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Three Russian men were sent by their company to attend a convention in Moscow. All three shared a hotel room. Two of them cracked open a bottle of vodka, but the third just wanted to sleep. The two drinkers got louder and louder as the bottle emptied, telling each other political jokes. The third man, kept awake by the noise, grew angry. He went outside for a smoke. On his way back to the room, he stopped at the front desk and said, “Please send a pot of tea up to room 23.” The two drunks were still being loud. The third man entered the room, looked at them, then leaned toward the light socket and said, “Comrade Major, please send some tea to my room.” The other two thought this was hilarious—until there was a knock on the door and a waiter appeared with a pot of tea. They immediately fell silent, and the third man finally got some sleep. When he woke up in the morning, he was alone. He went to the front desk and asked where his roommates were. “The KGB came this morning and took them away,” the receptionist said. The man was horrified. “Why did they spare me?!” The receptionist replied, “The Comrade Major thought the tea joke was very funny.”

At school one day, the teacher was trying to approach the topic of sex education and asked her students if they'd ever seen anything that was related to sex education on TV. Mary raised her hand and said she had seen a movie about women having babies. “Great,” said the teacher, “that's very important. ” Then Judy raised her hand and told the teacher she had seen a TV show about people getting married. “Well, that has to do with it too,” said the teacher. Then Johnny raised his hand and said he had seen a western where some Indians came riding over the hill and John Wayne shot them all. The teacher said, “Well, Johnny, that really doesn't have anything to do with sex education.” “Yes it does,” said Johnny, ” it taught those Indians not to f*** with John Wayne.”