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How Did You Meet Your Gay Partner


cm-happy

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Thought this would be an interesting topic.

I'll start off.

5 years ago this coming April, went to Coco Banana(now closed) next to Circle pub in Chiang mai. Nice quiet indoor atmosphere and had air conditioning. It was very hot that time of year.

At the time was a farang guy there celebrating his birthday, WE BOTH SHARED THE SAME FIRST NAME.

So I walked in sat down and ordered a beer. Heard this handsome Thai guy calling my name. I did not recognize him so invited him over to have a drink with me to see if I really did know him but had forgotten. As it turns out he did not know me from Adam. Had a nice time chatting with him. Said he was hungry(arn't they always) so I asked him if he'd like to go to Mai Pang.

So off we go, had a nice meal and a few drinks chatting some more, laughing and talking about the off duty bar boys that used to hang out there after hours.

Invited home home with me, he accepted. Had a wonderful night together. HE NEVER LEFT! we're still happily together. Love has grown and cannot imagine life without him.

So to sum things up, I met my partner accidentally, kismet, fate, destiny, dumb luck.

Any one else care to share?

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As it turns out he did not know me from Adam

Careful! That could be taken to mean he used to work at Adams Apple :D

Not that that's a problem. How did I meet my BF? Easy he was number 66 :o (or was it 63, my memory's hazy, must have drunk too much, and it was only last night :D )

And sliding quickly off topic........ has anyone been to Mai Peang recently? It used to be a regular haunt a couple of years ago, but I haven't been for ages, mainly because no one else from our gang seems to go either. It was getting a bad reputation for fights which doesn't help. Any reports?

And staying off topic, has anyone been to Nakaraj (Spelling) in Chiang Mai. Its a Spa type place somewhere between the railway station and big C, allegedly owned by the same people as Circle Pub. Someone I know works there and says good things (but they would). Too far to go and investigate without more information.

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As it turns out he did not know me from Adam

Careful! That could be taken to mean he used to work at Adams Apple :D

Not that that's a problem. How did I meet my BF? Easy he was number 66 :o (or was it 63, my memory's hazy, must have drunk too much, and it was only last night :D )

And sliding quickly off topic........ has anyone been to Mai Peang recently? It used to be a regular haunt a couple of years ago, but I haven't been for ages, mainly because no one else from our gang seems to go either. It was getting a bad reputation for fights which doesn't help. Any reports?

And staying off topic, has anyone been to Nakaraj (Spelling) in Chiang Mai. Its a Spa type place somewhere between the railway station and big C, allegedly owned by the same people as Circle Pub. Someone I know works there and says good things (but they would). Too far to go and investigate without more information.

Your point about Apple is well taken. Its just an expression meaning he did not know me or had ever seen me.

so for all the others out there, NO, he has NEVER worked at Apple nor did I recognize him from Apple performers.

I hav'nt been to mai Pang either in several years. It used to fun to go there and fool around with the off duty bar boys.

You're right about the fights.

Lsst time I was there seems its now turned into an after hours place for lady boys. But still can get a drink after hours.

Edited by cm-happy
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Back on topic, met my long term Thai partner at House of Male (which automatically means, no money was exchanged). We were both looking for long term partners, and it worked out fine. Sometimes he's continued working as a hotel manager; lately he's not; doesn't matter.

Thanks for sharing PB.

Come to think of it that might be another interesting topic for this forum.

Gay sauna encounters, did anything come(really bad pun) of it, and what happened afterwards?

sounds like another case of kismet to get back on topic.

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We met by accident in a chat room. I was in the Korea room looking for a quickie and he was looking to improve his english.

We kept contact chatting for a year before meeting for 2-3 times the next year (1-2 days each times)

We are now together solid for more than 1 year and 1/2

I never thought I'd start a love affair again in my life but he convinced me it was possible and I am real happy and thankful for it.

The age difference (30) makes me sometimes worry about him when I am no more but we are working on that

Life has a total other meaning when in 'real' love.

We are getting married (officialy) this year and are preparing the papers right now

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has a total other meaning when in 'real' love.

We are getting married (officialy) this year and are preparing the papers right now

You're right, krub !

I've met my spouse on the 12th/Nov/1991 on his first night ever in a gay bar in Chiang Mai (not a go-go). We hooked up inmediatly, although I was a bit apprehensive (too quick!). Sex was disappointing as I was "the first man" ever in his life, but I understood him and he started learning. He was 21 and I was 47.

We've been together now for over 16 years; we've been legally married two years ago and my whole "falang" family attended the wedding, children included.

We're VERY different in many ways; but, interesting enough, we are of the same size, shoes included.

I think that an important part of the recipe to be happy in a relationship is to be caring and funny everyday: to love and to laugh.

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When I was new (first year, maybe) here I met guys in all the usual places that tourists meet guys in, so those bases are covered, of course.

In more recent years, I have met guys the following ways:

1. Walking on the street

2. Walking in a mall

3. Standing in the train

4. Working out in the gym

5. While they were working/shopping/eating in a restaurant, shop, etc.

6. By introduction of friends

7. By introduction of strangers (!)

8. Waiting for a bus

9. Riding on a bus

10. Dancing in a (normal) gay disco

11. Dancing in a (normal) straight disco

12. Drinking in (normal) bars

13. Visiting a research facility out of curiousity

14. Walking through a hotel

15. Staying in a hotel

16. Through the internet

17. At parties

"S"

Ps.

Forgot:

18. At art exhibitions

19. At museums

I believe I could have met quite a number of gay guys through work, but it is a principle of mine to avoid mixing my personal life and my working life, so I have avoided those opportunities.

Incidentally, when I say "met," I am not necessarily implying anything sexual. I think it gives people more ideas about how they could meet eligible guys; the opportunities are legion.

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Met at telephone bar, me in Thailand working as a dive instructor down in Pattaya. Spending some time off in Bangkok and arrived at Telephone with my dive instructors shirt on. His dream was always to go diving and spent the night chatting about diving and said I'd teach him,. About one month later got a call he was in Pattaya and he'd kept my nunber and rang me. I fell in love, he not to sure but won his trust round and the rest is history.

Now together 4 years, I left thailand end of 2005, he came to UK Mar 2006 and we got hitched and life is just wonderful. Chance encouters do happen and you just never know. I'd never ever have thought I'd end up with a special man in my life and certainly not from Thailand. We share many interests and he is loved by all my family.

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Met my Thai guy in Christchurch-New Zealand almost 2 years ago in 2006 while I was working (he was 23). He left me a 'love letter' with his contact details in it at my store. Apparently, he was waiting outside for me to contact him. Never did see the note, and so I never did contact him. Poor chap, in Christchurch's weather, that's almost 8 degrees.

Few hours later...

Turned off the lights, took out the garbage, did my accounting, and went to lock the store up. Just as I was about to leave, he came back and asked if he could collect something he'd forgotten to get while he was in the store earlier. Turned out to be the love letter. He said to me, "Actually it's for you". As I opened it he ran off, and I stood there reading his letter.

Romantic guy.

Now, 2 years later, I'm living with him in Bangkok while he teaches at Mahanakorn University. He's just been offered a better job paying more than what english teachers make. I'm so proud of him.

I've put his love letter in my granny age photo album.

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After he bought a book I had written (with my author's picture on the back), my Thai partner/sleuth stalked me for three years, and finally joined a health club that he learned I had been frequenting. He made a point of working out at the machine next to mine enough times until it began to be quite awkward enough to beg conversation.

After a couple conversations he offered to tutor me in the Thai language (which I obviously needed). A few intimate language lessons in the privacy of my bedroom/study, and it just kinda snowballed from there. Ended up tutoring me in a LOT more than just language.... :o

Edited by toptuan
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Met my Thai guy in Christchurch-New Zealand almost 2 years ago in 2006 while I was working (he was 23). He left me a 'love letter' with his contact details in it at my store. Apparently, he was waiting outside for me to contact him. Never did see the note, and so I never did contact him. Poor chap, in Christchurch's weather, that's almost 8 degrees.

Few hours later...

Turned off the lights, took out the garbage, did my accounting, and went to lock the store up. Just as I was about to leave, he came back and asked if he could collect something he'd forgotten to get while he was in the store earlier. Turned out to be the love letter. He said to me, "Actually it's for you". As I opened it he ran off, and I stood there reading his letter.

Romantic guy.

Now, 2 years later, I'm living with him in Bangkok while he teaches at Mahanakorn University. He's just been offered a better job paying more than what english teachers make. I'm so proud of him.

I've put his love letter in my granny age photo album.

That is the most wonderful thing that I've read in a very long time. :o

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Hi :o

My very first relationship was an incestuous one with my half-brother (same mother, different father) starting very early - me 14, he 12. It lasted for over two years, mum knowing and accepting ("You're both guys, that makes for no trouble with babies". When i was 16, i saw an interesting car in a car park and went to look at it close - out the building came the owner, a young Asian. Turned out he had made all the way from Thailand to Germany (!!) in that car, so we got talking and he invited me to join him on the weekend for we shared another hobby - music.

It got late that weekend and i was lazy to go home, so he invited me to stay over - only one bed, and we quickly found out that we both were not only into guys but into each other. That night was the beginning of a wonderful five years, an open relationship tough for he moved far away shortly after due to work commitments and we met only on weekends, during the week we both had "outside fun" aplenty, some guys we even "shared" :D It broke apart when he had to leave Germany abruptly due to a death in his family in Thailand, and since we had no internet then (1996) and i didn't even have a telephone, we completely lost contact - from one day to the next. I never saw him again...........

My second "real" boyfriend was a German guy, this was doomed from the beginning due to his alcoholic parents taht he lived with and due to the fact that i was looking for an Asian and he for a Black guy - we "met" on one of those 0190-telephone-things by chance (me thinking he's Russian, by his name) and since we both were just lonely, we stayed together..... more a relationship born out of despair.

In 1999 we got Internet, and with it i was finally able to see that "gay Asians" do really exist - in fact HE found them for me, on a web site called "SGboy", in Singapore. And while he found his black guy on AOL chat, i was diving into a singaporean gay IRC channel thru that website. In me the wish to migrate to Singapore grew.

Well some day in late January 2000 i got a message in that very chat room from a guy, shyly asking my name..... and he was NOT in Singapore, but in Bangkok, using that same chat room to kill time. We chatted. A lot. Pictures were exchanged (i bought a scanner for that purpose) and real letters written (the paper ones). I even called him on the phone, which back then costed a truckload of money from Germany to Thailand, with a mobile phone. We fell in love, over 12.000 kilometers distance. And i changed my plan at once - no Singapore, Bangkok it will be.

And in October i booked a flight. Very limited budget, so i got a flight TWO MONTHS LATER (!!) and applied for a passport too. That took six weeks. With just two weeks time left i sent the passport off to the Thai embassy to get a two-months tourist visa, knowing that i would not leave Thailand again. And the passport arrived back two days before my flight was due!!

Meantime i had quit my job, sold my car and was all ready to go. The breakup with my then-BF was a dramatic one - not because of him since he had known from the day we met, but due to his parents - jobless alcoholics, my income was financing their lifestyle and seeing it gone they simply kicked me out, three weeks before i was due to leave. It was THEIR house so they had all the rights to do so.... however it was bad. I was then quasi homeless and found shelter at an arabic friend's place, and during those three weeks i succeeded in seducing that guy... oh what a whore i was. Gentle lovers, those straight Arabs :D

However came the day to leave, with help of my vietnamese friends i got to Frankfurt (car-less as i was then) and eagerly awaited my very first flight, talking to my future BF on the phone - no care taken, i was not to return to Germany, so screw the phone bill. Yes i'm bad. My ticket on Qantas was one-way, all i owned at that time was in my suitcase and in my wallet - 1.200 us$. The flight was delayed, again and again. Calling my boy again and again, finally i had to spend the night at the airport (the airline offered a hotel but i chose the airport). When next morning the plane still hadn't turned up, my boy thought i had changed my mind and wouldn't come - i had one of Qantas ladies talk to him but he still didn't believe.

Finally the plane came, it had been repaired and all (there was an engine problem on the previous flight BKK-FRA) and we took off with 19 hours delay, on my very first flight, on a plane with a fixed engine. Someone was QUITE nervous :D I called my boy last time when i got onto the plane........

Arriving in Bangkok, there he was, picked me up from the airport........ and brought me to the room he had rented the week earlier with money i had sent (he is from a rather poor family, yet always had a job and NEVER in "the industry", bachelor's degree and all), and today, 7 years and 39 days later we are still together and live in that same room. I was finally fully integrated into his family (who had long known that he lived with a Farang yet had no idea what type of relationship it was, as he is NOT completely out!) last year April when his dad's health became very bad... his parents had moved to Chiang Mai in the meantime and i guess he wanted to introduce me the proper way to his dad before it was too late....... well, his dad died last September and yes, i was loved by him too.

Currently we are planning to move to Chiang Mai at some stage but first we need a new car etc, and still have to keep going in Bangkok until enough money is made for that.

Best regards......

Thanh

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Thanks :o

Why brave? I am not scared of anything or anyone so i believe sharing my life is appropriate when it matches the topic of the thread or an ongoing discussion...... as being gay was never an issue for me (out and proud from the day i knew, some long time back when i was 13 or so....) i am probably the only one starting job interviews with "Hi, i'm gay, would you have any problem with that?"

Never had a problem, in fact people (bosses!) liked my straight-forwardness (is that an English word???) as there is no BS coming out of my mouth. You've got one life, enjoy it. (or, for buddhists - be honest to yourself and others at all times for your next life shall be easier).

Best regards....

Thanh

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Thanh, your story is inspiring, thank you.

I have a question as well... so are you living here illegally? It's possible to do in the U.S. (tho jobs can be hard to find), but how does one pull it off in Thailand? Excuse me for my naitivity, but I am new to this Farang/Thai lifestyle. :-)

Kevin

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Hi :o

I do not LIVE here illegally - all the time i had my visa in order (tourist, double-entry tourist, multi-non-B, multi-non-B again, 2 1/2 years of monthly border runs, now multi non-B again, in over seven years not a single day overstay) but i don't have a WP. I lack the required university degree (in Germany only some 5% of the population ever get to see a university from inside....) and hence work odd jobs and small companies who simply can not afford or meet the requirements to get a WP for a foreigner but appreciate a native German/fluent English speaker with various practical skills for one reason or another, sans degree which is only a stupid piece of paper showing that a person has wasted a considerable time learning useless theoretical stuff.

We as an expat community shouldn't whack down on people like me - i'm not a dangerous one who robs jobs off a Thai and does unqualified things (i would NOT teach because i KNOW i am not qualified!) because in the end we all just want to make a living. I support my Thai BF (who works too, he in turn supports his family as he's the only income earner there) and i have a low, but stable existence here with car and motorbike even.

Thais doing the exact same in the U.S. or Europe PROUDLY call themselves "Robin Hood". Even Thai TV calls them that when reporting about them. Yet - Farangs working without WP are seen as the greatest scum...... come on.

Best regards.....

Thanh

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I was on my way to the old airport in BKK to meet a friend coming from HK on a Friday evening. I had left early because of the horrible traffic at that time (no expressway). I realized I was quite early, so I stopped at a place in the area. I didn't know what to do, so I bought some oranges--I showed the money and ended up with a huge bag of them. I then sat down at a place and ordered a 7-up. A very nice young man was sitting there smiling. I asked if he wanted an orange. He and his friends all laughed and he took an orange. He spoke brilliant English.

I told him to call me, which he did the next day. I said "why don't you come by," which he did. We've been together ever since--around 20 years.

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Tom and I met at MacDonalds in the Robinson department store on Silom on a Sunday morning. He was having a snack before going to work (at a hotel near Siam Square), and I was there for my Sunday morning paper and coffee (there was no Starbucks, Wawee, Doi Chang, etc., in those days - McD was the place to go for coffee - ugh!)

"Picked him up" after his shift was over, and, well, that was a bit over 15 years ago now.

PS - boycott MacDonalds - they donate HEAVILY to fund candidates opposing same-sex marriage in the USA. They also donate heavily to initiative drives to amend state constitutions to prohibit same-sex marriage.

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I broke my life long rule " Never date the Bartender " and I'm so glad I did , together 6 years now and counting .

He is the best thing to happen to me in a long and very fortunate life , He has great dignity and what used to be called class that never falters . An Isaan Prince and a brutish Sicilian , the odd couple to say the least

Silom soi 4

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I was on my way to the old airport in BKK to meet a friend coming from HK on a Friday evening. I had left early because of the horrible traffic at that time (no expressway). I realized I was quite early, so I stopped at a place in the area. I didn't know what to do, so I bought some oranges--I showed the money and ended up with a huge bag of them. I then sat down at a place and ordered a 7-up. A very nice young man was sitting there smiling. I asked if he wanted an orange. He and his friends all laughed and he took an orange. He spoke brilliant English.

I told him to call me, which he did the next day. I said "why don't you come by," which he did. We've been together ever since--around 20 years.

Scott, thanks for sharing!

Sounds as though you did not get an orange, but rather a PEACH!

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  • 3 weeks later...

Some nice stories on here so far, thanks for sharing guys.

I met my Thai partner by complete chance on my Birthday night out last year. I didn't actually feel like going out, even though it was my 21st, my housemates persuaded me along though. We started off at Chiang Mai Saloon and then headed to Bubble nightclub.

I noticed a really cute Thai guy looking at me from the other side of the bar. My friend told me he wasn't gay, but I knew he was! We couldn't stop looking at each other! We didn't speak for a while until we bumped into one another when I was coming out from the toilets, a move I have since found out that he planned, and I have a lot to thank his friend for for asking me in her best English "will you speak with my friend?" I did, we went for dinner the next night. A series of dates followed, everyday that week. By his birthday, 7 days later, he moved into my house.

It was pretty intense but we both knew it felt really good. Strange thing was I didn't want to go out that night, and he shouldn't have even been in Thailand that night. He didn't feel like going out either, his friend had dragged him out with her. Seemed like it was meant to be.

Now, almost 10 months later, we are married and planning a future together, currently working on the UK visa plans. I'm the happiest I have ever been and safe in the knowledge that our relationship is true, we are only 4 years apart in age and we both have similar goals in our lives so we wont let any farang stereotypes stand in our way!

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we are chat friend on MSN for a year. He's from Amsterdam and I'm here in Thailand. A night at the party ( my friend going to live with his bf in Australia) in BKK. My friends and I went to Dj... and then coincident to meet him. After that night we growing our relationship. LOL

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