Companion Agreements

[garyinthailand]

Here's one for you all.

Recently, I've started getting more serious with my Thai ladyfriend, and we're talking in terms of an 'arrangement'.

I accept that she's sincere, as in: she'd sincerely like to be supported by a farang. Fair enough. If she can take care of me and make me happy for the rest of my life, I'm also cool that she gets short and long-term ecurity in return.

Presently, she's in Ramkhamheing U., with two years to go (much younger than me, natch). I live in Hua Hin where I own a house. My intitial proposal will be along the lines that I support her in Bangkok until she finishes school, during which time she'll come to HH on the weekends to play house. After that, I hope she'll come to live with me, as I do find her company keeps me smiling.

I'm thinking that it makes sense for us to make our agreements in writing, as it may get a little complex and both of us may need reminding of what was agreed to. Some provision of dispute resolution and termination of agreement seems appopriate, too.

So, does anyone know if a 'companion agreement' of this sort can have legal standing in Thailand? Can I honestly protect myself, and at the same time reassure my ladylove that she's not going to be left in the lurch, although we're not planning marriage at this time? Any experience with this kind of thing?

Will be very intested in the responses.

[p1p]

I do not believe such agreements/contracts to be worth anything. If you wish to look after her, pay her an allowance / salary and perhaps make some bequest to her in your will.

You can have a seperate written list of her duties, but this will merely be a guideline.

[p1p]

Further to the above. ManyThai girls have "Sugar Daddies" to help them through their education. I'm afraid these providors frequently get dropped very soon after graduation, when they can become more of a hindrance than a help.

[Thetyim]

"ManyThai girls have "Sugar Daddies"

Where I live it would read "most Thai girls have Sugar Daddies"

Do her parents know about your relationship. If not she will most probably ditch you after she graduates .

Ask if you can meet the parents, the answer will be all revealing.

[garyinthailand]

Meeting 'Sis tomorrow, and have been asked to meet the parents in Fall.

[Yohan]

So, does anyone know if a 'companion agreement' of this sort can have legal standing in Thailand?

Legal standing or not, I think, such an agreement is worthless..... What can you really do, if she does not want to live with you later on? Or do you think, she will pay you back the money you gave her to finish her studies?

Maybe, you should make some nice open talk, to see what both of you really expect from each other.......

Waiting for years in HuaHin, while she is living in Bangkok is no good solution by my opinion....

Either she might find somebody else, or you might find somebody else in the meantime...or even this might happen to both of you....

[Jangot]

I've read the answer you are looking for many times in different variations in this forum.....Only put in what you are prepared to (or can afford to) walk away from (or to have taken from you!).

This would apply to both monitary and emotional.

Live for today; plan for tomorrow, but don't seek guarrantees on it.

You can't encapsulate happiness in a lawyer's letter.

[Digger]

Presently, she's in Ramkhamheing U., with two years to go (much younger than me, natch). I live in Hua Hin where I own a house. My intitial proposal will be along the lines that I support her in Bangkok until she finishes school, during which time she'll come to HH on the weekends to play house. After that, I hope she'll come to live with me, as I do find her company keeps me smiling.

I know three girls all studying at Ramkhamheng Uni who are all on the game together in BKK. Often seen milling around Nana car park, Q bar, Spasso, Novotel Siam Square etc. Everyone is well educated with excellent English and NOT like your typical bar girl.

In case you are not aware, this uni also has a LOT of distance learning programmes where you study from home to complete your degree. many girls have cottoned onto the fact that they can enroll in here and become a legit student but only turn up to enroll and then takes the exams. I also know 2 farang who are paying for their beloveds to do courses here from their homes. Point here is that a girl can easily be in the Uni but never go whens oemnthing or someone better comes along.

Also for my opinion, any agreement is not worth the paper its written on.

[dr_Pat_Pong]

Here's one for you all.

Recently, I've started getting more serious with my Thai ladyfriend, and we're talking in terms of an 'arrangement'.

I accept that she's sincere, as in: she'd sincerely like to be supported by a farang. Fair enough. If she can take care of me and make me happy for the rest of my life, I'm also cool that she gets short and long-term ecurity in return.

Presently, she's in Ramkhamheing U., with two years to go (much younger than me, natch). I live in Hua Hin where I own a house. My intitial proposal will be along the lines that I support her in Bangkok until she finishes school, during which time she'll come to HH on the weekends to play house. After that, I hope she'll come to live with me, as I do find her company keeps me smiling.

I'm thinking that it makes sense for us to make our agreements in writing, as it may get a little complex and both of us may need reminding of what was agreed to. Some provision of dispute resolution and termination of agreement seems appopriate, too.

So, does anyone know if a 'companion agreement' of this sort can have legal standing in Thailand? Can I honestly protect myself, and at the same time reassure my ladylove that she's not going to be left in the lurch, although we're not planning marriage at this time? Any experience with this kind of thing?

Will be very intested in the responses.

You won't be able to draft any form of valid and enforceable agreement as and between yourselves.

[maerim]

Meeting 'Sis tomorrow,

Always handy to have a spare, just in case of any problems.

[kenk3z]

I believe he's asking whether its possible to draw up a written document to protect his own assets from what is often called the "palimony" lawsuit. As in, she gave him the best years of her life, and now he owes her x,xxx,xxx Baht for dumping her for another. Or whatever different combinations of things gone bad.

Now that I've cleared that up, can you see if she has any friends that need tuition assistance for the fall semester?

kenk3z

[maerim]

As in, she gave him the best years of her life,

My first wife said exactly the same thing when we were getting divorced.

All I can say to that is if they were the best years, I am just grateful not to have had the worst years then.

[NedKelly]

Meeting 'Sis tomorrow, and have been asked to meet the parents in Fall.

A new season in Thailand ??

[garyinthailand]

Thanks for the input, everyone. The biggest thing I've learned from this is to be very careful when speaking of this, as it's easy to misunderstand intent.

The agreement I have in mind generally will describe what I propose to do for her, over a period of years, rather than being a set of leg irons for her. More like an incentive plan that makes it interesting and worthwhile for her to stick around and treat me well now and into the future.

The agreement could be terminated by either party at any time. She can go if she wants, with only future benefits lost. Likewise I can elect to toss her out and only lose money spent to date.

Interestingly, no one answered the question as to whether such an agreement can be a legal contract in Thailand. The lawyers tell me it can.

[maerim]

Interestingly, no one answered the question as to whether such an agreement can be a legal contract in Thailand. The lawyers tell me it can.

If this is the case how do you propose to enforce it if push comes to shove?

Sue her in the courts?

You might as well start trying to plait sawdust if you think that is the way to go because the results would be the same.

[thaihome]

The agreement I have in mind generally will describe what I propose to do for her, over a period of years, rather than being a set of leg irons for her. More like an incentive plan that makes it interesting and worthwhile for her to stick around and treat me well now and into the future.

In my experience, a piece of paper will not convince her of anything; your actions (or lack of) will tell her if you are sincere in your commitments and her commitment will be based on that.

TH

[Digger]

Interestingly, no one answered the question as to whether such an agreement can be a legal contract in Thailand. The lawyers tell me it can.

Have you any experience of the Thai legal system? Why do you think nothing ends up in court?

Most Thais do not want things being decided by a 3rd party where one loses face - work it out yourselfs and then every one concerned can come out feeling a little bit happy.

I think you really need to understand a little bit more about Thai values but unless I have misread this situation you dont have a clue at the moment.

Anything can be written down on paper but if the other side feels hard done by or resentfull (often the case with a Thai lady) the paper aint going to stop a bullet or a knife attack if they are so inclined.

Sorry to sound harsh but just trying to prevent you having problems further down the line...