Wedding Planning

[Spee]

Requesting help from the forum ....

Starting to plan for my fiancee's and my wedding next year and want to properly plan and budget for a nice party after the ceremony. But I'm at a loss for trying to guess how much it might cost.

Not really in a big rush because the wedding is next year. But I do need to start planning and more importantly budgeting.

The ceremony will be in my fiancee's home village, which has probably 2 dozen families in the immediate area and perhaps 50-100 people in the entire village. From what I've read, I should expect everyone to show up at the party, and probably then some.

Getting wedding day clothes made for everyone is not a problem. A good friend of the family is an excellent seamstress, and she will help getting everyone's clothes together. I'm not worried about the costs with her.

Here is sort of what I have in mind so far:

- enough beer, whiskey, water, soft drinks to last all day and into the night; without getting too wacky, can anyone help quantify how much this might be and how much it might cost

- for food, I was thinking about a few dozen chickens, a couple of pigs, maybe 15-20 pounds of fish, along with sufficient quantities of rice, vegetables and fruit; does anyone know if there is a company or two to pick from in the Taphan Hin or Phichit area that handles large scale parties like this one

- for karaoke entertainment, I have no idea where to start (DJ Pat or DaveThailand, anyone with music experience, any ideas?); would I rent the service by the hour or by the day; anyone know of a reliable DJ?

- flowers and assorted decorations for our house (not sure yet what all that will entail at this point), any suggestions appreciated

- during my last trip, I was introduced to a couple of the local medics and one of the local policemen (all very nice people), so I can probably work out some arrangements with them for safety and security coverage; but I have no idea what I might be expect to pay for these kinds of services

I'm thinking that if I try to cap my budget at something between $1500-$2000 US, or roughly 60K-80K TB, then I should probably be okay.

What does everybody think? Am I in the ballpark? Way off base? Too high? Too low? Too much stuff? Not enough? Any suggestions?

Thanks in advance for all suggestions!! Feel free to PM.

[ZOVOX]

Outside bangkok, you can book a five star hotel reception for about 300 baht per person - expect to have about 200 people, because everybody will come and then some. The hotel will throw in a lot of extras for you, like flowers, soft drinks etc, so this will take care of most of the stuff you need. However, you'lll need to book a band and photographer - about 2-3000 baht each. also, alcohol you can buy yourself and bring to the reception and ask the staff to serve anyone who wants booze.

Also, it is traditional for guests to bring cash gifts for the wedding couple in envelopes - this will cover most of the costs of the wedding reception, so you can have a really good bash - GOOD LUCK !!

[tayto]

As they say in Thailand.............UP TO YOU.

Better let the in-laws take care of it.

Every village has a local music system that can be hire by the day.

[Sulaphat]

As they say in Thailand.............UP TO YOU.

Better let the in-laws take care of it.

Every village has a local music system that can be hire by the day.

Agree.

Let the in-laws arrange it. The people in the village will also undoubtedly prefer live Thai music and there are lots of musicians for hire up-country. Villages also tend to have chairs, awnings, stage, etc. to set up an open-air bash.

You might want to ask your fiancee how much your in-laws think it would cost and then make the necessary contribution up front via your fiancee.

I hope you have a great wedding and sucessful marriage.

[Spee]

Let the in-laws arrange it. The people in the village will also undoubtedly prefer live Thai music and there are lots of musicians for hire up-country. Villages also tend to have chairs, awnings, stage, etc. to set up an open-air bash.

You might want to ask your fiancee how much your in-laws think it would cost and then make the necessary contribution up front via your fiancee.

Thanks for the advice!

For the other poster who recommended doing things through a hotel, thanks but we'll most likely pass on that one. The village is in central Thailand (rural but not remote) and to get everyone to a larger city would be a difficult undertaking.

Also, we wanted to have the ceremony and party at our new home, which sits on 1 rai of land and is on a quiet side street just far enough away from the main drag. There should be enough space to accommodate everybody. We can probably arrange to block off the side street.

My only "in-law" is khun-mae and she will probably be ready and willing to help a lot. But I don't want to load the whole burden on to her as her health is a little dodgy. The village does have a popular restaurant with decent food. They would probably want the business but I'll have to see if they can handle the volume. Possibly they have others they can call upon.

My fiancee's brother is a really good guy and I'm sure will also help out a lot. He and some of his mates probably know some distributors in the nearby towns who can help out with refreshments, ice, etc.

Good idea with the live music versus karaoke, as long as they are reliable and can be counted on to show up. Maybe it is better to hire 2 bands, as they can allow for breaks and also give a back-up if one or the other doesn't show.

As far as the cost goes, I'm not that concerned about the total, so long as it isn't completely over the top and I can estimate it within about plus or minus 20%. The 200 guests x 300 TB per equals 60K TB and is probably a pretty reasonable starting point.

Any more ideas anyone??

PS. Also forgot to ask, what is a standard or reasonable gift for the monks who come to do the ceremony, in terms of money in the envelope and food??

Fortunately no issues with a dowry. My fiancee' is a widow, but she still wants a traditional ceremony including showing off a dowry to the neighbors. But she and I and her mother have already agreed this would be just for show. The money will be a modest but decent amount, laid out for all to see, handed over to khun mae and then later returned to us.

[Jeff Jarvis]

You just have to show up. Give them a budget. That's it.

The family will want to do everything their way.

These affairs can last several days.

The DJ will play the music at ear shattering levels 24 hrs a day.

Want to sleep? Forget about it!

The food served will make you wish for a modern bathroom very nearby....

All the neighbors expect to get drunk as possible the entire time.

Major party, dude.

[ZOVOX]

If you are having the party at home, then expect a lot of noise: although we had a hotel reception, in the morning, during the wedding ceremony, the speakers they had were bigger than the house !!

[Baaksida]

Also, it is traditional for guests to bring cash gifts for the wedding couple in envelopes - this will cover most of the costs of the wedding reception...

Just curious to know, as my wedding will be very expensive (hundreds of Thai guests who I don't know...), does it make a difference as for the guests' cash gifts whether the groom is Thai or 'farang'??

[Spee]

If you are having the party at home, then expect a lot of noise

I'm not worried about the noise. In the village all the hens and roosters are up an hour before dawn, and the loudspeakers broadcast the news from 6am-8am each morning.

As far as Jeff's comment on the drinking goes, I'm expecting people (males in particular) to drink to excess. As long as I can arrange for adequate police security coverage, I'm hoping things will be able to be controlled.

For the food, I most concerned about having enough to stuff everyone, and not so much about what it is.

[tutsiwarrior]

Last year we had our house blessed and had a party later for about 250 people. Our small town has a tessaban premises that has a large area available for hire for these types of functions at nominal cost. The wife arranged a catered 5 course meal (more food than people could finish), music with singers and dancers, large elevated stage and enormous sound system and all the booze, soft drinks and etc. people could drink. Party ended at 12am as we had to be off the premises soon after. Managed that one for about 60k baht.

[MaiSonJai]

Managed that one for about 60k baht.

Food:20K

Booze:40K

Normal party n Thailand, Tutsi..

[Spee]

Managed that one for about 60k baht.

Food:20K

Booze:40K

Normal party n Thailand, Tutsi..

Good points Tutsi & MaiSonJai! Never thought of it that way.

We are planning to have the house blessing (& presumably party also) just after the Chistmas holidays.

That should help gauge the wedding party costs fairly well.

Thanks again!

[duke69]

keep the party not too long, since 200 guests have sometime to pee and s hit, and without a proper location this would leave a nice morning smell for several days.

Do not undervaluate the security service since you can have many of them drunk.

Monks do expect money: you're Farang so about 200-300$ will be more than OK.

Where you live you might have problem with the power, since the lighting and music will easily bring power breakdowns.

From my experience you then have to organize also a small playground for kids, so the parents can get drunk more easily.

Security also inside your home, otherwise the morning after you will be looking for your bed and mattress.

Cash from guests: in villages expect about 100 Baht from each guest in cash, they cannot afford much more.

[ZOVOX]

Also, it is traditional for guests to bring cash gifts for the wedding couple in envelopes - this will cover most of the costs of the wedding reception...

Just curious to know, as my wedding will be very expensive (hundreds of Thai guests who I don't know...), does it make a difference as for the guests' cash gifts whether the groom is Thai or 'farang'??

As a farang, you'll probably get less because they assume you don't need the money. However, you should still get a tidy some; the amount given probably has more to do with the wealth of the giver. Also, nobody wants to be seen as a miser !

[chanchao]

I don't quite see how being foreign would affect the price of most things, other than that you may have specific requests for liquor or food, like wine and specific snacks that would increase the bill.

I can dig up all the expenses of my wedding. Like some other people said, with the gifts added in the think almost pays for itself. But then again this was kind of like a middle class wedding held in a resort outside of Chiang Mai. Something like 250 per head for the food buffet & soft drinks & use of their grounds and party room. (Neaby resorts charged 200 baht but were not quite as nice) They also took care of a morning Lanna-Thai wedding that involved monks; gifts, food and donations for the monks were all handles by the resort. (And it was NOWEHERE near 200-300 US$ !!!) More like 500 baht for each monk. Then there's charges for other things if you want them... flower decorations (they did an awesome job for less money than I could have arranged myself), wedding cake, those silly ice-carvings, sound & karaoke, computer projector & screen, minivans to truck in guests without cars.. In the end though I think we pretty much broke even. (I stopped my wife doing an Excel sheet with everyone's exact amounts and compare this with expenses.. What the <deleted>.. This is NOT a business venture, we don't NEED to break even. I'm just as happy spending an extra 20,000 baht as I am making an additional 20K. What is it with Thai people's weddings and money anyway.. My major concern from the start was always to NOT bore my guests to death like on so many middle class hotel weddings. I completely don't care what it costs as long as money is spent on Sanuk-contributing factors.

Another concern is 'effort'. Letting the resort take care of it takes a LOAD of work off your hands.. In the end you're like.. 'Okay, I KNOW I can find a better wedding cake than anything they can come up with, but do I really want to go find a good one and worry about the logistics of getting it delivered in time, etc, etc.

'khong chamruay' : gifts for the guests. Here we found a great deal at a ceramics factory: I didn't want those standard worthless keychain like trinkets. Got some really nice things (i.e. things I actually may have bought myself) and as we bought in quantity from the factory, these were like 15 baht each. (For items that go for 300 baht in gift shops even in Chiang Mai town!) Guests loved them; we got loads and were able to give some guests some extra for friends/family who couldn't attend.

Others.. clothing of course.. had a suit made for like 8000 baht.. Printing invitation cards (also way cheaper than I thought; 1000 baht bought loads of them, got my own design printed in color) This is important because it provides guests with an envelope to put the money in.

Pictures: Friend of mine did an awesome job taking pictures. Video: Erm.. less professional overall but it has a lot of charm to it. )) I think video does add something that pictures don't, the monks chanting, the tieing of strings, the wedding rings, the vows, the wedding bouquet throwing.. With some rigorous editing on the computer it made a really nice DVD of the day. (Kept it down to like 15-20 minutes for the Thai ceremony and the same for the Western wedding; I hate sitting through other people's long wedding videos

It's kind of fun preparing things and not as expensive as you'd think really.

Oh yes: At the end of the day, your average village wedding is LOADS more fun than your average middle class hotel / resort wedding, and they cost less. You're doing the right thing.

Cheers,

Chanchao

Edited October 12, 2004 by chanchao

[duke69]

beh Chanchao 10$ to each monk looks pretty much cheap Charlie!!!

I said 200$ in total as Farang, I have only experience on the celebration of the opening of our factory, 10 monks = 500US$, and they probably were satisfied but not dancing on the table at all (may be they were expecting something more).

Can you please give me some address of the factory where you bought the wedding gift for 15 Baht and provide (if exists) of a WEB site where I can check what they have for sale??

In a few months I will have the same problem with my wedding and I would like to give my guests something nice, useful, but not toooooo pricy

[chanchao]

> I said 200$ in total as Farang, I have only experience on the celebration of

> the opening of our factory, 10 monks = 500US$, and they probably were

> satisfied but not dancing on the table at all (may be they were expecting

> something more).

Well the advantage of resorts is that they tend to be in very out of the way areas where monks are really happy if something other than plain rice ends up in their bowls in the morning. And the money was separate from the ubiqutous yellow buckets though. I think those were like 200 baht each as well.

At the end of the day, a monk is not supposed to be either joyful or sad because of amounts received. People give what they think is appropriate, and that's pretty much it. It's the ultimate 'up to you' really.

> Can you please give me some address of the factory where

> you bought the wedding gift for 15 Baht and provide (if exists)

> of a WEB site where I can check what they have for sale??

Note they were not intended as wedding gifts, they just fit the bill for out pruposes. And we were lucky as they were just having a factory sale. But the name was Dhanabadee in Lampang.

You can see some pics here:

http://www.netasia.org/album/displayimage.php?album=11&pos=0

Yes there's a website. It's at www.dhanabadee.com

Edited October 12, 2004 by chanchao

[RamdomChances]

I cant remember the complete breakdown of costs but, we got married and had a big wedding, over 1000 people in the night, loads or people and family staying here all needing feeding ect, huge music system, singers dancers ect, food drinks, little things to give eveyone (I think they were standerd little key rings ) . Anyway it came to a total of about 140,000 but we got 80,000 back from the guests. Really good time, I've been to a few hotel wedings, not as much fun.

We bought our own food and drink but paid people to cook and serve, I think we paid by the table 140 tables. I left the misses and her mother sort most of the details out , her mums brilliant at geting good deals.

The drink is easy, a bottle of whisky a table, coke, fanta, water and ice, plus a couple of cases of beer and whisky for the day, and a few bottles of regency if you have a vip table.

Cheers RC

[Spee]

Thanks chanchao and RC ... good stuff ...