Did you know, in Iceland, it's illegal to have sex on Christmas Eve and you could be arrested if caught participating in the act?
I'm not sure about Tesco or ASDA, but I imagine they're the same
.
My wife wanted something with diamonds in it for Christmas.
That was five days ago, but the doctors are still trying to remove the pack of cards from my rear.
My wife was admitted to hospital after having a funny turn. When I got there I found her covered in coconut milk and spices.
I asked the doctor what happened?
He said they had to put her in a medically induced korma