plachon

This goes from funny to hilarious to rib-busting joke a sentence stuff. The Thai Army are "asking Jack Nicklaus to lower his quoted asking price of several million US dollars" so the PM's cousin and his cronies can get some cheap subsidised golf, at new "Super Elite" golf courses, built on army land. He'll jump at that offer I'm sure. Why don't they just give Jack a card and say they've got 401 members and I'm sure he'll just design it for free!

I think they just got a bit confused about the 40,000 people who showed interest in the ScumCard, rather than the EliteUn.

plachon...I hear you and I'm US born and raised...

Take this item elswhere or shut it down...

Here! Here! Tutsi (and I'll make a special exemption in your case, as I ceased worrying about you as soon as I heard you appreciate a well-pulled pint of Harvey's and could distinguish between the Indian and Pakistani Prez's in an ID line up)

are so quick to commit suicide?

Let's see now........................

No Jesus, No Wal-Mart, No television,

No cheerleaders, No baseball,

No football, No basketball, No hockey, No golf,

No tailgate parties, No Hooters,

No Home Depot, No pork BBQ, No hot dogs,

No burgers, No lobster,

No shellfish, or even frozen fish sticks,

No gumbo, No jambalaya, and....No beer.

Rags for clothes and towels for hats.

Constant wailing from the guy next-door

because he's sick and there are no doctors.

Constant wailing from the guy in the tower.

No chocolate chip cookies. No Christmas.

More than one wife. and....No beer.

More than one mother-in-law.

You can't shave.

Your wives can't shave.

You can't shower to wash off the smell of donkey

cooked over burning camel dung.

The women have to wear baggy dresses and veils at all times.

Someone else picks your bride and she smells just like your donkey, but, your donkey has a better disposition.

Then...they tell you that when you die it all gets better!

I mean, really, is there a mystery here?

Why do Americans worry me so much? Perhaps because there's so many as pig-ignorant as this Goatroper perchance? Nah, only 7 % having passports and allowing GWB to lead them are reasons enough.

PS Where's the Bear Pit got to? Reinstate soon before G-P and the Gent get wind of this post!

Pnu,

Glad you didn't take my rant the wrong way! It's just that I come across too many ex-farmers who staked all their land with loan sharks (usually the local Sino-Thai agricultural merchant) and then end up on the scrap heap of society either in the slums of BKK or as tenant farmers on what used to be their land. Clearing up the loan shark business is one of Tox's stated aims (as it was declared as the No. 1 problem by the poor themselves), but as always he seems to be going about it the wrong way (like hounding 6 year old innocents!) and ........The Song Remains the Same.

Sorry to seem like I'm going off topic Mango Head, but to understand farming in Isaan, I think it is also good to understand the nature of the beast for the local farmers too, and not just the rather rosy scene that can be painted by farang hobby farmers who have (comparatively) endless funds to fall back on and subsidise the operations. The reality of Isaan farming for the average Thai punter is very different, obtaining funds for their farm improvements from either debt (legal/low interest, but hard to obtain or semi-legal/high interest loans easy to access from the local shark, but with high chance of default), or plain simple off- farm employment, often sent by a family member working abroad or son/daughter in the bright lights.

Although I don't farm myself, (bar messing around with growing veggies in the back garden), I take great interest in others' farms and issues of sustainability in any farming operation. The main issue I think for someone like Thai Farmer to consider before setting up such a venture is to really ask yourself "what do I want from being a farmer?" Is it maximum financial return, easiest workload for the family, best option environmentally-speaking, or do you have some other priority which you think is most important? Give us some idea of your personal philosophy in undertaking such a venture and, perhaps, I can give you some general advice that might be useful one day. I think Wash's words are very sage and he talks from the gritty end of farming, which is the best place to learn this "trade unlike any other".

Hi again TF

Regarding the loan "business" to be honest I am not at all happy about it. My wife's father was murdered when she was aged 7 by one (or some) of his debtors. Her neighbours subsequently stole the family rice from the fields and two of her brothers died of starvation - you can imagine that she has a few axes to grind in the village!

She lends at 5% PER MONTH (yes 60% p.a.) and has people queuing up to borrow. I have forbidden her to lend any more - however she returned a few weeks ago talking about a loan she made to a guy who I particularly mistrust for the way he treats his wife. She has never thrown anyone out of their land and I think she is probably in proft from the enterprise - however, I consider it unsavoury.

My wife's family are certainly not business people - I am trying to get them to commit to a business plan for the harvester - hopeless!

Hi Pnu,

How are you doing mate? Wow! Khun wifey must be raking it in at 5 % per month, which must make the income from agriculture seem negligible ( a good return from irrigated rice is around 1,000 baht/rai). And you'll soon be in line for a few new plots of land when then the poor neighbours default on their loans at that extortionate rate. (The present interest rate in banks is about 8- 12 % i.e. no more than 1 % per month). Lucky you!

So why, the question must be asked, do the neighbours "queue up" for loans from your missus, rather than go to the bank? This is a semi-rhetorical question for the benefit of other posters, to try and understand one of the underlying causes of structural poverty, exploitation and concentration of land in the hands of the already wealthy that makes Thailand the "land of dreams" for a few and "land of nightmares" for the many. Sorry to uspet this interesting thread, but surely your family doesn't need to join the legion of circling loan sharks preying on the vulnerable, given the already diverse farming interests you have? "Unsavoury" is certainly one word for it.

Using Effective Micro-Organisms, on the other hand, is a great way of reducing the load of poisonous chemicals entering into the already polluted Isaan environment, especially waterways. To Mango Head and others, raising beef cattle (local breed crosses with improved varieties) and water buffaloes are probably one of the best ways to invest your money on the family farm right now. Much better interest rate than the banks can give you, and the price can only go up, as entrenched poverty forces others to sell while demand for meat increases.

sontaya...well, you know there are worse places and I presently have no alternatives...

but I have venom that I shall with hold in this instance...

a monitor lizard tried to eat my 18 month old niece this afternoon and I had to club it while chasing it away...so now I have a large brain damaged reptile living behind the house and stalking young children at play.

This would never happen in pasadena...

If that sucker gives you any more hassles, give me a call and I'll come round and deal with him (the monitor that is, not Sontaya). Pad pet hia - aroy maak! Yes, the variety of edible delights in this country does it every time! And it shouldn't happen to a vet in Pasadena neither.....

PM needs to pause and think

What can go wrong will go wrong. From the euphoric New Year's Eve celebrations just three months ago, when the country and the world lay at his feet, Prime Minister Thaksin Shinawatra has fallen dramatically into a nightmare world of unexpected disasters, confusion and crisis.

Nobody could have predicted the speed and depth of his descent. In fact, on New Year's Eve, quite the opposite question was on everybody's mind. ''What could possibly shake the prime minister's iron grip on the country?'' The answer for most people was little or nothing at all.

Then came the explosion in the deep South, bird flu and the Electricity Generating Authority of Thailand privatisation debacle.

- Kanjana Spindler is Assistant Editor, Editorial Pages, Bangkok Post 2004-03-31

I don't know: the decline of Toxin's star wasn't that unpredictable. All the signs were there about 18 months ago that his amazingly extended honeymoon period was not going to last forever and the bill for his profligate, populist but immensely damaging to the nation, self-serving policies were going to come back and haunt him sooner rather than later. ######, even some of the normally upbeat mor - du's were predicting a crisis for Tox around April this year, so if they could see it coming, then anyone with an ounce of gnauss, had this one singing out of their crystal balls.

Having said that, Kanjana Spindler is one of the most perceptive and normally rational contributors to the Bangkok Post editorial page and deserves full marks for this courageous piece in the age of shunts to inactive posts for Post editors. Let's hope she keeps eternally active in exposing the present follies of a bare emperor, to an audience who probably needs little convincing. The main problem is connecting with the millions of voters out there, hooked like junkies on TRT credit and pacifying game shows on the box.

I remember IT posting up an appeal from Matthew a few months ago requesting "volunteers" to go and be witnesses to the human rights abuses going on with the Akha and to protest about the arrest of 2 young foreign activists for doing exactly that - witnessing the brutality of the state forces against defenceless people. The posting attracted a lively debate for a few days and then faded away. Firstly, I'd like to ask IT whatever happened to those 2 girls - were they deported - or allowed to stay in Thailand? and secondly, has the case of the Akha been forwarded to the Thai Human Rights Commission or Amnesty International yet? These are two potential allies for the Akha, even though both organisations are overstretched with a multitude of cases as it is. Worth a try.

'you can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your friends' noses'

remember that...

Who sez Tuts? I've seen many a Thai pick his/her mate's puckered nose, as a sign of undying friendship, and me toes went all curly at the narak-ness of it all. But whether you can get extra immunity from your puan's blooters is a point the good Dr from Austria doesn't address. I would also have thought that dried black bogies after a day in BKK would be one of the less healthy dishes I would recommend for anyone to nibble on.

As always, any post that mentions the word "Muslim" draws out all the narrow-minded, racist bigots from the woodwork, so rather than try to attack your flawed thinking individually or collectively, I'll recount a little anecdote from a recent holiday to Langkawi Island (note: a predominantly Muslim place).

I was sitting on the beach watching the world go by and spotted a man of Arab appearance about to take off on a parasailing trip round the bay. Up he goes and his progress is followed closely by his wife dressed head to foot in black and just a narrow slit gap in her headress, through which she was videoing hubby in the air. 10 mins later he touches down and gets out of the harness and then rushes up to the Mrs and gives her a great big hug, lifting her off her feet. They embrace passionately for about a minute then he puts her down and they walk up the beach into the sunset holding hands and talking excitedly about? his experience in the air? what they were going to do that night? Who knows, the point is that they were just like any other couple on holiday, in love and were sharing a good time together.

But you know, seeing this couple made me think that as far as I can remember in all the years I've lived in Thailand I don't think I've ever seen a Thai couple embrace as passionately as this couple. Young couples nervously holding hands in the park is about as far as the public displays of romance goes in Thailand it seems. So what does this signify,- Thais (who are predominantly Buddhists), don't love their wives (yes, plural) as much as Arabs (who are predominantly Muslim)? Or that Arab women are more liberated than Thais in showing their emotions in public? No, of course not, only that one shouldn't fall into racist stereotypes about one religion, race or visibly different group of people from ones own.

Similarly, anyone who continues to equate Muslims and terrorism, shows they have the intellectual agility of a sloth, an invertebrate or an unicellular creature going by the initials of GWB.

come on, she's as guilty as that hardened criminal 9 year old who maliciously crashed his push bike into a taxi and ended up in jail until his parents paid the damages.

Somebody say sommat about "rough justice"? It's time for about a thousand Donal Macintyre's to get active methinks. Which reminds me, anybody ever see that episode he did on drugs in Thailand and he went over the border to Burma and got a bit too close to a yaabaa factory and the militia started shooting at him. Borderline frolics - loadsafun.

Religion is the cause of all the evil in this world, that be christians, jews, muslims or whatever, so far the only non violent faith I have seen is the Bhudist's

When was the last time you went to Sri Lanka then?

Slippery balcony syndrome seems to know no boundaries - young and old, male and female. Stick to low rise buildings, where a slip can do know worse than give you a bruised backside is my lousy advice, fwiw! And avoid 13th floor at all costs!

Sad I'll miss it this year - in the UK on a contract.

Last year was seen in the back of a pick-up with two water pistols, 15 bottles of water covered in talc-paste, whizzing up and down the roads around the Grand Palace (BKK) - having a riot.

No worries about acid in BKK - throwers would get torn to pieces by the crowds!

Songkran is always dangerous - what was it 700 odd deaths in BKK last year?

Sounds like the old belt may have a few notches in it, Wolf. But 700 is just boasting pal! The whole country saw a mere 500 sawbs last year, and that's 500 too many! So thank your lucky stars you're in UK this year and not at the front line of Songkhran songkhram

If you're still not convinced check out a letter in yesterday's B. Post which showed it was statistically safer to be in Iraq than Thailand, even the South!

But do you know the reason of death? Lack of driver control in the pick ups that ran over them or knocked them off their scoots. There were 3 on one cycle right by my house that ended up under the front of a pick up that ran upon them and drug them under his rig for about 100 meters before getting stopped.

You mean Kev, not only did this lousy driver run over the poor kids, but he tried to drug them as well? What was it - yaa baa or pong khao? Tssk, some people will stoop to anything!

Does khon Kaen have the coolest weather in Thailand? Is it less humid that other parts of Thailand? what are average temperatures? thanks!

jim

NO. NOT REALLY. 25 - 30 C in "cool season", 35 - 42 C in hot season, like right now! Brief answers I know, but am in a hurry. Go to Loei or Chaing Rai mountains for "cool" weather, Khon Kaen for "cool" people!

Before panicing too much about getting more than a hairful of klong water this Songkhran, note that the report does refer specifically to Yala province, so as long as you're not planning on celebrating NEW Year down in those troubled parts, you should be okay.

Nevertheless, IMHO Songkhran has gotten to the point where it is no longer "sanuk" any more (reached that about 10 years ago in fact, but I've been grinning and bearing it ever since), and this year I've decided to vote with my feet and wallet by moving out of LOS for the duration. Actually tried it a few years ago and went to Burma, but found that was almost as soggy an experience as Thailand, for 2 days at least. However, the way the festival drags out these days is ridculous, unless one happens to be a water pistol seller, or now it seems, even a seller of H2SO4!

Chok Dee Bee Mai tuk khon!

The Thai Elite Card is more than just membership to an exclusive array of services and facilities. If you look at it from an investment perspective, you will see the true value in joining it. If you believe the Thai economy is going to boom in the next few years, if you believe land and property prices are going to increase, if you believe more and more visitors are going to come to Thailand through the new airport, if you believe that a piece of land in your own name will be worth much more in future than now........then the thai elite card is valuable as an 'option' to own land. This is similar to options in financial markets. You can choose to exercise your option and go on to purchase land in your name, or choose to do nothing. This option has no expiry date, and it is also tradeable in the sense that it is transferable.... your option fee is 1mil baht and can choose to give it up for a fee of 100000 baht. Think about it.

You're aving a larf ain't ya? About 20,000 people on this site "thought about it" and rejected it out of hand as a total scam. Even the Admins and that's saying something! either they don't think Thailand is on the verge of your mega boom (it's just had it, me old china!) or they think that they could spend their million baht better off on other VIP services. (Now how many soapy massages could you buy for $25 K? Think about it salesman! ) And I'll say it again: IF YOU HAVE THAT KIND OF MONEY KICKING AROUND, YOU'RE ALREADY A VIP HERE! (which is probably why they've only managed to "sell" less than 500 of the blasted things, despite a marketing spree running into the billions.

Good to see the boys at the AgMin are going out of their way to keep Joe/Somchai Public up to date and in the picture with bird flu. The Khon Kaen case was IDed on March 25th and they only just told us? Ta much Newin! Nothing like being a pro-active, tireless worker for the good of the country.

Not that it matters a jot now that the press have lost interest in this story, but thanks George for keeping (some of us) up to date on this lurking menace. Somebody in the AgMin is going to get a very nasty shock one of these days when this virus mutates and jumps the species gap big time. It's a time bomb.

Lager or Ale, 2 choices.

I come from a country where we have a few hundred different beers and I like most types, lager and ale and ...

And this is probably what I miss most from my "home" country, the variety of beers,...

I'm with you on that one Bluecat (minus the lager bit!) - if only one could nip down the offie and get 8 different bottles of "4 for a fiver special" on real ales and a good curry down the Indian, before going out on the town for a major sesh with the lads, eh? Are we talking about the same country I wonder?

Having the incredible choice between Sing, Chang, Leo and Heineken is not what the "free market" is really about. Funny how the whisky market is more liberalised than the beer market. Another case of Amazing One.

Let's just hope that San Miguel have the good sense to resurrect Black Tiger Beer - the best beer ever brewed in Thailand, at the fairest price. I used to buy loads of the stuff at 35 baht a pop, but my quality of life in LOS has been severely diminished since TAB pulled the plug on this nectar. Could still be found in some out of the way corners of the Kingdom in limited amounts about 6 months ago, but would be interested to know if anyone has seen Black Tiger lately??

San Miguel are lager louts, so sadly don't think there's too much prospect of a decent ale coming out of the brewery any time soon Fisherman.

Horrid Practice one has to admit- though Eric still trying to slip is his way out of his ladyboy practices!!!

Poor young Eric, is he ever going to be allowed to forget that little bit of indiscretion with Lola?

The only exposed flesh that should be covered up this Songkhran is that of beached whales (usually lobster red in colour), that insist on showing the rest of humanity their ample girths and folds of lard in totally unsuitable locations in Thailand. The beach is one thing, but when displayed on the streets, I'm all for laws on banning it or calling in a Japanese whaling boat.

What's the betting DL's "normal kid on the street" daughter doesn't do more than a week's hard labour at Mc D's. If she does, I'll eat my staw hat and she'll have a severe case of zits to show for it. Still, no point fretting too much, she'll be able to afford a good facial makeover on those genereous wages, eh?

It's hot over Songkran and the water throwing damages the dresses. So my recommendation, go top-less, which is better than spagetthi and or blouses. I promise, I will not look

Aye-Aye Axel!

Next those bright sparks at City Hall will be banning wet T-shirts and checking all girls for bras at the entrance to Khao San road. Come to think of it, I might even apply for a job like that. On second thoughts, nah, some of those hairy arm-pitted, tatooed farang shielas would put me right off my khao tom breakfast and I'd soon call in sick.