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Dihydrogen Monoxide Levels


lopburi

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:o Last Sunday saw the highest levels of Dihydrogen Monoxide (DHMO) levels in Pattaya. As a retired scientist, I am able to regularly monitor the level of DHMO and despite the extraordinary levels of the substance that evening in Pattaya, no official from the local authority was around to monitor the level for City Hall whilst repeated calls to City Hall went unanswered. This substance is used in the manufacture of plastic cups, electricity, weapons of mass destruction.

The situation was so bad that I thought it unwise to make my weekly visit to the Pink Pussycat Bar in Pattayaland Soi 3 and this visit will have to be delayed until the coming Sunday as i have bridge for the rest of the week.

Can I please ask that Pattaya City Hall has someone on call who is able to monitor the level of DHMO during the weekends and to take the necessary action to reduce the unacceptable levels. If this is not done, I can see hordes of visitors making their way to Hua Hin rather than Pattaya.

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Mr Lopburi,

Now unfortunately there will be again very high levels of DHMO prevalent in Pattaya Friday evening and Saturday... My maybe a little unscientific guess is that this is going to be caused by the temporary ban of products containing C2H5OH, also sometimes referred to as Ethanol, on the streets and public places...

It seems to be the general concencus of the Thai constabulary that the Thai population will not be able to fullfill their civic duties to their fullest extent after consuming large quantities of above mentioned substance.

Thus it is ruled that above substance will be prohibited before and during election days...

Consumation of large quantities of DHMO is indeed not without risks according to Webster's Dictionary:

Necessary to life, excessive consumption can cause headache, confusion, and cramps, and can be fatal in athletes
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For the less scientifically inclined browsing this forum:

Chemists sometimes jokingly refer to water as dihydrogen monoxide or DHMO, the systematic covalent name of this molecule, especially in parodies of chemical research that call for this "lethal chemical" to be banned. The systematic acid name of water is hydroxic acid or hydroxilic acid, although these terms are rarely used.

Also from Webster's

Check out following link as well

The thruth about DHMO

Good one Lopburi,...

You might be interested to head down to Ban Chang or SriRacha this weekend instead of Soi Pattayaland 3 !!!

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lopburi...you know that I respect you....it would have been better to indicate that the the recent drought has caused concern due to lowered reservior levels and river flows. Down here in the delta area we got plenty of water and are generally not aware of upstream problems. I have had my eye on canal levels when I go to tesco 35km away...people are preparing for a third crop now which is not a good idea even with availability of water...

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