38 minutes ago, save the frogs said:

I don't claim to have a Phd in psychology, but this forum is a useful learning tool.

I'm learning a lot about narcissism, deflection, unhealthy ego, projection, denial, sociopathy and childhood trauma.

Hell Yeah! The best of all. It´s Free!

My new address, Mr. .........., The Jungle, Laos. Let those jumped up jobsworths from the west find me now

On 7/10/2026 at 6:48 AM, scubascuba3 said:

A better decision would have been for people to build a house in Pattaya area, ar least you could sell it, in Isaan it's money down the drain

A better decision for who? Live in a gated community on 400 m² with neighbors? Or live upcountry on several rai with no neighbors? Build a decent home with land for less than 2 million—the equivalent of only five years’ rent in Pattaya—and be free to travel whenever you want?

You have your idea of freedom. I have mine. You live in a condo, right?

7 minutes ago, Hummin said:

A better decision for who? Live in a gated community on 400 m² with neighbors? Or live upcountry on several rai with no neighbors?

Whats the obsession with having no neighbors?

Do you hate people?

Are you a drummer in a metal band and play drums at 2 AM?

Just now, save the frogs said:

Whats the obsession with having no neighbors?

Do you hate people?

Are you a drummer in a metal band and play drums at 2 AM?

It’s called freedom for those who had the opportunity to grow up like that, know how to appreciate it, and use the opportunities it gives. We also got a return of 300k from the land. That covers our living costs in Isaan.

9 hours ago, Hummin said:

A better decision for who? Live in a gated community on 400 m² with neighbors? Or live upcountry on several rai with no neighbors? Build a decent home with land for less than 2 million—the equivalent of only five years’ rent in Pattaya—and be free to travel whenever you want?

You have your idea of freedom. I have mine. You live in a condo, right?

In nikonnowhere If the relationship didn't work out in most cases the house is unsellable so it just means you have less options, there's always abandonment i guess

10 hours ago, save the frogs said:

Whats the obsession with having no neighbors?

Do you hate people?

Are you a drummer in a metal band and play drums at 2 AM?

Less toxic people

The only issue with avoiding toxic people is you can't avoid yourself

Just now, Rockyroad said:

The only issue with avoiding toxic people is you can't avoid yourself

The jokes write themselves at some point. 

On 7/10/2026 at 11:20 AM, save the frogs said:

I'm surprised no one has started a thread making fun of sexpats in Pattaya in the last 72 hours.

The other thread about family members murdering each other over a property dispute in the boondocks got me thinking.

Pattaya is way better than any remote part of Thailand.

Sure, you get some thugs who behave badly -- but it's mostly in the bar scene or drug scene. You can avoid it.

But otherwise, the influx of so many expats in areas of Pattaya is raising the standards of Thailand. It's way better than "the real thailand".

The "real Thailand" is regression. If you move to these villages, you need to regress yourself to the mentality of villagers. Why would anyone want to do that when they come from a Western country?

I ain't ever moving to these villages. You'll have to shoot me dead first.

I don't want to regress. It's better if village Thais catch up to Western civilization than me forcing myself to regress to their hillbilly mentality out there.

I know first hand as I've been livinging in the boondocks in Korat for the past 2 months and I hate it. I'm only here because my wife is having her deceased mothers house totally renovated. When that's completed by the end of this month I'll be back to civilisation the same day. I own a house in Bangkok and a condo in Pattaya so I have no reason to live here. I've no intentions of ever returning here except for family functions such as funerals etc,

Pattaya - loads of toxic people

Nan - less toxic people

Toxic ratio Patts 50,000/1

Nan 100/1

In Patts you are small percent

In Nan 1%

So in quiet places your own toxicity becomes more obvious

So maybe the key to happiness is to live in Patts, that way you appear more normal as there are thousands of freaks that are worse than you

5 minutes ago, Rockyroad said:

Pattaya - loads of toxic people

Nan - less toxic people

Toxic ratio Patts 50,000/1

Nan 100/1

In Patts you are small percent

In Nan 1%

Could you please share your data for peer review?

53 minutes ago, temuFarang said:

Could you please share your data for peer review?

Think about it. Why do people avoid quiet spots? Cause they don't like themselves and hide amongst the crowd. Sheep hide amongst other sheep.

When someone struggles with self-acceptance, blending into a collective identity serves a few distinct psychological purposes:

• The Shield of Anonymity: Standing out invites scrutiny. If you feel inherently flawed, the spotlight feels less like recognition and more like an interrogation. Hiding in the crowd keeps the eyes off you.

• Borrowing an Identity: When an individual doesn't like who they are, it is often easier to adopt the flavor of the group. The crowd provides a pre-packaged set of opinions, behaviors, and values, saving them from the vulnerability of displaying their own.

On 7/10/2026 at 11:20 AM, save the frogs said:

I ain't ever moving to these villages. You'll have to shoot me dead first.

I don't want to regress. It's better if village Thais catch up to Western civilization than me forcing myself to regress to their hillbilly mentality out there.

I hate to break the news to you but it's usually kids from broken homes, failed marriages, academic poor performers, and the lazy boned looking for a quick and easy solution to their financial woes who leave the villages and end up in Pattaya. In short, you are dealing with the lost soul wash outs from the villages down in Pattaya, certainly not the cream of the crop, at any rate. The caliber of character you will find upcountry is generally higher than what you will find in Pattaya.

The suggestion that the average bar stool Johnny from the West offers a hand up, a quality introduction to Western culture, or a role model worthy of emulation for the lost souls who end up there would be laughable if it wasn't so disturbingly delusional.

15 minutes ago, Rockyroad said:

Think about it. Why do people avoid quiet spots? Cause they don't like themselves and hide amongst the crowd. Sheep hide amongst other sheep.

Quiet spots are ok for a few days.

I don't mix with toxic people so no issue in Pattaya or anywhere else

Edited July 13Jul 13 by scubascuba3

4 hours ago, scubascuba3 said:

In nikonnowhere If the relationship didn't work out in most cases the house is unsellable so it just means you have less options, there's always abandonment i guess

My house in the sticks is very modest; I don't think it would be an easy sell. But the nice ones that have gone up for sale that were built for foreigners, have sold quite quickly and at good prices, mostly to well-healed Thais. The last one, whose family decided to return to his home country for his daughter's education, made a nice profit.

Pattaya vs The Villages

Another false choice between living in Pattaya or the middle of nowhere. 😄

3 minutes ago, bunnydrops said:

My house in the sticks is very modest; I don't think it would be an easy sell. But the nice ones that have gone up for sale that were built for foreigners, have sold quite quickly and at good prices, mostly to well-healed Thais. The last one, whose family decided to return to his home country for his daughter's education, made a nice profit.

I'm reliably informed that less money about for Thais, banks aren't giving mortages and they have less cash = less buyers

1 hour ago, Rockyroad said:

When someone struggles with self-acceptance, blending into a collective identity serves a few distinct psychological purposes:

• The Shield of Anonymity: Standing out invites scrutiny. If you feel inherently flawed, the spotlight feels less like recognition and more like an interrogation. Hiding in the crowd keeps the eyes off you.

• Borrowing an Identity: When an individual doesn't like who they are, it is often easier to adopt the flavor of the group. The crowd provides a pre-packaged set of opinions, behaviors, and values, saving them from the vulnerability of displaying their own.

When you live in a small town, you get a reputation, whether good or bad, that is hard to escape or change. In the city, you can walk around the block and be a become different person.

On 7/10/2026 at 11:48 AM, scubascuba3 said:

A better decision would have been for people to build a house in Pattaya area, ar least you could sell it, in Isaan it's money down the drain

We sold 2 houses at Udon Thani, and both earned nice profit, especially the 2nd one, since having more land. and that was during the scamdemic.

I also don't find the cost of living much different, semi rural to semi rural area, Isan vs other areas. Actually thought Udon Thani was a bit more expensive than some other areas.

Edited July 13Jul 13 by KhunLA

6 minutes ago, scubascuba3 said:

I'm reliably informed that less money about for Thais, banks aren't giving mortages and they have less cash = less buyers

That may be true, but not all Thais are "most Thais".

On 7/10/2026 at 11:51 AM, KhunLA said:

I don't want to see, hear neighbors, or loudspeakers, or smell engine exhaust, and easily accomplished with minor thought & planning. Along with being less than 10 mins from a chain store for food. Makes everyday living so easy and comfortable.

That's me. Closest non-blood relative to the farm owners (they have houses all along the property) 450m down a private road to a council road.
No "morning news"blaring over tannoys hung from power poles and, except for election time, no blaring ads from cars.
This time of year, an increase in tractor noises for obvious reasons.
Seven minutes to the local morning and evening market (also a 7-eleven and a Mini big C) with 15 minutes's drive to a small Lotus, 20 minutes to a large one.

Although, as for the rest I went a tad too far. If I want to speak English face-to-face with another person, I'd have to drive to Khon Kaen four hours away. If I wanted to speak to someone I already know the closest is five hours away in Naklua.

But it is clean, quiet and comfortable. And with no sidewalks/pavements/footpaths at all it is safer than walking in Bangkok, Pattaya, Chiang Mai along those Achilles Tendon-threatening pathways.

42 minutes ago, bunnydrops said:

When you live in a small town, you get a reputation, whether good or bad, that is hard to escape or change. In the city, you can walk around the block and be a become different person.

My understanding is if you develop a bad reputation in the village, you will be forced to leave because the villagers will make your life difficult. It's all nepotism there to get anything done.

On 7/10/2026 at 12:55 PM, fredwiggy said:

Many move to a village because that's where their lady lives, as I did. Mine was a mistake, many others it isn't. If you come from the country or rural areas in your home country, you can adjust rather easily, as long as you can be yourself there. Leaving behind who you were before doesn't usually work, as you'll miss certain things. People who lived in cities or more so beach areas will blend into Pattaya or other beach places rather easily, as it's what they had before.

Thailand's country areas are very peaceful, but things like a land dispute usually won't affect a foreigner, as they'll never own land here. It does happen where a disturbed woman might hurt her foreign husband or vice-versa but it's pretty rare. It's mostly local against local, and it happens everywhere, although killing someone here does happen over very minor things. We only see a fraction of the craziness that happens here daily, just like in the west, although severe things are publicized more in the west.

If you're comfortable where you are, your life will be good. if not, you go where it is.

People dealing with criminals in the sticks; an example:

Some years ago, during The Plague, the police raided a house about 3km away, to arrest the inhabitant for dealing ice. The inhabitant - a man called "Oppchoi" and his friend managed to escape out the back of the house and ran into a neighbouring sugarcane field. They were said to be armed. The police went down all the surrounding breaks, lanes, and internal roads, on their motorbikes and pickups waiting for the men to appear.

In the mean time, top cop asks who owns the field. The gathered crowd, drawn by a swarm of cops cars and bikes made that ask pretty simple. Phones were out, giving the top cop contact information.
Ten minutes later the owner of the field , a man called "Poi" who knew Oppchoi as they were estranged friends, appeared on his tractor. A discussion with the topcop. Then Poi is driving down the side of the cane field, with liquid squirting onto the bordering cane stalks. Comes back. Says something to the policeman in charge.
And then sets fire to it.

Whoomp! 200-odd rai of ready-to-harvest sugarcane on fire out-of-permit.
Oppchoi and his mate were subsequently arrested after dark when, I assume, the smoke or fire got too close them.
Oppchoi is out of prison now after spending (I think) eighteen months.
And had to compensate Poi for the fuel he used. LOL

Source: Poi, the next evening over beers. Poi is my landlady's first cousin.

2 minutes ago, The Oracle said:

Source: Poi, the next evening over beers. Poi is my landlady's first cousin.

Yeah, sounds too incestuous out there.

21 minutes ago, save the frogs said:

Yeah, sounds too incestuous out there.

Tell me about it. I had a parcel delivered by Flash or Kerry whatver, COD. 89 baht. Thought the teenager had bought something. Anyway, the landlady (TLL) gets home from work and sees the package. Now. The surname is the same but the first name isn't any of her brothers or sisters. So she goes 200m (next door) to a sisters house, who is ???. No idea. Another sisterm 400m in another dircetion. No idea.
The next night having some sukiyaki and few beers I asked the assembled clan - about a dozen brothers, sisters, wives and husbands, "who is ????"
Apparently it is the eldest brother's daughters real name.
"Good she owes me 89 baht"

As you'd know, no one calls people by their birth name. This was one of TLL's own nieces and didn't know.
Classic.
(Obviously, my parcels are always delivered, using TLL's name and address but with baan farang in brackets under it in Thai script.) I'm the only one and anyoen within a mile knows where I live.

4 hours ago, Rams86 said:

I know first hand as I've been livinging in the boondocks in Korat for the past 2 months and I hate it. I'm only here because my wife is having her deceased mothers house totally renovated. When that's completed by the end of this month I'll be back to civilisation the same day. I own a house in Bangkok and a condo in Pattaya so I have no reason to live here. I've no intentions of ever returning here except for family functions such as funerals etc,

Where I'm staying at the moment is a 17 kms straight road that goes to highway 304. Guess what highway 304 goes straight past the front gate to my estate in Bangkok. So when her indoors drops the word we're out of here. When you compare the people who live in my large estate and the country people you would think that they come from different countries.

6 hours ago, scubascuba3 said:

In nikonnowhere If the relationship didn't work out in most cases the house is unsellable so it just means you have less options, there's always abandonment i guess

I do not live my life around "what ifs." I live my life around today, while still respecting what tomorrow might bring. That is why I have said many times on this forum: do not go all in with all your assets or cash.

I also see it as paying rent as time goes by. It is expensive the first few years while you establish yourself and build. Time is the key

7 hours ago, scubascuba3 said:

In nikonnowhere If the relationship didn't work out in most cases the house is unsellable so it just means you have less options, there's always abandonment i guess

A little intelligent planning solves that issue, called POA. Also why you only invest anywhere, what you can afford to lose.

I kicked the 1st Thai wife out, and sold the land/house, and she wasn't even at the land office when I did it

If you have to ask about relationships and RE investing, buying land and or house on a forum .... RENT or buy a condo in your name, because you are not ready for TH.

Edited July 13Jul 13 by KhunLA