Gay Jokes - Let's Tell Some Funny Ones

[FranklyNoMore]

I recently posted a couple of jokes on another thread because a couple of members thought the topic was too serious so I tried to lighten it up a bit. Well they obviously didnt go down too well as they were removed. I thought they were funny but maybe they werent politically correct so I understand why they were removed and maybe if they were posted by another poster they might not have been. Im not sure if someone complained as no explanation was given.

To me Liberals and society in general are becoming way to serious. I used to laugh at Roy Chubby Brown and Bernard Manning, 2 British comedians, and what sexist, racist bigoted jokes they told but they were jokes. I think there is a difference when saying something as a joke but maybe im wrong and if you think such jokes are funny does that make you one of the same?

Is it ok to tell gay jokes or do you get offended?

[peter991]

The only gay jokes I have heard in the last couple of years have been so ultra-stereotypical that they are not funny. A joke is supposed to be funny. The ThaiVisa Jokes section is the first I read when I log on each day, before I glance through new posts in the Gay section and the General section. About one joke in 100 I find hilariously funny, 90 in 100 have been recycled, the other nine I find mildly amusing.

I know in this day and age we are all supposed to be politically correct - but the Jokes Section gets a fair bit of leeway from Moderators. If your posts were removed, it's my guess it's because somebody used the !REPORT button.

Peter

[PeaceBlondie]

It depends if the joke is homophobic in nature. Such as starting a thread asking if gays are too anal. Such as jokes that gaybashers enjoy much more than the gay people do. I can't go onto the Ladies Forum and make 'jokes' about raping women. I can't make stupid jokes about how worthless sporting events are in the Sports Forum.

I have a cute story about a gay Hispanic cross dressing friend of mine who took the public bus to a party, got off the bus two stops early, and had to walk very fast in high heels through the wrong neighborhood. It's true, but s/he was such a stereotypical drag queen that I don't like to perpetuate the image. I could tell the 'joke' I plan to tell in mixed company the next time a straight basher asks my opinion of (gay) anal intercourse, but it's totally nasty and offensive to say in mixed company, including public questions about how he does it to his wife or his mia noi.....

I enjoy gay humour among gay friends, but not in mixed company. Until we ban some more members, this forum is mixed company.

[mikethevigoman]

It depends if the joke is homophobic in nature. Such as starting a thread asking if gays are too anal. Such as jokes that gaybashers enjoy much more than the gay people do. I can't go onto the Ladies Forum and make 'jokes' about raping women. I can't make stupid jokes about how worthless sporting events are in the Sports Forum.

I have a cute story about a gay Hispanic cross dressing friend of mine who took the public bus to a party, got off the bus two stops early, and had to walk very fast in high heels through the wrong neighborhood. It's true, but s/he was such a stereotypical drag queen that I don't like to perpetuate the image. I could tell the 'joke' I plan to tell in mixed company the next time a straight basher asks my opinion of (gay) anal intercourse, but it's totally nasty and offensive to say in mixed company, including public questions about how he does it to his wife or his mia noi.....

I enjoy gay humour among gay friends, but not in mixed company. Until we ban some more members, this forum is mixed company.

I see it as a way of getting the "straight brigade " on board,.i find your comments biased and segradating a bit, i have no problems with gays and have /and do use some great gay jokes,i thought you lot were tougher skinned than that, !

[farang prince]

Why do we want the "straight brigade" on board? What have you brought to the party? When you are ready to bend over and grab your ankles and "take it like a man" then we can discuss just how "tough skinned" you are.

[Jingthing]

We are pretty anal, that's for sure.

[PeaceBlondie]

Gay humor....if you read the following and the condom fits, wear it.

You are not expected to laugh at jokes about people other than your father having sex with your mother. We don't laugh

at most of the straight men's jokes about gay sex because they weren't that funny, we had heard them many times before, or we recognize that they're meant as kindly as those jokes about your mother.

Did you hear the joke about the straight guy who was catching HIV from his mia noi? It's so funny! Then she tells him...... :D

[Naam]

We are pretty anal, that's for sure.

and that applies to some of us straights too

[Naam]

Why do we want the "straight brigade" on board? What have you brought to the party?

your statement/questions are not fair Prince has anybody ever demanded that gays are not allowed to participate in "straight parties" respectively to post in a thread in TV-Forum?

i agree with PeaceBlondie that the thread title is somehow insensitive. but does that justify the exclusion of posters "de couleur differente"? just my two Satangs.

[FranklyNoMore]

Well actually, I was asking gay and not straight members about gay jokes and laughing at ourselves.

As for using gays and anal in the title, well one or 2 members appear pretty anal at times and they are gay! So there you go, all cleared up.

Like PB said jokes told by gays about gays are generally funnier than jokes about gays told by straights.

Edited October 16, 2007 by FranklyNoMore

[farang prince]

Why do we want the "straight brigade" on board? What have you brought to the party?

your statement/questions are not fair Prince has anybody ever demanded that gays are not allowed to participate in "straight parties" respectively to post in a thread in TV-Forum?

i agree with PeaceBlondie that the thread title is somehow insensitive. but does that justify the exclusion of posters "de couleur differente"? just my two Satangs.

Dr. Naam, my comment was directed at MikeTheVigoMan, who had just sent a rather senseless post. I'm sorry if I offended you. I never would want to do that. Of course, I would welcome any and all ThaiVisa members to post in the Gay Forum. But just as in the straight rooms of the Forum, if someone says something stupid, they should expect a ferocious response. Certainly I would never expect a senseless post from someone as erudite as yourself.

[PeaceBlondie]

At the request of the OP, I'll change the title of the topic to something less anal and more sensitive.

I think Endure and I have made something clear: comments are welcome here, by straights, if those comments are supportive. Not merely tolerant or indifferent; supportive of gays and most of our various lifestyles. Not that any of us support all the lifestyles completely. I was properly chased out of the Sports Forum once when I interrupted a conversation about Muhammad Ali. I never was much of a jock or an athletic supporter, and they've heard that joke for years.

[mikethevigoman]

Why do we want the "straight brigade" on board? What have you brought to the party? When you are ready to bend over and grab your ankles and "take it like a man" then we can discuss just how "tough skinned" you are.

Well if thats what it takes im off !,.just wanted to tell some jokes, not take it up the gary !

[farang prince]

Why do we want the "straight brigade" on board? What have you brought to the party? When you are ready to bend over and grab your ankles and "take it like a man" then we can discuss just how "tough skinned" you are.

Well if thats what it takes im off !,.just wanted to tell some jokes, not take it up the gary !

[endure]

Why do we want the "straight brigade" on board? What have you brought to the party? When you are ready to bend over and grab your ankles and "take it like a man" then we can discuss just how "tough skinned" you are.

Well if thats what it takes im off !,.just wanted to tell some jokes, not take it up the gary !

[endure]

At the request of the OP, I'll change the title of the topic to something less anal and more sensitive.

I think Endure and I have made something clear: comments are welcome here, by straights, if those comments are supportive. Not merely tolerant or indifferent; supportive of gays and most of our various lifestyles. Not that any of us support all the lifestyles completely. I was properly chased out of the Sports Forum once when I interrupted a conversation about Muhammad Ali. I never was much of a jock or an athletic supporter, and they've heard that joke for years.

The best way to look at it is that the gay forum is like a real-life gay club. If you act in here the same way you would in a real gay club you'll be ok. If you start a ruckus the bouncers will kick you out. If you're uncomfortable at the thought of entering a gay club this ain't the place for you.

[suegha]

There was a gay man, a lesbian, a transgender, a Jew and a Pakistani in a pub having a drink and a laugh.

How's that for an example of integration in the community!

Sorry, the topic title says 'Let's tell some funny ones'. I'll get me coat!

[thaicurious]

why can't a lesbian diet and wear makeup at the same time?

.

.

.

because you can't eat jenny craig when you have mary kay on your face.

Edited October 18, 2007 by thaicurious

[stevenjm]

What do you call a gay man? A man-hole. no offence meant - just a joke.

[Scott]

Do you know the Greek Navy motto?

Don't leave your buddies behind.

(Apologies to anyone who is Greek)

[stevenjm]

Do you know the Greek Navy motto?

Don't leave your buddies behind.

(Apologies to anyone who is Greek)

And if they do leave their buddies behind they better go see the rear admiral so they can be re-arse-igned.

[FranklyNoMore]

Whats the diference between a gay guy and a freezer?Freezers dont fart when you pull the meat out.

New Gay Dinosaur found, named: My-ass-is-saurus

Lesbian Dinosaur found, named: Licks-alotta- pus

Did you hear about the gay midget?

He went up on a guy!.

Two Lesbian Frogs just finished having sex with each other when one turned to the other and said, See dear...We DO taste like chicken!

I once was on a plane where I was served by an obviously homosexual male flight attendant. At one point, he bounced over to where I was sitting and announced: The Captain has asked me to announce that he will be landing the big scary plane shortly, so if you could just put up your trays, that would be great.

I did as he had instructed but the woman sitting next to me did not. A few moments later, our flight attendant came back and said to her: Maam, perhaps you couldnt hear me over the big scary engine, but I asked you to please put up your tray so that the captain can land the plane. She still wouldnt comply.

Now he was getting angry and asked her again to put up the tray. She then calmly turned to him and said: In my country, I am called a princess. I take orders from no one.

Our flight attendant replied: Oh yeah? Well in MY country, Im called a Queen and I outrank you, bitch, so put the tray up!

[farang prince]

Whats the diference between a gay guy and a freezer?Freezers dont fart when you pull the meat out.

New Gay Dinosaur found, named: My-ass-is-saurus

Lesbian Dinosaur found, named: Licks-alotta- pus

Did you hear about the gay midget?

He went up on a guy!.

Two Lesbian Frogs just finished having sex with each other when one turned to the other and said, See dear...We DO taste like chicken!

I once was on a plane where I was served by an obviously homosexual male flight attendant. At one point, he bounced over to where I was sitting and announced: The Captain has asked me to announce that he will be landing the big scary plane shortly, so if you could just put up your trays, that would be great.

I did as he had instructed but the woman sitting next to me did not. A few moments later, our flight attendant came back and said to her: Maam, perhaps you couldnt hear me over the big scary engine, but I asked you to please put up your tray so that the captain can land the plane. She still wouldnt comply.

Now he was getting angry and asked her again to put up the tray. She then calmly turned to him and said: In my country, I am called a princess. I take orders from no one.

Our flight attendant replied: Oh yeah? Well in MY country, Im called a Queen and I outrank you, bitch, so put the tray up!

Gee, I wish I had a drum and cybals to bang after each one of those oldies. But I did like the last one.

Edited October 18, 2007 by farang prince

[geriatrickid]

Why do we want the "straight brigade" on board? What have you brought to the party? When you are ready to bend over and grab your ankles and "take it like a man" then we can discuss just how "tough skinned" you are.

Jeez. If I made a comment like that to a few of my friends but instead of using str8 said bent, I'd be hanging from a door knob by my undies. And what's with the grabbing of the ankles? An unfair challenge. Walk into any farang patronised bar here, gay or otherwise and point out 10 farangs who can grab their ankles. Cripes, you'd be hardpressed to find the 1 guy without an obstructive belly who could do that without putting his back out.

Know what a joke is? When someone tells his partner to put it in, and the guy replies, hey, it's already in.

Yea I know, i know, there's a wedgie waiting for me in CM.

[PeaceBlondie]

That's all right, kid, I don't do wedgies.

[Naam]

Dr. Naam, my comment was directed at MikeTheVigoMan, who had just sent a rather senseless post. I'm sorry if I offended you.

you didn't offend me Prince. i was only asking for "equal rights"... sort of... kinda...

[FranklyNoMore]

Gee, I wish I had a drum and cybals to bang after each one of those oldies. But I did like the last one.

Well my bf laughed and thats good enough for me. Maybe this one is better for you.

After a long night of making love, this guy rolls over, looks and notices a framed picture of another man on the nightstand by the bed. Naturally, the guy begins to worry.

Is this your husband? he inquires nervously.

No, silly.\" she replies, snuggling up to him.

Your boyfriend then? he asks.

No, not at all, she whispers, nibbling away at his ear.

Is it your dad or your brother? he asks, hoping to be reassured.

No, no, no!!! she says.

Well who is he then? demands the bewildered guy.

Calmly the girl replies, That\'s me before the surgery.

[farang prince]

Gee, I wish I had a drum and cybals to bang after each one of those oldies. But I did like the last one.

Well my bf laughed and thats good enough for me. Maybe this one is better for you.

After a long night of making love, this guy rolls over, looks and notices a framed picture of another man on the nightstand by the bed. Naturally, the guy begins to worry.

Is this your husband? he inquires nervously.

No, silly.\" she replies, snuggling up to him.

Your boyfriend then? he asks.

No, not at all, she whispers, nibbling away at his ear.

Is it your dad or your brother? he asks, hoping to be reassured.

No, no, no!!! she says.

Well who is he then? demands the bewildered guy.

Calmly the girl replies, That\'s me before the surgery.

Hehehe. You got a smile out of my ladyboy.

[AlexLah]

I posted this before in the joke section but anyway here it goes.

Young guy comes home and tells his dad he had his first sex experience.

Dad tells his son to sit down and have a beer and tell everything.

Can I stay standing the son ask......

[kek]

I went to a lesbian wedding reception the other day.

I didn`t eat anything as it was a finger buffet...