Hayduke

4 hours ago, webfact said:

Autopsy confirms death of key witness in Red Bull heir’s case was accidental

As clear as the evidence may appear…the ever-vigilant People’s General feels there may still be tomfoolery afoot.

Therefore, as the government’s self-appointed 'Autopsy-Verifier-in-Chief', the General will personally conduct a third autopsy on the second autopsy…that resulted from...the first autopsy. He will be assisted by the Honorable 'Vice-Autopsy-Verifier' Prawit who, with many dead friends, has a wealth of experience confirming whether of not someone is actually dead.

Once the subject's death is officially confirmed...he will be eligible to be released on bail.

6 hours ago, webfact said:

Thank heavens for amulets! Two escape death as jetski explodes on Bang Saen beach

New Immigration requirement…effective immediately

Upon arrival in Thailand, all Farang are required to lease a personal protection amulet. Government certified amulet dealers will assign the correct amulet based on scheduled travel plans and activities.

Farang visitors are required to secure an amulet with a minimum rental fee of 50,000 Baht per week. This fee will be accompanied by a refundable deposit of 100,000 Baht.

All amulets must be returned prior to departing the country so the amulet can be recharged with magical powers and recycled for further use. Deposits will be forfeited if the amulet is returned damaged and/or contaminated by evil spirits.

NOTE 1 : The government assumes no liability if the amulet is not used properly

NOTE 2: This requirement does not supersede previously existing Immigration insurance conditions...which remain in force.

1 hour ago, webfact said:

Are Thailand's coronavirus numbers too good to be true?

I genuinely hope it’s true. But the government has such a long and unblemished track record of:

-ignoring/hiding/covering up information they don't like...

-persecution of anyone who releases information they don't like...

-persecution of those who disagree with any government agenda...

-refusal to accept/admit to unpleasant truths...

-falsification of statistical data to satisfy a government-approved narrative…and…

-compulsively lying about almost anything and everything…

....that it's very difficult to believe anything they say at face value.

You have to wonder.

25 minutes ago, webfact said:

Prime Minister wants to clear any public suspicion about Mr. Jaruchart’s death, but he will not interfere with course of justice.

No surprise here....bold, decisive action by the people's general.

Compete government honesty and incorruptibility....along with total respect for the course of justice have always been high priorities for Democratic Thailand.

The people, as always, place complete trust in the General...and know that he invariably has sound reasons for having the dead arrested.

Thammasat law professor insists Red Bull scion’s case can still be revived...

This is outrageous. It’s astonishing that anyone could even suggest this.

How can they possibly reopen a case when the Yoovidhyas have already paid to have the case closed? This would make a laughingstock of the Thai judicial system...which everyone knows is “one of the best in the world.” A first class legal system would never accept massive bribes and then refuse to deliver.

Hopefully responsible and honorable members of government will prevail and the respectable Yoovidhya family will receive the premium, high-priced justice they have already generously paid for…

2 hours ago, rooster59 said:

Panel grills ‘Boss’ case investigators

Okay....with 7 years to think up an excuse…the best story Thailand's finest legal team can come up with is....

-His dentist gave him a few lines of coke while he wasn't looking…

-Driving slowly and carefully on his way home a police office committed suicide by  

 driving his motorcycle underneath his car....

-And when he got home, he got drunk to ease the terrible psychic pain of seeing the

 car he had worked so hard to buy, vandalized.

And this story no doubt arrived with an astronomical stack of legal bills.

Amazing Thailand.

1 hour ago, rooster59 said:

Amnesty International urges police chief to stop criminalising peaceful protesters

Amnesty International is an idealistic, humanitarian, and well-intentioned organization…which explains why no one ever listens to them.

24 minutes ago, Litlos said:

Time to buy shares in a brown envelope manufacturer as the circle of interested and affected parties appears to be expanding, of course then there is the PM and another committee. 

 

Incentive payments to some low level, insignificant lackeys may arrive in envelopes….but the General graduated from envelopes years ago. His share of the Voovidhya swag will arrive in the usual...well-guarded army vehicles.

15 hours ago, webfact said:

PM uncomfortable with the prosecutor’s decision to drop Red Bull heir case

A classic case of "Buyer's Remorse"...

He sees now that 300 Million wasn't nearly enough.....he could have easily hit them up for at least a Billion. He feels so used...so taken advantage of...so unappreciated.

But cheer up General....it's not too late. Just send a few dozen of your loyal goons trusted administrative assistants by the Yoovidhya HQ to renegotiate the deal.

5 hours ago, webfact said:

The academic group said protesters have exercised their rights in line with democratic politics,

And the government will exercise their right to intimidation in line with the “Tyranny for Idiots” handbook.

5 hours ago, webfact said:

'Delicious taxes': Thai protesters use Japanese cartoon hamster to mock government

A diabolically clever tactic…

Challenge the nonsensical and ridiculous clowns in government to an endless game of “Who can be the silliest?”

Okay General…your move. Surely someone with a closet-full of comic opera costumes can ‘out-silly’ a bunch of youngsters.

2 hours ago, rooster59 said:

Army chief calls for discretion in exercising rights, pointing at protesters

Dear Protesters;

We must inform you that your request to exercise your rights by criticizing the government is disapproved. You have the right to appeal this decision within 7 days for final disapproval.

Signed,

The Army

18 hours ago, dinsdale said:

Personally I can't see him going quietly. Don't be suprised if a few bombs start going off or being found. 

You may be very well be right.

After all…Prayut (and Suthep) conspired to create the 2014 street violence which gave Prayut an excuse to hijack the government. Lies, fraud, and treachery are a major part of his job description.

And Prayut has already shown that he is more than willing to attack and inflict harm on the Thai people…to get what he wants.

He's been a greedy, immoral, hypocrite for years and it's made him filthy rich...he's not going to stop now.

17 hours ago, webfact said:

Drafting of soldiers in the new normal

More timely, innovative, and bold thinking from Thailand's military elite.

Slave labor for Thailand’s many thousands of brave, patriotic, Generals must be absolutely fit and ready to serve. The rigors of national security demand nothing but the best slave labor available.

It certainly wouldn’t do to have some feeble, unhealthy, non-socially-distanced soldier shining the General’s 'new normal' shoes or washing Mrs General’s 'new normal' designer underwear.

14 hours ago, snoop1130 said:

18 illegal Myanmar migrants, Thai woman land in jail despite offer of bribe

For a transaction of this type, a 70 K ‘incentive payment’ is terribly insulting.

Vigilant, hardworking government officials risk their lives protecting the homeland against evil foreigners. They deserve fair and appropriate compensation for their selfless, heroic efforts.

This now the “New Normal Bribery”...and wrongdoers cannot expect discounts.