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A man walks into his doctor's office and whines, "Doc, you've got to help me; I've got a strawberry stuck up my ass."

The doctor pulls out his prescription pad and says, "I've got cream for that!"

A redneck walks into a bar with a wet, steaming pile of shit in his hands.

He looks over at the bartender with pride and says, "Lookie what I almost stepped in!"

Little Johnny asks, "Mommy, where do babies come from?"

His mother replies, "The stork brings them."

Little Johnny, puzzled, asks, "Then who ######s the stork?"

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