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Gay.com Liars And Fakes (yes I Mean The Farang)


jdinasia

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I am constantly amazed by the farang that lie about their ages on gay.com. They talk with guys promising dates excitement etc when they get to Thailand and then pooftah ... they get here and the profile age of 42 turns out to be a real age of 58+.

Yes, Thai men are quite tolerant of older men. They will happily go out on a date (for the most part) with OLD men. Every one I know that has met either of the 2 guys in specific that I am referring to has pretty much walked away from the meeting. Not because of the man's age. The reason they cited was that the guy was a liar. Couldn't tell the truth about a simple thing so why should he be trusted with matters of the heart?

Any ideas? or comments?

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My feeling is that most Westerners - Farang are (unfortunately) still holding on to the age-bias that is present in 95% of gay men in the West...

In California especially I find that anyone over 45 is virtually ignored... and it doesn't matter HOW good he looks... he can be a gym-bunny.. and the answer is always "too old, sorry."

So, if they are 50+ and are attracted to younger men.. and it's their first time in LOS.. they're not going to believe that Thai men are so age-tolerant... and so they s-t-r-e-t-c-h the truth about their age. :o

When I met my presnt bf, I was honest... he's 21, and I'm 52. And he's VERY happy with that. :D

ChrisP

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You hit the nail on the head, ChrisP. The farang can't tell the truth about their age after they get over 40, and they don't think it's a big test of character. But the Asians don't care so much about the age, and do think it's a big test of character to lie about it.

I tried to take 12 years off my age when I posted ads in Texas to meet gay Asian young men. Right away I gave up because

a. They didn't care about my real age, because I was obviously a lot older than they were.

b. Once I lied about the 12 years, I couldn't get my life story straight anymore.

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My feeling is that most Westerners - Farang are (unfortunately) still holding on to the age-bias that is present in 95% of gay men in the West...

In California especially I find that anyone over 45 is virtually ignored... and it doesn't matter HOW good he looks... he can be a gym-bunny.. and the answer is always "too old, sorry."

So, if they are 50+ and are attracted to younger men.. and it's their first time in LOS.. they're not going to believe that Thai men are so age-tolerant... and so they s-t-r-e-t-c-h the truth about their age. :D

When I met my presnt bf, I was honest... he's 21, and I'm 52. And he's VERY happy with that. :D

ChrisP

Chris isn't that amazing. It's almost the same age difference between me and my boyfriend. :o

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I susupect jdinasia is under thirty.

Many Thai boys think they are over-the-hill by thrity and after that, I suspect they lie about their age as well.

As posted in another thread, my Thai and I both aged ten years in the first two weeks we were together, and we are still together after three years.

I think jdinasia is being a little harsh in his judgement of why the guy lied about his age. Was the lie truly harmful or was the Thai boy disapointed for some other reason. My guess it was something else.

In my experience, men in the west lie about their age, especially if they are gay, lie about the length of the fish they have caught and the length of their commutes and certainly hedge about their endowment in chat rooms.

I frankly don't believe anyone when they speak about their age. I make my own judgement about how old they are based on my observations and their conversation. If the Thais in question really didn't care about the farang's age, they would have forgiven this harmless untruth.

I have found Thais in general, and the ones I know in specific, to commit crimes of ommision abundantly. In a Thai's mind, not telling someone something is not lieing, when we in the west have an expectation of full disclosure of material issues and failing to disclose we feel is deceitful.

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Considering the amount of Thai lying that goes on via internet meeting rooms (and everywhere else), it's hard to be too surprised or that older farang guys are lying, too. Half the Thai profiles on the major internet gay rooms are obvious hookers. Then again, meeting people live doesn't always result in much greater honesty- I guess no matter what, people should be careful where and how they meet people for dating!

The last guy I met online complained to me, too, about the number of Internet farang liars and scum he met... it was 3 weeks later that he admitted he already had a longterm boyfriend!!! So much for being straightforward and honest!

"Steven"

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The riginal thread sems to be around farang lying about their age.

It's not only age! Many young gay Thai men, those who are possibly interested in an older farang, can tell you a range of horror stories, regarding promises of support, manogamy etc etc from farang. Either themselves or their friends, acquaintences.

But let's remeber there are two sides to this subject area. Thais are not squeaky clean in this same subject area.

But let's be more realistic, false promises / lies are a not nice fact of life in all countries /all cultures / all sexual orienations.

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Not a terribly auspicious start to your posting life qcumber.

As is often the case on these boards, overgeneralisations lead to a lot of verbiage, little fact and a bit of bad feeling.

It would be better, in my opinion, that you contemplate that many of us who either live in Thailand full time, or more than half of the year, all have horror stories of dealing with "a Frenchman" or "a German" or "an Aussie". Far better they don't end up being "all Frenchman" but rather remain as "that Frenchman" in my opinion.

It saves a lot of flak in the forum. At 65, you should know better than to generalise like that. Apart from tormenting truth, in most cases it's juvenile.

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The tendency to lie, exaggerate, tell half-truths, or otherwise not tell all the truth all the time, is universal among human beings. The variances are cultural and topical. Bill Clinton lied about sex, and the French and Latin Americans said "So what - good on him!"

Thais tend to avoid telling (all) the truth when somebody will lose face. The English language has the term, "little white lie."

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Talk about the "pot" calling the kettle "black". In my opinion, the only thing wrong with France is the people.

My experience is based on a number of tourist trips, so do not feel my opinion is well founded. since I encountered few Frenchmen who were not connected with the tourist trade.

My experience has taught me that people are people and it is up to oneself to seek out those who are most agreeable to you and avoid those that aren't.

I always thought that the word "arrogance" was coined to describe the french in general and their government in particular. Perhaps any second rate power, trying to act like a world power, gives that impression.

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I'm afraid your answers bring water to my mill, particularly ProThaiExpat's. It is so typical, almost a caricature. And this is not the first piece of that kind of "literature" I have read for the past 40 years or so. Actually I have the impression I am always coming across them in the media or in fora like this one. Excuse me for being French. :o

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I'm afraid your answers bring water to my mill, particularly ProThaiExpat's. It is so typical, almost a caricature. And this is not the first piece of that kind of "literature" I have read for the past 40 years or so. Actually I have the impression I am always coming across them in the media or in fora like this one. Excuse me for being French. :o

Are you not also guilty of the same generalisations?

Sorry, but my experience has taught me that, basically, Anglo-Saxons are liars and dissemblers. Oh, I forgot, arrogant, too, the British in particular.
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  • 2 weeks later...

Well Jdinasia is in fact 40.

Guess you missed the point of the post. If a guy (in this case claiming to be 47 and is in fact in his early 60's) cannot be honest prior to meeting shouldn't that tell you all you need to know about their intergrity?

As for the "french" topic ... he just needed attention

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Well all french men STINK of bad body odour, particually from under arm. And this is a fact as I had the unpleasuarble experience of having 2 smelly frenchmen in my office today. Had to sprayaround after they left

We do the same with people like you - spray deodorant after you've left - but we are too polite to reproach you with your body odor. We know you can't help it, and you don't like soap. Besides you are dissemblers and liars. :o

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