Stigma

[egg6447]

FACT or FICTION - Let's be straight....90% of foreigners date women who are deemed most unattractive for Thai people

To get an answer to that you'd have to ask the opinions of Thai people - It would be no good asking Foreigners to give the opinions of Thai people bacause by definition that would be second hand information.

However, for a first hand opinion, and while I'm not Thai, I can confirm that I find at least 90% of the women dating Farang's in Thailand un attractive - It's quite rare that I see a Farang with an attractive Thai woman.

But then maybe I'm fussy.

i,m with you on this one. i dont find thai WOMEN, for marmahoot, atractive, sure you get the stunners but in general, no, they are just very pleasant. just run this thread past my wife. she feels that its down to dress sense most of the time as you can tell if a girl ,oops, is in farang mode or not. she said that the women at the market ask why she doesn,t dress like a falang,s bint.

[egg6447]

many of you brits will remember, oversexed, overpaid and over here. for you non brits, ist a reference to the yanks in war time uk. now there is the parallel to thailand. the brits should be able to think back to the views of the older brits of the time, any girl with a yank is/was a skank. much the same as thai,s??. looking back the girls that went with yanks did it for the adventure the money and yes,,,,, love. it still goes on by the way. ring any bells out there??.

[mrt273nva]

I just want to make a post before I lose my train of thought. First of all this is a great thread. For one of the first times in Thai Visa history people are contributing to a thread with very little bashing. It seems that this is a topic that most can relate to. I'm going to go back in a moment and read the rest of the posts.

Anyway, to offer my 2 satongs worth.

When I was first with my wife in Thailand I would get self conscious in many public places. It seemed that everyone was looking at us. Though disturbed, we continued together. Over time it seemed that the looks faded away. What was before looks of disapproval had turned into looks of curiousity. Now I am extremely proud to be seen in public with my wife, and I believe that our body language is such now that it must be obvious to outsiders that we are together. Having a baby helps a bit I'm sure. Suddenly the rest of the world doesn't matter and you are entirely focused on your family. I can't think of the last time I had an evil look from anyone concerning our relationship. Once in a while I'll get a look of confusion from people which is easily remedied with a warm smile. If strangers have the idea that somehow our relationship is wrong, well then I am no longer aware of it.

I am curious however how people will react to us when we are back in the US. We are planning a move there in the next year or two, and it is a completely different culture (one that I have lost touch with). But after some adjustment I'm sure it will be back to normal.

[CarlBkk]

Yep, half of the Thais out there assume that any farang with a Thai (white skinned or otherwise) must be a playboy and the girl an easy lay or a paid-for lay. The other half will use some judgement and decide if the couple looks "genuine" or otherwise. Perceptions are going to continue being confused whilst so many young/old/ugly/goodlooking farangs are proudly showing off unattractive bargirl-appearance girls and others are selectively dating more educated/international/attractive Thai girls in a relationship which has nothing to do with money. Both types of relationships are increasing here, so whilst Thai society sometimes thinks "hey, this is the 2000s...higher class Thai girls go for farangs now" they then see a stereotypical farang/thai couple and think "oh my God, must have picked her up at a bar or CM2". The latter also reflecting on a part of Thai society that then associates most farangs with being unchoosy sex addicts who go for dirty, ugly, poor, dark, low class women.

But yes, as someone said before there are many middle and higher class Thai girls deemed perfect wife material in Thai society who would consider dating a foreigner IF she was able to meet a decent one. But what are the chances of that? These girls are also attractive for Thai men and work with them/get introduced to them on a regular basis so the chances of ending up with one is higher. The decent young foreign guy in an office job here will undoubtedly get the pick of some lovely women (unless he gets found out frequenting Cowboy) as more often than not these women don't visit nightclubs. It's all about opportunity. The darker/poorer girls and also the darker/educated girls KNOW that they're not attractive in their society and soon realise they fit in with foreigners much more easily with no judgement. More often than not they also try harder/flirt more and end up with one whereas the lighter more innocent girls don't feel the need to.

[sriracha john]

First of all this is a great thread. For one of the first times in Thai Visa history people are contributing to a thread with very little bashing.

really?? ok, if you say so... I must have misread half this thread then... but thanks for adding humor to it.

[mrt273nva]

First of all this is a great thread. For one of the first times in Thai Visa history people are contributing to a thread with very little bashing.

really?? ok, if you say so... I must have misread half this thread then... but thanks for adding humor to it.

people are contributing with their own personal experiences and genuine feelings on the subject. Constructive argument is different than bashing. There is a different tone to this thread which is refreshing.

[Cavannagh]

First of all this is a great thread. For one of the first times in Thai Visa history people are contributing to a thread with very little bashing.

really?? ok, if you say so... I must have misread half this thread then... but thanks for adding humor to it.

people are contributing with their own personal experiences and genuine feelings on the subject. Constructive argument is different than bashing. There is a different tone to this thread which is refreshing.

Indeed. Thanks to everyone for posting there experiences.

I don't particularly care what some Tuk-tuk driver thought about me personally...but when some ignorant scum assumes that the one who I love and respect above all others is a whore....well, it burned me up inside and I wanted to turn around jab this guy in the nose.

We've been through a lot in the last 5 years and I guess this is just a small, inconsequential blip on the radar. As unfortunate as it is, I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who has/will put up with this.

[learnthaipodcast]

Never an issue personally - nor would I care. If someone is that ignorant, than not worth my effort to correct them.

I second that. Why would I care about such simple minded people. Let them live in their own, small world.

That is punishment enough.

[sriracha john]

Never an issue personally - nor would I care. If someone is that ignorant, than not worth my effort to correct them.

I second that. Why would I care about such simple minded people. Let them live in their own, small world.

That is punishment enough.

so it all comes down to something that's the same as 125 posts ago on post #4...

[Cavannagh]

sriracha john

so it all comes down to something that's the same as 125 posts ago on post #4...

Congratulations, your grace and self-esteem are to be commended...I am obviously lesser man.

Now go do some more posting, you seem to be good at it.

[bkkjames]

Your situation sounds to be the exception and I really could give a rats arse either way. You are still using generalizations to group Thais and your last sentance use an exception to make your point. Most farangs I see aren't dating girls that work in offices. Also, I wasn't aware that office girls are not attracted to money.

I guess we don't hang out in the same places (reference to most farangs u see). You are correct, office girls from Thailand and the west are both interested in money as well. Who isn't? But my point is that those u see hanging around with farangs are doing so to support their baby that was given to them by some long gone thai male who bolted once he had his fun and is now dishing out taxi rides in Bangkok and elsewhere. Makes me feel really sorry for these guys.

No, I'm just more observant. Haven't spent much time in BK, so possibly the majority of Farangs date professionals. In CM and many other tourist areas, this isn't the case - not even close.

Most Thai guys don't knock up women and bolt. I have met women that tell their farang boyfriends that their unfaithfull Thai husband left them with their child. In many cases, it was a mutual decision based on the ability of the wife to earn substantial money in the sex industry. The reason why Thai women hang around Farangs is endless and your opinion is too simplistic.

Thailand is fortunate to have such a large number of kind Farangs, supporting abused Thai women . I have no issues with Farangs dating Thais of all ilks, but ignoring the reality is self serving.

So I am to understand from your second paragraph, that because women you have met tell farangs it was because the Thai husband being unfaithful was the reason for their mutual split? I am not denying that it is sure the case in some cases, however if you are willing to accept the 'truth' as gospel from them speaks volumes as well.

In your scenario, man impregnates wife and then wife finds out he was also screwing around so therefore they mutually break up so she can go earn more money in the 'business' to support their kid. In reality in Bangkok, a large portion of the youngish 17-20 year old gals in the 'business' are doing so to support kids given to them (not by there husbands) but by some Thai guy who then bolted. Don't take my word for it, go ask them yourself.

But I guess the situation in CM must be different than here.

Wow! Read what I wrote. Never stated, what they said was gospel and you made my point yourself. You criticize me for discussing the fact that some/many Thai women leave their kid and husband to work in the sex industry. Then you tell me to ask the women to get to the truth. Now that is an intelligent idea and I will definitely take their words as "gospel". I do know quite a few that left their husbands because they wanted to work in BK. A few are still married and maintain a relationship with the husband. My Thai wife tells me this is very common. Keep up the generalizations.

You need to get out of the tiny world you live and experience the world thee rest of us live in or keep denying reality to as a means to feel good about your actions. Does your woman have a previous child?

Not my wife, but a previous girl friend had one. Does that count. Tiny little world? Ok, I guess that is an attempt at a comeback. Speaking of generalizations, "Your wife tells you its very common".

Anyways, I can see that this will go on and on and on and on, and quite frankly its boring.