BuffaloRescue Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 Hi Im looking to help a friend (farang girl) She's BPD. She's getting concealing but she needs additional support. I was thinking maybe a support group or someone who could offer her some advice. Ive set my own boundaries with her and need to keep her a bit at arms length. What can I do for her? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
taotoo Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 Dress her up in a buffalo costume and do your usual thing. Alternatively perhaps encourage her to go back to her home country if help is available there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMBob Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 Sorry you get a response such as above. Likely you'd get a decent answer at Suan Proong Hospital, the psychiatric hospital just outside the southeast corner of the old city. They'd surely know of any support groups around as well as any private psychologists (or, perhaps, a talented social worker). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeverSure Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 This is a nasty thing. Apart from getting her to a qualified mental health professional and perhaps on some meds there's nothing you can do. Remember, she has to want help. Even in the US with "the best" possible help, these people often don't improve except under meds which often make them a zombie. If I was you I'd recommend help and then get far, clear away. She could suck you into some of her "games" and mess you up too. I know, I know, they are often the very best in bed... Hard to let go of. I dated one for about a month until I figured out what she was. It was the first time I'd ever heard of the disorder. What a month, LOL. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
taotoo Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 Sorry you get a response such as above. Likely you'd get a decent answer at Suan Proong Hospital, the psychiatric hospital just outside the southeast corner of the old city. They'd surely know of any support groups around as well as any private psychologists (or, perhaps, a talented social worker). And I'm sorry you got a response such as the above. The best place for any westerner in the third-world with a mental health issue is normally back home - it probably won't be sufficiently managed on a pay-as-you-go basis, nor by a local support group. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amexpat Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 ^ That's called doubling down. Except for the buffalo costume? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cyberfarang Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 Does she want help and would she be willing even if a specialist was recommended to her? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
orang37 Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 And, how is it that you are qualified and competent to make a "psychiatric" diagnosis ? Does she say she has a problem ? Is she asking for help ? ~o:37; Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NancyL Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 This is a serious illness and unless she has been properly diagnosed and wants to work on getting better then there is nothing the OP can do to help. While I'm no professional, it would seem that Chiang Mai attracts more than it's fair share of people with this disorder into it's expat community: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_personality_disorder If she's already been diagnosed then yes, there is help available at Suan Prung and also at CM Ram hospital. Otherwise, I'd encourage her to return to her home country for initial diagnosis. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
taotoo Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 ^ That's called doubling down. Except for the buffalo costume? Given his arms' length comment I'm sure he can handle a little levity. Presumably you'll be posting something more helpful to the OP shortly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MaeJoMTB Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 Almost every woman I ever met turned out to be a whack job. You can't help them all, and trying to help usually gets you accused of stalking or worse, so just walk away. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MisterTee Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 And, how is it that you are qualified and competent to make a "psychiatric" diagnosis ? Does she say she has a problem ? Is she asking for help ? ~o:37; Good point. Almost every woman I ever met turned out to be a whack job. You can't help them all, and trying to help usually gets you accused of stalking or worse, so just walk away. Your first line could be qualified as, "Almost every woman I ever met" - in a bar, or wandering around rootless in foreign countries - "turned out to be a whack job." Your second line is on the money. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
connda Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 (edited) Exactly how is her BPD manifesting itself, ie, symptom? If she is truly having psychological problems or a break-down, she needs to return home or to another Western country for treatment. Trying to get treatment from a third-world psychiatrist who hasn't been totally immersed and inculcated in Western culture, imho, is simply asking for additional problems. Edited October 5, 2015 by connda Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nithisa78 Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 Almost every woman I ever met turned out to be a whack job. You can't help them all, and trying to help usually gets you accused of stalking or worse, so just walk away. I'd guess based on your own statement, you're the whack job. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NancyL Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 Exactly how is her BPD manifesting itself, ie, symptom? If she is truly having psychological problems or a break-down, she needs to return home or to another Western country for treatment. Trying to get treatment from a third-world psychiatrist who hasn't been totally immersed and inculcated in Western culture, imho, is simply asking for additional problems. Actually, there are western-trained psychiatrists in Chiang Mai, who speak excellent English and have access to the latest medications. However, someone has to be committed to wanting to get better because you don't have all the support services available here that you would have in the west and these psychiatrists, despite their western training, don't "push" their patients as hard as therapists would in the west. That's why I asked if the OP's friend had actually been diagnosed with the condition and had already had a course of treatment prescribed? If not, then the person needs to return to her home country. It could be difficult to get up an initial program, esp if the person is reluctant to seek treatment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BuffaloRescue Posted October 8, 2015 Author Share Posted October 8, 2015 Yes she's diagnosed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMKiwi Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 Almost every woman I ever met turned out to be a whack job. You can't help them all, and trying to help usually gets you accused of stalking or worse, so just walk away. Almost every woman huh? What's that saying.... Birds of a feather flock together! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greydog Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 ^ That's called doubling down. Except for the buffalo costume? Given his arms' length comment I'm sure he can handle a little levity. Presumably you'll be posting something more helpful to the OP shortly. A little levity, huh? You really are special, aren't you? Almost unique. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cmbe Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 http://psychcentral.com/lib/how-to-help-a-loved-one-with-borderline-personality-disorder-part-1/ or https://books.google.co.th/books?id=ubsdAAAAQBAJ&lpg=PT10&ots=mxJJZ4dKJp&dq=suggestion%20for%20borderline%20personality%20disorder%20in%20Thailand&lr&hl=th&pg=PA1#v=onepage&q&f=false Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BuffaloRescue Posted October 10, 2015 Author Share Posted October 10, 2015 Its a very serious mental disease with 20% chance of suicide no laughing matter thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chicog Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 I knew a couple of girls that suffered with this; it was awful to watch. Thailand is definitely not the place for them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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