Shiver

I learned a sneaky little trick.  I tell one of the dogs how selfish their human mum is by not doing xyz.  Of course I'm talking to her and not the dogs, but for some reason that gets through whereas just saying what I would like is ignored or not heard.

History changes and many things suddenly never happened, and everything is acceptable and available as part of her role in the relationship. 

Now I know a little bit what it might feel like to be Milton Ericson. ???? 

My story was not that different to yours when I first got into my current relationship.  I don't want to make public what happened, except to say it wasn't infidelity, extortion, family being controlling or any of that stuff.

We're still together, and after correcting some misalignments I can honestly say after 9 years she's the best thing in relationships that's ever happened to me, and I've had some good ones.

I would suggest assess the family first, as that is what will give her the nature/nurture bias.  They can have enormous control over them, implied or explicit.  If they are genuine then you're most of the way home (assuming you're a decent person also).

What I did was test for gold digging tendencies.  Many different ways, and whether she's naturally that way or I've taught her, I don't know, perhaps a bit of both, but the family (when they were alive) were grateful for 5K a month (she had 20K, then zero but open access to cash, and some other variants as I was learning - these days I give her zero monthly, but make sure she has a chunk in the bank, as it gives her a feeling of security and independence, but interestingly makes her extremely frugal when it's her own money.  That could be a 'pro tip' as it'll sort the women from the kids, and you get to fail early before investing heart/mind and of course cash) ...as it was more than any other offspring could offer the grandparents, and the grandparents used it to pay for their funerals (200K each I think), as they didn't want to be a burden.  I covered everything asked of me, but that everything was pretty modest to be honest the way it turned out.

I honestly believe that if we were to break up, she would stay alone for the rest of her life, and is closer to her dogs than she is obligated to family siblings.  Don't want to make her sound like some weird 'cat lady', she's in demand, sociable, my friends adore her for the most part (exceptions being those that are aligned with me, so if she's good for me then they're happy, others would be the other way around ???? ).

I know I'm just talking me, me, me, but perhaps you can see a version of your situation in that.

Yes it does exist (genuine people in a good relationship).  Language and culture I don't mess with too mut, we just each create our boundaries and don't over step.  So it's a fairly shallow relationship in some ways, and concrete in others, but if you're not needy but want teamwork, you can hit the jackpot quite a lot easier than expected.  Better to stay away from tourist traps and rentable fun, but even there I've seen people have success stories.  So long as you're honest with yourself, it kind of jolts everything else in your domain into alignment and to be honest with you too.  If it works better for them when being selfish means it is also in alignment with the group success as well, that disincentivises the "51% attack".

12 hours ago, uhuh said:

"Beautiful Thai girl" 

 

Used to have black hair - now mostly reddish

Used to be small and petite - now eating KFC with visible consequences

Used to have black eyes - now often blue contacts

Used to have brown skin - now the darkest people on the BTS are farang tourists

Used to powder her face to look white - no need anymore,  now she is white

Used to have white teeth - now green or pink braces

Used to have a small nose - now it is operated during puberty 

Used to have small breasts - now has silicone bags

 

Altogether a new race on this planet,  a.k.a. zombie

I know what you mean.  They're born with natural beauty, then they start modifying things, often permanently.  I encourage my girl to use as little makeup as possible (by compliments or none - I don't tell her what to do), and she usually uses little more than moisturiser or perhaps a little lipstick, unless she really wants to feel special for her birthday, christmas etc.  For most normal daily events she can be showered and ready to go almost as quickly as me.

The other week we went to have a meal with a friend and his wife, who had the full works on, must have taken an hour.  She was chatting with my missus and they got on pretty good, but I could see the other girl wasn't comfortable, though my missus didn't seem to notice, then the other wife confessed that she wanted to take it off "as it was too hot" outdoors that evening in the cold season.  Listening to my farang friend after hearing that, it turns out that he is the one pushing her to wear it, so she wasn't doing it for herself much at all.  He was oblivious to how he was imposing.

18 hours ago, hyku1147 said:

"Nohm suay tilac" "Kit wa koon na rak, yim waan, nohm aloy"

I tell my girl constantly how much I adore hers (and other features both physical and behavioural), but she just dismisses it as if I don't mean it (though I do).  If a friend or customer makes a compliment she laps it up.

Confused in Udon.

Why not just put a couple of grand (western) on escrow, so if they don't like you they can kick you out at your own expense?

7 hours ago, SkyNets said:

And......Que story of helpful taxi driver returning an unusually large amount of cash left in his cab to a tourist!

"Disaster: person does the right thing and makes headline news".

One of the less attractive facets of some societies, and I'm not just Thai bashing.  It's all over the globe.

800K is Baht, and any other currency in the world doesn't count.

If I could to buy a currency today at the price from 3 months ago, I'd own Forex in a heartbeat, but that's not the way it works.

If you're going to stay for a year then 800K is not that big a risk.  You can send a limited amount outbound anyhow, within capital controls limits.  If you're reasonably well off then you don't sweat it.  If you have to be very careful and make ends meet then that's no position to take a gamble from, and a safety play makes more sense.

You could buy an Option with a 3 month expiry on it, so you'd have limited liability and no ceiling on gains.

Love the "around the island" one way or round trip.

Ask for half way, but travel back with them.

I'd ask them repeatedly if they can change USD for EUR and offer them a small markup for their inconvenience.

5 hours ago, JohnnyBKK said:

Been in Thailand for 11 years, I'm moving soon out of Thailand.

Thailand is not fun anymore, always stressed by the ongoing corruption, police checkups, immigration headaches. I feel persecuted even if I never did anything wrong. Thai people don't like foreigners anymore.

This time I stayed 2 whole months in Dubai and life is so much better than in Thailand, I will try to move definitely soon.

 

Also Thailand is now very expensive compared to before, for the same price you can have x2 quality of life in Dubai.

I'm not about to leave, but the only reason is my lady and also a couple of friends.  Everything else I can find elsewhere on a better platform.

I will be travelling in the coming year though, probably solo, just to see what's out there.  I think I'll have a hard time getting my girl to move permanently though.  I think it would be great to level the language department and make ourselves equals, and likely create a lot of understanding finally re the challenges we face in being 2nd class providers with restricted rights.  I'd pay for that lol.

5 hours ago, JohnnyBKK said:

Been in Thailand for 11 years, I'm moving soon out of Thailand.

Thailand is not fun anymore, always stressed by the ongoing corruption, police checkups, immigration headaches. I feel persecuted even if I never did anything wrong. Thai people don't like foreigners anymore.

This time I stayed 2 whole months in Dubai and life is so much better than in Thailand, I will try to move definitely soon.

 

Also Thailand is now very expensive compared to before, for the same price you can have x2 quality of life in Dubai.

I'm not about to leave, but the only reason is my lady and also a couple of friends.  Everything else I can find elsewhere on a better platform.

I will be travelling in the coming year though, probably solo, just to see what's out there.  I think I'll have a hard time getting my girl to move permanently though.  I think it would be great to level the language department and make ourselves equals, and likely create a lot of understanding finally or the challenges we face in being 2nd class providers with restricted rights.  I'd pay for that lol.

Bit confused now.  Is this whole product or just non THC extract?

If there's a day where it becomes an optional topping on a pizza menu, then the future suddenly looks bright.

On 12/12/2018 at 9:18 AM, simon43 said:

.....  Eat more calories than you burn and you will gain weight.  Eat less calories than you burn and you will lose weight.  ......

Not sure I agree.  I once tried to get a diesel truck to eat gasoline.  Plenty of calories in it, but it didn't do the same as my petrol car.

13 minutes ago, rocart said:

Don't know, after all 69 million speak Thai in the world and only about 1.5 billion or 20% of the world's population speak English - the vast majority of them from income rich tourist target areas.

...and it's *the* International language.

8 hours ago, bluesofa said:

Irrespective of not being interested in conversing in English, all technology uses English words in its vocabulary by default.

My son (in M1) had to ask me about 'LED' 'laser' and 'infra red' and what the words meant, despite learning to use them in a Thai language environment.

I wondered the same when I was forced to Learn Latin.  Now I wish I'd applied myself more.

"Unpaid work" is a term that has all kinds of holes in it, which I'm too lazy to write about since I don't see it making a drop of difference, but....

Whatever the letter of the law, I think the gist of it is "don't take Thai jobs" and "don't mess with our capital controls".  If you're working online then technically I believe that would be outside the law, but probably ignored as it's only going to be beneficial for the country with cash inflow from outside the kingdom and spent here.  Still, I wouldn't shout about it if I were doing that (which I'm not btw... I hung up my job boots years ago).

If you want to teach a sport or something where the reward is pleasure and not money, they really ought to consider having a exception clause for that.

Does anyone see a security flaw in this? (identity theft leanings).

Will they put it on a blockchain, password or other?

I had a laptop stolen a couple of days ago, (2nd time, plus a phone a couple of years earlier).  7 police came to take pictures, video, interview, finger point photo opp.  They said I had to go to the station to give finger prints since my passport was left outside, and they wanted to remove my prints from any other prints that might be on it.  I said you already have them, look at your records.  But we need to take them again.  Why?  If they've changed then that implies that finger prints are not a good security model, and you can't prove I didn't steal my own laptop.

So for a licence ... Why would QR code prove what blood type the phone holder has?  It's not rocket surgery, but I'm not so sure that brain science isn't a factor.

On 12/12/2018 at 8:48 PM, Orton Rd said:

I often wonder what the divorce rate is between Thai women and foreigners, no official figures I expect.

There's a guaranteed way to avoid a divorce.

Any idea how to get AIS SMS's in English like the above example?  Local shop doesn't really do English like you might find in some more touristy areas.

On 12/6/2018 at 5:29 AM, kenk24 said:

Hi Shiv... Yes. I was slim as can be until about 30 yrs old... PM me your method and maybe I will give it a try and be your first guinea pig... thanks.

If you take Nicotinamide MonoNucleotide (aka NMN which is in the Vitamin B family), it is showing some promise in increasing health span.  It also gently helps resist weight gain in the way a more youthful person naturally would, it would also reduce your biological age.  That's not to say that you'll grow a full head of golden locks and erase wrinkles, but that you'll be squeaky and shiny on the inside.  Lots to read up on that, so would suggest you do a search on "NMN Dr Sinclair".

It seems to work more noticeably on older people than younger, effects like a lot more energy on demand, focus, 'wanting' to expend energy (ask a 4 year old to go to the end of the garden and they'll run there.  Ask a retired person and likely they'll make odd noises as they get themselves out of the chair and walk instead).  Good for endurance exercise as well - 15% is an often quoted increase.

One important addition that seems to get overlooked though, is that it seems to add energy for a few days, then you hit a wall and get the opposite.  This is easily overcome by taking a Methyl donor to supplement all the extra demand, and means it is sustainable year round.  One good candidate is TriMethylGlycine (also called TMG or Betaine).  Best way that is simple is get them as powders and add in a 1:1 ratio in a dropper bottle and top it up with water to dissolve it.  A dropper under the tongue 2 or 3 times a day in a strength to achieve maybe 500mg of each per day would be okay, it's not critical.  Better not to swallow it as it won't make it intact to the bloodstream as your digestive system and first pass of the liver will stop it.

3 hours ago, kenk24 said:

Just saw an in depth report by 3 doctors... they started with 90-95% regain lost weight... and the problem is the body strives to regain the weight.. they tracked and tested one lady - she had lost a lot of weight, continued dieting and exercising but due to body reset she had to lose an extra 300 calories per day [a 1.5 hour run] more than others of similar weight just to keep the weight off... I wish it were as simple as you say and it might be for 3-4 kilos but serious weight loss is not not not easy...

Although the "eat less, move more" is almost universally accepted, it's also universally observable that diets fail.  It needs some critical thinking.

I think the diet/exercise (in my own experience) is much like the 80/20 rule.  Also, if you're hypocaloric, your body is going to notice that and attempt to correct the situation, so I would say 'diets' (in the sense of restriction) and a bad move.

I found a way that at least partially overcomes this, where starting at 90Kg+ I could lose about  0.5Kg per day (not water weight), which I'm sure a lot of people will groan about as being impossible if you do the maths, but the point is I didn't diet at all, and didn't change any of my daily routine.  You have plenty of energy since the body is taking fat at will and using it.  I got this from reading white papers on mouse and rat studies, and even works on DIO/DIO and OB/OB animals (i.e. even if they're overfed or genetically predisposed to Obesity).  Two downsides; 1) very expensive for most peoples budjets. amd  2) seemed to pause working after about 10 days and would only resume if I stopped for a few weeks.

After several years of trying to work this out I think I've finally cracked it, and was about to start on a Monday, but broke an arm on the Sunday immediately before.  So, I'm not currently testing it as I have a strong belief that what not only pulls out the fat and stops you putting it back on, would also slow down bone healing and accumulating anything for new growth (eg. no good from dumbing myostatin).  If it turned out to work, I think because of the scale of the job and also because I'm a farang in Thailand and all the implications of working here, I'd probably just licence it, so don't really want to discuss the how's at the moment, especially since I can't prove that I've solved to duration issue where it fades off.  On the plus side it's fantastic for keeping blood sugar bang on normal range, and has been shown in animals that other side effects are all positive (eg.  All cancer cell lines it has been tested with it can arrest progress (*not* cure - emphasis needed there).

Bottom line, I think calorie restriction is not the way to go if you want lasting results.  If you were slim as a teenager thought then there are much less expensive ways to get back to that if you're prepared to take a slower route (eg. over a year or so).

On 11/23/2018 at 4:05 PM, bankruatsteve said:

A calorie is a unit of energy  There are different types of energy but a calorie is a calorie whether being consumed or expended.

Different efficiencies of engine though....

On 11/23/2018 at 4:05 PM, bankruatsteve said:

A calorie is a unit of energy  There are different types of energy but a calorie is a calorie whether being consumed or expended.

Different efficiencies of engine though....