Being Polite?

[Sing_Sling]

The horse stays - it's my defense when I'm bested at :

i have taken gold in our discussion and i am better then you at verbal sparing and general banter.

Love it!

your a cracking top bloke sing sling,

and you are welcome to honour my good self with a top drink at my expense of course, any time you are in los.

i salute you

cheers my old salt

Cheers, mate - I'm in BKK and NE about every second week . . . It would go down a treat!

[The Skipper]

I went out for dinner recently and was kind of horrified at the way the european tourist family on the table next to me were treating the waiter. The 'dad' had an awful scowl on his face the entire time he was ordering, didn't say please, thank you or even look at the waiter. I thought it was horribly rude.

After the waiter walked away 'dad' called out to him and raised his glass in a cheers/thank you - he still with the awful scowl on his face but it was obviously a sincere gesture. It was something of a reminder that the standard of 'polite behaviour' varies quite a bit between countries.

It is very easy to misinterpret the behaviour of someone from another culture. Particularly if they've just got off the plane and come from a non-smiling country!

That's nothing. Go out to a Thai restaurant and watch the locals work over the staff.

[Sing_Sling]

I went out for dinner recently and was kind of horrified at the way the european tourist family on the table next to me were treating the waiter. The 'dad' had an awful scowl on his face the entire time he was ordering, didn't say please, thank you or even look at the waiter. I thought it was horribly rude.

After the waiter walked away 'dad' called out to him and raised his glass in a cheers/thank you - he still with the awful scowl on his face but it was obviously a sincere gesture. It was something of a reminder that the standard of 'polite behaviour' varies quite a bit between countries.

It is very easy to misinterpret the behaviour of someone from another culture. Particularly if they've just got off the plane and come from a non-smiling country!

That's nothing. Go out to a Thai restaurant and watch the locals work over the staff.

I'd have to agree with the Skipper. Again, something you'll find all over Asia - locals are quite unplesant when it comes to the service staff - foreigners are generally babes in the woods in comparison.

[gabe]

you chose to read my post other wise.

as sling often/frequently does

a classic mistake on this forum sling, people reading posts in the unintended manner.

so true

PS.

how about i go halves with you and we will buy the bloody horse another pair of legs.

that is definatley a funky avatar

[Donz]

I went out for dinner recently and was kind of horrified at the way the european tourist family on the table next to me were treating the waiter. The 'dad' had an awful scowl on his face the entire time he was ordering, didn't say please, thank you or even look at the waiter. I thought it was horribly rude.

After the waiter walked away 'dad' called out to him and raised his glass in a cheers/thank you - he still with the awful scowl on his face but it was obviously a sincere gesture. It was something of a reminder that the standard of 'polite behaviour' varies quite a bit between countries.

It is very easy to misinterpret the behaviour of someone from another culture. Particularly if they've just got off the plane and come from a non-smiling country!

That's nothing. Go out to a Thai restaurant and watch the locals work over the staff.

I'd have to agree with the Skipper. Again, something you'll find all over Asia - locals are quite unplesant when it comes to the service staff - foreigners are generally babes in the woods in comparison.

I dont agree, I would say more then 50% of farangs are rude to service staff and always looking for special treatment.

[Sing_Sling]

And you base this on what research or expience, donz?

[Donz]

And you base this on what research or expience, donz?

My travel through asia and in australia. Also with my unbiased look on things

[the swagman]

Some farangs do, some farangs don't.

Some Thais do, some Thais don't.

I would have to agree with Donz about the farang. Generally non thais are ruder to service staff than Thais.

[higgy88]

As a general rule, I would say that Thais look down on the service staff and would act more rudely to them according to their lower status. Falongs may, in general, be more polite but would definately act much more rudely if, for whatever reason, their order is not to their complete satisfaction. Thais take that much more in stride.

[sbk]

I went out for dinner recently and was kind of horrified at the way the european tourist family on the table next to me were treating the waiter. The 'dad' had an awful scowl on his face the entire time he was ordering, didn't say please, thank you or even look at the waiter. I thought it was horribly rude.

After the waiter walked away 'dad' called out to him and raised his glass in a cheers/thank you - he still with the awful scowl on his face but it was obviously a sincere gesture. It was something of a reminder that the standard of 'polite behaviour' varies quite a bit between countries.

It is very easy to misinterpret the behaviour of someone from another culture. Particularly if they've just got off the plane and come from a non-smiling country!

That's nothing. Go out to a Thai restaurant and watch the locals work over the staff.

I'd have to agree with the Skipper. Again, something you'll find all over Asia - locals are quite unplesant when it comes to the service staff - foreigners are generally babes in the woods in comparison.

As a general rule, I would say that Thais look down on the service staff and would act more rudely to them according to their lower status. Falongs may, in general, be more polite but would definately act much more rudely if, for whatever reason, their order is not to their complete satisfaction. Thais take that much more in stride.

Both true, our staff prefer foreign customers to Thai as the Thai seem to treat the staff as their personal servants. Not all, but so far, in 5 years, much higher than 50%. That said, nothing like an irate farang unhappy with the service

[ashacat]

SBK & Higgy88.

Hit the nail on the head there.

I agree that it is generally more likely that Thai customers will look down at restaurant staff and as a result come accross as being pretty rude.

Farang generally appear more polite. Please, thank you etc. (IMHO)

But as SBK says, farangs who feel that the service/food is not up to scratch will be a lot more "vocal"!!

Although I'm sure that in some areas pissed up farangs can be nightmare customers!!!

Edited August 28, 2006 by ashacat

[terry57]

The horse stays - it's my defense when I'm bested at :

i have taken gold in our discussion and i am better then you at verbal sparing and general banter.

Love it!

your a cracking top bloke sing sling,

and you are welcome to honour my good self with a top drink at my expense of course, any time you are in los.

i salute you

cheers my old salt

Cheers, mate - I'm in BKK and NE about every second week . . . It would go down a treat!

hey sling,

all the punters on this board know that i'll be back in los in november.

but at the moment i'm running around freo saving lives and property.

but you my friend,

are a champion sounding person and im buying you the best larger los has to offer.

as cricky's mate,

we only live once and thats why i love los as i feel im living into eternity.

meeting you will be a pleasure,

as long as you dont drink to much that is

cheers, my good and learn'ed man.

ps. look mate ,

you might not give a flying <deleted>--ck about the horse but its getting new legs when i get there.

[terry57]

you chose to read my post other wise.

as sling often/frequently does

a classic mistake on this forum sling, people reading posts in the unintended manner.

so true

PS.

how about i go halves with you and we will buy the bloody horse another pair of legs.

that is definatley a funky avatar

it's bleeding cruel mate,

you would not see roy rogers riding around on that beast.

anyway, whatever mate, and im over it.

cheers

[the swagman]

I agree that it is generally more likely that Thai customers will look down at restaurant staff and as a result come accross as being pretty rude.

Farang generally appear more polite. Please, thank you etc. (IMHO)

But as SBK says, farangs who feel that the service/food is not up to scratch will be a lot more "vocal"!!

Although I'm sure that in some areas pissed up farangs can be nightmare customers!!!

'Come across as being pretty rude'

'appear more polite.'

To western eyes and to western polite behaviour.

I think many foreigners are not too comfortable with having people do things for them on such a regular basis and with such detail and care of service. They therefore tend to overcompensate by being extra polite.

On the other hand locals who are more used to this type of service and the idea of having house help etc etc use waiters and waitresses as one does other staff.

I don't know if 'look down at restaurant staff' is the right choice of words. 'Use the staff as staff' may be more correct.

The western custom, whereby the staff are part of the family and everybody knows each others name and some family history is not followed here.

Rude people are rude people, wherever they live or come from.

They are not bound by any nationality, creed or race.

I try to be polite and courteous throughout my daily life it is surprising how better things in general work out.

[terry57]

I agree that it is generally more likely that Thai customers will look down at restaurant staff and as a result come accross as being pretty rude.

Farang generally appear more polite. Please, thank you etc. (IMHO)

But as SBK says, farangs who feel that the service/food is not up to scratch will be a lot more "vocal"!!

Although I'm sure that in some areas pissed up farangs can be nightmare customers!!!

'Come across as being pretty rude'

'appear more polite.'

To western eyes and to western polite behaviour.

I think many foreigners are not too comfortable with having people do things for them on such a regular basis and with such detail and care of service. They therefore tend to overcompensate by being extra polite.

On the other hand locals who are more used to this type of service and the idea of having house help etc etc use waiters and waitresses as one does other staff.

I don't know if 'look down at restaurant staff' is the right choice of words. 'Use the staff as staff' may be more correct.

The western custom, whereby the staff are part of the family and everybody knows each others name and some family history is not followed here.

Rude people are rude people, wherever they live or come from.

They are not bound by any nationality, creed or race.

I try to be polite and courteous throughout my daily life it is surprising how better things in general work out.

[sbk]

'Come across as being pretty rude'

'appear more polite.'

To western eyes and to western polite behaviour.

I think many foreigners are not too comfortable with having people do things for them on such a regular basis and with such detail and care of service. They therefore tend to overcompensate by being extra polite.

On the other hand locals who are more used to this type of service and the idea of having house help etc etc use waiters and waitresses as one does other staff.

I don't know if 'look down at restaurant staff' is the right choice of words. 'Use the staff as staff' may be more correct.

The western custom, whereby the staff are part of the family and everybody knows each others name and some family history is not followed here.

Rude people are rude people, wherever they live or come from.

They are not bound by any nationality, creed or race.

I try to be polite and courteous throughout my daily life it is surprising how better things in general work out.

Well, I can only tell you what my Thai staff think. They think that Thai customers tend to be rude, have bad attitudes, speak impolitely and are extremely bossy and picky. They prefer farang who tend to be more easygoing.

If this is treating staff as "staff" well, then, it is still considered rude by my Thai staff, so maybe it depends on who is on the giving end and who is one the receiving end as to whether or not it is acceptable. Also, I must add, as budget accomodation, we would hardly get thai people who are used to having personal servants. My staff believe they are looked down upon by many of the Thai people who stay here, so who is to say that their feelings are incorrect?

[the swagman]

'Come across as being pretty rude'

'appear more polite.'

To western eyes and to western polite behaviour.

I think many foreigners are not too comfortable with having people do things for them on such a regular basis and with such detail and care of service. They therefore tend to overcompensate by being extra polite.

On the other hand locals who are more used to this type of service and the idea of having house help etc etc use waiters and waitresses as one does other staff.

I don't know if 'look down at restaurant staff' is the right choice of words. 'Use the staff as staff' may be more correct.

The western custom, whereby the staff are part of the family and everybody knows each others name and some family history is not followed here.

Rude people are rude people, wherever they live or come from.

They are not bound by any nationality, creed or race.

I try to be polite and courteous throughout my daily life it is surprising how better things in general work out.

Well, I can only tell you what my Thai staff think. They think that Thai customers tend to be rude, have bad attitudes, speak impolitely and are extremely bossy and picky. They prefer farang who tend to be more easygoing.

If this is treating staff as "staff" well, then, it is still considered rude by my Thai staff, so maybe it depends on who is on the giving end and who is one the receiving end as to whether or not it is acceptable. Also, I must add, as budget accomodation, we would hardly get thai people who are used to having personal servants. My staff believe they are looked down upon by many of the Thai people who stay here, so who is to say that their feelings are incorrect?

I don't dispute what your Thai staff are saying. Farang on the whole do tend to be more easy going. (they're on holidays usually) Thai customers can be rude and demeaning, and can be so very fussy.

As do can farangs. Farnags can also be ignorant and abusive as can all people.

I did not use the term 'personal servants', I said 'house help'. In most Thai households there are usually a whole bunch of people around all the time and each does his or her bit to keep the house. Relatives, relations, friends from the country whatever. 'Personal servants ' are generally limited to the high ranking government officials or generals. (of which there are plenty)

[sbk]

Perhaps you are correct but the Thai people we have had who have behaved this way have treated my staff as their personal servants. Asking them to do personal things for them that would not be done for another guest. So, perhaps they do consider that someone who is working thre works for them, I don't know what they think, I only know what I see and what staff relate to me.

Which is, to be totally frank, that Thai people in my experience tend to treat service staff far more poorly than any farangs that I have seen. This is all my experience and that of my staff but after 5 years in the business, I'd have to say my experiences aren't insignificant.

[the swagman]

Perhaps you are correct but the Thai people we have had who have behaved this way have treated my staff as their personal servants. Asking them to do personal things for them that would not be done for another guest. So, perhaps they do consider that someone who is working thre works for them, I don't know what they think, I only know what I see and what staff relate to me.

Which is, to be totally frank, that Thai people in my experience tend to treat service staff far more poorly than any farangs that I have seen. This is all my experience and that of my staff but after 5 years in the business, I'd have to say my experiences aren't insignificant.

Far too modest sbk.

Out of curiousity, what are the personal things Thai people ususally ask your staff to do?

[kayo]

terry, please don´t put anymore legs on sing sing´s horse.

thank you,

kayo.

[backflip]

Wow. This thread started as "the OP got snubbed by a fellow farang and he's upset", and has "progressed" to "Thais treat people like slaves".

It costs nothing to be polite, in any culture.

[the swagman]

It costs nothing to be polite, in any culture.

Agree.

[Sing_Sling]

terry, please don´t put anymore legs on sing sing´s horse.

thank you,

kayo.

Thanks, kayo! Finally someone who appreciates a real prancing horse.

[jbowman1993]

It costs nothing to be polite, in any culture.

Agree.

I second that motion!