Strange Thai weddings

[davidst01]

It is my opinion that thai weddings are a bit strange the way that the host will invite every tom, dick and harry that they know- even if they havent seen the person for many years. I attended a wedding recently and was surprised to see an old farang that I hadnt seen for a long time. I said to him ' I didnt realise that you knew <<the host>>'. He said 'I havent seen him for over 4 yrs and only met him a few times'.

It was a huge wedding and after the main meal over half the guests just got up and left without saying goodbye to the host. Even though there were speeches going on.

Throughout the dinner part of the ceremony no-one seemed to be listening to the speeches. Everyone just talks loudly.

During the speeches the M.C and the bride were taking the piss out of the overweight farang. She said 'when I met him he was so fat' etc

Its all so different from back home. Don't get me started on sinsot... I was lucky enough to have the 500k given back to me as we had a baby due. Ultimate respect to my wifes parents for this as I didnt want to feel like I was buying my wife. My wife is different bc she is high class and Im a lucky guy.

Whats the go with inviting random people that you havent seen for a long time. Is it only for the envelope money? Is it a case of the bigger the wedding the better for the reputation?

Edited March 5, 2016 by davidst01

[CharlieH]

Show of power, by who and how many are there, face, and the envelopes.

Never knew half the people at my daughters wedding. The other aspect is you give one invitation, and they bring their entire family with them for a free meal and drink etc.

We had 150 more than were actually invited.

Envelopes cleared the cost easily.

[cyberfarang]

Show of power, by who and how many are there, face, and the envelopes.

Never knew half the people at my daughters wedding. The other aspect is you give one invitation, and they bring their entire family with them for a free meal and drink etc.

We had 150 more than were actually invited.

Envelopes cleared the cost easily.

It`s exactly the same at Thai funerals. My guess is that half the people that turn up don`t even know the deceased. People there grabbing as much free drink and food as possible and then vanish as quickly as they arrived never to be seen again .I recall at a neighbour`s funeral a young man turned up wearing a filthy white tee shirt with a smiley face and HAPPY printed on it. I don`t think it`s a show of power, more like who can win in the popularity contest.

[Satcommlee]

I was lucky enough to have the 500k given back to me as we had a baby due. Ultimate respect to my wifes parents for this as I didnt want to feel like I was buying my wife. My wife is different bc she is high class and Im a lucky guy.

I think you will find that class has nothing to do with this, my wife's family were kind enough to return the two pigs and a chicken to me also..

[Schillaci]

Thai weddings are indeed a strange beast. Everyone rolls in and has a photo with the bride and groom which ultimately takes up half the ceremony. As you say everyone talks over the top of speeches. Come and go when you please.

[steve187]

i never gave a sinsod, what class does that make my wife.

[seancbk]

I'm a Brit, but I wasn't born there and have never lived there, instead I grew up in Hong Kong.

To me it makes perfect sense to invite as many people as possible to your wedding, for a number of reasons.

You want to show how magnificent a celebration you can have, and it's not about the money, it's about showing how many people respect you enough to come. It was the same as my birthday parties in Hong Kong, I would tell everyone I was having a party and I could easily expect to have 300+ people turn up. Bars used to love me!!

Weddings are expensive to plan and execute, but if you plan things right you should break even or even make a profit. At weddings in Asia people give cash gifts, not stupid stuff like toasters and bed linens. Cash is king in Asia. So you plan out who to invite and which table they will be on, the more VIP the table the more face you are giving them and the more cash they should feel obliged to give. You put your poor friends and lower rank staff from your company on the tables at the back, they will be grateful for the invite but won't feel like they need to give as much.

Many Asians put off marriage until they can afford to throw a lavish party. I am the same, I'm not getting married until I can afford to have a big flash wedding in one of the 5 star hotels and have it featured in the society pages.

[pgrahmm]

We had ours in the family home & at our request it was held to just family members - about 80 people.....

Ours started early and like the other comments was more or less fluid or free flowing - but the loudspeakers wouldn't let anyone escape the festivities.....The area where the house is is walled so outsiders would have to enter through a gate....It was done by early afternoon.....

The sin sot was given - used for show - then returned to us going straight into a bank account....I didn't know if it was to be returned or not.....

[berybert]

I'm a Brit, but I wasn't born there and have never lived there, instead I grew up in Hong Kong.

To me it makes perfect sense to invite as many people as possible to your wedding, for a number of reasons.

You want to show how magnificent a celebration you can have, and it's not about the money, it's about showing how many people respect you enough to come. It was the same as my birthday parties in Hong Kong, I would tell everyone I was having a party and I could easily expect to have 300+ people turn up. Bars used to love me!!

Weddings are expensive to plan and execute, but if you plan things right you should break even or even make a profit. At weddings in Asia people give cash gifts, not stupid stuff like toasters and bed linens. Cash is king in Asia. So you plan out who to invite and which table they will be on, the more VIP the table the more face you are giving them and the more cash they should feel obliged to give. You put your poor friends and lower rank staff from your company on the tables at the back, they will be grateful for the invite but won't feel like they need to give as much.

Many Asians put off marriage until they can afford to throw a lavish party. I am the same, I'm not getting married until I can afford to have a big flash wedding in one of the 5 star hotels and have it featured in the society pages.

Its always good to read about people who don't let material things get in the way of their lives.

If I were you I'd book a double header at the hotel you get married at. Then you can use the same one for the divorce.

[GuestHouse]

The strangest Thai wedding I ever went to was one at which the 'happy couple' had hired another couple to play the part of the bride's parents.

Her real parents unhappy with her choice of husband had refused to turn up.

[Patsycat]

The strangest Thai wedding I ever went to was one at which the 'happy couple' had hired another couple to play the part of the bride's parents.

Her real parents unhappy with her choice of husband had refused to turn up.

After i got married, my parents probably wished they had had that option!!

[theguyfromanotherforum]

i never gave a sinsod, what class does that make my wife.

low class

My wife put 1million of her own money for sinsod because she didn't want me to lose money on exchange rate.

Parents should return the money and it has nothing to do with luck or because you are expecting a baby. As my friend told me these weddings are a business and reason why so many people are invited. Mine had 700.

[GuestHouse]

The strangest Thai wedding I ever went to was one at which the 'happy couple' had hired another couple to play the part of the bride's parents.

Her real parents unhappy with her choice of husband had refused to turn up.

What was even stranger was when the hired 'MiL' started demanding her rights to the 'Sin Sod'.

[seancbk]

I'm a Brit, but I wasn't born there and have never lived there, instead I grew up in Hong Kong.

To me it makes perfect sense to invite as many people as possible to your wedding, for a number of reasons.

You want to show how magnificent a celebration you can have, and it's not about the money, it's about showing how many people respect you enough to come. It was the same as my birthday parties in Hong Kong, I would tell everyone I was having a party and I could easily expect to have 300+ people turn up. Bars used to love me!!

Weddings are expensive to plan and execute, but if you plan things right you should break even or even make a profit. At weddings in Asia people give cash gifts, not stupid stuff like toasters and bed linens. Cash is king in Asia. So you plan out who to invite and which table they will be on, the more VIP the table the more face you are giving them and the more cash they should feel obliged to give. You put your poor friends and lower rank staff from your company on the tables at the back, they will be grateful for the invite but won't feel like they need to give as much.

Many Asians put off marriage until they can afford to throw a lavish party. I am the same, I'm not getting married until I can afford to have a big flash wedding in one of the 5 star hotels and have it featured in the society pages.

Its always good to read about people who don't let material things get in the way of their lives.

If I were you I'd book a double header at the hotel you get married at. Then you can use the same one for the divorce.

There you go, putting your values onto other people.

My point was that in Asia, money, success and popularity are considered important indicators of success.

And as far as planning for my divorce, I intend to follow the example of my Father and stay married and faithful to the same woman until I die.

[Anastasios]

i never gave a sinsod, what class does that make my wife.

low class

My wife put 1million of her own money for sinsod because she didn't want me to lose money on exchange rate.

Parents should return the money and it has nothing to do with luck or because you are expecting a baby. As my friend told me these weddings are a business and reason why so many people are invited. Mine had 700.

No, the norm is that if they ask for a sin sot then they are of lower class. Steve187s wifes family was higher up in class or they were just very sensible people.

Why would parents accept a sin sot and then return it to show how kind they are? Why not say no to a sin sot from start?

[PomRakBKK]

I didn't pay a sinsod or got asked for one either. We didn't have a marriage party yet as we almost got no one to invite. A handful of friends of mine, some of hers, parents from both sides. That makes up give or take 20 people. Why invite anyone who doesn't really care about you and or you care about them? It's asian culture, I get that - but still. Luckily my wife has the same attitude towards the marriage party.

We rather save us the whole theatre and have a week in the Maldives or something along those lines. No point in inviting everyone from your driver to your food delivery guy just to 'show off'.

[Thian]

I even had to go to the funeral of my wife's boss' mother! The family (that i had never seen before) even came to thank me personally for my time. It looks good to have farang showing up i guess. All for the show.

When we left we all got a baggy with drinks/food to eat on the way home, also during the ceremony's we got drinks and snacks. It reminded me of birthdayparty's when i was a kid.

I've also been to strange weddings where i couldn't even sit while eating, only family had chairs. It was very crowded and i had to stand in a corner with my food, no free hand for my glass though

Also i've been to weddings where they had real pro camerateams with many huge videocams and assistants and the lot, i counted 10 people only for the camerawork. Add to that all the familymembers who also think they are photographers because they like to show their high-end camera.

But i don't go to chinese 10-course weddings anymore, don't like the food like sharkfinsoup or duckskin or steamed fish.Cocktailparty's are much more fun with huge buffets.

I always chuckle about the older chinese lady's who spent a fortune on their hairdo and make-up.

One wedding i went out to smoke, went back in and took some food from the buffet to find out i walked into the wrong weddingroom in the hotel. There were 3 weddings going on that time.

[jerojero]

The bigger the wedding and more guests, the bigger gain of face for the host.