Monday Joke

A woman named Jill stood up at her church's Testimony Meeting, or as some

churches call it, "Cry Sunday", one Sunday morning.

She took the microphone from one of the church ushers, and bared her soul to

the enrapt congregation:

I want to tell you about the awful accident that my husband, Jim, has

suffered this past month.

He was riding his bike, lost control, ran off the highway and hit a tree.

He was rushed to the hospital, and could have died, but thank the Lord, all

he suffered was a broken scrotum."

The congregation gasped in horror. The men in the congregation were

obviously uneasy and writhed in their seats.

Jim has been in terrible pain all month since the accident. He has trouble

breathing. He has trouble swallowing his food.

He can hardly lift anything, he's in so much pain, and he has missed work

because of it.

He can't lift our children up to hold them and give them the personal love

that they need.

Worst of all, we can no longer cuddle and have intimate relations.

He is in constant pain, a pain so terrible that our love life has all but

slipped away into oblivion.

I would like to ask you all in the congregation to pray for Jim, and pray

for us, that his broken scrotum will soon heal and be as good as new."

A dull murmur erupted within the congregation as the full impact of this

terrible accident sunk in, and the men in the congregation were visibly

shaken up with the thought that, "there but for the grace of God go I."

Then, as the murmuring settled down, a lone figure stood up

In midst of the congregation, worked his way up to the pulpit, obviously in

pain, adjusted the microphone to his liking, then leaned over and said to

the congregation:

"My name is Jim, and I have only one word for my wife, Jill.

That word is: STERNUM...!!!"