goodguy Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 Thai wife has a nine year old daughter to a Thai Ex-Husband. He pays nothing to the family for the upkeep of the daughter he fathered. The daughter, lives with the wife's parents over there in Issan. She is on the Wife's Mum and Dad's Tattee-an-bahn and lived at their place since she was 3 months old. They are only rice farmers cum cattle breeders (about 42 head). Annual income about 60,000 Baht. They are in debt and spend most of their income before they get it. Do the Thai's have anything like the "Normal World" where the ex-husband has to pay maintence for the kids left in the hands of the Mother/Mother's Parents? What amount of money is the norm for raising a daughter in the country in Issan? Goodguy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest IT Manager Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 Suppose it would be a bit silly to suspect there is another option to living on a farm in Issan. I haven't heard of a maintenance situation legally speaking but I may be wrong. Let's face it, been a long time since I saw any one take responsibility for their actions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluecat Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 Thai wife has a nine year old daughter to a Thai Ex-Husband. He pays nothing to the family for the upkeep of the daughter he fathered. The daughter, lives with the wife's parents over there in Issan. Congratulations, you found the 10th...million one. Maybe, you'll get a prize. Worth inquiring,... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GuestHouse Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 There is no way a Thai guy is going to pay for his kid, especially if the mother has a new farang husband. The next thing you have to watch out for is the Thai guy using the child as a way of getting money out of you. After that, if you buy property in Thailand in your wife's name, her daughter will be the heir to her money and property. So let's say you buy a house and a bit of land, perhaps a car and you put it all in your wife's name. Now your wife dies before you do, the daughter will inherit and you will be extremely lucky if her Thai faher doesn't turn up as the legal gardian and clean you out. The Thai guy ripping off your wife's family is the least of your worries. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
possom Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 The Thai guy ripping off your wife's family is the least of your worries. q Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluecat Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 The Thai guy ripping off your wife's family is the least of your worries. q Your postings are fast improving, Possom. Keep up the good work,... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
possom Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 i will try again !!!! ( dont think ill ever get used to using a computer ) i wanted to say this is very true !! i and many others no doubt are in a similar situation .YOU CAN NOT GET BLOOD OUT OF A STONE !!!!!!!!!!!! if hes got nothing ,he will give nothing . everyones situation will vary a little , personally , i do not provide much to the child ,and make it clear i am NOT the father and if things are needed he should provide . try the abusive aproach , ask him why he wont provide ,has he got no BALLS !!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluecat Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 I liked your previous posting better. But it's OK, I won't comment too much on this one. Just one little comment. Does the fact that a child is not your child make him less of a child? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
possom Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 Does the fact that a child is not your child make him less of a child? q ??????????????????? i really dont understand that ?????? no ,he is still a child ( just ) but does the fact that he is a child make him my responsibility ?????? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sbk Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 try the abusive aproach , ask him why he wont provide ,has he got no BALLS !!! How long have you been in Thailand Possum? Don't you know that in many parts of the country this is a good way to find yourself dead? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluecat Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 How long have you been in Thailand Possum? Don't you know that in many parts of the country this is a good way to find yourself dead? And please, believe her, she is not at all joking,... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluecat Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 i really dont understand that ?????? no ,he is still a child ( just ) but does the fact that he is a child make him my responsibility ?????? Are you living with the mother of the child? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
possom Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 yes ,i live with the mother of the child , ( NOT MY CHILD !!!!) he is not my responsibility , he is schooled , fed and clothed , why should i be afraid to tell some USELESS ###### TO PROVIDE FOR HIS SON THE THINGS HE WANTS !!!!there are many reasons to end up dead in every part of the world for thousands of reasons , maybe the father in question is not the only one without balls ????? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluecat Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 Touchy subject, it seems. Anyway, you live with her. You want to make her happy. Right? Her happiness will sure be very dependent of her son's happiness. It's not your son. Ok. It's her's. The father is a ######. OK. So, leave her,... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
possom Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 Touchy subject, it seems.Anyway, you live with her. You want to make her happy. Right? Her happiness will sure be very dependent of her son's happiness. It's not your son. Ok. It's her's. The father is a ######. OK. So, leave her,... this is not a touchy subject , she is perfectly happy , son is perfectly happy the ONE thing you have right is father is a c**t . NOW PLEASE DO INFORM ME WHY I SHOULD LEAVE HER ,YOU OBVIOUSLY KNOW SOMETHING I DONT BLUECAT ???????????? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
davethailand Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 you definatley ain't got it yet have you possom, the thai father 9 times out of 10 ain' gonna give ###### all, part of the package of having a longterm thai girlfriend or wife is that you will have to take care of their kids, full stop thats the way it is. the father will laugh at you, if he does'nt give you a kickin first. sorry mate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
taxexile Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 hey possum, didnt you know anything about this before you moved in with her,and if not why not ? it amazes me how many farangs "move in with" or marry girls, yet have no idea whatsoever about the girls wider circumstances,her family background,how many relatives she has to support (the number will in some cases double as soon as a farang comes on the scene, again this will depend upon the family background.) or how many children she has farmed out to various relatives to take care of until she has found an income stream (farang) generous enough to meet her needs. you have said little about her background. if you have been here a while then you will often be able to tell a lot about the family background from the speech patterns and thai vocabulary used, its the same in any country. do they use polite thai in everyday speech and when addressing others, or is the conversation peppered with obscenities and impolite usage to others, these things will tell you a lot about their levels of responsibility to each other, to new family members and friends and to other members of society that they have to deal with. what does her ex-husband do for a living, you must have known about him before you moved in with her and that he was not providing for the child. methinks you havent been doing enough research, knowledge is power. you cant take it out on the child by not supporting him/her. its part of the baggage that came along with the girl you love. but aggression towards the ex-husband is probably the quickest way to find out all about the family background,one way or another. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluecat Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 this is not a touchy subject , she is perfectly happy , son is perfectly happy the ONE thing you have right is father is a c**t . NOW PLEASE DO INFORM ME WHY I SHOULD LEAVE HER ,YOU OBVIOUSLY KNOW SOMETHING I DONT BLUECAT ???????????? Ok, Possom, I think I know something you do not know. But it does not matter. If you do not want such kind of "problem" with your girlfriend/wife, please find one who does not have any children. I mean from another one than you, of course,... Is it THAT difficult,... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
possom Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 everybody here must know my life better than i do !!!!!!!!!! YOU ARE NOT LISTENING !!!!!!!!!!! i know all the details , knew them along , all about father ,but this doesnt make me responsible ,family understand my position and he is the ###### to them ,NOT ME <HE IS THE FATHER !!!!!!!! i know full well he doesnt give a shit ,that doesnt make me responsible and yes 9 times out of ten ,some farang guy will be paying for kids of some ###### ... I AM THE 1 IN 10 !!! as for giving me a kicking i am waiting for this piece of shit , and i am 10 years younger than him Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
possom Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 this is not a touchy subject , she is perfectly happy , son is perfectly happy the ONE thing you have right is father is a c**t . NOW PLEASE DO INFORM ME WHY I SHOULD LEAVE HER ,YOU OBVIOUSLY KNOW SOMETHING I DONT BLUECAT ???????????? Ok, Possom, I think I know something you do not know. But it does not matter. If you do not want such kind of "problem" with your girlfriend/wife, please find one who does not have any children. I mean from another one than you, of course,... Is it THAT difficult,... bluecat ,please tell me what the problem is that i have with my wife girlfriend ??????? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
taxexile Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 as for giving me a kicking i am waiting for this piece of shit , and i am 10 years younger than him if you insult him enough so that he loses face you think he would just come to fight you one to one. doesnt work like that. the hurt will fester in him for a day or two. then him and a pal or three, at night when you least expect it. possum, if you like the girl then start liking the child,and make him part of the family.look after him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluecat Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 possum, if you like the girl then start liking the child,and make him part of the family.Look after him. I coud not have said it better,... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
davethailand Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 as for giving me a kicking i am waiting for this piece of shit , and i am 10 years younger than him if you insult him enough so that he loses face you think he would just come to fight you one to one.doesnt work like that. the hurt will fester in him for a day or two. then him and a pal or three, at night when you least expect it. possum, if you like the girl then start liking the child,and make him part of the family.look after him. exactly do you think the husband gives a toss how young and strong you are, no way, if you love her then whats the problem Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sbk Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 Fair enough Possum, you want to end up full of holes that is your choice but it is very bad advice to give the original poster. Taxexile has it exactly right, you are not fighting this one man but him, his brother, his cousin and his uncle. Ten years younger doesn't make any difference at all when you are at the receiving end of a bullet. To the original poster, goodguy, this woman you married was looking for someone to help her take care of her child and you're it. If you are happy in the relationship and love her then the child is part and parcel of the marriage (as it would be in the west as well). You think the difference is there are no deadbeat dad's in the west? No, the difference is, more often than not, here the father doesn't have any money anyway. And the police and courts are not interested in helping a now single mother get what is her child's due. So, gauge your love for this woman, show that you really are a 'goodguy' and give this child the love he or she deserves. My father remarried when I was 3 and my step-mother raised me as her daughter, loved me and nurtured me and I have more love and respect for her than I ever would for my birth mother. As far as I am concerned there is a major difference to the person who gives birth to you and the person who is your parent. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest IT Manager Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 I hate it when I say something sotto voce and it is not only ignored, it is missed. Sad indeed. Possom, dear, the point I was making was rather than bleat about how useless TGF hubby is (ex-hubby whatever), why don't you grow some nuts, or a heart, and take care of the child. Hard work I know but goodness, someone has to. Child-=child. No matter who made it/him./her, it/he/she deserves a go. IMHO if you have the money for a PC to write this then can I suggest it takes about 3 hours to add a bedroom, and a bed etc., and take responsibility yourself for the CHILD as opposed to someone else's kid, and give yourself a bit of a shot in the merit bank. What my colleagues and I are trying to say is this, you have PC, you have house, GF etc. Stretch it a bit, and educate the baby. Who knows, one day you might wake up with the child calling you daddy and you finding some self respect. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
possom Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 KEEP COUGHING UP THE CASH !!!!!!!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluecat Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 What my colleagues and I are trying to say is this, you have PC, you have house, GF etc. Stretch it a bit, and educate the baby. Who knows, one day you might wake up with the child calling you daddy and you finding some self respect. IT, and I really, really mean it, welcome back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
davethailand Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 KEEP COUGHING UP THE CASH !!!!!!!!!!!! basically yes, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest IT Manager Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 Blue it makes me so nutty to see someone with everything complaining about a few baht to change a life. Goodguy, don't listen to Possom. He has no idea at all, about anything. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluecat Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 KEEP COUGHING UP THE CASH !!!!!!!!!!!! Please, Possum. If your relationship is based ONLY on money, I do not think you deserve more comments from my side. I'll let the others comment on your case, if they feel like doing it, anyway,... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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