Thai opinion: A few tips for the new American ambassador

[webfact]

STOPPAGE TIME
A few tips for the new American ambassador
Tulsathit Taptim

BANGKOK: -- First things first, welcome to Thailand, where a few prime ministers and foreign ministers are expected to come and go during your tenure. It will be both stressful and fun, and your residence will need barricading from time to time, not against suicide bombers, of course, but against Thai protesters who will almost certainly accuse you of leaning towards their opponents in the political conflict.

I just took a couple of international relations courses in university a long way back, so you can ask what on earth I think I know about American diplomacy. Well, I guess I have seen enough to share some thoughts with you. All I can say is that, as much as I want to be a lone voice, to stand out as someone who gives you an extraordinary piece of advice, the truth is that many Thais will tell you the exact same thing.

And that's the whole point. It's not just me. It's many, many Thais. There are many, many other Thais who disagree with the first "many, many Thais", but here's my two cents: Leave both camps alone. It's the first thing on the "To-do list" I've written specifically for you, which you can choose to ignore if you like, of course:

Stay afloat. Turn a blind eye. Don't get involved. Whatever it means, "Avoid it like the plague" in diplomatic terms, do it. I can't tell you not to take sides. Nobody on the face of this planet can be neutral regarding the Thai conflict. You, however, are among an unenviable few who can't be obvious about it.

Call in sick or take a vacation if need be. People will want to see you. All kinds of people. When in doubt, shut the door, pack your suitcase and fly home to watch a baseball game. If you let them see you, the meeting will be tweeted about in seconds, put on Facebook in minutes and splashed across news websites in hours. Comments will follow, and, trust me, you wouldn't want to read or know about half of them.

If you feel the urge to comment on a Thai affair, at least check your local news first. Otherwise, you may end up deploring a Thai activist being taken into temporary custody while missing out on an American cop shooting dead an innocent pedestrian just because he is a big, coloured man.

Take a long hard look at the pictures of the Songkran celebrations. Unruly or over-the-top as they appear, such things don't happen if a country is truly clamped within an iron, dictatorial grip. I'm not saying the current administration is good; I'm only saying there are two ways to portray Thailand - use a textbook or try to look at and understand the realities.

Open your mind. It's natural to be biased against those who bombard your embassy or country with criticism. My advice is that you should treat criticism as a bitter pill and not get too carried away with the compliments. Everybody is using everybody in the Thai conflict.

A lot of fuss will be made out of your association with North Korea, so the lesser said of it, the better. If you feel a return to a civilian rule comes too slowly for your liking, you may disguise yourself as a farang tourist and do a personal survey across the country. Don't trust any poll or what academics on either side tell you. If the outcome of your covert survey is consistent with your frustration, read my advice number 1. Keep this in mind: "If the Russian and Chinese ambassadors can do it, so can I."

In case you really do that personal survey, don't ask questions like "How do you feel now that the suppression of your rights has been extended?" or "Thailand has been relatively peaceful since the coup, without daily bombing of rally sites and traffic-blocking or violent demonstrations, do you like it this way?", not least because the same man can reply "I'm mad" to the first question and "Yes" to the second.

It's okay to tweet or find solace on Facebook, but before your typing fingers can get the better of you, read 1, 3 and 7, or all of the above for that matter. Oh, and there's a very thin line between trolling and lobbyists' work on the social media. I just think you should know that.

When invited to the military government's functions, make good decisions. If you can't avoid it (you've returned from America or there's no interesting baseball game on schedule), make it a quick in-and-out operation. Before you join a gala dinner hosted by the military government, practice an unreadable smile, because you surely will have to take photos with Prayut Chan-o-cha and/or some of his top Cabinet members.

There, that's all I can think of. And again, welcome to Thailand, where your peace of mind will be closely associated with your ability to detach yourself from its unique quest for peace.

Source: http://www.nationmultimedia.com/opinion/A-few-tips-for-the-new-American-ambassador-30258429.html


-- The Nation 2015-04-22

[kalbo123]

This man has experience in North Korea, think he doesn't need advise from a high school grade journalist..

[wangsuda]

In over 80 years of failed "democracy (too many coups, too many constitutions), perhaps it is time for Thailand to take advice. Just saying, like.

Edited April 21, 2015 by wangsuda

[jamesjohnsonthird]

The US Embassy/Ambassador know all about the author and his phoney newspaper, The Nation.

The stuff they print doesn't jive with reality.

Remember the wikileaks? 3,000 emails from the US Embassy back to Washington.

Fascinating stuff that details the reality of Thai politics. The story of the decade and The Nation didn't cover it.

Now you know.

[thesetat2013]

I would say this writer need to go back to school and take more courses on international relations. What a stupid article written by someone who knows absolutely nothing about politica

[BSJ]

This man has experience in North Korea, think he doesn't need advise from a high school grade journalist..

"a high school grade journalist" Stop heaping praise on the author of this diatribe (divisive commentary?), who I though was about 10 years old. A cadet journalist maybe?

[PaullyW]

This man has experience in North Korea, think he doesn't need advise from a high school grade journalist..

The article sums up the typical arrogance here in Thailand. Many people here are truly detached from reality. They just don't understand that there is a world out there MUCH more important and sophisticated and accomplished and powerful and knowledgeable and tough and interesting and full of different culture. You only get articles like this in countries so insular such as Thailand is.

Well, hopefully writing the article made the author feel good. That is about all it is worth.

[Your Thainess]

My goodness, what inane drivel.

[Bellacissa]

I took this as satire and completely tongue in cheek. Like an article from "The Onion" for Thais. Or does that not exist at The Nation?

Forgive my ignorance. I'm just learning what 'Thai media' is all about.

[jamesjohnsonthird]

I took this as satire and completely tongue in cheek. Like an article from "The Onion" for Thais. Or does that not exist at The Nation?

Forgive my ignorance. I'm just learning what 'Thai media' is all about.

Ten years ago, The Nation was tasked to smear/destroy Thaksin and promote military rule.

You see, the backers of the military need to be in control of Thailand on DDay.

The Nation is part of the elaborate ruse. Sad, some Thai Visa posters don't realize this.

[f0xxee]

Amazing! Who would have guessed that Thai-Visa readers, so locked into their hardcore dislike of Thailand would have missed the satire so entirely?

The Author from "The Nation" was ever so gently mocking Thailand along with the usual US Foreign Affair faux pas with this article. (The bit about checking no police in "his" country had shot a big coloured man is both topical and amusingly droll).

You lot are so lost in your negativity it has affected your comprehension, or you have such an overwhelming need to be the first to beat up Thailand you skimmed rather than read the article.

Now have another breakfast beer and try again.

Edit: Spelin

Edited April 22, 2015 by f0xxee

[Bellacissa]

I took this as satire and completely tongue in cheek. Like an article from "The Onion" for Thais. Or does that not exist at The Nation?

Forgive my ignorance. I'm just learning what 'Thai media' is all about.

Ten years ago, The Nation was tasked to smear/destroy Thaksin and promote military rule.

You see, the backers of the military need to be in control of Thailand on DDay.

The Nation is part of the elaborate ruse. Sad, some Thai Visa posters don't realize this.

Interesting... I mean, I take it all with a grain of salt anyway - I come from the homeland of sensationalized, biased media. I'm just trying to learn how to tell what pieces (if any) are truth and what is made up, la-la land, 'tell us what they want us to hear' stuff in this place.

I'll get there, eventually.

[LannaGuy]

talk about bias this 'journo' is clueless

[Trentham]

This statement in paragraph 4 "Nobody on the face of this planet can be neutral regarding the Thai conflict" says a lot about about the arrogance of many elite Thai. They think they are the centre of the universe where in truth, half of the world does not know where Thailand is and most of the rest do not care.

[thedude82]

this is why "thai opinion" holds no weight outside of its own very small "kingdom"

[DepDavid]

Literate in his own mind I guess!

[NCC1701A]

try writing a letter like this to the Russian Ambassador, see what happens.

[Tywais]

I took this as satire and completely tongue in cheek. Like an article from "The Onion" for Thais. Or does that not exist at The Nation?

Forgive my ignorance. I'm just learning what 'Thai media' is all about.

Have to admit that I had to check that it wasn't from notthenation.

[Nemesis7]

Seriously ?!?!? Why the hell on earth would an US envoy take those silly tips? And do you think he wasn't briefed prior his assignment on the dos's and don't 's?!?!!

[saminoz]

Post deleted when I realised I just didn't care.

Edited April 22, 2015 by saminoz

[Fullstop]

In a nutshell ...

"You Falang. I Thai. You no unnerstan. Shut mout"

[ldiablo]

I am so so happy that this article was written today because I realized when i woke up that i was out of toilet paper.

[No Apologist]

I took this as satire and completely tongue in cheek. Like an article from "The Onion" for Thais. Or does that not exist at The Nation?

Forgive my ignorance. I'm just learning what 'Thai media' is all about.

I almost did myself. But sadly, instead of the onion, I think what you're looking at here is the equivalent of Sean Hannity / Fox News.

This is a PM controlled 'news site' (The Nation) and they regularly print pro-Junta drivel like this. It's clearly designed to take advantage of Thai ignorance and fuel anti-western'ism.

[lostoday]

If you think this one is bad read his other one, "A boy's crash course on Russia, America and China" that really displays his cluelessness.

[No Apologist]

Amazing! Who would have guessed that Thai-Visa readers, so locked into their hardcore dislike of Thailand would have missed the satire so entirely?

The Author from "The Nation" was ever so gently mocking Thailand along with the usual US Foreign Affair faux pas with this article. (The bit about checking no police in "his" country had shot a big coloured man is both topical and amusingly droll).

You lot are so lost in your negativity it has affected your comprehension, or you have such an overwhelming need to be the first to beat up Thailand you skimmed rather than read the article.

Now have another breakfast beer and try again.

Edit: Spelin

My friend, I've lived in Thailand for 5 years. And, I'm afraid that this isn't 'sarcasm' at all, sadly. The way that extreme right-wing pundits in the US aren't sarcasm, either. The opions expressed regularly in The Nation are so ignorant so 110% pro-Junta, that this is just another ridiculous propaganda article. It doesn't care what we think of it on TV, but rather how it can manipulate the country.

[quandow]

A weak attempt at humor, this is merely droll.

[No Apologist]

If you think this one is bad read his other one, "A boy's crash course on Russia, America and China" that really displays his cluelessness.

Is it the same fool who wrote that one...I think about 6 months ago, where the boy comes home from school and asks his learned father why the US/EU are so evil and don't understand how great martial law is? ha I'm guessing yes

Edited April 22, 2015 by No Apologist

[lostoday]

If you think this one is bad read his other one, "A boy's crash course on Russia, America and China" that really displays his cluelessness.

Is it the same fool who wrote that one...I think about 6 months ago, where the boy comes home from school and asks his learned father why the US/EU are so evil and don't understand how great martial law is? ha I'm guessing yes

Yes the guy is a loon. Short for looney.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?hl=en-GB&gl=SG&v=F9S7yhD5M9A

[oyster]

I would say this writer need to go back to school and take more courses on international relations. What a stupid article written by someone who knows absolutely nothing about politica

But he does appear to know quite a bit about people.....

"Call in sick or take a vacation if need be. People will want to see you. All kinds of people. When in doubt, shut the door, pack your suitcase and fly home to watch a baseball game. If you let them see you, the meeting will be tweeted about in seconds, put on Facebook in minutes and splashed across news websites in hours. Comments will follow, and, trust me, you wouldn't want to read or know about half of them."

And that sounds rather like Major Major Major from Catch 22, and I would imagine being the American Ambassador to Thailand would be a classic Catch 22 situation.

[slipperylobster]

This man has experience in North Korea, think he doesn't need advise from a high school grade journalist..

Indeed, the OP has the insight of child....when it comes to international relationships.

Number 1....is thinking the Ambassador even has any power to pick sides at all.

So why mention that.

Number 2....The Ambassador is merely a spokesperson, not a policy maker....with additional duties of overseeing American Services for those Americans abroad.

A good smile and a firm handshake/proper wai.....will be the best advice.