hellohello123

Maybe when I hit 60 I'll look at things differently

But if you flash your cash and expect the girl to behave any different whether In thailahd or back home then you have rocks in your head

I'm not going to read all the responses

Bu

But man you guys are harsh!!!!

Sure he might be on the conservative but if you need to be an atm for your gf then it's not respectful from both sides

If that's the sort of relationship you want, then so be it, but other than the teach the gf financial responsible bit, I think he is doing great right thing

If you have picked up a bar girl then stiff shit, but if she is a genuine girl, there won't be as much focus on money as what people are mentioning here

You have to forgive some of those replies, for the only way they would ever have a successful relationship with a thai girl [or perhaps any girl] would be to be the financial provider for 100% of everything.

God help them if the money well ever runs dry.

That was one of the OP major mistakes, of coming here with that story. Flame bait!!!!!

Excuse my generalisations but I'm not 60+ fat, bald and ugly

But If you have to pay pay pay every step of the way, you are essentially paying a hooker or the girl is seeing youfor more then your personality

If it works for you then, good luck to you,

If it doesn't, then you have to look for a good girl,

Ask yourself would you be paying for all of this stuff back home

If the girl is genuine, she will respect you for who you are and not how much you can withdraw from the atm

Just my 2c

I'm not going to read all the responses

Bu

But man you guys are harsh!!!!

Sure he might be on the conservative but if you need to be an atm for your gf then it's not respectful from both sides

If that's the sort of relationship you want, then so be it, but other than the teach the gf financial responsible bit, I think he is doing great right thing

If you have picked up a bar girl then stiff shit, but if she is a genuine girl, there won't be as much focus on money as what people are mentioning here

I know a guy who would love to trade everything to be single again. He always say if he could turn back the clock, he would never ever get married and have kids. He still regrets today....

Your father?

Ouchy! That's gotta hurt

Grand Swiss on Soi 11 have just opened and have opening specials, ive booked

and a friend is there right now and says its very nice, inlcuding the roof top bar

$65 per night, bargain for a 4-5 star

I find it amusing how you go to any major shopping centre and there is a metal detector at the entrance, while people stream through it, the machine is going bananas beeping at just about everyone and the security just sit there day dreaming

How old are you, how old is she, and where did you pick her up from?

Does it matter ?

He is either beyond help, or talking out his @rse.

That's a bit harsh

I agree he started the relationship on bad pretences by paying for her dentists bills etc

Would he be ridiculed as much if he was talking about a girl back home?

Hmm, the OP is trying to teach his girlfriend of three weeks, financial responsibility and budgeting, some of us having been trying to teach our wives such things for fifteen years or more and still we're not there yet!

The other striking point about what was written is the OP's complete lack of understanding of Thai culture, you're going to her mums house for the first time, sure you need to buy her a gift.

The part about the car and driver for 3.5k, silly girlfriend for doing that but doubtless she wanted to show an association to farang wealth, the issue there is 90% about "face", the 10% is likely that she wanted you to have a relaxed trip in comfort.

Good luck, you've got a way to go yet,

1st sentence - Haha true

2nd sentence - I agree, always get a gift to meet the potential inlaws, regardless of culture. In my culture, a bottle of wine, a hamper of food, a bunch of flowers, is always a good thing, however, maybe in thailand they expect a new buffalo

3rd sentence - I still dont truly understand it completely, if face was so important wouldnt she made sure she got the money from him in front of her friends and family, if she really wanted to gain face, all she would need to do is tell her family that rich farang gave her 3500 for petrol, even if he didnt

4th sentence - agree, I dont think he is tight ass, just careful, and probably smart, but a lot to learn

How old are you, how old is she, and where did you pick her up from?

There is nothing noble about having or not having kids, its a personal choice. Key word "personal"

I dont judge on anyones personal decisions, but those that do, dont look down on others who decide not to, there is nothing more embarassing then having to listen to someone who looks down on those that dont have kids. Its just as bad as listening to someone who has maxed out their credit card and is in financial disaster from overspending on holidays, booze, car, latest gadgets, dining out complain about how tough their life is and how they deserve a better life and how unfair god is, and they wish someone would pay their card off

A few years ago I found a bird in the middle of a suburban road, couldnt tell if it was sick or young or injured

took it back home, fed it overnight, and then drove it 45 mins to the local RSPCA in the morning,

to which they told me, it was a pest and by law/regulation, they had to put it down.

well that made me feel a bit useless and silly

I still have faith in the human race when I hear stories like this, well done for trying

Ive heard of stories of sex workers back home whom engage with a client and the client doesnt want any sex.

sometimes they just want to talk, sometimes they just want to hug, sometimes they get in the same room and ignore eachtoher

was wondering if anyone actually ST/LT a girl and doesnt get down on the deed? or is it a phenomenon never seen in Thailand?

in my will, i have left over 50% of my assets (not that its that much at this point in time anyway) to various charties, mostly for animals

id rather help innocent beings then someone who may see me as a walking atm, thailand or not

Why do you want to help anyone or anything when you are dead, when you can accomplish much more alive?

"Let us not meet death with saved energy" (Swedish poet)

fair enough question,

firstly I Need to live, and I may need those assets down the line, I dont want to donate what I have now and then get sick or have an accident and have nothing to support myself

also, while im alive, I can earn/leverage/increase these assets and do more

in my will, i have left over 50% of my assets (not that its that much at this point in time anyway) to various charties, mostly for animals

id rather help innocent beings then someone who may see me as a walking atm, thailand or not

um, I just had a look

Radisson Suites vs In Residence

http://www.agoda.com/en-au/radisson-suites-bangkok-sukhumvit/hotel/bangkok-th.html?asq=bs17wTmKLORqTfZUfjFABg%2fD2arSnmfWa61lPtLfgiQLf1UJZkFqX2lUMy2mcGtEzDr9tCpJ9LMlRJJ5bArzuBJ3OSLeRze4RFS44dHTvuBJ5pAF73f621%2bOUd7%2f5lltmXSgJEVU%2bRvzs2p%2fJvfS0QxcjovhBL%2flynDeHUjAyPYdyubAelZEYs7QmP9GGTFBlx4R5JS655HGxpr26KFNb0cLbUYA3lOjzbo7AoOfufU%3d&tyra=1|30

http://www.agoda.com/en-au/in-residence-bangkok-sukhumvit/reviews/bangkok-th.html?asq=bs17wTmKLORqTfZUfjFABg%2fD2arSnmfWa61lPtLfgiQLf1UJZkFqX2lUMy2mcGtEzDr9tCpJ9LMlRJJ5bArzuBJ3OSLeRze4RFS44dHTvuBJ5pAF73f621%2bOUd7%2f5lltmXSgJEVU%2bRvzs2p%2fJvfS0QxcjovhBL%2flynDeHUjAyPYdyubAelZEYs7QmP9GGTFBxFeLb8amRbvBq%2fAxRQB17RbxjFyhX8w9sm4ysVmZcBAzzfxSbccsse0lUkO0%2fo6uKw9E43uPow0oUAh8Y9aCwZwRwxc6mmrXcYNM8lsQlbU%3d#HotelReviewHeader

almost identical address, almost identical room photos,

whats the difference?!?!!? but in residence significantly cheaper!

I stayed in the one bedroom radisson suite about two years ago from a free upgrqde, and have been going there everyyear and asking for an upgrade, but they havent given me one since then

My girl is well educated and put herself through school to a masters degree level.

What has the education of your GF to do with the story?? Why is it that nearly every post is pre fixed with this on here? Short hand for "my gf isnt an ex hooker so dont judge but listen to this story"??

The first bloke to prefix a post with "I`m a retired sex pat shacked up with a ex hooker in Issan" gets a pint from me

I have often wondered the same thing. If you read Thai Visa posts, you would think every single

member is married to a Thai/Chinese college graduate from a hiso family . And having been here a very long time, I know that is far from the truth... In fact if I were a betting man, I would guess

that of the posters here on TV, about 60 % are married to former bar girls....

Regarding the dog story, the only danger might be from the owner falling down laughing when

he hears a demand for money....

and dont forget even though he is 20 years older then his bargirl wife, he looks 10 years younger and isnt one of those old, fat, smelly men, and how all his friends are jealous of him

even though he makes minimum wage or is on a minimal pension

My girl is well educated and put herself through school to a masters degree level.

What has the education of your GF to do with the story?? Why is it that nearly every post is pre fixed with this on here? Short hand for "my gf isnt an ex hooker so dont judge but listen to this story"??

The first bloke to prefix a post with "I`m a retired sex pat shacked up with a ex hooker in Issan" gets a pint from me

well said! it seems to be common amongst many many members here,

I would assume mostly keyboard warriors

Isn't it time we had a Doormat Forum?

I think it would be easier to rename the general forum to doormat forum

I know there is a list of hotels in bkk, but unless there is another thread on this,

How about we list some awesome value hotels in sukhumvit

Here are mine

Le fenix soi 11 - about $60 per night with breakfast, terrific value

Dream bangkok soi 15- about 70 Inc breakfast, nice rooms

Radisson suites soi 13 - about 80 per night without breakfast, beautiful big rooms, but location a bit isolated, I believe it's the cheapest 5 Star

Sorry to say but another farang who thinks that they are saving a poor helpless girl

I've never met so many people who are actually proud of being a doormat

Subscribed!

 

I'm perhaps whats called a binge drinker.. which I read, is the worst regarding health concerns...
 
I haven't had a drink for a while (because I'm away working).
 
When I'm in Bangkok I'll go out 2 or 3 nights a week, I'll drink anywhere between half and three quarters of a bottle of Chivas - Less if the night is slow, more if we are having an excellent time. 
The bottle will go on the table, Friends and I will talk, tease, enjoy and get drunk..... this is the same when I'm out with Just Thai friends or Western Friends or as often is the case, a mixture.
I start off nice and strong to bring on the sparkle early, when I feel I'm getting too drunk I'll cut back my mix (usually at about midnight).
 
I've never had any issues and enjoy drinking this way. All my friends are generally good drunks, no one gets into trouble, no one has a loose mouth, all just good fun.
 
Staying at home and not drinking is a not a problem, some nights I don't want a drink, some nights I'll enjoy a glass of wine with dinner, some nights I'll enjoy a nice Whisky in front of the TV. 
 
I thoroughly enjoy drinking, I enjoy being around people who can handle their juice and remain fun and polite... Alcahol is a great social lubricant around the right people. 
The issue is that some people aren't the right people and don't know how to behave when drunk... I've long suspected alcohol brings out the true person, some people become wonderful, if not a little incoherent !... others become idiots... I find alcohol useful tool in judging character... 
 

You wrote, " I've long suspected alcohol brings out the true person,"  No.  All the professional information is 100% the opposite.  You might want to google alcoholic personality change.  Or drunk hit and run drivers.  Or drunk wife abusers.  
 
We all know that when you start to drink, inhibitions go," says internist Nicholas A. Pace, a member of the medical-scientific committee of the National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence. And as the level of alcohol increases, the effects increase. "Three or more drinks in an hour can lead you to do things you would never do otherwise and may not remember afterward.
http://www.harpersbazaar.com/beauty/health-wellness-articles/does-alcohol-change-your-personality
 
We believe alcohol disrupts cognitive functioning, making us unable to look at different problem-solving
options," Parrot suggests.
http://www.webmd.com/men/features/whats-your-drinking-personality
 
Other symptoms of alcoholism specific to the brain include personality changes, - See more at: http://www.dana.org/Publications/GuideDetails.aspx?id=49988#sthash.qQS9dwTE.dpuf
 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_7d41z4mgWU 
 

 
I can't really argue with all that research...  Well I can, just a little anyway... 
 
From my perspective - I know a good number of people who when drunk, continue to enjoy themselves, don't get into silly arguments or flights, don't have problems with their wives or girl friends etc... I also know a couple of people who become idiots when they are drunk.
 
The research may show that these people are suffering the effects of 'personality change' due to alcohol...  I suspect otherwise. These people are already idiots, its just that when they are sober they have better self control. Its not their personality which changes, its their ability to control themselves, their true personality surfaces. 
 
A good person, who is also a good drunk doesn't do bad things - there may be errors in judgement we are all familiar with, but there is no personality switch.
 
A bad drunk may blame alcohol, but they have made the decision to drink knowing they may become violent, or drink drive, or make exceptionally poor, violent, dangerous decisions... Their personalities were not changed when they made this decision to drink. It could be argued that this research is simply giving bad drunks an excuse for their behaviour... (just food for thought).....

I dunno about the last paragraph, as per my post, I don't get violent or aggressive as that's not my nature, however I do things that I would normally never do,

I've driven home drunk but I never speed when I'm sober

I swear a lot when I'm drunk in a non aggressive way, a lot of fuks and shits when talking with friends, but normally I don't swear thay much

 

I'm perhaps whats called a binge drinker.. which I read, is the worst regarding health concerns...
 
I haven't had a drink for a while (because I'm away working).
 
When I'm in Bangkok I'll go out 2 or 3 nights a week, I'll drink anywhere between half and three quarters of a bottle of Chivas - Less if the night is slow, more if we are having an excellent time. 
The bottle will go on the table, Friends and I will talk, tease, enjoy and get drunk..... this is the same when I'm out with Just Thai friends or Western Friends or as often is the case, a mixture.
I start off nice and strong to bring on the sparkle early, when I feel I'm getting too drunk I'll cut back my mix (usually at about midnight).
 
I've never had any issues and enjoy drinking this way. All my friends are generally good drunks, no one gets into trouble, no one has a loose mouth, all just good fun.
 
Staying at home and not drinking is a not a problem, some nights I don't want a drink, some nights I'll enjoy a glass of wine with dinner, some nights I'll enjoy a nice Whisky in front of the TV. 
 
I thoroughly enjoy drinking, I enjoy being around people who can handle their juice and remain fun and polite... Alcahol is a great social lubricant around the right people. 
The issue is that some people aren't the right people and don't know how to behave when drunk... I've long suspected alcohol brings out the true person, some people become wonderful, if not a little incoherent !... others become idiots... I find alcohol useful tool in judging character... 
 

You wrote, " I've long suspected alcohol brings out the true person,"  No.  All the professional information is 100% the opposite.  You might want to google alcoholic personality change.  Or drunk hit and run drivers.  Or drunk wife abusers.  
 
We all know that when you start to drink, inhibitions go," says internist Nicholas A. Pace, a member of the medical-scientific committee of the National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence. And as the level of alcohol increases, the effects increase. "Three or more drinks in an hour can lead you to do things you would never do otherwise and may not remember afterward.
http://www.harpersbazaar.com/beauty/health-wellness-articles/does-alcohol-change-your-personality
 
We believe alcohol disrupts cognitive functioning, making us unable to look at different problem-solving
options," Parrot suggests.
http://www.webmd.com/men/features/whats-your-drinking-personality
 
Other symptoms of alcoholism specific to the brain include personality changes, - See more at: http://www.dana.org/Publications/GuideDetails.aspx?id=49988#sthash.qQS9dwTE.dpuf
 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_7d41z4mgWU 
 

 
I can't really argue with all that research...  Well I can, just a little anyway... 
 
From my perspective - I know a good number of people who when drunk, continue to enjoy themselves, don't get into silly arguments or flights, don't have problems with their wives or girl friends etc... I also know a couple of people who become idiots when they are drunk.
 
The research may show that these people are suffering the effects of 'personality change' due to alcohol...  I suspect otherwise. These people are already idiots, its just that when they are sober they have better self control. Its not their personality which changes, its their ability to control themselves, their true personality surfaces. 
 
A good person, who is also a good drunk doesn't do bad things - there may be errors in judgement we are all familiar with, but there is no personality switch.
 
A bad drunk may blame alcohol, but they have made the decision to drink knowing they may become violent, or drink drive, or make exceptionally poor, violent, dangerous decisions... Their personalities were not changed when they made this decision to drink. It could be argued that this research is simply giving bad drunks an excuse for their behaviour... (just food for thought).....

I don't know If this disproves or supports your post but I'm a binge drinker

And when I get drunk I get extremely happy, never violent, never aggressive, never bad mood, never argumentative. It's like all my senses are numbed and the happy senses get magnified

I become very happy, chatty, more easy going however I start talking garbage

As in I might say I have the hots for a girl that I have no interest,
I might say I want to go to a country that I've never thought about
Or I say I'm going to get a new hobby like scrabble which I have no interest in

I think I'm lucky as I'm a generally a very happy and positive optimistic person when in everyday life

There are plenty of children in the world who were brought into the world by people who really should never have been parents. Don't join this club just because the rest of the herd tells you to.

That's the second time this herd word has popped up in this thread.

It's a laughable concept, especially in the west, and especially in the last fifty years or so.

In fact, in this regard Thailand now shares the same attitude as the West but Thailand has maybe taken it too far as the birth rate has plummeted.

Social pressure now is to not have children, or to have a small family.

There is nothing "herdish" in having children.

In fact, in the West its almost at the point of becoming unique.

There's nothing noble in not having children.

That doesn't make you unique - you are the new norm. And here's the bitter truth about it - outside your close family - no one cares.

I've seen the rise of the childless couple - and I couldn't care less about that either.

Just the same way as I couldn't care less when the husband dies and leaves their wife alone.

Then loneliness becomes the new norm.

I bet you know how that feels already. Get used to it - its not going to get any better.

When those close to you die - and you join the vast ranks of the discarded elderly - then you'll really feel it. If you're lucky you'll die suddenly in your sleep, if you're unlucky you'll enter into a long slow decline. And no one will be interested.

No sons will take you out to watch a sports match. No daughters will invite you round for a thanksgiving dinner.

You won't see your grandchildren graduate. You'll just turn to dust and be gone.

And no one will care. No one will care.

Up to you.

So having children is just a selfish thing? So someone will care about you when you are old? So you think you will not be lonely? Children are simply to ensure you enjoy your later years?

Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect Thailand

My opinion, having children is both selfish and selfless. Those people that thibk they are doing the world a huge favour piss Me off

Many people have kids because;

They are bored with life

They want to do the normal thing

They don't want to be left behind

They want someone to look after them when they get older

They are lonely now

They think they will be lonely later

They are all selfish!

I recently bought a fairly expensive fuel inefficient car that probably damages the environment. That's purely selfish, I don't say I'm doing the world a favour

If those saying that having a child is purely selfless why don't you sponsor a child, and give 50% of your salary to an orphanage but you have to remain anonymous and have no contact with the child or orphanage??? That means the kids can't thank you, talk to you, loom after you, keep you company etc etc etc. You would be helping unfortunate kids selflessly, while getting no benefits other then the satisfaction of knowing you are making a difference!

That to me is selfless,

I doubt anyone would be willing to do that!

Btw I'm not against kids, if I met the lady of my dreams, I would consider it, but I'm not doing the world any favours

The vaguely interesting thing is that you actually, truly believe that which you have written to be intelligent discourse,

I don't know anyone that says to themselves -

"I'm going to do the world a favour and have children."

Do you have any idea how stupid and absurd that comment is?

I'll guess there are thousands of parents on Thaivisa - I'm prepared to bet that not one of them said to themselves

"I'm going to do the world a favour and have a child."

Due to my job, I reckon I've met easily twenty thousand parents or more - and never have I heard the words

"I'm going to do the world a favour," used as a justification by any of them for having a child.

Not one.

Oh no, don't tell me you are another one of these people that can't handle accepting people have different opinions to your self

As for your comment , you've never met anyone who has said this, out of your 20,000??? Let me say, read this forum alone, and there is already two comments alone people saying having kids benefits society

Plus

Just because you don't say it word for word, doesn't mean anything. it comes across in obviously your attitude especially some of condescending comments you have towards others,

If pointing this out makes people intelligent, then yes, there are many intelligent people on here