scottiejohn

A plane carrying Donald Trump made an emergency landing in New Orleans yesterday over what was thought to be a pending/imminent engine failure over the Gulf of Mexico. Turns out there was just a loud whine coming from the right wing.

A blonde and a redhead head into their ranch and find their bull is missing! The women plan to buy another one, but only have $500. The redhead tells the blonde, "I will go to the market and see if I can find one for under that amount. If I can, I will send you a telegram." She goes to the market and finds one for $499. Having only one dollar left, she goes to the telegraph office and finds out that it costs one dollar per word. She is stumped on how to tell the blonde to bring the truck and trailer. Finally, she tells the telegraph operator to send the word "comfortable." Skeptical, the operator asks, "How will she know to come with the trailer from just that word?" The redhead replies, "She's a blonde so she reads slow: 'Come for ta bull.'"

Four cannibals apply for a job in a big corporation! „Well“, says the boss, „if I hire you guys, you have to promise to not eat any of our staff.“ The cannibals promise that they will not eat anyone and get hired. Everything is going well for a while, and one day the boss calls them into his office. “You’re working well and all, but we’re missing an office cleaner. Do you have something to do with that?” The cannibals swear that they are innocent. The boss believes them and leaves the office and they all turn to their leader. “You idiots!”, he screams. “Who ate the cleaner?” One of the cannibals sheepishly raises his hand. “You fool!”, shouts the leader. "For weeks we've been feasting on directors, team leaders, project managers and human resource staff, and then you go and eat someone they'll actually miss!"

So my wife went missing. I went to the police to report her disappearance... The policeman asked “What is she wearing?” I replied “I don’t recall”. The policeman asked “What is her height?” I replied “Average”. The policeman asked “Weight?” I replied “Who knows?” The policeman asked “Hair colour?” I replied “Mmm what month are we in?” The policeman asked “Was she driving?” I replied “Yes”. B The policeman asked “Type of car?” I replied “A black BMW with a supercharged V8 3.0 litre engine. Generating 333 horsepower. 0-60 in 5.6 seconds. Eight speed automatic gearbox. Full leather interior, top of the range SAT Nav. Keyless entry and starting, low profile alloy wheels full service history. Oh and a thin scratch on drivers side door and......”. Don't worry sir......we will find your car.

What do you call a loaf of bread with 1500 horsepower? A Baguetti

Is there a specific reason for wanting to live in a "Gated Community"? Any time I have visited friends inside one I do not find them (the gated Communities) very welcoming and mostly out of town with no immediate access to basic things like 7/11's Big C etc!

For the OP! What has your doctor prescribed? I suggest a doctor is much more qualified to give you good advice rather than the potentially dangerous/quack responses you will/have been getting here!

I suggest the OP reads this or similar sites Trazodone Oral: Uses, Side Effects, Interactions, Pictures, Warnings & Dosing - WebMD or Trazodone - Wikipedia before following your potentially dangerous advice!

Are you Sherlock Holmes in disguise or an eminent Psychologist? If not I have no idea where you dreamed the ideas you have posted above! Why not wait for facts before posting such cr@p!

I assume you are on the stuff to type the above gibberish!

Where would he/they get the data from? It is not asked for on the TM6 or hotel registrations and religion is not based on country of passport holder!

Was it you?

Dis you dictate this message from your hospital bed to a friend to post for you?

A top astronomer who worked on Russia's failed space expedition has been rushed to hospital following the Luna-25 spacecraft's crash into the surface of the Moon. Russian astronomer who advised Putin's failed Luna-25 mission to the Moon is rushed to hospital over 'sharp deterioration in his health' - after unmanned spacecraft CRASHED | Daily Mail Online

Possibly by hacking into thethaiger website and planting this fake news!

They are a bunch of 'No Hopers' why draw negative attention to such a worthy worthless drug?

Maybe some people thought they weren't funny when posted the first time and thought "it's the way I post em" and decided to try again! ???? PS: I do find it a bit annoying to find the same memes posted within 24 hours. Obviously some posters do not read onwards from their last post! PPS; Sorry for the seriousness as this is a joke forum!????

Thank goodness! Who wants that SNP bunch of left wing wokies running anything!

I reckon you're possibly the decaded poster of the decade! OOPS; I meant to reference @transam not you!

Cereal first or milk first? Neither. Bowl first.

Now I am confused (even more so!) by your posts!

Only if you are entering into "Fools Mate"? The Fooles Mate— Beale, The Royall Game of Chesse-Play Black Kings Biſhops pawne one houſe. White Kings pawne one houſe. Black kings knights pawne two houſes White Queen gives Mate at the contrary kings Rookes fourth houſe Beale's example can be paraphrased in modern terms where White always moves first, algebraic notation is used, and Black delivers the fastest possible mate after each player makes two moves: 1.f3 e6 2.g4 Qh4# .f3 e6 2.g4 Qh4#.

Do you mean your "advise" is unwarranted?

It does in what mind they have made themselves to believe in! It also helps many to create a (fake) media/sports persona to make money! Very very few have anything to do with their REAL so called identity!

But at least the people he taught would have understood his "perfect" Thai! (no matter what language they were used to!)