Friday Jokes

The post office just released a stamp in the shape of a clitoris. Its not selling to well as only 3 percent of the male population know how to lick it properly!

It's the AFL Grand Final and a man makes his way to his seat right on the wing. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty.

He leans over and asks his neighbour if someone will be sitting there.

'No,' says the neighbour. 'The seat is empty.'

'This is incredible', said the man. 'Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the AFL Grand Final and not use it?'

The neighbour says, 'Well actually, the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first Grand Final we haven't been together since we got married in 1967.'

'Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. That's terrible. But couldn't you find someone else, a friend or relative, or even a neighbour to take the seat?'

The man shakes his head.

'No, they're all at the funeral.'