Age Gaps In Relationships

[GracelessFawn]

I'm curious to know how many people still believe in love, especially when we're talking about 15, 20, 25 or 30 years of age gap.

I'm talking about love, the real deal; a relationship where both lovers are completely very much in-love with each other, happy, contented; one that's very nurturing where couples connect mentally, shares a lot of jokes, phone calls, lots of intimacy, conversations, etc. I'm talking about a real relationship, but one plagued with an age gap. Do you think a relationship like this is for keeps? Do you think a relationship like this still exists?

(I am not talking about the different kind of love which exploits a partner in one way or another, love with benefits, broken wings, etc. I do not condemn people who believe or practic this kind of relationship. This thread is not written to condemn.......)

I'm curious to know how many people in ThaiVisa still believe in love and how far these beliefs go.

[totlanh]

Well Graceless i am 36 and my gorgeous wife is 22 so i think we are bordering on your age criteria.To be honest age has NOTHING to do with a relationship as far as im concerned and i think my happy marriage would go a long way into supporting my argument.

[alexth]

A relationship where both lovers are completely very much in-love with each other, happy, contented; one that's very nurturing where couples connect mentally, shares a lot of jokes, phone calls, lots of intimacy, conversations, etc. I'm talking about a real relationship...

I belive that if these things exist in a relationship (and I mean REALLY exist and don't lie to yourself that exist). then this relationship is a perfect one. Unfortunately people get sometimes bored, or profession steps in as some point, like in all relationships, there are difficult times that need to be passed through on way or another. In a nutshell, if those things really exist in a relation ship, then age is no problem, at least that's what I think.

Goos luck at whatever you're planning to do, GracelessFawn

[Little Black Duck]

GF..How do you know when you're in Love?

Is it when she taps you on the shoulder and says "Your In Love"..

All Joking aside,,

This is a serious question and I think that perhaps your definition of Love will be vastly different from person to person..

There is a big age gap between my lady and I, she is not a BG, and does not ask for monetary gain from me

We have a respectful, jovial(gotta be to mix with me), happy caring relationship and yes I love her and she loves me..

We have the two prime ingredients, Respect and Trust, She works, I work and I am guilty of not paying enough attention to her at times but its OK..

[Robski]

Mmmmmm.., Love eh? I'm willing to give it a try. Do you know where I can get some?

[bkkmadness]

I think you have a low estimation of 'love' if you are even questioning the fact that a paltry thing like age difference could stop it.

[Donz]

I believe its rare when the age difference is huge, more to do with other things.

But im sure many here will disagree, let the flamming begin

[GracelessFawn]

Well Graceless i am 36 and my gorgeous wife is 22 so i think we are bordering on your age criteria.To be honest age has NOTHING to do with a relationship as far as im concerned and i think my happy marriage would go a long way into supporting my argument.

I believe in love. I don't think age is an issue at all! I don't care about the age gap, as long as I make my partner happy and I am happy, if we are both sincere, respect each other, honest, willing to compromise, willing to make it work, then it's perfect. That's all that really matters!

[Minburi]

Its a point of view..If he is 60 and she is 20..Hes an old pervert and she is in it for the money.. WHy could it not be love?

No not talking about not me..I am 43 and my wife who is Thai and is now 30..

One should never assume its one thing because they are more then likely wrong and they do not know the whole story and for the matters its really none of their business. But people love to talk and make assumtions with no valid reason other then they do not know so again they assume.

[Robski]

Would you love me more if I had lots of money, than if I had absolutely none? be honest, would it make a difference? would you love me more if I was older or younger, fatter or thinner, etc etc.. It's not just one thing that makes love it's a combination of things, wanting the same things, but respect and trust are key factors.

[Colonel_Mustard]

I believe its rare when the age difference is huge, more to do with other things.

But im sure many here will disagree, let the flamming begin

I would agree with that.

[MiG16]

the way i see it is this...

you CAN be in love with the huge age gap

BUT to ahve a proper relationship certain practicalities will come into play

so in essence you could be very much in love with someone 30 year solder, but in reality would things really work out? too many differences in the thinking, attitude, lifestyle, particularly what stage you are at in your life.

mind you..this coming from a hopeless romantic...who truly believes in love and that if both partners cared enough a lot of obstructions can be gotten out of the way. yet fact remains that it will be an extremely difficult situation, particularly when you are talking about cases where both partners are equally educated....a woman in her mid to late twenties...meets a guy in his early 50s..thats not even the extreme 30yr gap you are talking about...but woman would be entering the career point where she starts to get the rope of things at work...moving up towards middle management..while guy is almost at the point of retiring...already had children from his previous relationship..all grown up...and hes happy to see it that way....her...wanting kids or career.

so just one way to look at it

cheers especially to those that have managed it...infact I salute everyone who maintain a healthy monogamous relationship with mutual respect

[Donz]

within 30 years aint too bad, when your talking 40 years plus then I believe 90% its not really love.

[VanZam]

How many young Thai women do you see with old broke farang guys?

There's your answer.

Does love exist in relationships with large age gaps? Yes of course, but certainly not to the degree of which some people may be hoping for.

[Donz]

I predict this thread is going to get nasty soon

[sbk]

Just curious GF, are you talking about a relationship where the man is older or the woman, or both?

Also, do you think it matters if both partners come from the same culture or one is Thai (or other Asian) and one is not?

Personally, I think it depends on the couple. I think it is more difficult if there is a great age gap but not necessarily impossible. And has been said, if two people really love each other and are committed to the success of their relationship they will work through their difficulties rather than throw in the towel at the first sign of trouble.

[grapetable]

I dont think its rare at all. Several posts here already suggest its not rare, particularly in Thailand.

[VanZam]

I dont think its rare at all. Several posts here already suggest its not rare, particularly in Thailand.

Yes, thats the worry, and the question... Is it real love? As I said... How many young Thai women do you see with old broke farang guys?

[Robski]

I predict this thread is going to get nasty soon

Best you stay out of it Donz or that'll be another point closer to the sack.

Have you thought about joining in on threads about fishing, or maybe something soothing like flower arranging or poetry?

[grapetable]

Whats the worry VanZam?

People love for their own reasons; if it works what does it matter? Romantic love doesn't last for most, then respect and friendship form the basis of a good relationship.

[Donz]

I dont think its rare at all. Several posts here already suggest its not rare, particularly in Thailand.

Is that love?

Im sure many I see in Thailand are just together for there needs, the older guy wants to bed the younger girl and the girl wants to not worry so much about being broke and having abit of cash.

IMO they may love each other after awhile but I dont believe it is that at the start.

[jamman]

GF..How do you know when you're in Love?

Is it when she taps you on the shoulder and says "Your In Love"..

All Joking aside,,

This is a serious question and I think that perhaps your definition of Love will be vastly different from person to person..

There is a big age gap between my lady and I, she is not a BG, and does not ask for monetary gain from me

We have a respectful, jovial(gotta be to mix with me), happy caring relationship and yes I love her and she loves me..

We have the two prime ingredients, Respect and Trust, She works, I work and I am guilty of not paying enough attention to her at times but its OK..

Does she lust?

Love without lust is buddyship. Buddyship is good.

Most men below 50, if in Asia, could make themself into an object of lust. Attention to details.

[VanZam]

Whats the worry VanZam?

People love for their own reasons; if it works what does it matter? Romantic love doesn't last for most, then respect and friendship form the basis of a good relationship.

Could the OP please define "love"?

I respect your views, and you are indeed correct, I however, do not define love as having "ATM" tattooed on ones forehead.

You may beg to differ?

[Donz]

I predict this thread is going to get nasty soon

Best you stay out of it Donz or that'll be another point closer to the sack.

Have you thought about joining in on threads about fishing, or maybe something soothing like flower arranging or poetry?

Ive actually already been given a holiday on this subject before because someone thought I was talking about his relationship.

But I will be careful this time (not that I will be any safer)

[girlx]

i asked about this before too in the ladies' forum. since then i have had a "gig" who is 8 years younger than me (he's 22 i'm 30), and the reason he remains just a "gig" rather than a boyfriend is because there really is a big difference in our perspectives at these ages. he is very smart and very honest and he treats me pretty well over all, but he is just not mature or stable in his life at all yet like i am, probably needs to sow his seeds a bit too. if i had met him when he was 5 years older maybe it would have worked out better?

[ourmanflint]

Any relationship in which the woman is less than ten years younger than the man is just plain wrong... that's the way nature designed it so we should respect that!!

Ole!!!

[grapetable]

VanZam you seem to assume that older man + young Thai (asian) = sex and money?

Rather presumptuous perhaps?

People love to fullfill needs and wants..........ergo if they are happy what does it matter?

[grapetable]

ourmanflint...............you dont know much about biology! Go back to school!

[Ijustwannateach]

Yawn... I suppose I should supply the token reminder that members posting here should remain polite, follow forum rules, etc. Not sure what the point is doing so on a thread like this, though....

[ourmanflint]

ourmanflint...............you dont know much about biology! Go back to school!

It's nothing to do with biology brainiac... it's sociology and group dynamics