ToddWeston

Let me start by saying - I'm an idiot. I made a mistake and I'm trying to get my head around a solution whilst thinking about Thai sensitivities and family dynamics (secrets)

Hubby and I came here to plan our future, I forget the reasons now but they all made sense at the time.

We have fantastic nieces and nephews, we were here when each one was born and they are amazing kids who are beautiful inside and out, they've been spoiled but are turning into great adults and I'm proud as hell. There is one who has been, let's say a little akward with my husband - they've had a few words and he just seems to be at that age (19) where the world is against him.

I've been taking him out on errands and he is fine with me, talks about life, girls, living abroad, school, career all normal stuff, the last few times he's been saying things that irritate me though, Those shorts are really gay, look at those gays who's the top, little comments that I've responded with a stern watch your mouth and then a big smile. I've asked him what the problem is between Uncle (hubby) and him and he said he just doesn't like him, he doesn't listen and is just like his parents - all kids hate adults at that age. But with me alone he's been outright abusive about my husband and inlaws and I've told him in no uncertain terms to stand down, he either got the message or just doesn't share his feelings as much, he also has a major hate on with his father and brothers.

Last night we treated the family for a meal out and when we got home he asked me for some pocket money, because he was going out to get "laid" I nearly lost my cookies. I said let's talk and he said "FINALLY I have some bad news and I can trust you and I've been hinting forever we need to talk"

Out we go, thank God I was wise enough to pour a stiff drink. I said what's up ? and he started to cry saying he's sick and got himself into trouble. For a moment I thought shi*t does this kid have cancer, did he knock up a girl, what the hell is he going on about and where is my husband. He finally came around and said "he thinks he's a gay" and has a boyfriend who is much older (23) Honest to God I was blown away but my reaction was terrible I actually said (hate me now) is this a phase ...........are you sure.......stupid comments just flew out and I couldn't stop myself. He said he's known since he was 8 and asked when I knew and I don't think I responded.

I keep blaming myself that I didn't have a clue - and I would have handled it better if I'd known, but what clues (stupid sterotypes) heck I never came out and my husband still insists that I'm the only gay in town - Daffyd. I have no experience at all dealing with this and I realise as a gay man I should have been able to wing it and share the moment and care for him much better than I did.

I've spent the day almost in silence pondering what to do next, the little twit obviously chose me to confide in (honoured) and to keep his secret, I feel awful the way I handled it, really awful, he didn't go out last night and messaged he will be over tonight to help me with something (what that is I have no idea)

I will man up and deal with this and apologise and show the love I neglected to show last night, I will respect his wish and not tell my husband until the plane door closes (I think)

We've been on line most of the day and he's said he feels relief and has thanked me 5 times for listening and he will really try to be nicer to his family.

I know what I did wrong, what say you to make things better ? How did you guys handle a situation like this if ever ? any words if wisdom? are actions more important than words? I'm proud of him it took real guts, it's not about my guilt I need to help this kid and be there for him. I just wish he told someone else first

Perhaps it will be a good read for others to handle things better than Unc Toad.

I recall there was a ban in Canada back in the 80's - it was mostly gay book shoppes that were not allowed to import what they classified as gay material, but mainstream book stores could import such books - The Supreme Court finally weighed in and the matter was taken care of.

I'm almost tempted to buy Winnie the Pooh and see what these nut cases are talking about. BTW Winnie was named after Winnipeg Canada

My experience is in a quiet neighbourhhod street where it's clearly marked 50km the need to go 80 then we enter the highway which is posted at 100km but generally flows at 120km and we're doing 90.

I was a called a liar - there is no such thing as black ice - two winters later why don't they report black ice on every newscast

My favourite is hitting the Queen Vic for a couple of pints and then Bradmans for food, both are on Soi 23. The breakfast at the Queen Vic is one of the better items on the menu, if the staff were nice I'd go more often. Bradmans isn't so much a pub setting but has great food and decent lager, nice staff and the owner is a really nice Aussie chap.

That was great - I wish it had subtitles though

You don't speak standard international English, innit?

JT if your heard my Newfoudland accent I bet you'd catch 30% and need subtitles- think Australian, Irish, west Cornish combined and we mumble, forget the expressions jus the accent most are lost. The more screech we drink the faster we go. Central Canada doesn't even understand us lol

Back to the clip, the Minister in Dallas was one of my favourite bits.

It true it does make you gay - I wasn't gay until I met my Thai boyfriend/husband years ago he started to cook for me, all the food was bite size and it allowed me to just glare into his eyes much longer and not worry about the knife and fork thing - I think he put a spell on me otherwise I'd have 7 kids instead of a cat.

I'm sure there was a hint of humour in your post with regards to the pussy Todd, oops sorry meant cat, don't tell Jing though because I know he hates them...

Whilst I profess to be an animal lover, I'll admit I can't stand this pussy. I was furious when I found out we were bringing him on our trip and in the back of my mind how I could bribe customs to deny him entry. Of course everything went against my wishes and he's already chewed my brand new flip flops.. He's spoiled rotten by the better half and he eats Thai food - now I'm wondering if the cat is gay?

It's all so confusing if our male, tesicle free, Thai food eating pussy were gay what label would we put on it? would we have the first ladyboy pussy in Thailand?

That was great - I wish it had subtitles though

I had a taste for Well Hung Gai at a very early age and never turned back...

Chinese Thai ? I think I met him once ..Mister Chui Mi Wang ?

I've always found anaesthetists to be such a bore - I fall asleep listening to them.

I don't smoke except when I'm going to the airport or in transit - how weird is that or if I am over served in a pub - a pack could last me two months. I don't hate smokers in fact I find them more fun.

I was nabbed a few weeks ago and in all honesty whilst I was mad for a second, I went back and thanked them the next time I saw the officer. I wouldn't do it in my home country why I did it here is beyond me, 'll blame the heat.

Are we targeted hell yes, but at the end of the day I was wrong and I'll never do it again.

2000 baht is a few packs in my home country and I learnt my lesson.

Wish I could help, but no plans on the journey to Hanoi.

Congrats on your nuptials.

It true it does make you gay - I wasn't gay until I met my Thai boyfriend/husband years ago he started to cook for me, all the food was bite size and it allowed me to just glare into his eyes much longer and not worry about the knife and fork thing - I think he put a spell on me otherwise I'd have 7 kids instead of a cat.

Well hmmmm I was invited to be an invigilator at a school that will remain nameless a few years back and I wish these were in place then. I often think about that experience and wonder with the smart phone technology now one almost needs 1:1 student /invigilator ratio these days . There were 4 of us and we were rather busy.

At last the real preoccupations of posters are showing through! Russians.... pah!

Indeed and I even offered to carry all the heavy groceries today for a little work out - that 6 pack is somewhere I just need to find it.

I have frozen cheese before but only used it in Welsh rarebit afterwards-cooking with sauces etc. I've tried the odd piece after its been frozen and it does change the taste and testure and I would say the cheese here is not frozen at all. Just bought some Mainland Epicure for 159 baht, it's aged 36 months and came with a neat little container at tesco and it's fine cheddar for me.

I feel rather stupid now or naive perhaps for asking the question in the first place I should have put two and two together - my sincere apologies.

Goes to show you the information here is solid.

Please feel free to lock the thread as it was never my intent to discuss illegal activity and I'll go sit in the corner for the rest of the day.

The application fee for an annual retirement extension in Thailand is 1900 baht.

There are no other annual fees.

You can also purchase optional reentry permits if you need them at 1000 baht each or purchase a multiple reentry permit if you travel a lot.

Those higher fees you're being told about are for outside visa agencies offering help, sometimes legal, sometimes not, to applicants.

The typical legitimate applicant has NO NEED of any such commercial help.

Cheers.

Thanks JT for the quick response that is exactly what I thought the numbers were for fees. I'd never heard of the need to use an agency so I caught off guard.

Cheers

A visiting neighbour popped over this morning to introduce himself and has confused me. I mentioned I'll be 50 in a bit and thanks to Aeon I'm building my 800k which I'll park. I've read most of the threads here to educate myself and no one discusses the fee, I get the seasoning, the account must have access - almost everything thanks to this thread.

This guy (first time I met him) was going on that I need to pay 28,000 baht per year and that I should use an agency, some agencies charge 30k baht - I don't think he's getting commission or anything like that he seems rather personable. I said I'd rather deal direct as I'm not sure what the agency would do for me except run back and forth filling out forms, he replied ask around for a good agency they will take care of you. He had to run and said he would pop back with some information this week end. I'll learn more the but your insight would be appreciated.

Maybe I've missed the fee part, do I have to pay 28k THB per annum ? and do I pay the same fee directly to immigration? it's only a grand so I'm not terrible worried about it but I want to make sure I know how to proceed when I'm ready to apply.

This has truly been most enlightening, in all honesty I didn't know many of the names at all. Hopefully someday someone will author a book for the new gen to learn about some of these devoted people.

I don't know why I feel no connection to singers - Madonna, Cher, Bete Middler I assume it's for the work they do off stage that garners such a following, anyway it's nice to see some history here with all the names and nationalities.

Thank you amd keep them coming I suspect there are many more.

Lol great fun, I'm sure the house came down with cheers.

I'm always so impressed with kids who have the talent and b@lls to so something like that, I still get embarassed and dread dancing with my sisters and Mum at weddings

I was looking at the Grand Centre Point Terminal 21 the other day for a week end - get into town. Rates on agoda were at the higher end of your budget but it's attached to the BTS and mRT and lots of reataurants in the area and Terminal 21 is a fun mall to spend some time in.

http://www.grandecentrepointterminal21.com/

I've put family up in the Citadines on Soi 11 and they enjoyed the hustle and bustle of Soi 11, mind you it's 5 minutes walk to Nana BTS

Funny post, Todd, but I doubt very many gay Russians can realistically come to Thailand to live permanently. Some, yes.

So IF one wanted to lure Thai gays to the embassy of Russia to protest, just hypothetically, some kind of dancing show with hot and hunky Russian men might do the trick?

Seems like that would do the trick, so help me god JT if he buys me weights tomorrow your ass is grass.

Everyone turn to their Thai civil partner, husband, partner, boyfriend and ask them what they think. I did.....

Start of conversation

Russia has enacted some serious anti gay laws and some are calling for protests and wondering if Thais would get out and protest because we farangs can't - do you think Thais would protest against Russia and their anti gay policy in Thailand?

Thai ------------- TV member

Russia what ?........ they don't have freedom like us

In Russia? .......yes dear

Why you care ? because I'm on TV and some think it's important

Okay whatever.....I'm reading and learning and want your opinion

Why we care?........ it's gays in Russia who can't live like us

Why waste our time we have our stuffs, Thailand is free so let them come here

How many gays in Russia ?....... I suspect 2 million

Gays in Russia .... really that many ? body builder types ? ..... didn't answer that one

and finally - why don't you look more like a Russian?

Bottom line: Thailand doesn't give a hoot or at least the one Thai I cherish doesn't and yes the country is a respected nation with lots of clout in terms of business and it's people are happy living in their fortress.

nb: The questions were conducted with 1 bottle of Marks and Sparks Chardonnay and may not represent all Thais.

Pxigirl, you've obviously mixed with some strange people! There are some odd ones in the Bible belt.

First, you might differentiate between Christians (even the very odd ones) and Muslims.

Most of the rest of your post is quite as intolerant as the people you mention Really, need I say more?

Well, a bit more. Gays generally want tolerance and acceptance on an equal basis with everybody else. If you can't tolerate others, why should they tolerate you?

Of course religions should be allowed a voice on gay issues, so should anyone else who wants to say their piece. You can, and obviously will, disregard them, but that's quite another matter.

If you can't tolerate others, why should they tolerate you?

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