scottiejohn

A zoo had acquired a rare species of gorilla but although the female was in season, they had no male gorilla to mate with her. In desperation they asked one of the keepers whether he would be willing to have sex with the gorilla for a hundred dollars. The keeper asked for a little time to think about the idea. The following morning, he went back to the zoo bosses with his answer. ‘I’ll agree to have sex with the gorilla,’ he said, ‘but on three conditions. First, I don’t want to have to kiss her. Second, I want nothing to do with any offspring that may result from this union.’ ‘Yes, that’s all fine,’ said the zoo bosses. ‘What is your third condition?’ The keeper said: ‘You’ll have to give me another week to come up with the a hundred bucks.’

A Roman gladiator walks into a bar... ...and holds up two fingers. "Give me five beers, please." Give me five condoms, please. "Do you want a bag?" "No, she's not that ugly."

Who is the we? Is it the "Royal" "WE" or are you advertising a company?

How much was in the brown envelope?

Not if they are the ones doing the drinking; No police action to be taken against Keir Starmer for drinking a lockdown beer - Chronicle Live

The (non physical) penny will soon drop!

Was that mixed doubles?

They have basically, "accepted" (forced to accept) all the previous ones so why should they not "accept" another one? PS; This is not France!

Then why stir it?

To (Bit)coin a phrase!

Priceless!

All this talk of inactive posts has got me pondering the age old questions; a) How do you activate an inactive post? b) Do they have inactive shifts? c) Since COVID are they allowed to be inactive from home (IFH)? d) Is there a Head Office of Inactive posts and if so how is it manned?

A statement of the obvious to most of us non sex pests.

Why would anyone need or want to use an ATM on average twice a day every day for a month? I have my doubts regarding the veracity of the statement!

And they seem to be the first major organisation to do so in such a clear manner!

At last an organisation with the b@lls to do what is right! Watch the woke brigade get their nickers/underpants in a twist over this!

With your attitude I am not surprised! PS; Yes I am a Brit!

Doesn't say much for the rest of the world then!

That depends on your definition of a brothel! From the OED; brothel "a house where men visit prostitutes. ORIGIN C16: from Middle English brothel 'worthless man, prostitute'. If you replace "house" with "establishment" or similar then I would say there are quite a large number of them around!

They weren't even any good at that unless attached to a dog!

The so called crimes are the same as every official in Thailand does on a daily basis!

Because he knew the so called court was rigged against him and that he had no chance of avoiding jail if he stayed in Thailand!

Don't give them ideas. Since they probably gave them away to their cronies they will now be thinking of going out and buying more.