- You can't eat fruit anymore without putting salt on it

Ya buy hawker foods without worring about

......how fresh, hygeine etc...

And ENJOY it, go back for more.

My first trip to LoS, 5 years ago, noway was I gunna eat any of that stuff.

you spend all day and night on this forum

You look 4 ways when crossing a one-way street.

You carry your bus fare in your ear.

You walk slowly and weave erratically to stop the person behind from passing. This is also applicable to driving.

You take some rubbish to the skip and come away with more than you brought.

You stand on the pavement to watch TV through a shop window.

Talk loudly into your mobile phone whilst saying khap or kha a lot.

You are 60 minutes late for an appointment and nobody even notices.

You chew sugar-free gum instead of brushing your teeth.

You clicked 'add to favorites' for this page...

You acquire a taste for Durian ( i haven't but i know a farang who has!)

Wonder why the Som Tom isn't as spicy as it used to be

Ask for Ice to put IN your beer

You are irritated when your order is relayed to the cook with 'mai phet' added.

You can't eat boiled rice without prik naam plaa

You drink beer with ice

You wai other foreigners when introduced, as a conditioned response

You never pay more than 1000 baht for an article of clothing

It no longer seems unusual to have to sign 100 pages of gibberish in order to make the smallest purchase for your company

Lack of toilet paper is no longer a problem

You can eat several kilos of fruit in a day

A drinking session involves several men, some highly spiced food, sticky rice, a bottle of whisky and one small glass

You want to buy a tractor

Mosquitoes seem to bite you less and less

- You just bought your second rice cooker

- You feel naked without your Buddhist Amulet around your neck

- Your pakama is worn so thin, your wife nags you about it

you spend all day and night on this forum

Which I do, where ever I am.

TV addict.

- you miss wearing warm clothes and using a blanket

You set the office temperature at 16.5 cold and bring along a jacket with you .

You don't want to go anywhere else !

When you think you are in the set of Planet of The Apes the movie.

You can watch Thai television programmes for an hour without feeling like slitting your wrists. Then you start enjoying some programs and rush downstairs at 10.30 because you don't want to miss Mum, Teng and Nong in Ching Roi Ching Lahn.

^^^^Dude you are heavy! I will never reach that stage.

You believe everyone is lying to you, but you don't care

You believe everyone is trying to get a few extra baht out of your pocket, but you don't care

You are totally stuck in the moment, and can't make a move (same as w. coyote)

"you let ignorance slide much more than you would in the west (they are just thai, not stupid)"

I call it oblivion. Otherwise, I agree

You think Mr Bean is the height of comedy and the funniest thing since time began.

you spend all day and night on this forum

ain't that the truth!

i think thai visa needs to sponsor a rehab program...

you can stick your nose in a pot of oyster sauce and it actually smells nice

• · You eventually learn there is no Thai equivalent for "being on time"
  
• · You accept that planning and evolution mean the same thing in Thai
  
• · Wearing socks feels overdressed and it's difficult to remember how to tie shoe-laces
  
• · You stop going into the local 7/11 to cool off
  
• · The local 7/11 is really cold
  
• · Your remaining friends 'back home' stop warning you that "she" (now your wife) is only after your money because they can see she now has it
  
• · You stop searching for a proper map of the place where you live
  
• · You communicate with your remaining friends 'back home' in Thai Pidgin English missing out verbs, definite articles etc and they assume it's just a progressive symptom of the dementia that took you to Thailand in the first place
  
• · You stop saying mai khao jai – not because you do khao jai, but because you know it's pointless·
  
• 'Back home' now looks alien
  

·

- you think a 200cc motorbike is cool

- you start talking with your mom and friends at home in baby english

Upon entering any house, you can leave your thongs on the doorstep without slowing your stride ..

You drive your pickup with bare feet .. have control gas pedal more, with big toe ..

You talk louder than your mother-in-law ..

.. and not so funny ..

You never swerve or slow down for dogs on the road ..

You don't slow down when driving through a village ..

You always order "Tom Yum Gop" or "Tom Yum Ma " because you find it the tastiest dish on the menu ..

When visiting your home country you alwasy insist on having a large tablespoon set at your place on the dinner table.

- You eat with a fork in the right hand, tablespoon in the left

- You have moved a family member and her younger son to a different village (BKK -> Satun area) and 5 other family members had to ride along

You let your bush knife get rusty so it will be easier to sharpen

You start wai-ing to spirit houses, shrines, temples everytime you pass one.

Your wrist are covered by an assortment of strings that you get from the temples.

20 baht is good as gold

Your wife goes to bed with an inch of bare skin showing and you think she looks sexy.

You consider a full English breakfast to be exotic food.