I want to marry, but I afraid ;)

[Daniel Boon]

1. prenup

2. get her to pay all costs associated with her expatriation to Poland

3. have a full set of STD tests completed upon her arrival in your country

4. continue using a condom for 6 months and then retest re 3. above

test for STD? what .. did you sleep with her?

I am pretty sure all prospective wives from other countries have to have a full medical before being allowed residency

[Daniel Boon]

You will figure it out one way or another.

Meantime, let me forewarn you : The wife will go stir crazy in Poland as she will be so far removed from all and everything Thai she will turn frustrated and moody and when that happens .....you will be on the receiving end of a Thai women who is not happy living in a strange and foreign environment.

You will see, as sooner or later the Thai wife will not be happy about a lot of things about living in Poland....and that will include not happy with you who she will be blaming for her situation and all her frustrations.

95% of Thai women do not do well outside their tight little circle of Thainess and all that is needed to make them comfortable and

happy ( Sabai, Sabai)...

Sooner or later she will become home sick and distraught and want to be back in Thailand

Just letting you know.

Cheers

gemguy is right ... unless you start sourcing the Thai meeting places near where you live ...maybe even source some part time work in a Thai restaurant (worked for my Wife and I)

[AdamRich]

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

[crazykopite]

Polish chicks are awesome , what the hell are you doing wanting to marry a Thai for from what I see of my friends lives once they married a Thai they all ended up except for one being burnt and going back home broken men !!!!

[Digitalnomade]

you have nothing to win. why you want be married? to make babies? . I am with a Thai lady for 6 years and first thing I said was" I don't want be married because I know you will sue me one day and I will finish on the street "

so far so good.

I asked if she want come to India where life is cheaper, she said no.

at the end, come to Thailand and stay on a tourist visa, go home time to time . don't get married, have a nice life, ... and that s all. because believe, once people got your hand on your money and your life , you will become a slave. forced to work and wake-up early to make sh.. t money that you will never see anyway. you will become miserable, and your life will finish as an alcoholic like many farangs in Pattaya

Edited December 1, 2015 by Digitalnomade

[fred Kubasa]

Stay afraid, very afraid, believe the horror stories, ( true ), out number

the successes by 20 to 1 !

[F4UCorsair]

Stay afraid, very afraid, believe the horror stories, ( true ), out number

the successes by 20 to 1 !

Only 20 to one??

I believe the percentage of Filipino women/western men marriages that survive is significantly higher than other Asian women/western men unions.

English is widely spoken in the Philippines, so communication is better, and that could be one reason. Filipinos settle better in foreign countries also.

I often joke about what a western man and Asoan woman talk about for the remaining 23.5 hours, when the f****ng is over.

Edited December 1, 2015 by F4UCorsair

[cobbler]

Cobblet said,

Ha white women ,i wouldnt piss on them. The lawyers want you to fight because they make a good living when you fight. Western world is for women. Asia is for men.

You sound as though you've been badly beaten in the Family Law Court, and think it was unfair; i did also. Lawyers, and it follow judges, think differently, and everything is in accordance with the LAW. I think you will disagree. They don't make the laws, just administer them, and I'm not defending lawyers.

On white women, they take advantage/are victims of the system. If family law in Australia was the same as in Thailand, you'd feel you were getting a better deal.

Incidentally, it was a very different Family Law Act until the early/mid 70's when the then Attorney General Lionel Murphy, another labor (left wing idiot) turned it all upside down, giving women a far better deal, and the Family Law Act its alternative name, 'Murphy's Law'.

f4Ucorsair agree with 99.9% of what you just said

[Ghostnigel]

I love the way everybody is offering advice like, "you should get to know her first" and "live with her first"....what is he? 8 yrs old?

One guy said "you obviously don't know thai girls very well"...blah blah blah.....

To me, he does know what thai girls ARE like, thats why he has concerns over the marriage. I say, if your head says beware, listen to it. just remember, men don't have enough blood in their bodies to run 2 things at once, if you get my drift?

[theguyfromanotherforum]

I am suspecting this to be a troll post. Polish people can construct a decent sentences in English while the title of this post is written in Tinglish.

Every eastern European would not write a sentence "I afraid".

[cobbler]

BWHHHHHHHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA

[flossiebear]

What an awful view of marriage. Money , money, money talk. Something is amiss,,which is why you are worried. You are now looking for ways and advice to try and convince you of what you already know.

[cobbler]

What an awful view of marriage. Money , money, money talk. Something is amiss,,which is why you are worried. You are now looking for ways and advice to try and convince you of what you already know.

its sad but unfortunately true. It pays to be very careful.

Cheers Cobbler

[JHolmesJr]

What an awful view of marriage. Money , money, money talk.

Haven't you heard...

Matrimony is a matter of money.

[Digitalnomade]

why you want marry anyway? just to get a visa for her? .. marriage is a blackmail created by our government. if you are not married, she can not get a visa to travel with you.

less you sign, better you are.

[Kenny202]

don't get marry if you are already planning the divorce. you should make sure you are compatible to each other, and work to walk the path of mutual understanding and acceptance.

I dont believe that's true. These girls can be angels,, sometimes for years but as soon as u put your goolies in the vice, Ur ass is theirs....and they know it. They're all on the Internet networking and have all the drill down pat so if she doesn't know the game someone will tell her. I'm not saying they're all bad like that but I've seen 3 examples of 180 degree turnaround in personality, one first hand... after a year or two of the best acting ever seen. My belief is u have to keep the upper hand somehow or Ur gone Edited December 2, 2015 by Kenny202

[AlexRRR]

Women will cost you one way or the other.....they don't come free....you have to maintain that relationship and its usually you paying in some form or other....

Me im not getting married again...and i stand my ground, I'm not tight and i spend money on the babe, she's not going to get any rights or assets from me but if she's a good girl i will leave her a fair share.

[stapoz]

Thanks all for comments. About age: I'm 46 she's 30. I think staying her in Poland is not so big problem as some of you think. There are 2 or 3 thai ladies (wifes of Poles) nearby - she were contacting with them during last stay in Poland (summer time). I think there are several more in my city.

But there is a problem with her mother. Her mother seems to be a money vulture. During talking about a marriage, first she asked for a engagement with gold or money (more less 50.000 . Then, after I went back Poland and start talking seriously about the marriage, she said 1.000.000 B as sin sod - I don't know if this was a silly request to get better position in negotiations or she really thought I could give such a money? I said I will not pay sin sod at all or pay a small about just for a tradition (eg. 50.000 - as I think I can give 50-100.000 B for a marriage/wedding. I also gave a proposal of a sin sod "for show" - so it will be returned after the wedding. - but not an answer. All negotiations were made through my gf, who seems to be forced to ask about money rather that she want the money herself.

I’m ready to support my wife, pay everything for her it’s not an issue for me - she doesn’t need to work - not a problem at all. But I’m completely not ready, and probably will never be, to send any of my money to her mother - it’s not my tradition and for me it’s like throw away money.

As some of you said, my gf will want to support her mother for life - I can see it, she showed me this many times. At the beginning she asked if I can pay her mother few thousand bath every month (I denied). I also agree the shop is her life, as she extend and equip it from time to time (even that we talk about she will have to live it and stay in Poland), spending there almost all time - sometimes was urge by mother to come back to show when we went outside together.

From the other hand she din't refuse to pay sometimes when we stayed together, not only waiting for my money.

A word about having a girl from my country. In Poland I can have a divorced, lady at least in her 40, tired by life and full of purports. Thanks for this but I'd rather stay alone than get such a "polish bird".

After reading the advices, and think all this over, I'm almost decided to wait with the marriage (but not surrender). She is a good girl, take care about my house, never had any signal of looking at other man. The unusual issue is that she has never ever been angry to me during these last 2 years (even I quarrel with her she was calm always) - which had never happen with any of previous girls (thai too).

I will want to take her to Poland for a 6-9 months and then decide later - mainly because of her mother issue, which I wrote at the beginning.

Edited December 2, 2015 by stapoz

[AlexRRR]

Good move that you will take your time.....Mum might be the issue that will cause you issues....since your TGF won't need to work unless she wants to i would assume you would give her some "spending money" if thats the case keeping tongue firmly in cheek is the way for you to go even if its not palatable for you if and I'm sure she will send some of it home..

Anywhere in the world its the same....same....stay out of family affairs your not blood.

[Kenny202]

I know its a shame mate but don't marry her and don't give the old bitch anything. I see it so much here in Isaan (not all families). I know a bloke in your very position

at the moment. He's tried to do all the right things because "he understands its her culture". Built the home for the greedy mum and dad to show off (cost him three times the actual price) on their land. She's sending money back home without the husbands knowledge. They'll be at her hammer and tongs to pressure you for more money and if not either stay long enough to get citizenship or find a new bloke with deeper pockets. Even if you do everything they ask of you they will hold you in no regard and just form the opinion it will be easier to get more out of you in the future. A family like that is just not a good start and it will end in disaster. Just another word of caution too. A legally registered marriage here means the girl can apply to my country (Australia) for a settlement from your Australian assets similar to what an Australian wife would get back home. I can't imagine any other country but Australia would be stupid enough to expose their citizens like that but worth checking.

Other thing worth noting is these girls can put on the act for years if necessary. I don't know ur lady or your situation and she may be a sweetheart but bare in mind once you got your pills in the vice or you've outlived your usefulness, the sweet personality can turn 100%

Edited December 2, 2015 by Kenny202

[aronp1]

If you are thinking about divorce before you are even married! She is not the ONE.

If you love each other and know it is meant to be, divorce shouldn't be anywhere near a thought in your head.

[Digitalnomade]

if you are crazy for a girl, you would be already married and have 3 babies...

you know what? forget about it... take a deep breath and delay all your marriage ideas for 1 year or 2. you will thank me soon.

[Kenny202]

If you are thinking about divorce before you are even married! She is not the ONE.

If you love each other and know it is meant to be, divorce shouldn't be anywhere near a thought in your head.

That's just not true. Blind faith. I've been deeply in love twice, totally sure of everything and ended in divorce. People change. You have a lot more than her I assume, get a pre nup or better still avoid marriage Edited December 2, 2015 by Kenny202

[Thongkorn]

I did not have to ask anybody about marrying my Thai wife, I knew all the pitfalls about thai women before i married her, I was never going to get married but she got me at the age of 53, my first marriage and a big step for me, Fortunately she is a gem, She works in the UK, her choice she sends a little money home , thats the Thai way of taking care of her parent, Her Family have not asked for sinsot, or one baht, Maybe i was just lucky in finding her, there are some Good Thai women about , just take time to know them. I will say, i told my wife that if she lies once to me its bye bye, and the same for her, If she finds me lying she can have half of everything, I trust her with anyhting, Don't get married for the sake of trying to keep her becasue Marriage to some means nothing. I would advise taking her for a holiday to your Country first, just to see if she can cope with your lifestyle and weather.

[thaiduncankk]

I did not have to ask anybody about marrying my Thai wife, I knew all the pitfalls about thai women before i married her, I was never going to get married but she got me at the age of 53, my first marriage and a big step for me, Fortunately she is a gem, She works in the UK, her choice she sends a little money home , thats the Thai way of taking care of her parent, Her Family have not asked for sinsot, or one baht, Maybe i was just lucky in finding her, there are some Good Thai women about , just take time to know them. I will say, i told my wife that if she lies once to me its bye bye, and the same for her, If she finds me lying she can have half of everything, I trust her with anyhting, Don't get married for the sake of trying to keep her becasue Marriage to some means nothing. I would advise taking her for a holiday to your Country first, just to see if she can cope with your lifestyle and weather.

And how old is your 'arrangement' ?

[JHolmesJr]

One thing to bear in mind generally.

Farangs in thailand: bingo players

Thai girls: poker players

[cobbler]

I know its a shame mate but don't marry her and don't give the old bitch anything. I see it so much here in Isaan (not all families). I know a bloke in your very position

at the moment. He's tried to do all the right things because "he understands its her culture". Built the home for the greedy mum and dad to show off (cost him three times the actual price) on their land. She's sending money back home without the husbands knowledge. They'll be at her hammer and tongs to pressure you for more money and if not either stay long enough to get citizenship or find a new bloke with deeper pockets. Even if you do everything they ask of you they will hold you in no regard and just form the opinion it will be easier to get more out of you in the future. A family like that is just not a good start and it will end in disaster. Just another word of caution too. A legally registered marriage here means the girl can apply to my country (Australia) for a settlement from your Australian assets similar to what an Australian wife would get back home. I can't imagine any other country but Australia would be stupid enough to expose their citizens like that but worth checking.

Other thing worth noting is these girls can put on the act for years if necessary. I don't know ur lady or your situation and she may be a sweetheart but bare in mind once you got your pills in the vice or you've outlived your usefulness, the sweet personality can turn 100%

scarey stuff

[thaiduncankk]

I know its a shame mate but don't marry her and don't give the old bitch anything. I see it so much here in Isaan (not all families). I know a bloke in your very position

at the moment. He's tried to do all the right things because "he understands its her culture". Built the home for the greedy mum and dad to show off (cost him three times the actual price) on their land. She's sending money back home without the husbands knowledge. They'll be at her hammer and tongs to pressure you for more money and if not either stay long enough to get citizenship or find a new bloke with deeper pockets. Even if you do everything they ask of you they will hold you in no regard and just form the opinion it will be easier to get more out of you in the future. A family like that is just not a good start and it will end in disaster. Just another word of caution too. A legally registered marriage here means the girl can apply to my country (Australia) for a settlement from your Australian assets similar to what an Australian wife would get back home. I can't imagine any other country but Australia would be stupid enough to expose their citizens like that but worth checking.

Other thing worth noting is these girls can put on the act for years if necessary. I don't know ur lady or your situation and she may be a sweetheart but bare in mind once you got your pills in the vice or you've outlived your usefulness, the sweet personality can turn 100%

scarey stuff

He is scary stuff !

[thaiduncankk]

I know its a shame mate but don't marry her and don't give the old bitch anything. I see it so much here in Isaan (not all families). I know a bloke in your very position

at the moment. He's tried to do all the right things because "he understands its her culture". Built the home for the greedy mum and dad to show off (cost him three times the actual price) on their land. She's sending money back home without the husbands knowledge. They'll be at her hammer and tongs to pressure you for more money and if not either stay long enough to get citizenship or find a new bloke with deeper pockets. Even if you do everything they ask of you they will hold you in no regard and just form the opinion it will be easier to get more out of you in the future. A family like that is just not a good start and it will end in disaster. Just another word of caution too. A legally registered marriage here means the girl can apply to my country (Australia) for a settlement from your Australian assets similar to what an Australian wife would get back home. I can't imagine any other country but Australia would be stupid enough to expose their citizens like that but worth checking.

Other thing worth noting is these girls can put on the act for years if necessary. I don't know ur lady or your situation and she may be a sweetheart but bare in mind once you got your pills in the vice or you've outlived your usefulness, the sweet personality can turn 100%

scarey stuff

He is scary stuff !

I think the word is disallutional, but then again, I am not an Aussie.

[mrfaroukh]

If you want to live happy don't marry. There is no need in having a piece of paper. If you love the person and she love you too then just live together just as you are married and no one own the other person. Behave as if you are married and have respect for your partner.

No matter if your partner can have access to your assets outside Thailand or not, but what you will have here will be hers one way or the other. Yes if you buy a house and you divorce it will be divided but who will buy that property.

Choice is yours