Man Beats Up A Woman

[JimmyCA]

I have a theory that more than a few expats who move to Thailand come from situations which they couldn't really control. It could be a lot of things but it's usually a bad marriage, sometimes a failed business venture or a job redundancy. Life here is different, there's a beautiful young woman who loves him, others compete for his favour, people come into his house and clean and polish and address him as Loong.

A standard mistake here he makes is in thinking he's changed, he's become stronger, more powerful.... how else would life be so good, it must be of his own doing, nothing to do with the new surroundings.

He compounds the error in thinking he can control things around him that he doesn't approve of; situations he would avoid like the plague in the home country, usually confrontational ones, fall into the realm of things he can solve, control if you like.

Eventually disillusionment then bitterness comes of this, it's stands out in so many posts in ThaiVisa.com.

Sceadugenga recommends that having too high opinion of ones abilities is not the key to happiness in Thailand. Keep away from domestic disputes with or without a bug zapper.

This is a truly GREAT post.

I've seen so many expats go from loving Thais to hating them because they start to understand that they are not as important as they thought they were when they first arrived on these shores.

It is not the Thais fault that a lot of us have no common sense!

So true ... at some point the rose colored glasses must come off and tourist type money stop flowing so freely .... when the thais do not give them the same attention, they realize it is only the money the thais want. It is the transition from tourist to expat.

[Bill97]

Where is everyone drawing the line of non intervention?

Everyone likely has their own place for the line and tomorrow will probably have moved it since circumstances will have changed. But that is just a wild guess, impossible for me to get Mr. Everyone to reply.

[mcgriffith]

I would like to posit that:

Those who want to intervene (in such a dangerous and volatile situation), do so.

Those who don't want to (due to perhaps a bit more real life experience)- call in the professionals.

Let's stop the chest thumping; this thread is getting stale......

[reasonstobecheerful]

Austhaied

It seems you read the post I decided to withdraw most of. Thankyou for your opinion but I don't understand it. I personally am unable to sit and watch a fit 40 year old standing punching an injured and dazed seated man in his late sixties.

To the forum....I joined this discussion to give my opinion albeit somewhat critical. I presume critical opinions are acceptable. That didn't merit rudeness from one poster or repeated bad language from an ex policeman who wierdly also sent me an unpleasant personal message. Goodbye.

Edited June 13, 2007 by reasonstobecheerful

[reasonstobecheerful]

correction to be precise:

from an ex policeman who wierdly also sent me an unpleasant personal message.

should read

an unpleasant message in my profile which was linked to me by email

Edited June 13, 2007 by reasonstobecheerful

[Austhaied]

Austhaied

It seems you read the post I decided to withdraw most of. Thankyou for your opinion but I don't understand it. I personally am unable to sit and watch a fit 40 year old standing punching an injured and dazed seated man in his late sixties.

To the forum....I joined this discussion to give my opinion albeit somewhat critical. I presume critical opinions are acceptable. That didn't merit rudeness from one poster or repeated bad language from an ex policeman who wierdly also sent me an unpleasant personal message. Goodbye.

1/ You never stated the fact the guy was old and seated.

2/ Take a chill pill, it seems your aggressiveness may play a part in your wanting to be involved.

3/ As others have stated you are not in Kansas anymore Toto, call the authorities then walk away.

4/ What is your reason to be cheerful if you are actually miserable ?

5/ Have a nice day.

[Nienke]

Whilst I have some sympathy with the opening poster and there may be room for an intermediate solution like horn blowing, headlights etc., frankly I think the general attitude here sucks, and this applies to less immediate situations where too many people don't like to get involved. We are in a society not an individual universe. It is reasonable to consider one's safety but I think, and I'm going to use an old fashioned word with exactitude, valour should come first and I don't see how one can not intervene. Actually it's not even valour, it doesn't even get to the thinking stage. One day it might be you on the receiving end and I hope you all get more help than you seem willing to give.

I really don't understand why some one who is expressing a mere opinion needs to be attacked as been done in this thread.

It might be that rtbc hasn't encountered many situations as described in the OP and others have. But it is NOT a reason to write such posts or even send nasty personal messages, only because he does not agree with the majority of the posters on this thread.

RTBC does made a valid point by more or less saying that the general attitude of people has changed. How many times we hear or read that somebody has been beaten up, got an accident or is getting raped, and NOBODY intervenes or helps out. Or worse, they say 'oooh' and aah' make pictures but don't reach out a helping hand.

Of course, other posters make valid points as well by saying that nowadays it can be bloody dangerous to intervene.

Personally, I join the majority of the posters. I'm not brave at all, don't have black belt, can't depend on my dogs as their attitude is "do it yourself' and, thus, will not directly interfere in situations as stated in the OP. Unless .... I'm convinced that I'm stronger, faster and smarter than my opponent/s, but well ...... sigh ...... that probably will not happen quickly, if ever.

Nienke

[Blinky Bill]

correction to be precise:

from an ex policeman who wierdly also sent me an unpleasant personal message.

should read

an unpleasant message in my profile which was linked to me by email

No doubt many readers have now looked at your profile. My comment which was not sent weirdly as you put it, but in the normal way was simply "He's not worthy of a comment". If you find that's unpleasant you are obviously very sensitve and have been living a very protected life.

Edited June 13, 2007 by Blinky Bill

[JuniorExPat]

Will somebody PLEASE close this topic before there is terminal overdose of Viagra, testosterone or a cocktail of the aforementioned.

JxP

PS:

Blinky Bill - please stop sending my wife dirty messages via my PM.

Edited June 13, 2007 by JuniorExPat

[Blinky Bill]

Will somebody PLEASE close this topic before there is terminal overdose of Viagra, testosterone or a cocktail of the aforementioned.

JxP

PS:

Blinky Bill - please stop sending my wife dirty messages via my PM.

[Ulysses G.]

Blinky Bill - please stop sending my wife dirty messages via my PM.

And please stop text messaging all my girlfriends at John's place!

[Blinky Bill]

Blinky Bill - please stop sending my wife dirty messages via my PM.

And please stop text messaging all my girlfriends at John's place!

So the secrets out.

[MiG16]

White Ribbon Campaign a worldwide initiative by men to address violence against women. The campaign invites men to wear white ribbons as a sign of their opposition to men’s violence against women. Wearing the white ribbon was a sign and a pledge not only to never commit violence against women, but to also not remain silent about it.

[Crow Boy]

White Ribbon Campaign a worldwide initiative by men to address violence against women. The campaign invites men to wear white ribbons as a sign of their opposition to men’s violence against women. Wearing the white ribbon was a sign and a pledge not only to never commit violence against women, but to also not remain silent about it.

Do they have one for men who have been beaten up by a woman? I once got a cast iron frying pan across the face as I came up the back step to my house, albeitly very drunk and noisy and at 2:00am. I opened the back door and "BOOOM!" by girlfriend knocked me backwards down three steps. Came to and had to go to hospital with a broken nose and the back of my head split open. Two black eyes - I looked like I had done 10 rounds with Mike Tyson instead of three steps with a 160cm woman.

No one came to my rescue and all my mates thought it hilarious

Spanish women - love 'em but oooooh what a temper

CB

[mcgriffith]

My Peruvian (ex now, thankfully) wife used to love throwing large dangerous objects such as crystal ashtrays, etc. Totally out of left field....

I moved out after my head almost got permanently "dented".

[Blinky Bill]

White Ribbon Campaign a worldwide initiative by men to address violence against women. The campaign invites men to wear white ribbons as a sign of their opposition to men’s violence against women. Wearing the white ribbon was a sign and a pledge not only to never commit violence against women, but to also not remain silent about it.

My hair is too short to wear a ribbon.

[Crow Boy]

My Peruvian (ex now, thankfully) wife used to love throwing large dangerous objects such as crystal ashtrays, etc. Totally out of left field....

I moved out after my head almost got permanently "dented".

Was that the reason why you face looks the way it does or was that just too much head banging on the Spotlight dance floor?

Back to serious - lots of guys out there have had a run in with a seriously wild woman intent on making some real changes to them. I was talking with AussieThaied last night about the number of times I have seen bars in Thailand erupt as some guy has had his head bashed in with a beer bottle because he didn't leave a decent tip or said some smart crack to a girl who didn't appreciate the jest. I narrowly averted a guy in my bar from being glassed with a beer mug from behind because he turned his back on a girl he had been chatting to and started up a new conversation with a second one.

A lot of girls around the bar areas in CNX carry knives and are not afraid to use them. They all claim that they carry them for protection when they are heading home late at night but I have seen it twice up here that a bunch of girls have suddenly pulled switchblades on punters and the fight has been on. Best advice in a situation like that is to grab your friends and GET OUT AS QUICK AS POSSIBLE AussieThaied told me his story and it is really scary because people don't think it is serious Wrong! In CNX it doesn't happen very often - or at least not in the more salubrious drinking holes I attend unlike the slush dungeons that many of the members on this thread seem to frequent. Guys like Blinky Bill, UG, and others who have been in Thailand for more than 10 years can tell you about some of the old time rough houses that made up the Chiang Mai scene. The old Kampaengdin road bars were dangerous and Pracha Samphan was worse. Around Kawilla Barracks - play the fool out there with the Army boys and thirty of them would happily dance on your head.

This thread started off with the very valid question "what would you do in a situation where a man was beating up a woman in the street" I think the answer is 1) assess the situation 2) if you truly think you can help the situation by getting involved then do so 3) if there is a likelyhood of you being added to the casualty list don't 4) realise that no matter what you do ie walk away or intervene - afterwards you will find things wrong with what you do and 5) don't become a victim by ignoring what is happening around you. Events like this rarely spontaneously occur. There is usually a build up and part of aquiring street smarts and surviving situations like this is to watch for the signs, avoid thinking you are John Wayne and that a bullet in the chest won't hurt. If in doubt, get out.

CB

[Austhaied]

White Ribbon Campaign a worldwide initiative by men to address violence against women. The campaign invites men to wear white ribbons as a sign of their opposition to men’s violence against women. Wearing the white ribbon was a sign and a pledge not only to never commit violence against women, but to also not remain silent about it.

My hair is too short to wear a ribbon.

You may not have any left on your head ol boy so just go for the "hippie look"..

[BigSnake]

One Sorry Sorry Ass man beat a women, no matter the reason, a coward of a man. Anyway I think you did the right thing in try to get help. 191 police beware. maybe the police thought you were just a friendly farang they should be more aware in the future.

[damian5000]

I'm going to go the opposite way on this one. Especially if the guy was my size or smaller (6' 175) and there was only one or two of them. When I see someone smaller getting picked on by someone bigger I immediately get a surge of adrenaline and usually act. I can't see 80% of the male Thais being able to physically compete with me. They're too small and maybe contrary to popular belief few of them know any type of martial art. Not that I do...I'M NO TOUGH GUY. AND I'M NOT SAYING IT'S A "SMART" DECISION. The adrenaline keeps me from thinking about my own well being, and I've often put myself in bad situations where I could of had my face kicked in or worse...Luckily I've weathered these storms pretty ###### well.

An example. I was working on the strip in Vegas and 2 relatively large drunk white guys were picking on this little mexican who was handing out stripper cards to tourists. Sayin' the mexican pick pocketed him etc... One of the white guys tried to steal his back pack. NONE of this mexican's boys were helpin' him (prolly cuz they're illegals), so I got myself involved and eventually the mexican and I through a physical altercation got the backpack back. Security starts comin and everyone jets.

5 min later I see the 2 guys. One pushed me and both were calling me pussy etc... in front of all these people... hot women and all. And I don't do shit. You know why? I had already fought the battle I needed to fight. While part of me walked away feeling like a pussy... I know I stepped up when it was time to step up.

[Ulysses G.]

Back home, you have a lot better idea of what you are getting into when you interfere in a situation and how serious things will get.

Around here, you can be beat to death for nothing, without ever understanding why.

[sibeymai]

Good advice Ulysses. Unless you really understand the situation it's best to do what you can to speed the arrival of the police, or see if you can get other Thais to take an interest. Other people's problems are seldom worth dying for.

[damian5000]

Back home, you have a lot better idea of what you are getting into when you interfere in a situation and how serious things will get.

Around here, you can be beat to death for nothing, without ever understanding why.

I react regardless of whether I'm "back home" or not. If it's 1 average thai guy slapping a woman in the street, he's most likely going to end up on the ground bloodied. I didn't say it was smart or the best thing to do. Just what I would more than likely of ended up doing with the situation presented by the topic starter.

[Blinky Bill]

I react regardless of whether I'm "back home" or not. If it's 1 average thai guy slapping a woman in the street, he's most likely going to end up on the ground bloodied. I didn't say it was smart or the best thing to do. Just what I would more than likely of ended up doing with the situation presented by the topic starter.

There's one born everyday..............

You just may be the one ending up on the ground bloodied.

Edited June 14, 2007 by Blinky Bill

[Ulysses G.]

...And then 15 of his buddies come trotting up.

[damian5000]

There's one born everyday..............

It's funny. That statement is what I'm going to apply to you. Can you read? I stated "most likely". Any idiot knows it could go the other way around and I'd end up bloodied. And for the third time....Didn't say it was the best or smartest decision. Just what I would do. But keep on downing someone that actually has the balls to stand up. And I'm sure you'll keep on walkin' or sit down...lay down? Or...whatever it is you would do

[damian5000]

...And then 15 of his buddies come trotting up.

Keep on making excuses for your lack of balls.

[Blinky Bill]

...And then 15 of his buddies come trotting up.

Keep on making excuses for your lack of balls.

I guess you're right there young man. Us old farts have no balls at all. Cowards and gutless bastards at heart the lot of us who are not stupid enough to risk our health for the sake of somebody else's personal dispute.

Did you ever hear the story about the young bull and the old bull?

[damian5000]

...And then 15 of his buddies come trotting up.

Keep on making excuses for your lack of balls.

I guess you're right there young man. Us old farts have no balls at all. Cowards and gutless bastards at heart the lot of us who are not stupid enough to risk our health for the sake of somebody else's personal dispute.

Did you ever hear the story about the young bull and the old bull?

I'm sure. But I think it's obvious... I forgot....laughing

[sibeymai]

good on ya Damian. The world needs more heroes. Takes the pressure off me having to be one.