The week that was in Thailand news: The lad’s certainly for turning.

 

 

Growing up into what passes for adulthood in England in the 1970s and 80s we were regaled by politicians who began to have advisers on image and spin who were as important as their senior policy teams.

 

Figures like Margaret Thatcher were among the first to truly understand how vital the public perception of their deeds and words actually was.  She realized that sound bites and image as much as the actual worth of anything in her manifesto were critical to enduring success.

 

In 1980 at the October Conservative Party Conference the legendary figure uttered the immortal words by which her famous speech would later be known as she made a play on the hot potato of the time, the political U-turn.

 

“You turn if you want to,” she uttered to rapturous Tory applause. “This lady is not for turning”.

 

Though she missed the nuance of her speechwriter’s reference to a 1940s play it was irrelevant – it helped to define her steadfastness and cement her “Iron Lady” image.

 

In comparison, General Prayut of Thailand – who recently claimed he is actually a politician and not a Khaki Kommandant – reminds me of that jelly sweet in watery milk that the Thais so adore.

 

It is sickly yet not actually sweet enough, its texture vaguely blubbery and wishy-washy. It just doesn’t stand up to culinary scrutiny – in fact it’s neither one thing nor the other, and as far removed from a serious dessert as my French ancestors could imagine.

 

Yes, it’s Prayut in a nutshell as he showed us once again in the last seven days…..the lad’s certainly for turning.

 

Hapless Big Too tried to wriggle out of his commitment made in the hallowed halls of “Mister Tump’s Wai Hao” that elections would be held in November.

 

Here we went again on a Looney Tunes trip.

 

Donald was happy last year that he didn’t Duck the election issue when they met, but he might feel a bit Goofy now the comparative military mouse has taken the Mickey.

 

The latest U-turn on the election is blamed on legal procedures and organic laws. Well, even Rooster knows what kind of stuff you need to grow organic veg.

 

Similarly this reeks of amateur politicking and frankly disrespect for the electorate who, with the possible exception of those disparate souls saved from marching to the north-east last week, deserve better than this after four years of relative patience.

 

How refreshing it would be if, despite the manipulation of the parliamentary set-up, the people were able to U-turn the activities of the military and set the country on a path not seen since the days of Anand Panyarachun or Chuan Leekpai.

 

How telling, and essentially how sad in illustrating the dearth of new talent, that this week Chuan – in his eighties and decidedly frail – was being touted as a possible Prime Minister.

 

Heavens above, even Privy Councillor Prem might have read that thinking he could stage a comeback as his own centenary comes knocking.

 

U-turns figured everywhere this week and I half expected the new tourism minister to come out of hiding to claim “A la Kobkarn” that Thailand was now the hub of U-turns and so well worth a visit.

 

So much so that when I saw a headline about U-turns and road carnage I thought that sense had prevailed at last and the police were now actually going to enforce the traffic laws.

 

Not a bit of it – this U-turn to end road carnage was actually a U-turn – three to be precise on Rama II road in Samut Prakarn. It looked great with a video showing a huge truck actually avoid killing anyone, only for the inevitable to happen at the end of the footage.

 

A motorcyclist was spotted sneaking through the barrier and crossing the road dangerously, a head shaking moment not missed by the Thais online who commented about nothing else except their accepted propensity for lawlessness, the very thing that needs the mother of all U-turns.

 

However, this national characteristic to reverse decisions that they never intended to follow will be seen in all its glory starting next Thursday. This marks the D-Day for the smoking ban on 24 beaches.

 

Watch how delay, compromise, lack of enforcement, forgetfulness, under-carpet-sweeping, committees and a massive dose of ‘mai pen rai’ and ‘graap-ing’ to the God of Tourism reduce this initiative within months, if not weeks, to the very ashtray of history.

 

For if we are talking sound bites and slogans like the Iron Lady used so well, maybe what with all these military types and the incessant road rage coupled with the habit of reversing, we could replace LOS with Land Of U-Turns.

 

Or LOUT for short.

 

Also featuring a considerable media U-turn on Thaivisa this week was the story of the French man and his Thai woman lover wanted for the murder of Giuseppe de Stefani in Phichit. On Monday they were reported arrested in Tak.

 

On Friday they were still on the run.

 

Though fortunately the chief cop in the region, where the couple mutilated and set fire to the 61 year old Italian, had had a couple of dreams in which the victim had appeared imploring him to get his skates on.

 

I kind of expected Giuseppe to have appeared earlier to debunk his ex-missus’s capture as surely he knew the truth of the matter looking down on this mess.

 

And a mess it was with bumbling bumpkin BiB all over the place, except the place where the suspects actually were.

 

Though thank heavens for sanity when the cops earnestly begged these disgusting miscreants to give themselves up for the sake of the image of tourism.

 

Rooster was wondering how many more unlikely stories could be linked to damaging tourism when I realized that Phichit plod were merely taking a leaf out of the Book of Moses after the Israelis who murdered a man in broad daylight in Samui apologized for that heinous crime.

 

Not murder of course, damaging tourism.

 

Whether it was the advice of a smart lawyer or a police request to wai “Phra Thong Thiaw” (the God of tourism) I know not, but reading a scurrilous comment on Facebook from a poster who shall remain nameless I shall give out my “Wag of the Week” award. In reference to Israelis he said:

 

“They are Arabs who are successful”.

 

Having grown up with legends like the decisiveness of the raid on Entebbe and the effectiveness of Mossad in kidnapping Eichmann I was left wondering that though the pair in Samui didn’t get away, they may yet have plenty of life on the outside in the not too distant future.

 

From the land of celebrity though at two ends of the pay scale came news of the “Most Hated German in Thailand” and “Lord Palumbo of Southwark”.

 

It’s interesting to note that the former, Benjamin Holst, is much more well-known to Thaivisa regulars despite barely having two Deutschmarks to rub together compared to His Eton educated Lordship who has 350 million sobs.

 

Rooster must apologize for coming up with the “Most Hated” moniker but I am pleased to say that I am an avid follower of arch-beggar and big leg Herr Holst’s Facebook page. And he told me personally from the Gambia that converting to Islam this week and calling himself Muhammed would undoubtedly help him sidestep a Thai immigration blacklist one day.

 

Indeed, with some of the riff-raff that calls Thailand in general and Pattaya in particular home these days he is probably right.

 

Lord Palumbo, meanwhile, was rumored to be an item with soap queen Kwan Usamanee (both her first names) even though he has lived with a woman called Pim in London for three decades.

 

It all seemed potentially messy and I was tempted to put recently married Herr Holst in touch with His English Lordship to provide some much needed Teutonic advice.

 

Another needing some marital know-how is hapless Norwegian Vidar Pettersen featured in Thaivisa exclusives this week. He had lost ten million baht, his son, all his possessions, his right of abode in Thailand and the cops in Nong Khai were driving round in his Merc.

 

“Exclusive” didn’t really seem the right word as, if the forum curmudgeons were to be believed, it happens to virtually every westerner in Thailand who says “I do” and even many of those who mutter “I don’t”.

 

And so to this week’s Rooster awards. The “Some U-turns are Worth It” award I would like to present in advance to His Generalness to encourage him to think again after putting legislation that could legalize marijuana on hold.

 

Even if he is not convinced that the country is entirely ready for recreational use he should bear in mind the sense of promoting Mary Jane for medicinal use and not stand back and watch other countries like Australia and particularly Canada cream off the lion’s share of what the BBC called a $55 billion worldwide market for pot as medicine.

 

Wouldn’t that be worth a few votes and help to bring some true happiness back to the people, sir?

 

Finally, I am going to stick my neck out here because even though we are still mired in January I would like to present my “Headline of the Year” award eleven months early for the story about the policeman taking an unusual selfie:

 

“Cop finds 200 meth tablets in Thai man’s anus then poses with his bum”.

 

My Irish friends would doubtless say it was all harmless fun.

 

Or just a bit of craic.

 

Rooster

 

 

-- © Copyright Thai Visa News 2018-01-27

6 hours ago, rooster59 said:

Donald was happy last year that he didn’t Duck the election issue

I just got that one

Of note regarding your U-turn reporting, how about helmets, smoking in restaurants/bars, riding in the back of pickups, pedestrian crossing lights, etc. LOUT fits.

 

 

Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect

 

But surely, it's only possible to 'turn', if you're going in a perceived direction to start with. Our LOUT leader wouldn't recognise 'direction' if the signpost was rammed up his rear.

1 hour ago, inactiveposter said:

Of note regarding your U-turn reporting, how about helmets, smoking in restaurants/bars, riding in the back of pickups, pedestrian crossing lights, etc. LOUT fits.

 

 

Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect

 

There's an idea for tourists to Chiang Mai;  come and visit THE pedestrian crossing light.

If there is an active city government, maybe they could install another one near Maya, with its 12 directions of traffic and no pedestrian lights.  Even the pedestrian 'island' has gone.

Thanks for alleviating my pain for a few moments again, whether it is due to my love of Thailand and Thai people, or the fractured shoulder, you have said more than any of the doctors I've seen could have.

The Rooster back on top form! Thanks for the perspective :)

2 hours ago, masuk said:

12 directions of traffic and no pedestrian lights

Sounds like good life-management, to me. You'd need to be on the Kamikaze side to even think of crossing the road, here. Give me a U-turn any day.

1 hour ago, Colabamumbai said:

Thanks for alleviating my pain for a few moments again, whether it is due to my love of Thailand and Thai people, or the fractured shoulder, you have said more than any of the doctors I've seen could have.

Try not to laugh or cough, OK? . . . or anything involving that arm, I suppose

Good article. In terms of the probable election delay, it will make little difference. Thailand never has had a system anywhere near resembling democracy and even with an election it won`t be any nearer. Enshrined in The Constitution is that at least 50% of the NLA will be from the military, thus blocking anything they don`t like. The power has always been with powerful families, the military and another institution and will be for the foreseeable future. The irony is that the majority who elect a government will have no real say in that government least of all help. There are no independent bodies to assist in a democratic process like civil service, judiciary, police. And last of all whoever has, is or will run Thailand will be corrupt, as it is endemic in Thai society.