Taking custody of a 3.5 year old child from a criminal mom

[TiredJosh]

Hello

Here is my issue, i have a 3.5 year old kid from thai lady who i've been taken care of last 1.5 years. Mom has no means to take care of the child for multiple reasons including financial and legal problems which have nothing to do with me. I let her go couple of years ago due to her gambling addiction. Having said that i always let her see the kid whenever she felt like. But she abused my good will by robbing my house multiple times. No matter how many times i warned her she kept doing it and in some point i had no choice other than pressing charges against her. After a couple of weeks i caught her and brought to police station. Long story short in police station she filled a document states that she can not take care of our child and agrees to give caring rights to me. Document was signed by her, me and a police officer as a witness. I withdrew the charges ( after that she got caught using drugs and somehow managed to owe 150k+ baht to Mityon motorbike dealer).This incident took place 1.5 years ago. Since than kid is with me. Now here is the part where things get tricky for me. Last month i was very busy of some business related matter which i'm planning to establish abroad. I asked grandmoms help to take care of the kid for a month. She agreed and took the kid to her village. A couple of days ago i went to grandmoms house to take the kid. She refused to give the kid back to me. I insisted but did not let the things escalate to a bitter level and left her house. I know i can take the kid back with a police officers escort cause i have the documents kids mom signed but i'm so tired of all these mess and looking for a permanent solution which would ideally be getting 100% custody. Any suggestions or advices?

[Odysseus123]

I think that you should get out now...and I don't mean to be heartless.

 

They can use the child whenever they want-and they will.

[TiredJosh]

Get out where? I would never leave the childs destiny to their hand. 

[Vacuum]

12 minutes ago, TiredJosh said:

Last month i was very busy of some business related matter which i'm planning to establish abroad.

Sounds like you'll need a babysitter frequently. Consider the advice from

Odysseus123.

[TiredJosh]

Basically i wanna be able to leave the country with the kid. 

[happylarry]

With the history that you have described then you should have no problem getting sole custody by going through the Thai courts.

HL

Edited June 24, 2018 by happylarry

[BEVUP]

Agree with above, but you are willing to do the best for your child

 

BUT, since you handed over your / wife child to Grandmother, you will be facing a drawn out battle you wish didn't happen ( I know you had no choice at the time, but BIIIIIIG MIIIIIISTAKE )

 

Your talking Thai Families ( Who wont worry about the Law & let you just keep fighting )

 

That bit of paper would not mean much to the police since it is only a personal agreement between 2 people (it's probably why they did it ) so they don't have to act in any way.

 

There would be plenty of Posts on here about the process, & hope you have the coin & time to battle on 

 

You said business abroad - Are you planning to take child abroad 

 

 

[TiredJosh]

Eventually i will leave the country and it should happen with my kid. I have time and financial means to follow the legal process. I have hard time to imagine a court which would not grant custody to me whereas mom will be searched by warrant due to her debt. And yeah, it was a collosal mistake to ask grandmoms help but we were always in touch and share the suffering created by her daughter. Still it was an idiotic move

Edited June 24, 2018 by TiredJosh

[happylarry]

Personal message sent with my wife’s phone number if you want to ask her advise as she deals with custody cases on a weekly basis, it seems.

HL

[cooked]

If your name isn't on the birth certificate you will have to get permission from the father or prove abandonment. The judge will be aware that in these cases the father may demand money. Thai courts do do their best to look after the interests of the child.

Good luck

[FritsSikkink]

On ‎6‎/‎24‎/‎2018 at 11:44 AM, Odysseus123 said:

I think that you should get out now...and I don't mean to be heartless.

 

They can use the child whenever they want-and they will.

Quality father speaking here, "and I don't mean to be heartless." so what do you mean?

It is utter disgusting to think like that.

[TiredJosh]

8 hours ago, cooked said:

If your name isn't on the birth certificate you will have to get permission from the father or prove abandonment. The judge will be aware that in these cases the father may demand money. Thai courts do do their best to look after the interests of the child.

Good luck

My name is in birth certificate. Mother is not in a position to demand money and clearly does not have means to take care a child.

[cooked]

19 hours ago, TiredJosh said:

My name is in birth certificate. Mother is not in a position to demand money and clearly does not have means to take care a child.

So that's a process less to go through. The traditional tendency is for a boy to be looked after by the mother, a girl by the father.

I think your next step is to go to the Amphur to find out their requirements concerning adoption, guardianship, right of custody etc

[catman20]

On 6/24/2018 at 11:44 AM, Odysseus123 said:

I think that you should get out now...and I don't mean to be heartless.

 

They can use the child whenever they want-and they will.

let them keep the kid, their putting a gun to your head and will try to blackmail you at every turn. move on and enjoy your life.

[Formaleins]

On ‎6‎/‎24‎/‎2018 at 12:02 PM, happylarry said:

With the history that you have described then you should have no problem getting sole custody by going through the Thai courts.

HL

I think you are correct, he needs to look at getting a court order to backup /replace the police document, I wish him all the best.

[thesetat2013]

On 6/26/2018 at 2:29 PM, TiredJosh said:

My name is in birth certificate. Mother is not in a position to demand money and clearly does not have means to take care a child.

i think what he and others mean to say is... you left the child with grandparents.. whats worse is they are thai gp.. this action alone is cause for them to lay claim to the child... given child is thai citizen they will have more power than you in keeping the child.. it is even possible they could lie and say you abandoned the child there for a month or more.. suggest you go take child an run back to your province... but check first with your province police first and a lawyer to make sure you are not breaking any laws in doing this. 

good luck.. but i think you made a big mistake in allowing gp to watch after kid.  it may have cost you the loss of child forever

[shaurene]

On 24 June 2018 at 12:02 PM, happylarry said:

With the history that you have described then you should have no problem getting sole custody by going through the Thai courts.

HL

 

On 26 June 2018 at 11:27 AM, FritsSikkink said:

Quality father speaking here, "and I don't mean to be heartless." so what do you mean?

It is utter disgusting to think like that.

Hi, hats off to you. You do need a very good lawyer, I can give you good contact there. From Khon Kaen. You will need the fathers permission.

if you want the kid now, take the police with you to get the kid. 

[Expatthailover]

On 6/24/2018 at 12:44 PM, Odysseus123 said:

I think that you should get out now...and I don't mean to be heartless.

 

They can use the child whenever they want-and they will.

'They'

Being thai people?

Grandparents?

Please elaborate

[Tbone999]

Do you have any friend within the family to mediate another meeting with the grandmother? I don't think she has any right to keep the kid. If not, then contact a lawyer or support group who deal with this kind of situation. It seems like it needs to go through the courts. You would always have to go through this route anyway and get full custody as you would NOT be allowed to take the kid out of Thailand otherwise.

 

[orientalist]

Here is the Amphur information on adoption, unfortunately in Thai:

https://www.bora.dopa.go.th/CallCenter1548/index.php/menu-general/12-service-handbook/general/44-adopted

[davjensteph]

 

first go to the police tell them you let the grandmother take care of the child for a month,and you had no reason not to trust her in giving the child back..now refusing..if they do nothing make sure it is noted...then get a lawyer give him the full story and ask him to apply to the fiamily court for custody..you are on the birth cert,you have all the details of her antics,you have a signed document from her counter signed by police so can backup your story.and go down that route.if they think she is not good for the child they will give you full custody 100%..having that you have the choice of where you want to live,without her permission..

[SOTIRIOS]

...you should have had her sign full custody to you when she was in custody...

 

...you should never have left the child with the grandmother...

 

...file for the child before the situation gets worse...

[Odysseus123]

Just now, SOTIRIOS said:

...you should have had her sign full custody to you when she was in custody...

 

...you should never have left the child with the grandmother...

 

...file for the child before the situation gets worse...

Yes.