Am I Becoming Gay?

[SpacemanSpliff]

Ok I know how this looks, please cut me some slack.

I am happily married, I enjoy the bars in Thailand; those with girls. This has always been loads of fun, but the excitement is kind of gone. For some reason it's not as exciting as it used to be. Girls in general are not as exciting as they used to be.

Some bars also have ladyboys around. I'm beginning to feel they ARE exciting, or different, at least.

The thought of waking up next to one still horrifies me, and the thought of being in a relationship with one is just unthinkable, even if I wasn't happily married.

Is it possible for people to turn gay, or does one have to be born that way?

I'm sorry if this isn't the right forum, but it was either this one or nothing.

[ProThaiExpat]

Name your favorite dish of all time, mine is steak. Eat steak every night, sure, but its your guess how quickly you will get tired of it. Experimentation only suggests an adventurous nature.

Experiment as you will, as long as you don't harm others while doing so, no harm done. While homosexual behavior can be experienced by heterosexuals, and can even be a substitute for their straight sexual orientation, example, men in prison. However, once heterosexual outlets are available upon being released, the vast majority of "temporary gay acting prison males" revert to straight sex.

Most gays who were "straight" for many years with families and reasonably happy with such a lifestyle and who later "came out" to exclusive homosexual behavior, will usually say they were gay all the time, they just were repressed by society or other factors during their "straight years". Yes, as they came out, it was often "scary".

Experiment and be adventurous in your sexual behavior and where ever you end up, it will be the result of fully living life and experiencing all it has to offer. Forget labels, they are only the crutch of insecure people.

Edited December 20, 2007 by ProThaiExpat

[Jingthing]

Most gay men are not attracted in the slightest to ladyboys, especially those in full lady drag. Gay men like males, not females. You are not turning gay.

Labels are labels are sometimes they are straightjackets, but when I see a straight man in a relationship with a katoey, I see a heterosexual couple.

Next ...

Edited December 20, 2007 by Jingthing

[Gary A]

Most gay men are not attracted in the slightest to ladyboys, especially those in full lady drag. Gay men like males, not females. You are not turning gay.

Labels are labels are sometimes they are straightjackets, but when I see a straight man in a relationship with a katoey, I see a heterosexual couple.

Next ...

I have a good friend who is gay. He has helped me get over my touch of homophobia. My question is that he always appears to be attracted to only lady boys. Is he doing this for my benefit or does he actually prefer them? I have never seen him with another man. He openly admits to being gay and to being turned off by women.

[lannarebirth]

I doubt if the OP is becoming gay, but he probably thinks about sex more than is healthy for a well balanced life.

[Jingthing]

Most gay men are not attracted in the slightest to ladyboys, especially those in full lady drag. Gay men like males, not females. You are not turning gay.

Labels are labels are sometimes they are straightjackets, but when I see a straight man in a relationship with a katoey, I see a heterosexual couple.

Next ...

I have a good friend who is gay. He has helped me get over my touch of homophobia. My question is that he always appears to be attracted to only lady boys. Is he doing this for my benefit or does he actually prefer them? I have never seen him with another man. He openly admits to being gay and to being turned off by women.

I said most. I don't know your friend but he sounds like a bit of freak, and isn't diversity a wonderful thing?

[Jingthing]

I doubt if the OP is becoming gay, but he probably thinks about sex more than is healthy for a well balanced life.

I beg to differ. It is normal for all men to think about sex all the time.

[mikethevigoman]

Most gay men are not attracted in the slightest to ladyboys, especially those in full lady drag. Gay men like males, not females. You are not turning gay.

Labels are labels are sometimes they are straightjackets, but when I see a straight man in a relationship with a katoey, I see a heterosexual couple.

Next ...

im also married and i have never fancied a man, however i do tend to look at the katoeys in jenny and wonder,..but as for trying one, nah,. i like the girls thanks,.

[Jingthing]

They truly are WOMEN of the second kind, the dears.

[mikethevigoman]

They truly are WOMEN of the second kind, the dears.

whenever i see an overly feminie ,beautiful woman in walking st, it always turns out to be a geezer !

[OlRedEyes]

You're bored.

[Jingthing]

It is nice to have something to grab onto while you're ...

[mikethevigoman]

It is nice to have something to grab onto while you're ...

sorry you missed the end off your sentence ! ,.. could be anther 3 word story line

[SpacemanSpliff]

Thanks everyone for the helpful replies..! I was a bit worried it'd just end in ridicule but I truly appreciate all comments.

Indeed gay friends always tell me they're not in the least attracted to ladyboys, but there's got to be a gray area somewhere..

How about bi-sexual people actually.. Would they be likely to be into kathoeys in addition to women & men?

[Jingthing]

How about bi-sexual people actually.. Would they be likely to be into kathoeys in addition to women & men?

Yes, more likely than "dedicated" gay men.

[farang prince]

Thanks everyone for the helpful replies..! I was a bit worried it'd just end in ridicule but I truly appreciate all comments.

Indeed gay friends always tell me they're not in the least attracted to ladyboys, but there's got to be a gray area somewhere..

How about bi-sexual people actually.. Would they be likely to be into kathoeys in addition to women & men?

Spaceman, I'm bisexual and I have been in a five-year relationship with a Thai ladyboy (incidentally, most Thai ladyboys resent being called katoeys because it is considered a slur). Gay men are not attracted to transsexuals because even though though TS's have a man's equipment they have a woman's packaging. In truth, most partners of Thai ladyboys are straight men. That's what ladyboys prefer...especially very masculine males who reinforce their feelings of femininity.

Many adolescent men started out their sexual lives being involved in sex play with other boys. That's how they learn about their own bodies. As some point in their early 'teens, they usually will "discover" women and often stay in heterosexual relationships the rest of their lives. In my case, I was introduced to sex by a male friend, then went almost 40 years in heterosexual relationships, only to discover my bi side much later in life. Today I'm very happy in the decisions I've made. My advice for you is to stop worrying about the complexities of life. Usually things will work out for a reason.

Edited December 20, 2007 by farang prince

[arco27]

why do we always have to put lables on sexual behaviour (and everything else as well)?

If it feels right do it, if not, leave it to the ones that want to do it. I probably would be labeled 100% gay, which would never stop me to sleep with a woman or maybe ladyboy if I truely fancied them. Sex is fun, so never deprive yoursefs of new experiances.

[peter991]

why do we always have to put lables on sexual behaviour (and everything else as well)?

That is definitely one of the Quotes of the Year.

That is definitely not how I see life in Thailand. Perhaps it is the way we are brought up / educated in Farangland. While Thai guys in general are quite shy (bar workers excluded), sexuality is never a problem.

Talk to Thai guys and many will tell you they 'like lady' - but most will willingly have gay sex without a second thought.

Peter

[AlexLah]

Ok I know how this looks, please cut me some slack.

I am happily married, I enjoy the bars in Thailand; those with girls. This has always been loads of fun, but the excitement is kind of gone. For some reason it's not as exciting as it used to be. Girls in general are not as exciting as they used to be.

Can you explain what is so exciting about it or what excited you before?

Some bars also have ladyboys around. I'm beginning to feel they ARE exciting, or different, at least.

Yep they are a bit different (more sensitive) and some do have interesting story's to tell if you know them a bit better.

The thought of waking up next to one still horrifies me, and the thought of being in a relationship with one is just unthinkable, even if I wasn't happily married.

There are short time hotels nowadays so you can 'experiment' ha ha.

Is it possible for people to turn gay, or does one have to be born that way?

I'm sorry if this isn't the right forum, but it was either this one or nothing.

OP, there are lots of people that have there first try with a TG, post or pre op, just go to some LB bar and see for yourself.

Nothing wrong with trying something different, just use a condom and play safe at all times.

Enjoy life!

Alie

[Rionoir]

there's got to be a gray area somewhere..

Of course there is... very few people are 100% gay or straight... I am attracted to some Thai women all the time, but not enough to make me ever wanna go home with one... but enough to make me look twice at them, check out their legs... whatever. Same with katoy... I don't really go that way, but when I see them I sometimes just think... "Hmm... I wonder if she's a screamer..." lol

Sex is sex... you're not gay. But if you ever wanna try...

[pointofview]

Ok I know how this looks, please cut me some slack.

I am happily married, I enjoy the bars in Thailand; those with girls. This has always been loads of fun, but the excitement is kind of gone. For some reason it's not as exciting as it used to be. Girls in general are not as exciting as they used to be.

Some bars also have ladyboys around. I'm beginning to feel they ARE exciting, or different, at least.

The thought of waking up next to one still horrifies me, and the thought of being in a relationship with one is just unthinkable, even if I wasn't happily married.

Is it possible for people to turn gay, or does one have to be born that way?

I'm sorry if this isn't the right forum, but it was either this one or nothing.

There are a lot of people who dont consider themselfs gay - but they dont mind helping them out when they are busy

[expatwannabe]

Sexuality is not such a black and white thing. You might be attracted to katoeys, you might not.

Does it really hurt anyone if you are?

[Onnutrd]

why do we always have to put lables on sexual behaviour (and everything else as well)?

If it feels right do it, if not, leave it to the ones that want to do it. I probably would be labeled 100% gay, which would never stop me to sleep with a woman or maybe ladyboy if I truely fancied them. Sex is fun, so never deprive yoursefs of new experiances.

"Sex is fun, so never deprive yoursefs of new experiances."

That is entirely dependent on which end of the stick you're on.