be appropriate.

You gotta lay down the law. Either way you can't lose. He'll either become submissive or leave. If mum loves him more than you she'll go too but I doubt it.

[marko kok prong]

Atf,thanks mate,you have always been a good pal on this forum,witha lot of others,don't know what i will do ,cannot see it changing much,maybe i should just fadeaway,leave them too it.

[ATF]

Atf,thanks mate,you have always been a good pal on this forum,witha lot of others,don't know what i will do ,cannot see it changing much,maybe i should just fadeaway,leave them too it.

Put yourself in the kid's position. His biological father isn't around so he's either looking for guidance or he's trying to knock you off your perch. His mother isn't getting involved because she doesn't want to alienate either of you.

Like it or not you are his father now so act accordingly. Good Luck.

[phil2]

Just tell her you'll leave if she doesn't make him stop.

My ex mother in law used to shat and piss on the bathroom floor, or spit the reddish stuff she eats all over the bathroom sink and floor just to get at me. She stopped, or was told to by her daughter after I asked her to leave.

[Eddy B]

How old is the kid and how old was he when you began the relationship with his mother. These are factors that can help people to give you more advice.

[CharlieH]

The "grammar police" and responses to it have been removed.

[seajae]

, I know my step daughter was a total s*** to me when I married her mother, she had always had her own way and told everyone else what to do. She never spoke to me, only grunted, if I kissed her mother goodbye she would hit me or attempt to but I would grab her arm and give her a dirty look. It came to a head and I told her mother that unless the daughter cut the crap I would leave, the mother got pretty upset, she said that she wanted me to stay and said her daughter was important to her but she spoke to her when she realized I was not joking and was prepared to move out. The daughter was still a bitch at times but started to improve and her mother started to come down on her a lot more when she carried on. Eventually we were all able to sit down together to talk as the daughter finally relented and agreed to listen. I told her that I loved her mother and I was not there to take her away from her but that I also wanted to be a father to her and for us to be a family, she cried a lot but she did start to change and now we get on pretty good, she invites me to her school for fathers day and is proud to have me there, we are finally more like a real family. Maybe you need to do the same thing, sometimes you do need to be a bit assertive with them but he does sound like a right little ****.

[scoutman360]

I sympathize, and wish I had the answers. I just remember hearing my father say the same thing about me to my mother when I was young. Today I am far more successful than he ever was. I can only suggest to set boundary's and don't back down. He will step up to your challenges and/or he will leave and still have to learn on his own. At his age, the free ride is over. You can offer him a lot, but it doesn't come free. Make sure you teach him that about life.

[daveAustin]

Short sharp shock! Either that or tell her you'll walk unless he joins the human race pronto. Don't degrade your life for some little punk.

[sipi]

Baggage can kill a relationship. My exwife was loaded with it. Her family ignored me, spoke about me behind my back. She was blowing money.

Then I married a Thai. Everything changed for the best.

[marko kok prong]

Thanks for all the advice guys,guess i will have to sit down and think about what to do .