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Going short-time only, shallow or succulent?


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18 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

Just the amount of trafficking that has increased, along with the dead, raped and abused.

Death is usually the result of drug addiction, rape is an assertion of power. It's not about sex. Abuse happens with women on a daily basis, who are not prostitutes.

 

What evidence do you have the incidence of death, rape and abuse is higher among women who sell sex, compared with those who do not?

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7 minutes ago, hotandsticky said:

 

 

The alternatives of watching rice grow, or tapping rubber trees, or sitting in salas in the village with toothless old crones spitting out beetlenut juice is somehow less appealing than the job you describe. Many thoroughly enjoy the lifestyle.

The alternative to sitting in a rice field with betel nut eaters, or harvesting rubber and making 200 baht a day is having sex, mostly unprotected, with some clients who are very fat, stink, and make the girls do things a normal woman might never do, with a high likelihood of receiving an STD, some of which never go away and some that can kill. If you think many enjoy the lifestyle, you're wrong, as those links can attest. Try going home with them and staying with them awhile to see how they act. Not for a week, but a month or more, to see the real them come out,and what that lifestyle has done to their thinking. I know of several personally that married bar girls and their work came home with them all of those times. One was threatened by a former boyfriend with a gun. The others had boyfriends on the side, which ruined their marriages. Some survive, especially if they are taken way soon afte they get into the trade, but the longer they stay in, the more damage is done.They will never see their husband as more than a permanent john. Yes, you got them out from their job, but the mentality is still there, as having sex with hundreds of men does a number on anyone's psyche, especially if some of them were brutal.

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3 hours ago, Chwooly said:

Just curious, How is 1 person better then another? Don't get me wrong, The law abiding citizen is better then the rapest or child molesters but overall is a lawyer better or more equal then a bus driver? How do you come to this value judgement?

Shhhh.  He really believes he is, with his roomful of awards 🤣

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8 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

Out of touch with reality is a person defending a trade that kills and maims, abuses and threatens, and gets people addicted to drugs. Why? Because its cheap sex because they can't find or know how to treat a normal woman so feel the need to pay for it? Or perhaps there is a legitimate excuse? I still haven't heard any. A balanced view of life is thinking and acting morally, period. 

Is it moral to be dishonest? As it's practically guaranteed, you would still object to the sex trade, even if all the negative externalities you mention were removed.

 

You don't like the exchange of sex for money. I get it. Just don't exaggerate and lie to make your point. If sex work was only indulged by handsome, well behaved, respectful men - would you have a problem with it still? I bet you would, so cut out this nonsense about abuse and threatening behaviour. Yes that behaviour exists, it's a problem, no it's not nearly the majority. I don't even know where you pulled the nonsense about most of the money being made by bosses.

 

Since you believe abuse is such a huge problem and risk for the girls - sex workers will routinely give a small discount for a known safe/respectful  customer, right? Even you probably understand that's not true, maybe you would care to explain why.

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22 hours ago, Walker88 said:

Lots of funny ‘morality’ here, mostly an offshoot of Judeo-Christian ideology.

 

Someone asked if a guy cares if he has sex with a woman who doesn’t like him. Well, how about getting a massage from a woman who doesn’t like you? How about getting a dinner order filled by a chef that doesn’t like you? Is it only if particular body parts touch does it become reprehensible and immoral? By whose philosophy? Does one get bonus points at death for never engaging in any form---sex, massage, food, a tailor shop, car dealer, plumber---with someone who doesn’t like you? How are those bonus points cashed in the hereafter?

 

Some guys like a massage. Some like a ‘special massage’. One is okay, but the other is evil? Says who?

 

So a woman sells a service---her body as some say---for money. Maybe she enjoys her work, maybe not. To reduce to the ridiculous, how about the guy who goes to sewers and sucks out all the literal crap people have blown out their backside? He likes his work? He has sold his body for money, and gotten a bad smell for it. A women in P4P might sometimes have a good day at work. I seriously doubt the guy who sucks out sewers for a living ever has a good day at work.

 

I used to live in Japan. I dated many Japanese women, some from my office, some I met through friends. They seemed to have a very different view of sex than the guys lambasting short timers here. The women expected sex at the end of a date. It was considered fun…you know…a physical pleasure. I got used to it. I didn’t complain. I went local, so to speak. I did not feel used, as I could consent or not. Of course, if I asked a woman out, I tended to be attracted to her, so if she expected a nightcap, I was game for it.

 

The other evening I visited an agogo. I watched a number of men purchase the services of women and go out the door together. Some of the men were old and chubby. Others were young, fit and handsome…the kind of guy who has no problem getting dates. Both types just wanted some physical pleasure, or a special massage. But massage is only bad if special body parts are touched?

 

A lovely young woman came and sat with me. I bought her a few drinks. She was a university graduate, quite attractive, obviously intelligent, and quite fit from the gym. No tatts, no kids. She told me she likes sex. She said she sometimes went to clubs like Sugar or Levels, and if a guy hit on her she liked, she often went home with him. She said she realized she could make money doing that in an agogo. Her choice. I don’t impose my morality on her, and she won’t impose hers on me. She isn’t going to kill anybody, nor steal anything, so what harm is done? She says she chooses with whom she goes, so is under no pressure to do anything she doesn’t want. Faux moralists will likely see a problem with her. I see a woman who has chosen her own path, damn what anyone else thinks. In 100 years she, her customers, and all the moralists looking down on her will be dead, so in the overall scheme of things it means nothing….except she enjoys it and gets paid.

 

The negative mindset stems from lugging Western morality to a place nobody asked for it. If someone thinks themselves morally superior because they only touch particular body parts with women they believe love them, good for them. They can knock themselves silly. They can cash their bonus points for their self-perceived good behavior at the checkout window upon death.

 

Treat people with kindness and respect, and there is little wrong in that. A woman offers a service and is willing to provide it in exchange for cash. Moralists have no problem if the service is a massage or cooking a meal or doing a company’s accounting, but woe to those who purchase the service of particular body parts touching. Up to you. Just don’t impose your morality on others, and perhaps others won’t impose theirs on you.

 

All of this. All.

 

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36 minutes ago, jacob29 said:

Is it moral to be dishonest? As it's practically guaranteed, you would still object to the sex trade, even if all the negative externalities you mention were removed.

 

You don't like the exchange of sex for money. I get it. Just don't exaggerate and lie to make your point. If sex work was only indulged by handsome, well behaved, respectful men - would you have a problem with it still? I bet you would, so cut out this nonsense about abuse and threatening behaviour. Yes that behaviour exists, it's a problem, no it's not nearly the majority. I don't even know where you pulled the nonsense about most of the money being made by bosses.

 

Since you believe abuse is such a huge problem and risk for the girls - sex workers will routinely give a small discount for a known safe/respectful  customer, right? Even you probably understand that's not true, maybe you would care to explain why.

I neither exaggerate or lie. It's not the sex for money that really bothers me, it's the behind the scenes after they've left. . I guess they don't have the skills or patience necessary to find and romance a regular women. To each their own. There are women out there that are normal that can be dated if you're a decent man. I also didn't say most of the men who buy are hurting these women. In fact, most are just there to get laid cheap, although they do spread diseases to others who are unaware.

 

Most women in the trade are working for others, trafficked or coerced by someone, which means they don't receive all of the money exchanged. Freelancers do. There are children made from these transactions, as someone mentioned. Children that are left without fathers, which is not a good thing no matter what, more so when their moms leave that child with grandma because she doesn't have the time to raise them.

 

If you asked me what I hate the most in this world, it would be people who molest, rape and kill children, followed by human traffickers who sell, drug addict, abuse , rape and beat women and boys to comply. Thinking this isn't happening where you and others here visit is naive. This is what I'd like to see stopped. Women who's parents coerce them into prostitution because they want cash are lowlifes. If you have  a daughter, you want her to succeed in life, to find a nice man and have a family. What they want is cash, with absolutely no care for their offspring. Most of those that enter prostitution are from a background of molestation or rape. This is what they know, along with the low self esteem that comes with thinking you need to sell your body to get some kind of attention. After they're in it, they're hooked. Some do enter it because they think it's more money fast, not knowing what it entails when they're into it. Thinking many are happy with the lifestyle is ludicrous. How could you be happy having sex with strangers, many of whom are dirty, or smell? A woman liking sex is normal. Having it over and over again with strangers isn't. Again, this isn't about paying for sex as much as it's women and boys being victimized, controlled and forced into doing things because of fear, debts, family or trafficking. This is also about under aged children being forced into this slavery. Thinking it isn't happening as much as it is is living with blinders on.

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7 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

I neither exaggerate or lie. It's not the sex for money that really bothers me, it's the behind the scenes after they've left. . I guess they don't have the skills or patience necessary to find and romance a regular women. To each their own. There are women out there that are normal that can be dated if you're a decent man. I also didn't say most of the men who buy are hurting these women. In fact, most are just there to get laid cheap, although they do spread diseases to others who are unaware.

 

Most women in the trade are working for others, trafficked or coerced by someone, which means they don't receive all of the money exchanged. Freelancers do. There are children made from these transactions, as someone mentioned. Children that are left without fathers, which is not a good thing no matter what, more so when their moms leave that child with grandma because she doesn't have the time to raise them.

 

If you asked me what I hate the most in this world, it would be people who molest, rape and kill children, followed by human traffickers who sell, drug addict, abuse , rape and beat women and boys to comply. Thinking this isn't happening where you and others here visit is naive. This is what I'd like to see stopped. Women who's parents coerce them into prostitution because they want cash are lowlifes. If you have  a daughter, you want her to succeed in life, to find a nice man and have a family. What they want is the thinking of scum, with absolutely no care for their offspring. Most of those that enter prostitution are from a background of molestation or rape. This is what they know, along with the low self esteem that comes with thinking you need to sell your body to get some kind of attention. After they're in it, they're hooked. Some do enter it because they think it's more money fast, not knowing what it entails when they're into it. Thinking many are happy with the lifestyle is ludicrous. How could you be happy having sex with strangers, many of whom are dirty, disgusting pigs? A woman liking sex is normal. Having it over and over again with strangers isn't. Again, this isn't about paying for sex as much as it's women and boys being victimized, controlled and forced into doing things because of fear, debts, family or trafficking. This is also about under aged children being forced into this slavery. Thinking it isn't happening as much as it is is living with blinders on.


Two slices of bread short of a ham sandwich. A pity you have nothing better to do with your life than post fanatical rubbish on AN for 20 hours a day. Imagine what your life would be like without the ability that you have to use your keyboard to endlessly behave like a hot mess? 

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Just now, FriscoKid said:


Two slices of bread short of a ham sandwich. A pity you have nothing better to do with your life than post fanatical rubbish on AN for 20 hours a day. Imagine what your life would be like without the ability that you have to use your keyboard to endlessly behave like a hot mess? 

I could say the same about you couldn't I?

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1 hour ago, fredwiggy said:

 Of course there are a few who have other jobs, are students etc that ply the trade as freelancers for extra money but they are the minority.

False assertion. Female students here are known as sideline girls. It is estimated about one third of female university students are offering long-term or short-term sex to assist with their living expenses. They openly run advertisements in Thai media, which the average foreigner never sees. They are usually looking for sugar daddies. Not surprising when the average government debt for a degree is 300,000 baht.

 

It's not just Thailand either. My son was in a university dormitory in Melbourne for three years. 30 student  rooms, 27 female students, 3 males. He said he knew 10 of the women were selling sex on the side, two were even working in registered brothels.

 

He never said anything about his own sex life, but I reckon he did well with the leftovers.

 

 

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Just now, Lacessit said:

False assertion. Female students here are known as sideline girls. It is estimated about one third of female university students are offering long-term or short-term sex to assist with their living expenses. They openly run advertisements in Thai media, which the average foreigner never sees. They are usually looking for sugar daddies. Not surprising when the average government debt for a degree is 300,000 baht.

 

It's not just Thailand either. My son was in a university dormitory in Melbourne for three years. 30 student  rooms, 27 female students, 3 males. He said he knew 10 of the women were selling sex on the side, two were even working in registered brothels.

 

He never said anything about his own sex life, but I reckon he did well with the leftovers.

 

 

I'm not sure about one third. I know the more it's done, the more get involved, at least until they see the reality of it all. What I do know is what I saw published that said up to 70% of girls are molested by the time they are 17, with most of this done in schools. A girl that's hurt sexually ends up with low self esteem and damaged, and just like those that were hurt by family while young, are more prone to enter this trade. This is yet another reason I will leave with my daughter as soon as possible.

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Just now, Chwooly said:

Here is another assumption that annoys me, maybe I am the outlier but I go with these women because I don't want a relationship. I enjoy sitting in my condo, watching tv, playing on my computer, reading books and eating alone. Being in a relationship would mean I would have to go to entertain another, something I am not interested in doing anymore. Just this morning I decide that I wanted to take a trip, I don't have to coordinate with anyone, worry about their plans, or think where we will stay that is suitable or them. Maybe in my old age I have become more selfish, but I enjoy being able to sit by myself not have to worry about someone else.

 

I got tired of asking where should we eat/go/do/visit, Her "Up to you"  Me (Ok lets go here) her "I don't like" I get an itch, I call a girl, she comes over, takes care of my itch, I get to go back to living my life as I see fit, Society's need to ostracize those of us that like to be alone needs to end

What would you do if prostitution and the girls stopped? I understand being alone isn't what some like but end up that way for one reason or another, and I fully understand what a relationship entails. You can be really attentive and loving, kind and caring to a woman, then have her stab you in the back because that's all she knows. It's frustrating to say the least and I do understand a man's needs, but I'll still take that time and be patient, because the next one might be the one you can't live without, and she might feel the same.

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Just now, FriscoKid said:


You could, but then it wouldn't be true. Just like all the crazy and whacky fictional rubbish you post for 20 hours a day. 

Actually all I post are factual, including the links, topics and replies, which are studies done by professionals that are involved in the topics. Personally, I know quite a lot about a certain number of subjects from experience and reading, along with listening to those that are teachers. None of it is fictional, as the answers have shown, with links to back them up. I'm not here 20 hours a day, but then how would you know this unless you also were? My computer is left on all day, with AN up, so maybe that's where you get your false information from? Why would I bother trolling just to argue, as that makes no sense? I come here to help for the most part,and hear others who are in the same boat, to relate.

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7 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

What would you do if prostitution and the girls stopped? I understand being alone isn't what some like but end up that way for one reason or another, and I fully understand what a relationship entails. You can be really attentive and loving, kind and caring to a woman, then have her stab you in the back because that's all she knows. It's frustrating to say the least and I do understand a man's needs, but I'll still take that time and be patient, because the next one might be the one you can't live without, and she might feel the same.

I am at an age where taking matters into my own hands twice a week wouldn't be too onerous. 5555

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1 hour ago, hotandsticky said:

 

 

So that is not evidence of your judgementalism and ignorance ?

 

I clearly know a lot more about working girls in Thailand than you do. First, my companion tomorrow is not ST... secondly, you never lose your girl you only lose your turn. My current friend will be busy during high season and I am unlikely to see her for almost 3 months - perhaps a short time foray just to keep my hand in.

Maybe you do, as I'm not a professional john here but have a girlfriend. What I do is research, looking up things that interest me, and get answers from those who are unbiased and trying to help these girls either to get out of a dangerous trade, or help them to cope while in it. I don't take any advice from armchair quarterbacks who's only position is the purchasing and that think they know everything because they buy a girl here and there, not knowing where they come from, or go, after they've left.

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Just now, Lacessit said:

Are you for real? Why do you think it's called the oldest profession?

 

Men will always pay for sex, women will always sell sex. Whether they do it inside or outside the bounds of marriage is irrelevant.

 

This weeks' award for Most Ridiculous Hypothetical goes to............

Hypothetical question. I was merely asking him what his options would be if it wasn't available, as if you didn't already know this. Why would you bother to reply this way when you know what I was saying? And buying sex within a marriage isn't irrelevant, but one of the reasons some marriages fail. Infidelity isn't a joke.

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21 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

 This is yet another reason I will leave with my daughter as soon as possible.

Either your daughter has taken on your values, or she hasn't. Sod all you can do about if she hasn't, and it doesn't matter where she is on the planet.

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8 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

Actually all I post are factual, including the links, topics and replies, which are studies done by professionals that are involved in the topics. Personally, I know quite a lot about a certain number of subjects from experience and reading, along with listening to those that are teachers. None of it is fictional, as the answers have shown, with links to back them up. I'm not here 20 hours a day, but then how would you know this unless you also were? My computer is left on all day, with AN up, so maybe that's where you get your false information from? Why would I bother trolling just to argue, as that makes no sense? I come here to help for the most part,and hear others who are in the same boat, to relate.

You lie. Yes you flat out repeat your lies. You links are nothing more than some articles written by people who have the same idea you have. They are not backed up by actual world wide data.

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34 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

I neither exaggerate or lie. It's not the sex for money that really bothers me, it's the behind the scenes after they've left. 

Clearly not the case, since you keep bringing up how distasteful and abusive the customers are. How can someone engage in honest discussion with you, when you deliberately misrepresent your stance?

 

34 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

I guess they don't have the skills or patience necessary to find and romance a regular women.

Why is this even worth mentioning? The women often don't have the patience to work a regular job, and that's fine.

 

34 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

I also didn't say most of the men who buy are hurting these women.

You plainly implied that. As if it's not most of the men, then why did you mention abuse, maiming and death as the core issue?

 

34 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

although they do spread diseases to others who are unaware.

Yet another red herring. Presumably you have a problem with casual sex as well, which goes some way to explaining why you don't much like the idea of transactional sex. 

 

34 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

Most women in the trade are working for others, trafficked or coerced by someone, which means they don't receive all of the money exchanged. Freelancers do.

 

Complete nonsense, most women in Thailand keep the lions share of the money. That's the nature of competition. Do you think a girl is going to accept dramatically lower income than a freelancer, giving most of it to the boss, for no particular reason? Do you think beer bar owners are reaping windfall profits??

 

34 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

There are children made from these transactions, as someone mentioned. Children that are left without fathers, which is not a good thing no matter what, more so when their moms leave that child with grandma because she doesn't have the time to raise them.

It's not a good thing. Tarring the entire sex trade as bad and immoral hardly helps the issue. Unwanted pregnancies among sex workers is very likely lower than for casual unpaid sex in places like New Zealand. So are you making the argument sex work is better than casual sex?

 

34 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

Thinking this isn't happening where you and others here visit is naive.

Not denying there are negative externalities, what we disagree on is the scope. If this is your issue, you should stop muddying the waters by talking about how socially incapable of awkward, or generally unpleasant the customers are.

 

34 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

Most of those that enter prostitution are from a background of molestation or rape.

 

Most women, across the board (any job), have experienced molestation or rape - so stop with these deceptive representations.

 

34 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

How could you be happy having sex with strangers, many of whom are dirty, or smell?

This doesn't actually matter to you though, so stop being deceptive about it. I asked you quite clearly if all the customers were respectful, whether that would be ok. You didn't answer, and shifted to how many are smelly. Next up, many are fat or unattractive, right?

 

34 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

Thinking it isn't happening as much as it is is living with blinders on.

So focus on that instead of adding all the extra noise. Stop watering down the core issue, with repeated claims about how most customers must be dodgy and generally unpleasant.

 

The fact you didn't respond to my question about why sex workers don't usually offer any kind of discount to good customers speaks volumes.

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2 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

Hypothetical question. I was merely asking him what his options would be if it wasn't available, as if you didn't already know this. Why would you bother to reply this way when you know what I was saying? And buying sex within a marriage isn't irrelevant, but one of the reasons some marriages fail. Infidelity isn't a joke.

I actually think my marriage might have endured if we both had been able to have a bit on the side. I was captive to the concepts of duty and responsibility for far too long.

 

It was a liberating experience when I broke free.

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On 8/20/2024 at 1:58 AM, SoCal1990 said:

First off, why is it anyone's right or business to say something condescending about another person's lifestyle, especially someone else whom they personally know nothing about? 

But truth be told, the guy living the short-time lifestyle might be a lot happier than the guy judging him and who feels stuck in a married position. And perhaps it's the guy who is not living the short-time lifestyle who is actually the one who's feeling sad. 

 

=========

There. I cut out the stuffing for you and now your "do as I say and not as I do" message is clearer.

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3 minutes ago, Lacessit said:

Either your daughter has taken on your values, or she hasn't. Sod all you can do about if she hasn't, and it doesn't matter where she is on the planet.

I think most men who comes to Thailand will be formed by the environment either they like it or not. Pattaya have a different expat environment than Hua Hin, even the same is present both places. 

 

If Thailand provided more security for girls and women, especially single moms, there would be less prostitution. Higher salaries and higher pensions would also ease the pressure on girls to provide for their parents. 

 

Not only illegal for women to prostetute themselves, but also illegal to buy sex, would changed the marked dramatically if there where real consequences 

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8 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

Hypothetical question. I was merely asking him what his options would be if it wasn't available, as if you didn't already know this. Why would you bother to reply this way when you know what I was saying? And buying sex within a marriage isn't irrelevant, but one of the reasons some marriages fail. Infidelity isn't a joke.

If you have some starry-eyed illusion marriage is not sex for money, dream on. Except for the most delusional, most women have a good provider at the top of their wish list.

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