Worried_sick Posted September 2, 2006 Share Posted September 2, 2006 I am looking for advice mainly ..My husband and i are seperated and he has a brother who is back and forward to kopanghan and has done so for years ..My husband went to visit him there about 2 months back for 3 weeks and fell in love with the place and the usual met loads of women through his brother !! He has now went back the other day with £20,000 deposit to put on a bit land ..He said hes got top lawyers on the case over there but im not so sure ..His brother has a steady thai girlfriend and seemingly between my husbands brother and his girlfriend they have came up with a great deal seemingly !! I dont know how it all works but they seem to know or think they do and my husband wont listen to sense now ..So now his plans are to go pay the deposit and come back here to the uk and sell everything up he has here to go back permanently and live ...Is it all so simple or is he being silly ?? Really worried about him jumping into it all now !! My boys are devestated also as there going to lose out on there dad now too !! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunbelt Asia Posted September 2, 2006 Share Posted September 2, 2006 A foreigner cannot own land in their name unless they invest 40 million baht in Thailand. Without knowing more about how the land is being acquired, its hard to give a comment, if the method is legal and he would be protected. For eample if he will be putting the land in the brothers girlfriend name. This would not be a good solution unless he does at least a servitude on the property in his name. Even then he needs to be very careful, as the gf could state she was a nominee and have the servitude null and void. Everything should be legal with the understanding, no matter how much protection he has with putting it in a brother gf name, their is risk. Much better to do a long term servitude with the current owner of the land. www.sunbeltasiagroup.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Worried_sick Posted September 2, 2006 Author Share Posted September 2, 2006 (edited) Thanks for replying to me ..He is going on that 49/51% property set up or something he said ..He does not tell me a lot about it as he thinks he is getting a good deal and i am trying to put him off ...I have not slept for days now with all the worry and cant even get in touch with him as dont have a phone number for him right now but he believes/likes to believe everything is fine !! £20,000 is a lot of money about $37,000 think the land in total is costing him about $120,000 can you also tell me if the laws are different for purchasing land in kophangan or are they all the same ..I would hate for him to lose out on money as my children would suffer also if he did ..He said he owns less votes but that the thai people cant vote or something i dont know i just think hes being foolish !! Edited September 2, 2006 by Worried_sick Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
udon Posted September 2, 2006 Share Posted September 2, 2006 Thanks for replying to me ..He is going on that 49/51% property set up or something he said ..He does not tell me a lot about it as he thinks he is getting a good deal and i am trying to put him off ...I have not slept for days now with all the worry and cant even get in touch with him as dont have a phone number for him right now but he believes/likes to believe everything is fine !! £20,000 is a lot of money about $37,000 think the land in total is costing him about $120,000 can you also tell me if the laws are different for purchasing land in kophangan or are they all the same ..I would hate for him to lose out on money as my children would suffer also if he did ..He said he owns less votes but that the thai people cant vote or something i dont know i just think hes being foolish !! Tell him to talk to Greg at Sunbelt, if he doesn't, he's an idiot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Worried_sick Posted September 2, 2006 Author Share Posted September 2, 2006 I can not get hold of him ..He left the uk on tuesday with the cash for deposit telling me hes away to settle his land deal and sit back knowing he is going to be living in paradise after its all done etc ..I dont think going somewhere for 3 weeks and then going back 3 weeks later with a load of money is sensible ..he comes back on the 9th and was hoping to have it all sorted a couple of days ago ..His brother is desperate for this to happen so he can be set up for life for doing nothin basically so has told my husband everything will be fine as its a friend of a friend there getting the land from ...and top lawyers in south of thailand are looking at it all but who knows !! I am kind of hoping it doesnt happen as then my boys will still have there father !! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunbelt Asia Posted September 2, 2006 Share Posted September 2, 2006 can you also tell me if the laws are different for purchasing land in kophangan They are the same. I would hate for him to lose out on money as my children would suffer also if he did ..He said he owns less votes but that the thai people cant vote or something i dont know i just think hes being foolish !! By law, all shares must have voting rights. One class however can have less voting rights than another class. This changes from week to week but in most provinces if a foreigner is a shareholder or a director of a Thai limited company in any way even if its a one share or unauthorized director, the land dept will not allow the land to be registered. Its easier for the officer to say "no" than to investigate if its a real company. Just depends on the land dept. As for the company set up, it can happen but your husband better be getting good advice on how it needs to be legal with real Thai shareholders. Even then, no guarantee the land will be registered. www.sunbeltasiagroup.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Worried_sick Posted September 2, 2006 Author Share Posted September 2, 2006 (edited) Would he find this out before he paid the money or after ?? I just dont understand him anymore but dont want him or my children to lose out ..I dont know where he is getting legal advice from ..Just said top lawyers in the south of thailand ..Just wish i had known about this forum before he went over with all that money !!! I know he also said to me that he would own the land and could then build a house on it and if the island got too busy and they started building shops there etc he could move somewhere else and get really good money back on his property as would be a really popular place and land is getting really expensive ..but i have read over past couple of days there has been changes made/ getting made to land bought by foreign people Edited September 2, 2006 by Worried_sick Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soap Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 if he wants to invest 20 grand after only seeing the place for 3 weeks, its no wonder you are separated, the first chance you get to contact him you should get him to come on thai visa and ask advice from people who have had many years experience of living in thailand. if its not to late it could save him a lot of money Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Khun Jean Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Nice husband. Was that money also yours? And you did not agree with it? Time to go to a lawyer before you and the kids have nothing anymore. Freezing bankaccounts and other assets seems like a good idea now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bcross2001 Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Would he find this out before he paid the money or after ?? I just dont understand him anymore but dont want him or my children to lose out ..I dont know where he is getting legal advice from ..Just said top lawyers in the south of thailand ..Just wish i had known about this forum before he went over with all that money !!! I know he also said to me that he would own the land and could then build a house on it and if the island got too busy and they started building shops there etc he could move somewhere else and get really good money back on his property as would be a really popular place and land is getting really expensive ..but i have read over past couple of days there has been changes made/ getting made to land bought by foreign people Hi - First if the money is your as well - take the advise and get a lawyer to protect your interests - next find out if the company he is dealing with for the real estate is KP Reality - my wife and I came to Koh Phangan and dealt with this company - this resulted in having to hire a lawyer and losing overall about 6 thousand USD - we have also met several other couples who have dealt with KP Reality and lost money - there are so many unreputable real estate companies on Koh Phangan who's only interest is in bilking their customers. As for the land - the land office in Koh Phangan is totally corrupt - with only three weeks on the island your husband is putting everything he has on the line and believe me risking it all. I hope this works out for you and your kids. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bcross2001 Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Thanks for replying to me ..He is going on that 49/51% property set up or something he said ..He does not tell me a lot about it as he thinks he is getting a good deal and i am trying to put him off ...I have not slept for days now with all the worry and cant even get in touch with him as dont have a phone number for him right now but he believes/likes to believe everything is fine !! £20,000 is a lot of money about $37,000 think the land in total is costing him about $120,000 can you also tell me if the laws are different for purchasing land in kophangan or are they all the same ..I would hate for him to lose out on money as my children would suffer also if he did ..He said he owns less votes but that the thai people cant vote or something i dont know i just think hes being foolish !! Tell him to talk to Greg at Sunbelt, if he doesn't, he's an idiot. Who Is Greg? and how do I contact sunbelt?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
udon Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Click on his PM button and send him a msg with yr phone number. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LoveDaBlues Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 $120K land purchase after 3 weeks in Thailand? Put a fork in him....he's done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Worried_sick Posted September 3, 2006 Author Share Posted September 3, 2006 I am ok money wise the money is not mine its all his own...when we seperated he bought me another house and gave me some cash as a settlement we thought we would get back together but it never happened ..Hes been depressed since we split and has just milled about here in the uk ..Were still great friends but he jetted off last month without telling myself or the boys untill he had gone .He went for a break he said ..But came back 3 weeks later in love with the place boasting about all the women etc and how they will do anything to please there man etc ...Like he took a new lease of life ..then before we know it hes back there with a lump sum deposit to buy land ..His plans are to build a house and stay there forever sun...sea and women ...My kids are a bit older there 17 , 18 and 19 and there not wanting him to go so just need to wait and see now !! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
binnsy Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 £20000 IS A LOT OF WEDGE How many RAi is he buying? i can see tears""""""" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sbk Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 As far as I know there are no top lawyers on Koh Phangan. All the lawyers I know of here are associated with the property developers. Sounds to me like your husband has developed the usual newbie island fever and will eventually come to his senses after he has lost everything. Sorry to be the bearer of bad tidings, but I guess all I can say is be grateful you got a house out of it, and you may want to file for divorce now, before comes back to the UK broke and wanting more from you. Sorry I am such a cynic, but I really feel for this poster, what a mess and she and her kids are best out of it as soon as possible. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
udon Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Agree with sbk. Would the brother be hard to find on the island? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chownah Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Worried Sick, Maybe its time to start letting him make his own mistakes and to start working on not letting this upset you. I'm meaning this in a helpful way, not in a harsh way. You say that you are not subject to his financial dealings and that you are seperated and that you will not be getting back together again. Seems like you are overly worried about his affairs. As for the kids......they are old enough that they should start to communicate with their father and express to him themselves about missing him.....or not. I can understand you wanting the kids to have a father around them....why not send them to Thailand?....in any case he is on his own now and beyond your control so best not to let his follies disrupt your life.....in my opinion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sbk Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Agree with sbk.Would the brother be hard to find on the island? Depends on where he lives. In any case, what difference would it make? She already has a good idea what the brother wants, it is up to the husband to be an adult, nothing she can do will make any difference if his mind is set. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Worried_sick Posted September 3, 2006 Author Share Posted September 3, 2006 I understand what your sayin chownah and your right ..My sister told me the same thing last night ..I am still really friendly with him and to be honest before he went to thailand i think we could have set aside our differences and sorted ourselves out and got back together but he is big enough to make his own choices now ...I just find it heartbreaking having to sit back and watch my boys suffer ...My youngest son being the worst not eating or anything ..But then he still has me !! Just have to make the best of a bad situation Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GuestHouse Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 You say you are seperated and you refer to the father of your children as 'your husband'. If he is still your husband then the first thing I would advise you do is contact a lawyer and get a full legal seperation, you may have that already but if you haven't go get it sorted now. If he wishes to pour his own money down the drain there is nothing you can do to stop him, just make sure he doesn't pour any of your money away. On the basis of what you are telling us, he seems to fit the 'recently seperated mddle aged mid life crisis mold'. Thailand will either make him or break him - Just make sure he doesn't put your financial security at risk too. If you want him back, and it sounds as if you do, then wait a while... see what happens. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sbk Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 good advice guesthouse, my guess is she is more worried about her kids financial security than her own, a lawyer may be able to help with that too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Worried_sick Posted September 3, 2006 Author Share Posted September 3, 2006 (edited) I was upset at first about it all but need to let him ride it out ..I am more worried about my son ..not even the financial side but just since coming back the first time from thailand its like hes distanced himself from my youngest son completely and thats not good ..But have thought a lot during the night after reading the replys everybody has so kindly posted and just think if he has to do what he has to do .My son still has me and he will get thru it ..My oldest son stays with his dad and thinks his dad is doing a great thing and also idolises his uncle but he is going to have to come live with me when his dad goes as he is selling all he owns to come thailand so oldest son reckons he will stay with his dad in thailand for 6 months a year and stay in the uk for the other 6..And my middle son ..He has pleaded with him not to go but hes going so nothing we can do ...I have to let it ride now as he wont listen to me anymore he thinks he is doing it for the best so we shall see...Thanks to everybody for there great advice !! Edited September 3, 2006 by Worried_sick Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Khun Jean Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 I think it is your task now to be there for your sons. I mean more than before. I guess your feelings toward your (ex) husband are felt by your sons too. You would have to feel better in this situatio, however difficult this is, and your children will pick up on this. If you accept it, they probably will too. I have a niece and nephew that were "victims" of a divorce. They were a a lot younger tough. The only thing i saw was a sad mother. Ones she got tougher and began her own life it got better. I am not a shrink, but even i could see that. The sooner you can do this the better. The 'mold' guesthouse describes is a very familiar one here. And it looks like he is going for a rollercoaster ride. I wish you the best. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
womble Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Some very wise words here from the member, particulary guest house. Make sure all your assets are safe and he can't get his hands on any of them. If he loses his money, people in Thailand often become desperate as they run out of money, the thought of going home broke is enough to force many into suicide, not saying this will happen of course, but it shows how desperate people can get in Thailand when funds run out, so 1st thing you must do is make assets safe. Secondly trust him to make the right decisions, maybe even let him know that you wish him all the best, but maybe he should try living there for 6 months minimum before he invests, this will give him a chance to get a few things out of the system. Most people go pretty mad in the first 6 months, and they also don't understand the way things work so investment is fraught with challenges. You need some time to figure out who gives good legal advise and who to steer clear of. Also he needs to learn and make the decisions himself, not use his brother experiance, he has no way of knowing if his brother is clued up or not, many people here think they know it all, and they're the ones that loose everything. Hopefully he will take time to learn the correct methods and contacts, and invest wisely and make some $ at the same time as having a happy life. You must make sure you are safe regardless. I think one thing you could do though that may really help him is send him some links to this site. There has been many problems with land in recent weeks, and there is a lot of info on this board. Send him the links so he can read them, then he may not be going into this land deal with his eyes completely closed. You could also send him links to eigher Sunbelt or one of the big international lawyer firms in bangkok that will give good advice, not cheap, but could save him from loosing everything. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Worried_sick Posted September 3, 2006 Author Share Posted September 3, 2006 Have tried telling him what i think and feel and he wont listen ..If im thinking right he will have already parted with the $32,000 on a deposit by now ..according to my son today he set the land up when he was there for his 1st 3 week visit and has now went to pay the money ..He comes back to the uk on the 9th but only tells me what he wants me to hear...I tried telling him different but he knows it all ...told him to try renting and he said he cant ..he has to buy NOW as his brother knows somebody who knows somebody else and there is nearly no land left for sale on the island !!! He wont listen to reason ..Even fell out with my son today over as he thinks his dad and his dads brother cant get stung for money as the brother knows everything with having a thai girlfriend !!! So his choice Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LoveDaBlues Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 For the benefit of others please post when the impending explosion happens. Thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sbk Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 Well, as a long term resident on Koh Phangan, sounds like he is being fed a line. Nearly no land for sale on the island, what a joke. It seems to me that he is getting the old high pressured sales pitch, possibly from his brother, possibly from his brother's girlfriend. Tell your son to read this thread as well, if he thinks its such a great idea, maybe the combined experience of people who have been living here will have some weight. Maybe not, but at least it will show your son that you are actually on your husband's side. Just that he doesn't know it yet. Good luck to you, and remember to protect your own assets as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Worried_sick Posted September 4, 2006 Author Share Posted September 4, 2006 Thanks to everybody that replied to me I have cried non stop since he left and making myself ill ..I cant do it no longer ...Just have to sit back and watch and hope he dont get ripped off ...He wont listen to me or anybody else ..I work beside a woman who lived in thailand for 15yrs with her husbands work and she has tried advising him too but he said to mind her own business ..He is normally a very careful guy and doesnt do anything on a spur i am totally taken aback by him with all this ,,,He just seems like a completely different person since coming back last time ...I dont know whats wrong with him !!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
udon Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 Thailand gives a great first impression to anyone visiting for 2 or 3 weeks. Dig a little and you have to be careful who you associate with & what you do.. One of the main reasons most expats advise newbies never to buy a condo or house in the 1st 12 months....... a lot can happen & you can learn a lot. I hope for your sake he listens to someone before parting with his cash but from what you have related here, it doesn't look good. Good luck & keep us posted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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