Popular Post bowerboy Posted January 21, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 My son is 2 years and 8 months old and has just started Kindergarten. There are about 15 kids in his class and it is an International School (not a top one but a pretty good one). In his class there are probably 3 or 4 Leukrung Kids, 9 or 10 Thai Kids (bad mix for an International School but that is another subject) and 1 sole Farang Kid. All the kids are roughly the same age and the Farang kid is the same age as our Leukrun son. His parents are Australian and they are both teachers. What greatly concerns me is that the Farang kid is absolutely miles and miles ahead of every other kid in that Kindergarten. The difference is absolutely shocking to me and frankly speaking to all of the Thai parents there. He is completely independant and takes care of himself and it is absolutely crystal clear to everyone who observes the class for 2 minutes that the kid is in a completely different leaugue in terms of emotional and academic development. The thing is though that he is nothing special compared to other Farang kids its just that he stands out so much compared to the Thai and Leukrung kids in his class. I mean it is indisputable and the Thai parents even get uncomfortable when comparing his development to their own Children and so do I. We have raised our kid very much the Thai way where anything goes and there is no discipline or direction or guidance...just do what has to be done hour by hour and see where it all ends up. I know the childs parents well and I know the steps they take when child rearing and it is so very very different to the Thai way and the results are just so clear and so profound. In his book Outliers, Malcolm Gladstone talks about the reason that the Chinese are so much better at mathematics than their Western counterparts. Basically their numbering system is far more logical than the western system which makes calculations much easier. As the basics are easier to learn their mind doesnt need as much time to digest the information and so they progress more quickly but that "headstart gives them an exponential advantge over time. I look at that kid in the kindergarten and its the same thing...he is so far ahead of his Thai counterparts at this time that his growth, development and intelligence will grow exponentially faster than his Thai peers and I think this is born out right through to adulthood (seriously just compare the salaries and job opportunities westerners have compared to locals). The difference the parenting styles make in the childs development is just so shocking and scary to me....obviously it wouldnt be if we had been doing things the right way. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post AnotherOneAmerican Posted January 21, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 Which kids a the happiest? Which kids interact best with their peers? 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stradavarius37 Posted January 21, 2015 Share Posted January 21, 2015 Different is now "better" - good for you if you think so! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Berkshire Posted January 21, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 Another Thai-bashing thread from our resident basher, the bower boy. How can you possibly know, at two to three years of age, that "the Farang kid is absolutely miles and miles ahead of every other kid in that Kindergarten." Is he doing advanced calculus? Is he publishing research papers? The answer is you don't know. But being as hopelessly biased as you are, I'm sure you'll come up with a long list of bogus reasons. 23 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post uptheos Posted January 21, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 If that's what the OP has truly noticed, why castigate him? 30 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Briggsy Posted January 21, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 I went to school with a kid whose parents were astrophysicists. He was always top of the class. He did particularly well in maths and physics. He is probably an astrophysicist himself now. The point is the home environment is of paramount importance to a child's academic, emotional and behavioural development. If the home life consists of the tv on full blast for 18 hours a day then many studies have shown this is not the best way. 16 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bowerboy Posted January 21, 2015 Author Share Posted January 21, 2015 Another Thai-bashing thread from our resident basher, the bower boy. How can you possibly know, at two to three years of age, that "the Farang kid is absolutely miles and miles ahead of every other kid in that Kindergarten." Is he doing advanced calculus? Is he publishing research papers? The answer is you don't know. But being as hopelessly biased as you are, I'm sure you'll come up with a long list of bogus reasons. Anyone can see it...it is just so blindingly obvious when you observe it....that is what concerns me and that is why i raised it. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bowerboy Posted January 21, 2015 Author Share Posted January 21, 2015 Which kids a the happiest? Which kids interact best with their peers? By the way the Thai kids are mostly in hysterics and wandering around in a helpless state while the Farang kid runs around talking to them all and encoraging them to play i would say the Farang kid...and by a massive margin. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post bowerboy Posted January 21, 2015 Author Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 Its not the academice difference that concerns me .... Its the emotional maturity compared to his peers... It is no accident he is that way. Just for one thing amongst many is that I am shocked to see he is pretty much the only kid there that can feed himself... 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post simon43 Posted January 21, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 Sometimes the hard truth hurts.... 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnotherOneAmerican Posted January 21, 2015 Share Posted January 21, 2015 How many languages does white boy speak? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post ATF Posted January 21, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 I think you are a bit of a thicko. You have already stated both his parents are teachers. They are teaching him and helping him with his homework while you are swilling Chang. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree. 12 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post bkkgooner Posted January 21, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 international schools do great jobs at teaching toddlers to be independent I wouldn't worry about it too much also the kid is growing up with two teachers who presumably teach at an international school and know this stuff inside out. Thais have a general problem with teaching independence to little ones and that is something that myself and my wife are trying to instill in our 2 year old just little things like making him feed himself, taking his plate to the sink, washing his own hands and brushing his teeth, all of those little things make a difference. i remember when I first settled here my five year old step son was being spoon fed - it was actually disgusting watching it happen I had to really put my foot down and stamp it out quickly he also slept with his grandmother until the age of 9 ( what the <deleted>). In fairness though you should see some of the Thai kids at Harrow and places like that they are miles ahead of government school toddlers just because they are being taught to be independent. 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post sipi Posted January 21, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 Shocking.... My 4 year old Thai son prefers heavy-metal to The Wiggles, but I'm sure he'll get over it. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post h90 Posted January 21, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 If that's what the OP has truly noticed, why castigate him? Because it is not Political Correct. 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post bowerboy Posted January 21, 2015 Author Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 ATF...thanks for your kind comments...he is at Kindergarten, there is no homework or school work..basically just structured play...but thanks anyway for your deep insight. Thanks bkkgooner...yes I am hoping the school will straighten things out a bit for our son and I know what you mean about the spoon feeding, shocking at that age really and yeah the sleeping with the parents or grandparents cannot be good although I know it is widely done here...they just dont want to seem to invest the time now to fix a much bigger problem later. Thankfully my wife is starting to see the reality now and we will not make the same mistakes with our second son (3 months old now). She is actually pretty amazed at the Farang kid and seeing him for the first time has made her realise the reality of what I have been telling her about parenting and the Western style of structure, discipline and independance.....honestly I think she is quite shocked now she is seeing it for the first time. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post uptheos Posted January 21, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 Its not the academice difference that concerns me .... Its the emotional maturity compared to his peers... It is no accident he is that way. Just for one thing amongst many is that I am shocked to see he is pretty much the only kid there that can feed himself... Most Thai boys get mummied and sticky rice shoved in their chops at the first sign of a wobbly. Go to any food court when it's busy and they are jumping around, screaming crying etc, the girls seem OK and able to feed themselves. This behaviour of course continues into adult age where they expect the same, to be fed and girls behave. In that same food court you will find farang kids of a similar age, buying their coupons, choosing their food and eating without help from mummy or daddy, if daddy isn't over with the Thai guy ogling the chang girls. 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HooHaa Posted January 21, 2015 Share Posted January 21, 2015 I suspect it says more about the op's parenting abilities. After 7 years in Thailand my child at age 8 is in the top 90 percentile for the state of California for her age group according to the goverments annual tests. This after 1 half year in grade 1. But that is perhaps because I was an active participant in her upbringing. Her mixed ethnicity has nothing to do with it. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ATF Posted January 21, 2015 Share Posted January 21, 2015 What you will find is that the Thai/Louk Kreung kids usually have more staying power. If you can get them in the zone they will study harder and longer than most Western kids and they won't be so easily distracted in their teenage years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Oceanbat Posted January 21, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 I suspect it says more about the op's parenting abilities. After 7 years in Thailand my child at age 8 is in the top 90 percentile for the state of California for her age group according to the goverments annual tests. This after 1 half year in grade 1. But that is perhaps because I was an active participant in her upbringing. Her mixed ethnicity has nothing to do with it. Isn't that exactly what he was saying? OB 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Laughing Gravy Posted January 21, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 (edited) The Op is really making generalising and sweeping statements. As mentioned the kid has Teachers as parents which is a big help. What I have noticed and once again not in all cases, I find that the middle classes employ maids, nannies and drivers which take away some children's independence. I believe this often hinders young children and that these children become use to 'a helping hand' and the learning process. I have also noticed that Thai children in international school do catch the western children up and often surpass them later on, through the school years in an academic sense. One aspect of school life I still see western children doing better, is in sports such as football, running, swimming etc. Again there are always exceptions. I put this down to a variety of factors such as, genetics, environment, aggression Either way to the Op another factor is language based. Most Thai Children speak Thai as their first language and English as a second. This will always be a major factor. Eventually the Thai children catch up. Bilingualism is very difficult to achieve and takes time. One last thing every child is unique and has different qualities. I really feel that children should not be compared to much. They get that enough in life. Celebrate the good things and the things that children need to improve on. Comparing everything isn't always the best thing to do. Edited January 21, 2015 by Laughing Gravy 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Costas2008 Posted January 21, 2015 Share Posted January 21, 2015 Why is it, my kid is always better than all the rest of them? Just a thought.......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Oceanbat Posted January 21, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 Why is it, my kid is always better than all the rest of them? Just a thought.......... He's not saying his kid is ahead of the class. OB 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post samsensam Posted January 21, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 Why is it, my kid is always better than all the rest of them? Just a thought.......... OP was saying the opposite 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bkkgooner Posted January 21, 2015 Share Posted January 21, 2015 ATF...thanks for your kind comments...he is at Kindergarten, there is no homework or school work..basically just structured play...but thanks anyway for your deep insight. Thanks bkkgooner...yes I am hoping the school will straighten things out a bit for our son and I know what you mean about the spoon feeding, shocking at that age really and yeah the sleeping with the parents or grandparents cannot be good although I know it is widely done here...they just dont want to seem to invest the time now to fix a much bigger problem later. Thankfully my wife is starting to see the reality now and we will not make the same mistakes with our second son (3 months old now). She is actually pretty amazed at the Farang kid and seeing him for the first time has made her realise the reality of what I have been telling her about parenting and the Western style of structure, discipline and independance.....honestly I think she is quite shocked now she is seeing it for the first time. Trust me, I have seen first hand at international schools how they teach the kids at that age. Little two year old kids were feeding themselves, putting their plates in the sink, tidying away their own toys etc. all due to the clear goals that the school has laid down for toddlers to accomplish during lessons. Best of luck with it mate just keep teaching them the things that really matter and it will fall in place. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post EmptyHead Posted January 21, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 (edited) Kids are different. We literally have done nothing special for our daughter. We haven't attempted to make her dress herself, use the toilet etc. etc. She demands to do this stuff on her own. If we try to help her or interfere she gets angry and tells us to go away (so she can do it alone). There's not much we have to do for her anymore. She will be 3 in a few months. She is already drawing things she sees and trying to write the alphabet. She can actually write a few letters. She's got well over 10 word sentences in 3 languages. Everyone (Thai and farang) says she's way ahead (even compared to my cousin's kids in the west who are older). Last night, i was successfully able to negotiate with her (in English) that if she turned the water hose on for me (over the other side of the garden)i would give her back her bubbles, otherwise not. It took a couple of minutes where she acted like a baby, but then went over and did it. Now, like i said before we haven't attempted to educate or teach her. We just speak to her like she's an adult and let her curiosity about things teach her. Yes, we buy books for her and occasionally read them to her, but that's it. I would also like to note: she has no toys and we don't baby her. Any toys her grandparents have given her have been discarded after she "figured them out". So, back to my main point. We haven't tried to teach her. I don't think we can blame Thais or whatever. Some kids are just more curious to figure things out than others and i don't think its much to do with parenting. Likewise, you can observe kids of the same family. One really smart and socially well adjusted and the other sibling the complete opposite. Me and her mother aren't anything special: I am a poor excuse for an ESL teacher (former construction worker) and her mother was a barmaid in Sukhumvit who left school at age 15. Yet, we have a bright kid. Go figure. They have their own personalities and attributes, I don't think it's necessarily much to do with race or even what the parents did. Edited January 21, 2015 by EmptyHead 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
h90 Posted January 21, 2015 Share Posted January 21, 2015 Its not the academice difference that concerns me .... Its the emotional maturity compared to his peers... It is no accident he is that way. Just for one thing amongst many is that I am shocked to see he is pretty much the only kid there that can feed himself... Most Thai boys get mummied and sticky rice shoved in their chops at the first sign of a wobbly. Go to any food court when it's busy and they are jumping around, screaming crying etc, the girls seem OK and able to feed themselves. This behaviour of course continues into adult age where they expect the same, to be fed and girls behave. In that same food court you will find farang kids of a similar age, buying their coupons, choosing their food and eating without help from mummy or daddy, if daddy isn't over with the Thai guy ogling the chang girls. If someone tries to feed me with the food court crap I would also jumping, screaming and crying.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fishbrando Posted January 21, 2015 Share Posted January 21, 2015 I've noticed the same thing as the OP - Western children in general seem more disciplined at a young age than Thai or other Asian children. Many Asian children are almost half-feral, screaming and flailing about wildly (although this certainly describes plenty of Western children I've seen in the US!) It goes to show the importance of proper upbringing. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lukecan Posted January 21, 2015 Share Posted January 21, 2015 (edited) What if your kid had aspergers and was acting all weird not socialising etc, would you say that the thai kids were superior compared to him? Using 1 example to generalise, there is the exception and then theres the rule. Edited January 21, 2015 by Lukecan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Smurkster Posted January 21, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted January 21, 2015 (edited) <script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script> Another Thai-bashing thread from our resident basher, the bower boy. How can you possibly know, at two to three years of age, that "the Farang kid is absolutely miles and miles ahead of every other kid in that Kindergarten." Is he doing advanced calculus? Is he publishing research papers? The answer is you don't know. But being as hopelessly biased as you are, I'm sure you'll come up with a long list of bogus reasons. why do you have to construe it as Thai bashing, I'd call it observation ....I don't see anything bashing at all about his post....can't someone call it as they see it without being accused of "bashing" an entire ethnicity??? Edited January 21, 2015 by Smurkster 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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