Am I Rude?

[jamesc2000]

I don't get to see many other Farang where I live, as we are a bit remote, and the only time I usually bump into them is my trip to Phitsanulok every two weeks. There are about three other Farang in a 20 km radius of me. One English guy who I socialised with a few times but haven't seen in over two years, one Italian who I haven't met and only stays here part of the year and one old guy who I said hello to in the market a few years back but he completely blanked me (I still see him occasionally and we just ignore each other).

As I said we go to Phitsanulok every two weeks are so and invaribly end up in Tesco/Lotus or Big C. There aren't many Farang in Phitsanulok but I will always see one or two. When I first came to Thailand I would always smile at other that Farang who I would make eye contact with and sometimes even strike up a conversation. As I say it is not like Pattaya we are still very much a minority here. Anyway, I always smile at the Thais who I make eye contact with and they always smile back. I noticed that many other Farang would blank me and I would find this strange or even a bit rude. Then I thought about it a bit more and realised that the only thing we really probably had in common was our skin colour and the 'where do you come from?' & 'How long have you been in Thailand?' conversation gets a bit stale after a while. So for the last few years I too have got in the habit of blanking other farang. I don't mean anything bad by this and of course I would help anyone who I thought was in trouble.

Anyway I was in Tesco/Lotus Phitsanulok last monday and there was an old farang who I kept bumping into. As is now my routine I blanked him. After bumping into him for about the the 10th time however it was obvious that he was a freindly sort and wanted to chat. The problem was though that after you have blanked someone for a while it is actually a bit awkward suddenly acknowledging them (at least I think so). So I continued to blank him. Was I very rude?

Life is short! Just talk to the people you like!

Anyway isn't one of the reasons you like living in Thailand cos you like them nice friendly interesting smiling Thais and you just wanna avoid them boring Farang that just talks about the weather?

I can understand it might be hard to carry on a conversation from - its a hot day isn't it?

Edited July 7, 2007 by jamesc2000

[kratindaeng]

Anyway isn't one of the reasons you like living in Thailand cos you like them nice friendly interesting smiling Thais and you just wanna avoid them boring Farang that just talks about the weather?

nice friendly interesting smiling Thais? You obviously do not reside in Bangkok then!? 5555!

[philliphn]

I don't get to see many other Farang where I live, as we are a bit remote, and the only time I usually bump into them is my trip to Phitsanulok every two weeks. There are about three other Farang in a 20 km radius of me. One English guy who I socialised with a few times but haven't seen in over two years, one Italian who I haven't met and only stays here part of the year and one old guy who I said hello to in the market a few years back but he completely blanked me (I still see him occasionally and we just ignore each other).

As I said we go to Phitsanulok every two weeks are so and invaribly end up in Tesco/Lotus or Big C. There aren't many Farang in Phitsanulok but I will always see one or two. When I first came to Thailand I would always smile at other that Farang who I would make eye contact with and sometimes even strike up a conversation. As I say it is not like Pattaya we are still very much a minority here. Anyway, I always smile at the Thais who I make eye contact with and they always smile back. I noticed that many other Farang would blank me and I would find this strange or even a bit rude. Then I thought about it a bit more and realised that the only thing we really probably had in common was our skin colour and the 'where do you come from?' & 'How long have you been in Thailand?' conversation gets a bit stale after a while. So for the last few years I too have got in the habit of blanking other farang. I don't mean anything bad by this and of course I would help anyone who I thought was in trouble.

Anyway I was in Tesco/Lotus Phitsanulok last monday and there was an old farang who I kept bumping into. As is now my routine I blanked him. After bumping into him for about the the 10th time however it was obvious that he was a freindly sort and wanted to chat. The problem was though that after you have blanked someone for a while it is actually a bit awkward suddenly acknowledging them (at least I think so). So I continued to blank him. Was I very rude?

Life is short! Just talk to the people you like!

Anyway isn't one of the reasons you like living in Thailand cos you like them nice friendly interesting smiling Thais and you just wanna avoid them boring Farang that just talks about the weather?

I can understand it might be hard to carry on a conversation from - its a hot day isn't it?

I suggest that you move to my home State in the USA. "Michigan the unfriendly State". We never smile. We tend to have constant frowns on our faces. We always blank out other people should they ever dare to approach us in any public place. As for our females, if you look at them, they will blank you out, or look at you as if you were the most contemptable person on the planet. They may even indicate to you finguratively in a hand gesture their feelings towards you. And this is only if you happen to be walking looking straight ahead and do not avert your eyes when they appear right in front of you in the grocery aisle.

I wish I was in Thailand now!

Edited July 7, 2007 by philliphn

[garro]

I don't get to see many other Farang where I live, as we are a bit remote, and the only time I usually bump into them is my trip to Phitsanulok every two weeks. There are about three other Farang in a 20 km radius of me. One English guy who I socialised with a few times but haven't seen in over two years, one Italian who I haven't met and only stays here part of the year and one old guy who I said hello to in the market a few years back but he completely blanked me (I still see him occasionally and we just ignore each other).

As I said we go to Phitsanulok every two weeks are so and invaribly end up in Tesco/Lotus or Big C. There aren't many Farang in Phitsanulok but I will always see one or two. When I first came to Thailand I would always smile at other that Farang who I would make eye contact with and sometimes even strike up a conversation. As I say it is not like Pattaya we are still very much a minority here. Anyway, I always smile at the Thais who I make eye contact with and they always smile back. I noticed that many other Farang would blank me and I would find this strange or even a bit rude. Then I thought about it a bit more and realised that the only thing we really probably had in common was our skin colour and the 'where do you come from?' & 'How long have you been in Thailand?' conversation gets a bit stale after a while. So for the last few years I too have got in the habit of blanking other farang. I don't mean anything bad by this and of course I would help anyone who I thought was in trouble.

Anyway I was in Tesco/Lotus Phitsanulok last monday and there was an old farang who I kept bumping into. As is now my routine I blanked him. After bumping into him for about the the 10th time however it was obvious that he was a freindly sort and wanted to chat. The problem was though that after you have blanked someone for a while it is actually a bit awkward suddenly acknowledging them (at least I think so). So I continued to blank him. Was I very rude?

Life is short! Just talk to the people you like!

Anyway isn't one of the reasons you like living in Thailand cos you like them nice friendly interesting smiling Thais and you just wanna avoid them boring Farang that just talks about the weather?

I can understand it might be hard to carry on a conversation from - its a hot day isn't it?

I suggest that you move to my home State in the USA. "Michigan the unfriendly State". We never smile. We tend to have constant frowns on our faces. We always blank out other people should they ever dare to approach us in any public place. As for our females, if you look at them, they will blank you out, or look at you as if you were the most contemptable person on the planet. They may even indicate to you finguratively in a hand gesture their feelings towards you. And this is only if you happen to be walking looking straight ahead and do not avert your eyes when they appear right in front of you in the grocery aisle.

I wish I was in Thailand now!

philliphn, have you thought about applying for a job with the Michigan Tourist Board? You could really sell it.

Edited July 7, 2007 by garro

[philliphn]

I don't get to see many other Farang where I live, as we are a bit remote, and the only time I usually bump into them is my trip to Phitsanulok every two weeks. There are about three other Farang in a 20 km radius of me. One English guy who I socialised with a few times but haven't seen in over two years, one Italian who I haven't met and only stays here part of the year and one old guy who I said hello to in the market a few years back but he completely blanked me (I still see him occasionally and we just ignore each other).

As I said we go to Phitsanulok every two weeks are so and invaribly end up in Tesco/Lotus or Big C. There aren't many Farang in Phitsanulok but I will always see one or two. When I first came to Thailand I would always smile at other that Farang who I would make eye contact with and sometimes even strike up a conversation. As I say it is not like Pattaya we are still very much a minority here. Anyway, I always smile at the Thais who I make eye contact with and they always smile back. I noticed that many other Farang would blank me and I would find this strange or even a bit rude. Then I thought about it a bit more and realised that the only thing we really probably had in common was our skin colour and the 'where do you come from?' & 'How long have you been in Thailand?' conversation gets a bit stale after a while. So for the last few years I too have got in the habit of blanking other farang. I don't mean anything bad by this and of course I would help anyone who I thought was in trouble.

Anyway I was in Tesco/Lotus Phitsanulok last monday and there was an old farang who I kept bumping into. As is now my routine I blanked him. After bumping into him for about the the 10th time however it was obvious that he was a freindly sort and wanted to chat. The problem was though that after you have blanked someone for a while it is actually a bit awkward suddenly acknowledging them (at least I think so). So I continued to blank him. Was I very rude?

Life is short! Just talk to the people you like!

Anyway isn't one of the reasons you like living in Thailand cos you like them nice friendly interesting smiling Thais and you just wanna avoid them boring Farang that just talks about the weather?

I can understand it might be hard to carry on a conversation from - its a hot day isn't it?

I suggest that you move to my home State in the USA. "Michigan the unfriendly State". We never smile. We tend to have constant frowns on our faces. We always blank out other people should they ever dare to approach us in any public place. As for our females, if you look at them, they will blank you out, or look at you as if you were the most contemptable person on the planet. They may even indicate to you finguratively in a hand gesture their feelings towards you. And this is only if you happen to be walking looking straight ahead and do not avert your eyes when they appear right in front of you in the grocery aisle.

I wish I was in Thailand now!

philliphn, have you thought about applying for a job with the Michigan Tourist Board? You could really sell it.

I have done better that that I work for the State of Michigan!

[garro]

Well if your ever in Phitsanulok, drop into Tesco/Lotus and you will fit right in with us farangs with frowns.

[kratindaeng]

Well if your ever in Phitsanulok, drop into Tesco/Lotus and you will fit right in with us farangs with frowns.

Also you could possibly consider gaining succesful employment with the bunch of 'smiling happy staff' at Tesco Lotus supermarket, especially around the Thanon Phahonyothin area of Bangkok, such lovely smiling interesting Thai people.....

[jamesc2000]

Anyway isn't one of the reasons you like living in Thailand cos you like them nice friendly interesting smiling Thais and you just wanna avoid them boring Farang that just talks about the weather?

nice friendly interesting smiling Thais? You obviously do not reside in Bangkok then!? 5555!

I have never met a Thai in Bangkok that did not return my smile!

Maybe its city life that grinds the spirit of humanity out of us.

If Thailand should one day lose its smiling and friendly attitude then for me it would be a very sad day.

Lucky for me it looks like that is not happening soon but with the pace of urbanisation and industrialisation ...

[kratindaeng]

Anyway isn't one of the reasons you like living in Thailand cos you like them nice friendly interesting smiling Thais and you just wanna avoid them boring Farang that just talks about the weather?

nice friendly interesting smiling Thais? You obviously do not reside in Bangkok then!? 5555!

I have never met a Thai in Bangkok that did not return my smile!

Maybe its city life that grinds the spirit of humanity out of us.

If Thailand should one day lose its smiling and friendly attitude then for me it would be a very sad day.

Lucky for me it looks like that is not happening soon but with the pace of urbanisation and industrialisation ...

Ok so all Thai people like to smile at you in Bangkok, your lucky, very lucky. But in reality, luck doesnt come into it my young Jedi Farang, may the force be with you.....

[jamesc2000]

Anyway isn't one of the reasons you like living in Thailand cos you like them nice friendly interesting smiling Thais and you just wanna avoid them boring Farang that just talks about the weather?

nice friendly interesting smiling Thais? You obviously do not reside in Bangkok then!? 5555!

I have never met a Thai in Bangkok that did not return my smile!

Maybe its city life that grinds the spirit of humanity out of us.

If Thailand should one day lose its smiling and friendly attitude then for me it would be a very sad day.

Lucky for me it looks like that is not happening soon but with the pace of urbanisation and industrialisation ...

Ok so all Thai people like to smile at you in Bangkok, your lucky, very lucky. But in reality, luck doesnt come into it my young Jedi Farang, may the force be with you.....

My dear Master Jedi Obi Wan! As Master Yoda might say - A farang I certainly am not!

Maybe if its not luck then could you be suggesting it could be my dashing good looks?

[Globeliner]

I don't get to see many other Farang where I live, as we are a bit remote, and the only time I usually bump into them is my trip to Phitsanulok every two weeks. There are about three other Farang in a 20 km radius of me. One English guy who I socialised with a few times but haven't seen in over two years, one Italian who I haven't met and only stays here part of the year and one old guy who I said hello to in the market a few years back but he completely blanked me (I still see him occasionally and we just ignore each other).

As I said we go to Phitsanulok every two weeks are so and invaribly end up in Tesco/Lotus or Big C. There aren't many Farang in Phitsanulok but I will always see one or two. When I first came to Thailand I would always smile at other that Farang who I would make eye contact with and sometimes even strike up a conversation. As I say it is not like Pattaya we are still very much a minority here. Anyway, I always smile at the Thais who I make eye contact with and they always smile back. I noticed that many other Farang would blank me and I would find this strange or even a bit rude. Then I thought about it a bit more and realised that the only thing we really probably had in common was our skin colour and the 'where do you come from?' & 'How long have you been in Thailand?' conversation gets a bit stale after a while. So for the last few years I too have got in the habit of blanking other farang. I don't mean anything bad by this and of course I would help anyone who I thought was in trouble.

Anyway I was in Tesco/Lotus Phitsanulok last monday and there was an old farang who I kept bumping into. As is now my routine I blanked him. After bumping into him for about the the 10th time however it was obvious that he was a freindly sort and wanted to chat. The problem was though that after you have blanked someone for a while it is actually a bit awkward suddenly acknowledging them (at least I think so). So I continued to blank him. Was I very rude?

Yes, don't tar everybody with the same brush, that's why you have no friends

[kratindaeng]

Anyway isn't one of the reasons you like living in Thailand cos you like them nice friendly interesting smiling Thais and you just wanna avoid them boring Farang that just talks about the weather?

nice friendly interesting smiling Thais? You obviously do not reside in Bangkok then!? 5555!

I have never met a Thai in Bangkok that did not return my smile!

Maybe its city life that grinds the spirit of humanity out of us.

If Thailand should one day lose its smiling and friendly attitude then for me it would be a very sad day.

Lucky for me it looks like that is not happening soon but with the pace of urbanisation and industrialisation ...

Ok so all Thai people like to smile at you in Bangkok, your lucky, very lucky. But in reality, luck doesnt come into it my young Jedi Farang, may the force be with you.....

My dear Master Jedi Obi Wan! As Master Yoda might say - A farang I certainly am not!

Maybe if its not luck then could you be suggesting it could be my dashing good looks?

Chedi Master, It's perfectly normal for one to believe 'hey handsome man' in a land such as LOS, means you are 'different with special powers beyond your mastercard', you are not the first. May your wallet be powerful....and for you, as supreme, enlighten yourself thinking that Thai people respect you for your skills, you will become wise one day, and stronger....

[Mighty Mouse]

Well if your ever in Phitsanulok, drop into Tesco/Lotus and you will fit right in with us farangs with frowns.

Tesco/Lotus might be a good place to open a botox injecting clinic. It will eliminate those frown lines.

[sukanyacondo]

BIanking at Ieast is better than downright nastiness.

WaIking and taIking aIong the street in Iaos with my fiIipina friend (not Ioud, just normaI girIy chatter), big oId farang guy with a waIking stick gIowers at us and then spits out "Shut UP!".

Cantankerous oId sod. Zzzz.

Hmmmmmmmmmm not so sure about the "not loud" bit??? I dont know many Thais who dont have everything at a ridiculous volume. Its a joy to get in a taxi without the music blaring away and then their idea of good customer service is to flick it onto an English speaking station whilst using the phone, trying to drink from a palstic bag, and driving one inch form t he car in front.

[philliphn]

Well if your ever in Phitsanulok, drop into Tesco/Lotus and you will fit right in with us farangs with frowns.

Tesco/Lotus might be a good place to open a botox injecting clinic. It will eliminate those frown lines.

I am seriously considering Plastic Surgery to remove the permanent frown from my face. I am not exagerating either!

[villagefarang]

Has anyone ever considered that other people may have a life and not be lonely and miserable and in need of talking to every tom, dick and harry that crosses their path? On more than a few occasions I have felt imposed on by an overly friendly person. In my opinion they were the ones being rude by forcing themselves on me. There was no introduction or social context that made contact or communication wanted or welcome. Why is the pushy, intruder seen as the good guy and the quiet guy, going about his own business, is seen as the bad guy?

[garro]

Has anyone ever considered that other people may have a life and not be lonely and miserable and in need of talking to every tom, dick and harry that crosses their path? On more than a few occasions I have felt imposed on by an overly friendly person. In my opinion they were the ones being rude by forcing themselves on me. There was no introduction or social context that made contact or communication wanted or welcome. Why is the pushy, intruder seen as the good guy and the quiet guy, going about his own business, is seen as the bad guy?

Good point villagefarang. To be honest, when I go to the city I can't wait to get out of it again. It takes me two hours to travel back so I'm usually in a rush.

[qwertz]

You've all emphasised the vast different in outlook between Thai and farang concerning interaction with people.

As a Brit in Germany I've sometimes been described as "too polite".

I still can't figure how you can overdo politeness, I've always tried just not to be too pushy.

You can't know in advance how individuals will see or accept you.

Case in point: in a baht bus in Pattaya was a Russian woman with her young son and daughter.

I noticed the woman's handbag was hanging open and as good as crying out "please rob me" to the other passengers.

Her daughter, aged about 12, was wearing a Tshirt with the legend "Use Me".

So I mentioned the bag and asked if she understood what the girl's Tshirt was saying.

I tried English, German and then my minimal Russian.

She cut me dead, obviously assuming I was a pervert trying to jump her bones.

Then the boy explained to her what I was trying to say and she thanked me graciously.

We farangs have our feelings too, as garro is obviously pointing out, so maybe people are just avoiding being rejected when they avoid contact.