scottiejohn

But he will end up with a smashing time of it!

Why insult toads?

Try looking and searching in Bangkok! I do not believe that the city of google is anywhere your stratosphere!

Maybe someone's prayers have been answered!

Hoping it is nothing serious and if so can you make it as long as possible "as the actress said to the Bishop"!

This should have been posted int the "Joke Forum" IMHO! ????

Don't need to! It is already great!

The fact that it is so obviously a ploy to disable the Rep candidate Is only in the minds(?) of the MEGA idiots!

A Canadian (insert any Nationality of choice) was having a coffee and croissants with butter and jam in a café when an American tourist, chewing gum, sat down next to him. The Canadian politely ignored the American, who, nevertheless started up a conversation. The American snapped his gum and said, "You Canadian folk eat the whole bread?" The Canadian frowned, annoyed with being bothered during his breakfast, and replied, "Of course". The American blew a huge bubble. "We don't. In the States, we only eat what's inside. The crusts we collect in a container, recycle them, transform them into croissants and sell them to Canada." The American had a smirk on his face. The Canadian listened in silence. The American persisted, "D'ya eat jam with your bread?" Sighing, the Canadian replied, "Of course." Cracking his gum between his teeth, the American said, "we don't. In the States, we eat fresh fruit for breakfast, then we put all the peels, seeds and the leftovers in containers, recycle them, transform them into jam and sell it to Canada." The Canadian then asked, "Do you have sex in the States?" The American smiled and said, "Why of course we do." The Canadian leaned closer to him and asked, "And what do you do with the condoms once you've used them?" "What a stupid question why we throw them away, of course!" Now it was the Canadian's turn to smile. "We don't. In Canada, we put them in a container, recycle them, melt them down into chewing gum and sell them to the United States." "Why do you think it's called Wrigley's?"

What do you call your angry French Auntie? A croissant!

When I was young boy teenager! At bedtime my mum's sister used to tell me stories with a happy ending. Just one of the benefits of having a Thai masseuse as an aunt I guess!

On the subject of cows! I told my daughter, “Go to bed, the cows are sleeping in the field.” Puzzled, she asked, “What’s that got to do with anything?” I chuckled, "Well, that means It’s pasture bedtime!”

A woman is making special hamburgers made of deer meat for her family for dinner one night ... She says to her kids "try to guess what type of meat is in the hamburger. Ill give you a hint, its what Daddy often calls me" Immediately his son says to his sister "What is mom on about, I thought all burgers were made from old cows!"

I wonder who fingered him?

Is it? That is not what the OP title says!

What is the topic?

I believe they come from chickens!

hardly needs a caption......... Yes it does! Which silly moo dropped that pile of dung there!

Why did you not post this more helpful post the first time rather than the dangerous BS you made on your third post on this forum re; reseting the BIOS!! I suggest that after that earlier very dangerous (to a computer) post that any advice you make regarding computers should be totally ignored!

BS!

Why insult hamburgers by comparing Trump to one of God's foods?

I think it is actually centered in Mount Krakatoa!

Five surgeons were talking about the best patients The first surgeon says, "Accountants are the best to operate on because when you open them up, everything on the inside is numbered." The second surgeon says, "Nah - librarians are the best. Everything inside them is in alphabetical order." The third surgeon responds, "Try electricians, man! Everything inside them is colour coded!" The fourth surgeon intercedes," I prefer lawyers. They're heartless, spineless, gutless, and their heads and butts are interchangeable." The fifth surgeon, quietly listening to the conversation, says, "I like engineers. They always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end."

How come he's still standing next to the doctor? I would have assaulted him, the spineless git for taking it without my permission!

I hope they are fresh growing leaves!