Marriage

[IamMaiC]

My parent's been together 30 years Thai and farang marriage I hope I make it that long only 2 yrs for me It's been great so far and I love her with all my heart

[Coffee Dude]

I've been married 3 times before so I may not be a poster with a positive historical draw.

I have been exlusive with my TG now for a little longer than I have lived here (26 Months). I met her while on Holiday and we are quite happy together after this time (which is more than I can say for my other marriages).

All marriages are difficult anywhere. I have always heard that when the bills come in the front door love goes out the window. Historically, money, or lack of it, has been the biggest contributor to the problems of my previous marriages (except my second wife who was actually the daughter of Satan). I would think that this would be no different here. Last year in June (SARS and all of that stuff) I had to go to a loan shark to pay our rent (this means I didn't have ANY money). Guess what...she didn't leave. She stayed (against all apparent indicators) and worked harder than ever to build our business into a profitable position, which was accomplished.

I guess my point is; You can't make book on a thing like this. Maybe if you bet on all of the marriages you could go with the stats but in this race you can't pick one horse and beat the odds with any consistancy.

BTW my TG is and X BG and younger than my oldest son.

Coffee!!!

[Darlek]

Marriage to Thai lady does it last.

Any statistics on how long Falong Thai marriage lasts.

What is the significance of a Buddha wedding to Thaïs?

Should they be a poll on this?

Your honest comments appreciated.

No the majority end in complete disaster , due to poor communications ,her insatiable unreasonable demands for cash and the fact they are poorly matched .

BGs and non BGs they are all just as bad

take her out of the country back home and things get much worse as her options are increased .

[IamMaiC]

Marriage to Thai lady does it last.

Any statistics on how long Falong Thai marriage lasts.

What is the significance of a Buddha wedding to Thaïs?

Should they be a poll on this?

Your honest comments appreciated.

No the majority end in complete disaster , due to poor communications ,her insatiable unreasonable demands for cash and the fact they are poorly matched .

BGs and non BGs they are all just as bad

take her out of the country back home and things get much worse as her options are increased .

You are wrong darlek many of my mom's friends married farangs and they are still together. I live in florida and we have a large thai community around us even two wats and a big majority of the thai women are married to farang husbands it depends on the two parties involved. Some of these people been married 10, 20 years already.

You need to stay out of the bars and also need a break from thailand you have a bad opinion of it.

[ThaiPauly]

I've been married 3 times before so I may not be a poster with a positive historical draw. 

BTW my TG is and X BG and younger than my oldest son.

Coffee!!!

we have a lot in common, same number of marriages and near enough the same circumstances, (except I do not have a business here) it proves that marriage to an ex-BG CAN work, like everything you cannot take any marriage for granted, but if its the REAL DEAL then BG or not IT WORKS

I suppose the anti-BG brigade will say we are lucky!!! and not typical of the majority of Thai -Farang marriages which MUST go the wall because they could not POSSIBLY think one could work.

[IamMaiC]

it can work if the two people in the marriage make it work where ever you are from the world it's the same thing. I know bargirls cannot do that job forever and they if smart enough need to think of the future so they meet a farang great for them even if the man is thai if it works then so be it

[ghengis]

How long does a Thai-farang marriage last? Are there any statistics?

In the UK around 50% of marriages fail, but nearly half of couple living together choose not to marry. Of the half that don't get married only 5% are together after 10 years.

If a man wants to live with a Thai lady in the UK, he is forced to get married to her in order to get a settlement visa. Men often meet a Thai lady on holiday, and after a few short trips to Thailand they decide to live together in the UK. Many of these couples have only lived together for a few short months before they make a committment to marry. If this was a farang-farang marriage, the decision to marry may be put off for a few years, and possibly indefinitely.

So comparing marriage success if Thai-farang marriages with farang-farang marriages may be a little misleading. If you make the assertion that both types of relationships had similar characteristics, you would expect the Thai-farang marriage failure rate to be higher because this group contains a lot more 'immature relationships'.

Also, many Thai-farang relationships seem to be between couples with large disparity of age, education and wealth. In other words, Thai-farang couples are often between couples with less compatibility than you would expect in the west.

Anacdotal Evidence does seem to suggest that Thai-farang marrages have a higher failure rate than farang-farang marriages - maybe 2/3 of marriages fail. However, if you take into consideration the length of the relationship before marriage and basic compatibility issues you may well find that Thai-farang marriages are more stable than their equivalent western counterpart for the following reasons:

1. Thai women are loyal and respect their husbands more than western women
   
2. Family is very strong in Thai culture
   
3. Thai women appreciate the support given by their husbands whereas western women take it for granted
   

In summary - raw statistics may give a misleading impression. If you find the right Thai lady, your chances of a successful marriage are very good.

[davethailand]

Marriage to Thai lady does it last.

Any statistics on how long Falong Thai marriage lasts.

What is the significance of a Buddha wedding to Thaïs?

Should they be a poll on this?

Your honest comments appreciated.

No the majority end in complete disaster , due to poor communications ,her insatiable unreasonable demands for cash and the fact they are poorly matched .

BGs and non BGs they are all just as bad

take her out of the country back home and things get much worse as her options are increased .

You are wrong darlek many of my mom's friends married farangs and they are still together. I live in florida and we have a large thai community around us even two wats and a big majority of the thai women are married to farang husbands it depends on the two parties involved. Some of these people been married 10, 20 years already.

You need to stay out of the bars and also need a break from thailand you have a bad opinion of it.

Here Here IamMaiC,

Darlek, how can you be in a position come out with a comment like this?

(unless you've been stung before of course)

[IamMaiC]

Marriage to Thai lady does it last.

Any statistics on how long Falong Thai marriage lasts.

What is the significance of a Buddha wedding to Thaïs?

Should they be a poll on this?

Your honest comments appreciated.

No the majority end in complete disaster , due to poor communications ,her insatiable unreasonable demands for cash and the fact they are poorly matched .

BGs and non BGs they are all just as bad

take her out of the country back home and things get much worse as her options are increased .

You are wrong darlek many of my mom's friends married farangs and they are still together. I live in florida and we have a large thai community around us even two wats and a big majority of the thai women are married to farang husbands it depends on the two parties involved. Some of these people been married 10, 20 years already.

You need to stay out of the bars and also need a break from thailand you have a bad opinion of it.

Here Here IamMaiC,

Darlek, how can you be in a position come out with a comment like this?

(unless you've been stung before of course)

He got stung alright they broke the stinger off while it was still stuck in him What I have experience the Farang and Thai marriage I am also saying the ones being the man that is thai also What I have seen is that the parties involved are very happy even years into the marriage My dad is Farang My Mom Thai I think I am a better person because i was exposed to two different cultures both have the good side and the bad sides to them. My parent's have their rough times every marriage will now and then but in the long run they are still together.

Now I am married to a Thai woman and she makes me so happy We just get along very well and what surprises me so far is no arguing about little things and that also makes me a calmer person for it. I had Farang GF's before and it was just pure ###### after a while some days with them it was like i wanted to rip my head off so I decided to try something else for a change. I am happier now much happier Also I am not saying that every Farang Thai relationship lasts or it is the best thing for the Man or the Woman.

I live in the states and what i have seen makes me proud that Thai people and Farang people can get along even if they don't see things eye to eye.

[IamMaiC]

How long does a Thai-farang marriage last? Are there any statistics?

In the UK around 50% of marriages fail, but nearly half of couple living together choose not to marry. Of the half that don't get married only 5% are together after 10 years.

If a man wants to live with a Thai lady in the UK, he is forced to get married to her in order to get a settlement visa. Men often meet a Thai lady on holiday, and after a few short trips to Thailand they decide to live together in the UK. Many of these couples have only lived together for a few short months before they make a committment to marry. If this was a farang-farang marriage, the decision to marry may be put off for a few years, and possibly indefinitely.

So comparing marriage success if Thai-farang marriages with farang-farang marriages may be a little misleading. If you make the assertion that both types of relationships had similar characteristics, you would expect the Thai-farang marriage failure rate to be higher because this group contains a lot more 'immature relationships'.

Also, many Thai-farang relationships seem to be between couples with large disparity of age, education and wealth. In other words, Thai-farang couples are often between couples with less compatibility than you would expect in the west.

Anacdotal Evidence does seem to suggest that Thai-farang marrages have a higher failure rate than farang-farang marriages - maybe 2/3 of marriages fail. However, if you take into consideration the length of the relationship before marriage and basic compatibility issues you may well find that Thai-farang marriages are more stable than their equivalent western counterpart for the following reasons:

1. Thai women are loyal and respect their husbands more than western women
   
2. Family is very strong in Thai culture
   
3. Thai women appreciate the support given by their husbands whereas western women take it for granted
   

In summary - raw statistics may give a misleading impression. If you find the right Thai lady, your chances of a successful marriage are very good.

The Thing is How can you have a marriage last after only knowing each other a few months?? Even a Farang marriage. I'm sure some have, The thing with thai women that i have seen in my mom is family comes first always to her.

last time i was in Thailand I wanted to cook for my wife and she say no you guest I cook for you. I didn't want to hurt her feelings So I sat down she was great to me also her family. And her friends also They showed me around udon thani like i never seen it before.

Yes if you meet the right lady it helps very much also if you meet the right Thai man If any ladies are here on this thread Like I said before Man and Woman make the marriage work. No One else.

[sonthaya]

Marriage to Thai lady does it last.

Any statistics on how long Falong Thai marriage lasts.

What is the significance of a Buddha wedding to Thaïs?

Should they be a poll on this?

Your honest comments appreciated.

No the majority end in complete disaster , due to poor communications ,her insatiable unreasonable demands for cash and the fact they are poorly matched .

BGs and non BGs they are all just as bad

take her out of the country back home and things get much worse as her options are increased .

You are wrong, I have been happily married to an EX BG for 12 years now, we live in Denmark, and most of our friends are Danish /Thai, and it works fine, most have been married for a number of years.

[Coffee Dude]

Tiger's family did ok.

Coffee!!!

[Storekeeper]

No facts just fluff...but I intuitively believe 80-90 % of farangs who marry Thai girls in fact marry bg's, freelancers whatever you want to call them. And yes, I am one of them. I'm not in denial and had no preference based on profession. I married the 131st one I found who I knew I could trust. So what ? She's tighter than the farmer's virgin daughter and doesn't need any schoolin'. Again, so what ?

[The Gentleman Scamp]

Haven't got time to read all this - it's 2 baht a minute in this place!!!!

Anyway, somewhere on my 'I've finally found her' thread, I think it was Mouse that said something about having children and that it tends to 'cement' a relationship.

That said, marraige should cement a relationship and I would assume that with a Thai it would more than it would a farang girl in farangland where the value of marraige has decayed and is virtually dead at the bottom of a filthy ditch.

I would marry a Thai, I would also marry an ex BG, weather or not I am currently co-habiting with my future wife remains to be seen.

[IamMaiC]

No facts just fluff...but I intuitively believe 80-90 % of farangs who marry Thai girls in fact marry bg's, freelancers whatever you want to call them. And yes, I am one of them. I'm not in denial and had no preference based on profession. I married the 131st one I found who I knew I could trust. So what ? She's tighter than the farmer's virgin daughter and doesn't need any schoolin'. Again, so what ?

Storekeeper are you sure about this percentage??

[stevehaigh]

ever wonder if this "my TG is better than your TG because she's not a BG" thing us getting out of hand?

maybe we need to settle this in the time honored british way, a drinking match! two teams, one with TGs who are/were bar girls and the other team with "regular" girls.

may the best drunkards win! i'd vote for the team with the BG girlfriends (my team BTW) because clearly, no strangers to bars and booze!

[Bizz]

I have let the comments flow in now it is time to comment.

I guess I have been lucky so far, my girl friend is not and never has been a bargirl. This I am sure.

After Harry’s comments, I knew it would drift this way.

My father god nest him said to me the day I got married in 1977 that the only advice I can give you and it is only a few short words is

“LEARN TO LISTEN AND SAY NOTTING”

.

This remark refers to the partner woman in relationship.

It takes two to make a relationship work.

For all the comments thank you all and keep them coming, that includes you Harry as I am not a person to hold on to the past. I live for today and tomorrow will always come.

Thai women are loyal and respect their husbands more than western women

Family is very strong in Thai culture

Thai women appreciate the support given by their husbands whereas western women take it for granted.

[Bizz]

Thai women are loyal and respect their husbands more than western women

Family is very strong in Thai culture

Thai women appreciate the support given by their husbands whereas western women take it for granted.

This comment was posted by qhengis

[IamMaiC]

“LEARN TO LISTEN AND SAY NOTTING”

Thai women are loyal and respect their husbands more than western women

Family is very strong in Thai culture

Thai women appreciate the support given by their husbands whereas western women take it for granted.

This is why many marriages fail There is a time to talk and a time to listen There is also patience and trying to not lose your temper in a disagreement That was my problem with my former GF's

When I met my wife there is a calmness to Thai's "Mai Pen Rai" Attitude?? I guess spending time with my wife it rubbed off on me, I had a short fuse before let little things bother me Simple things that a little time and effort could fix.

Now I am alot calmer and don't let little things bother me as much as i use to

I can see my wife is very loyal and I am blessed for that I am a Loyal man also Dont' like the games of playing around on someone. Like the old addage "Treat others just as you would like to be Treated"

[Mr Red]

“LEARN TO LISTEN AND SAY NOTTING”

Thai women are loyal and respect their husbands more than western women

Family is very strong in Thai culture

Thai women appreciate the support given by their husbands whereas western women take it for granted.

This is why many marriages fail There is a time to talk and a time to listen There is also patience and trying to not lose your temper in a disagreement That was my problem with my former GF's

When I met my wife there is a calmness to Thai's "Mai Pen Rai" Attitude?? I guess spending time with my wife it rubbed off on me, I had a short fuse before let little things bother me Simple things that a little time and effort could fix.

Now I am alot calmer and don't let little things bother me as much as i use to

I can see my wife is very loyal and I am blessed for that I am a Loyal man also Dont' like the games of paying around on someone. Like the old addage "Treat others just as you would like to be Treated"

Lot of wisdom in your post, IamMaiC ...

Marriage is all about partnership and trust. My wonderful wife and I have worked that out over 34 years and look forward to many more, including a retirement in Thailand. I so look forward to giving her the opportunity to live among her family and in her country after she followed me all over the world and bore me two wonderful kids. I owe her something after all that sacrifice on her part.

BTW -- this was first marriage for both of us and it really took!

[usatrader]

Met my lady in college as undergraduates in the States 26 years ago. I Married her and one my best friends married her Thai room mate 3 months later. Its now 25 years for them.

We also have a college Grad school friend from Saudi who married a lovely Thai lady he met when he attended Harvard Grad school some 21 years ago as well.

We are all still happily married to our Thai ladies.

Best ###### thing this old fart could have ever done I assure you.

[Bizz]

Learn to listen and say noting

Would like to hear from a woman’s point of view as I have been told most women like to be heard at times and for a man to listen.

Yes communication is important very important for a relationship to survive but I also believe a woman likes to talk and does not want you to make a comment or try to tell her what to do but to listen just to listen

[Storekeeper]

No facts just fluff...but I intuitively believe 80-90 % of farangs who marry Thai girls in fact marry bg's, freelancers whatever you want to call them. And yes, I am one of them. I'm not in denial and had no preference based on profession. I married the 131st one I found who I knew I could trust. So what ? She's tighter than the farmer's virgin daughter and doesn't need any schoolin'. Again, so what ?       

Storekeeper are you sure about this percentage??

Heck no

[IamMaiC]

No facts just fluff...but I intuitively believe 80-90 % of farangs who marry Thai girls in fact marry bg's, freelancers whatever you want to call them. And yes, I am one of them. I'm not in denial and had no preference based on profession. I married the 131st one I found who I knew I could trust. So what ? She's tighter than the farmer's virgin daughter and doesn't need any schoolin'. Again, so what ?       

Storekeeper are you sure about this percentage??

Heck no

Then why say it?? if your not sure

[IamMaiC]

“LEARN TO LISTEN AND SAY NOTTING”

Thai women are loyal and respect their husbands more than western women

Family is very strong in Thai culture

Thai women appreciate the support given by their husbands whereas western women take it for granted.

This is why many marriages fail There is a time to talk and a time to listen There is also patience and trying to not lose your temper in a disagreement That was my problem with my former GF's

When I met my wife there is a calmness to Thai's "Mai Pen Rai" Attitude?? I guess spending time with my wife it rubbed off on me, I had a short fuse before let little things bother me Simple things that a little time and effort could fix.

Now I am alot calmer and don't let little things bother me as much as i use to

I can see my wife is very loyal and I am blessed for that I am a Loyal man also Dont' like the games of paying around on someone. Like the old addage "Treat others just as you would like to be Treated"

Lot of wisdom in your post, IamMaiC ...

Marriage is all about partnership and trust. My wonderful wife and I have worked that out over 34 years and look forward to many more, including a retirement in Thailand. I so look forward to giving her the opportunity to live among her family and in her country after she followed me all over the world and bore me two wonderful kids. I owe her something after all that sacrifice on her part.

BTW -- this was first marriage for both of us and it really took!

I have seen my parent's 30 yr marriage have it's up's and down's I seen my dad do the things a father should not do. I learned from that and I will try not to do the same. I saw them argue countless times and about the same thing pretty much. I don't think I could yell at my wife like that.

She does not seem the type to want to argue so that is also another calming factor for me. I know Marriage is not perfect and it will have tests along the way It is how you handle those times that makes the marriage work.

I look forward to having children, I would like a little girl believe it or not Usually stereotypes say men want to have a boy. I guess I do but not at first I just want the baby to be healthy if it is a boy or a girl also my wife to be safe during that time.

BTW- This is my first marriage also maybe i will be as lucky as you are Mr. Red.